Writing Feedback / IELTS 2: encouraging businesses to relocate from metropolitans to regional areas. [3]

Moving industries into rural area

Task 2 : In some countries, governments are encouraging industries and businesses to move to regional areas outside the big cities.
Do the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?

By virtue of massive industrialization, a myriad of businesses and firms are being set up all over the world. As a matter of fact, in recent decades, many governors have established deliberate policies to encourage these to relocate from metropolitans to regional areas. Although this phenomenon has some drawbacks, I believe that it would bring more benefits to not only employees but also those nations.

On the one hand, relocating businesses and firms to regional area does have some negative effects. One of them is the lack of availability of skilled workers fitting the job description. In fact, most of labor in these areas only have experience in agriculture-related work, meanwhile, employees in the city of often have experience with industrial working environments. The other disadvantage is companies based in regional areas are further from their clients, providers and other contacts. Therefore, the transportation process would cost more expenditure required, resulting in higher price of products.

On the other hand, the cons as discussed above are eclipsed by the pros. Despite higher transportation costs, businesses can take advantage of lower price required to set up big factories on the outskirts. Furthermore, in the domain of urban planning, this trend would help to attract labor from overcrowded metropolitans, balancing the proportion of urban residents and rural ones as well as well as alleviating environmental problems. In addition, this relocating process would provide thousands of jobs for citizens, reducing the unemployment rate of the countries.

In conclusion, in spite of the lack of effective workers and higher transportation costs, moving businesses and firms from big cities to rural areas would be more auspicious for setting up big factories, provide jobs and avoid further overcrowding in cities. In light of aforementioned evidence, it could be argued that this trend has more merits than downsides, therefore, should be continued to encouraged by governors.

Writing Feedback / IELTS Task 2: Disappearance of high street shops [5]

Task 2:Many high street shops have gone out of business in recent years.
Why do you think this has happened? Is it a positive or negative development?

DISAPPEARANCE OF HIGH STREET SHOPS

It is true that the number of traditional shops on the streets has decreased significantly in recent years. This essay would initially attempt to pinpoint the causes of this phenomenon and subsequently show my belief that this is a negative trend in the long run.

In my opinion, the disappearance of these traditional shops could be primarily attributed to the advent of online shopping services. Compared to brick-and-mortar shops, online shopping platforms are faster, cheaper and more convenient in different ways. People can sit at home, search for the best deal, pay, and receive a delivery the next day without having to go to many shops to find needed items. As for me, I would probably prefer to purchase books on Amazon, which is e-commerce websites, due to its convenience and economization. Hence, a large number of shops succumb to internet purchasing and shopping and ultimately vanish.

As far as I am concerned, the scarcity of traditional shops followed by the prevalence of online purchasing would bring about negative effects in the long run. From an environmental perspective, the transporting process to the online customer would produce a substantial amount of emissions, making a contribution to severe air pollution. Furthermore, to some extent, I believe this tendency would result in loss of cultural diversity as a number of communities would slowly fade away. For instance, future generations in Vietnam would not have a chance to observe lively and colorful traditional shops.

In conclusion, online shopping is the primary reason for the significant disappearance of brick-and-mortar shops. In light of aforementioned evidence, I am behind the idea that this could have serious repercussions on the environment as well as national cultural diversity.

P/S: I have a question :< . My friends told me that in an IELTS essay, we should avoid using words like " I" ," my " . However, I think these words are necessary in tasks which require our personal opinion. Could you guys please tell me whether or not we should use these words please ? Thanks