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Posts by tennisqueen93
Joined: Dec 29, 2010
Last Post: Dec 30, 2010
Threads: 2
Posts: 14  
From: United States of America

Displayed posts: 16
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tennisqueen93   
Dec 29, 2010
Undergraduate / "Conversing with my AP Biology teacher" - Northwestern Common App [9]

Hi guys, here's my NU essay. I really hope it's good! Any feedback is welcome. Thank you!

The few days that I spent in Chicago over spring break were nothing short of exhilarating and eye opening. Stepping outside of my usual suburban girl bubble, I took extra care to experience and breathe in every essence of the Windy city. I tried an eclectic mix of foods from Chicago hot dogs to sashimi (I didn't know I was eating raw fish), spent copious amounts of time watching busy people bustle by with high tech cell phones, and had a fleeting 10 minute romance with a beluga whale in Shedd Aquarium. My excited father had decided to save the best for last. On our final day in Chicago, he dragged the sleepy family out of our warm, cozy beds at dawn and promised a very good college tour. Early mornings never allowed me to fully appreciate his intentions; I grumbled in protest as my unnerving father steered the rented Honda down Chicago's highways.

As it turned out, this was one of those instances where the parent was right. As I rubbed my tired eyes and chomped on a warm bagel, the Searle Medical Research Building and Morton Medical Research Building loomed in the distance. As my enthusiastic father explained the kinds of research that were occurring within those walls, I unleashed my imagination and envisioned myself in a solemn laboratory coat, using electron microscopes to peer into the cell nucleus. The end of the day brought many fond farewells; the image of the research buildings silhouetted against the dark blue of Lake Michigan was forever imprinted in my mind. Returning home after my trip brought forth more research of Northwestern. I garnered every type of paper and electronic resource I had and set to work. The purple guidebook with its vividly hued pages unfolded to stories about Big Ten basketball games, the philanthropic Dance Marathon and other excerpts of colorful campus life. While perusing the North by Northwestern website, I suppressed giggles at the article "Hanky Panky or Handy Panties" as author Lauren Bonenberger described her experiences hand sewing Halloween-themed underwear. The newsmagazine was written with such impressive creativity and wit that led me to envision my own publication about the various attractions at Northwestern. I wanted to learn even more about life as a Wildcat.

Conversing with my AP Biology teacher one day about the possibilities at Northwestern led me to a new discovery: the Integrated Science Program. ISP enthralled me with its tight knit community of fellow science obsessed students and the ISP house, distinct to nowhere else but Northwestern. The best part is its fusion of mathematics and science in a unified curriculum; I had always been a science geek but I found that with a solid foundation in mathematics, science made so much more sense. For instance, taking calculus in high school helped me through the tedious math related acid-base problems in chemistry. Within ISP, I could seek help on my latest cell genome project, engage in discussions with knowledgeable professors about quantum mechanics, and even access the ISP House at 2 in the morning to cook Nissin ramen if I chose to. Northwestern provides me the close knit community I crave in a program such as ISP. I long to meet my new friends at The Rock, attend biology class with my intelligent classmates, and continue to explore my research options at Northwestern.
tennisqueen93   
Dec 29, 2010
Undergraduate / "Successful people graduated from Northwestern University" - Northwestern supplement essay [6]

You should elaborate who you met, why did she/he influence you, etc.

So far my Northwestern experience has been full of hopes of dreams of attending the McCormick School of Engineering has always been highly ranked with so many different combinations of classes to take

awkward sentence? fiz it would make the flow seem more natural..

Critique mine please? thanks! :)
tennisqueen93   
Dec 29, 2010
Undergraduate / Purple - Unique qualities, Northwestern Supplement Essay (Why NU?) [5]

First paragraph- absolutely adorable.

When I visited Northwestern University's Bienen School of Music last fall with a Peabody violin ensemble, I was extremely pleased to hear of the multitudes of music opportunities available for non-majors

the 'peabody violin ensemble' slightly confuses me

amazing conclusion. good luck!

Critique my NU one as well? ty!
tennisqueen93   
Dec 29, 2010
Undergraduate / "Inspiration through Curiosity" - Common Application Essay [3]

You should make your intro more lively, since it IS a really interesting incident!

other than that, beautiful essay. with a tweaked intro it should be shooting for the stars.
hahahah awful pun intended. :D

read mine as well? :D
tennisqueen93   
Dec 30, 2010
Undergraduate / "favorite angiosperm, Hubert," - short MIT Supplement [8]

We know you lead a busy life, full of activities, many of which are required of you. Tell us about something you do for the pleasure of it. (*)(100 words or fewer)

My favorite angiosperm, Hubert, often steals me away from my friends in the summertime. This oak tree provides the perfect excuse for me to escape my mundane reality by spending the afternoon outside and doing whatever I please. I can munch on frozen grapes, discreetly watch joggers pass by on my high perch, and even recite Henry V at the top of my lungs if I choose to. Sitting on Hubert's branches takes me to my own utopia, where nagging parents and stress from the ACT test melt away with each deep, calming breath.

feedback please and thank you! :D:D
tennisqueen93   
Dec 30, 2010
Undergraduate / "favorite angiosperm, Hubert," - short MIT Supplement [8]

Kruti- thank you very much! I think I might stick to the angiosperm since I love bio... hahaha but I loved your corrections. :D

Nattaree- The prompt asked me to describe something I do in my free time and I happen to enjoy climbing trees.
tennisqueen93   
Dec 30, 2010
Undergraduate / "When I first met Alan Graham.." - influential figure common app [6]

I had always been taught to stay away from strangers asking for money, but the man standing in front of me had a vintage-looking Fender Telecaster dangling around his neck, so I couldn't resist. He was wearing a tattered Cubs hat and old blue jeans and, with a beaming smile on his bearded face, was singing to a Hendrix lick. He was one of the many street performers on Princeton's campus and looked to be about forty years old.

You could change it to"
The vintage looking fender telecaster dangling around his neck caught my eye; I looked up and into the face of the man with _______ (description)
I was often told to stay away from strangers but this time, I couldnt resist.

You could try making your intro more active to win more attention.
good luck!
read mine as well? :)
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