Writing Feedback / My way of life and my parents way of life [NEW]

Compare and contrast your way of life with that of your parents which way of life do you.

From my point of view; there are uncountable differences between my way of life and my parents'. Each generation have different view of life. For instance they have different life styles, they listen different kinds of musics, they have different clothing way...etc. These dissimilarities change generation to generation and we all notice this situation. Especially in my country there is a huge evolution between my generation and my parents.

First of all; technology play a very important role in our lives. It was also exist in my parents life but not as much as developed as in my life. In my parents era there were no tv and they were reaching all sort of news from the radio. Furthermore they had to do many daily works by their hands, so they were making much more efforts with these daily works. For instance; they were working in the field by hands not by machines, they were washing the dishes by hand. On the contrary i use my computer to use every kinf of information and i use every kind of technological machine to do my daily works, so i spend my time for my personal development or for different kind of things.

In addition; religion is very efficient and essential in my parents life. I also believe god but it doesnt spread over all of my life. Especially my peers dont believe anything. They are more rationalist and they believe in science. My parents almost do every necessities of our religion such as praying, dieting. In my opinion, religion effects every part of life particularly way of thinking, way of deciphering bad and good things happening in our lives.

Last but not least; my life is more independent and free. They lived with the very sitrict rules but they did not put in force in to my life. I can travel by myself and study or work in another country while it was a dream for family. I can decide for myself and for my future. But in that way they were also decide for their future jobs by theirselves since their mothers and fathers more inexperienced compared to them. Individualizm is more spread out in my peers and become a trend between us.

Despite all of these differences; i never stop taking their advices. It could be an unreasonable behavour not to benefit from their life experiences. We have a good relationship and both sides listen and benefit from each other about getting new informations. Therefore i feel myself lucky for being with such a wonderful family.

Writing Feedback / CAMBRIDGE TOPIC; The widespread use of the Internet [7]

Hi everyone, please comment on my piece of writing.:)

The widespread use of the Internet has given people access to information on a level never experienced before. How does this increase in the availability of information influence life in today's world?

From my point of view the widespread use of the internet has had a tremendous impact on people's lives. Without a doubt, this innovation brings us wide range of knowledge which is very essential for our lives. Thanks to the internet we have an opportunity to reach every sort of information in a very short time, so new generations will be more developed and skilled.

First of all; internet has so many contributions for the students' educational developments. Beginning from primary school to the university all students have an access to all kind of information from science to math to languages. For instance, i started using internet more often at university for my researches to improve myself, so i benefited from internet and i still continue to use it.

In addition; people have a chance to facilitate their works by using internet such as, we can arrange our vacation more easy by using internet. We can make hotel reservations, buy our tickets, get information about the place where we go. For instance; i had no idea about Amalfi Coast in İtaly before two weeks ago but i heard it from tv and decided to visit that city, so I google it get any kind of information about the place and make my resevations as well.

Last but not least; internet provide people to communicate in several ways and make their connections stronger. Skype, messenger and some friendship sites not only provide people to make new friends but also supply them to meet with their old friends from other countries even from other continents. For instance; i studied abroad and i get so many friends when i was in that country for two years ago. Now i still keep my relationships by mailing and calling, so i go to visit them and they come to visit me.

In conclusion; of course there are some disadvantages of the internet, but the reasons i have mentioned above are very essential for our lives and everybody benefits from these opportunieties. In fact; i feel myself very lucky owing to the fact that i have lived in that internet and information age.

Please correct my essay in terms of grammar, vocabulary, cohesion, and task fulfillment. As always every help is appreciated!

Writing Feedback / CAMBRIDGE ESSAY; Good teachers set challenging tasks for their students. [2]

This is a Cambridge Essay Topic.
Hi everyone!! I am preparing for the ibt. I am not good at writing.. either in my own language
Could you please check my essay and tell your opinions about it?
Thank you very much

Good teachers set challenging tasks for their students. Do you agree or disagree with this idea?

We are living in a fast changing world, where the knowledge is the most important treasure. The majority of people acquire a substantial amount of notions. Fot this argument, teachers display a very crucial role in our lives. Teachers decide for syllabus at schools. Experiences which i gained from my life show me that good teachers set challenging tasks for their students.

First of all, challenging tasks in one's education life from primary school to university have a very important role. In this case, students, instead of memorizing pure knowledge from the text book, they experience them in some ways. And this kind of tasks provide students permanent knowledge.

Besides, permanent knowledge, they improve their personal skills. These tasks make students more creative and intellectual. They improve their thinking skills. In the world of globalization, people who have different skills from others, stand one step ahead. Since, everyone have the theorical knowledge and get decent educations but not have the ability of creative thinking. Creative thinking can be progress by doing different kind of exercises at school for several years.

Last but not least, these projects or studies give students confidence to face with a competetive world. Children should understant what they are going to face with after their educations. Since, the real world is so discrete from the students' life. People are raising with each other in their specialities. For instance; i made a presentation of performances, happening in my school conferance room, in front of very importat people when i was 15 years old. I were reluctant to take this duty since i was so shy to speak in front of such crowd. But after 15 years i had to do it for my company for much more crowd and this time i was willing to do it and it provide me advantage in my work career.

In conclusion, from my point of view, this kind of tasks; projects, homeworks, presentations support us to improve ourselves and contribute our personal development. We can become a more beneficial and influencial people fort he society in that way. Therefore, good teachers set challenging tasks for their

students.

Writing Feedback / Toefl Essay Topic: Telecommuting, working in an office? [4]

This is a Longman Essay Topic.
Hi everyone!! I am preparing for the toefl ibt. I am not good at writing.. either in my own language. I get maximum 20 point from writing sections and I can't impove it. Could you please check my essay and tell your opinions about it?

Thank you very much

Do you think telecommuting is more advantageous and common comparing to the working in an Office? Different people will give different responses to this question depending on their own characteristics, emotional concerns, personal experiences and even educational backgrounds. However, when it comes to me, I strongly believe that working in an office is more advantageous. There are several reasons for my perspective as follow in the next paragraphs.

The first and foremost reason is that telecommuting interrupt social relationships. Socialism is one of the most important thing in human life. Recently, our jobs cover our lives completely. After doing our duties, we have a very little time to do other things. Therefore, job hours are very essential for us and staying alone and without sharing anything to anyone is not healthy for human pyschology. Just as the English proverb goes, 'There are some people who have the opposite view and prefer not to have any relation and do his duities by himself.

In the second place, besides building up new relations at work, working in an Office provide you to join different kind of activities. Joining wine days or dinner organizations and going to sport centers, dance courses, concert organizations are the couple of examples of acting together. When you work isolated in your home, you could be aware about such kind of things.

Last but not least, working in an Office provide you best environment to get informations about your job and learn new progresses happening in your profficiency. In addition, you have a chance to discuss with your friends about one particular topic, and ask something that you have trouble at work to the experienced employees. Job environment presents you to help your collegeaus and getting help from your collegaues.

In conclusion, working in an Office is much more advantageous comparing to the telecommuting. The sense of helping someone who needs, joining activities with your colleagues, and socializing, getting friends are the some good ways what Office environment brings to us. Therefore, I prefer to work with my colleagues and benefit from these good ways.

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Writing Feedback / TOEFL ESSAY ; Course grades are based on exams or based more on class participation? [6]

This is a Longman Essay Topic.

Hi everyone!! I am preparing for the toefl ibt. I am not good at writing.. either in my own language. I get maximum 20 point from writing sections and I can't impove it. Could you please check my essay and tell your opinions about it?

Thank you very much

Every univesity have various policies about grading their students. Do you think should course grades are based solely on exams or as in other classes grades based more on class participation? Different people give different responses to this question depending on their own characteristics, emotional concerns, personal experiences and even educational backgrounds. However, when it comes to me, I strongly believe that course grades should based more on class participations. There are several reasons for my perspective as follow in the next paragraphs.

The first and foremost reason is that class participation provides students to get wider informations about their profficiency. Since professors not only explain informations existed in the book, but also share their own experiences about their profficiency. Comparing to the students who are not joining to the classes, other student have wider knowledge. Everything is written on the books and also internet provide everykind of information. But in this case why do we need universities? Every student can reach these informations. But students joining the classes are more advantegous. Besides, getting informations existed in books, they can benefit from the professors knowledge obtained from different sources and experiences.

Just as the English proverb goes, , ''there are two sides to every coin''. There are some people who take the opposite view and say that exam results show everything and are enough to demonstrate the students situation.

In the second place, class participation gives some clues about students situation to the professors. Educaters can notice how the student progress and how much differ from other students. Genarally proffesors give some dueties to the students to observe their behaviours and knowledges about the topic. For instance, professors demand to work together in the class from the students to see how they organize or demand to discuss a particular topic with each other. In this case, the professor have an idea about each student.

Last but not least, exam results can measure only the information existing in the books. In addition, students may not show their ability in the exams. They have to have more chances to show their abilities and successes. There are students failing in exams but successing in the practice. And in the real life practice is much more important then the pure knowledge.

In conlusion, course grades should'nt based solely on exams. For t he good education system class participation is very essential. Students performance at classes, professors observations and proffersors explanations are also crucial things which every student has to experience in their educational life.