Undergraduate / I built many castles in the air; Stanford Essay/ Experience [2]

Prompt: Stanford students possess an intellectual vitality. Reflect on an idea or experience that has been important to your intellectual development.

"If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost; that is where they should be. Now put the foundations under them." -Henry David Thoreau. The moment my English teacher introduced such a name into my life, I became enraptured. I knew, without a doubt, this is someone who I could identify with and I was caught- stuck in a web of such deep thought and reverie that it was impossible to escape. Nor did I want to wriggle free. Henry David Thoreau wished to "suck out all the marrow of life", to live deliberately and with cause. Which is precisely what I intend to do. I have built many castles in the air, each one magnificent in its own way, now all that is left is to make them touch the earth. Turn dreams into reality. "Our truest life is when we are in dreams awake," Henry Thoreau spoke to me with such depth that I wish to follow in a way that when I open my eyes one morning I realize that it is actuality that I am living in, not fantasy. I want to find substance, the marrow, and the inner workings of life and consume it. Live with purpose; be confident in my path and direction. Live the life I've always imagined, in my castle laid upon billowy wisps high in the air. "As a single footstep will not make a path on the earth, so a single thought will not make a pathway in the mind. To make a deep physical path, we walk again and again. To make a deep mental path, we must think over and over the kind of thoughts we wish to dominate our lives," Henry David Thoreau has enveloped me mind and soul- in words and in spirit. How can a single mind affect me with such an immensity, I wish to never know the answer, but remain influenced without question.

Undergraduate / She was once an object of adoration; Stanford / Person who has affected me [4]

Prompt that I chose: Explain an influence, person or other, who has affected you.

All I have ever known is fire. From the blaze that lives within my stomach, the scorch of the blistering tongues that lick my fingers, the golden glow that shimmers in my very eyes. I am encircled, constantly, by a ring of glistening heat and have adopted its many characteristics- though not all willful espousals. Analogous to fire, I have a thirst; however, this desire immeasurably surpasses that of a blazing light. I hunger for much more than merely oxygen; I crave success and yearn for achievement. I cannot extinguish the glittering flame that dances within me, nor do I wish to destroy such a fuel. This searing illumination was, conversely, not birthed from my own motives. It was a spark struck from that which birthed me.

She was once an object of adoration- an obsession to me, a comforting embrace, a helping hand, a provider of warmth. My light. As I grew, I watched her reduce to ashes- to mere coals barely alight. I observed the clouds appear, shrouding her in a ghostly darkness and dragging her further into the swallowing depths, as she weakly fought its pull. As my family fell apart, so did she, disintegrating into a fine, black dust -a scattered heap of charcoal or singed wood. I tried to ignore the incredible amount of sorrow that hung from her like chains and her own flame that flickered close to extinction, but it was impossible to miss the unbearable sight of her conflagration suddenly vanishing. Torturous it was, watching her desperately try to find any escape, just to feel the memory of heat- just to remember the sizzle of a condemned and ruined blaze.

She presses the bottle to her lips and feels the burning ache scorch her throat- the only feeling of fire that still remains. This act ignites my personal inferno. It raises the blistering combustions until my insides are charred and my teeth are clenched with the threat of releasing a scream. She is the reason I feel such an intensity- such a cataclysmic eruption within the complexities of my being. That day she let her light recede into a dead ember, was the moment that ignited a searing flash of radiance in me. I will never be so impassioned and fragile to let adversity wrap its clammy hands around my ankle and suck me down below the surface. I will not suffocate; I will roar with such a fire that despair will cower and tremble within such a scarring heat. I will consume and envelop all that opposes me, for I will do what she couldn't.

I will not wither away until I am but a murmur of what I once was. I will blister and scald all impediments, for it is my nature. My sweltering fervor will never be smothered. It will propel me forward with an immense wall of scorching flames that swelter and roast with a fiery trail of illumination-dazzling and splendid, always waiting for chances to devour.

Please help, people say its too complicated and doesn't reveal much.

Undergraduate / "I won't speak much at first"; Stanford Essay-Future Roommate [2]

Dear future roommate,
I won't speak much at first, but don't be offended. It is just how I am. Always assessing, calculating, adjusting. In shyness comes safety, something I've learned that I haven't decided whether it is factual or just in my mind. I am extremely hardworking and dedicated, so I hope you don't mind my light still shining into the late hours of the night. I promise you won't hear much except the rustling of pages and the scribbling of pens. If you ever need me you'll always be able to find me; I'll be in constant revolutions around the library and coffee shop.

I have some quirks that you may want to know about, such as the fact that I turn into a kleptomaniac when I see cute clothes, but hypocritically hate when people use my stuff. I read uncontrollably which worries me that people think of me as boring. I am also a perfectionist, so if you see me getting unreasonably frustrated it is because I am irrationally hard on myself. I have some weird studying techniques so I hope it doesn't bother you when I sing the material or dance around to relieve stress. I also have a tendency to play Claude Debussy and other classical favorites while I'm writing. I have found that it helps my writer's block immensely. I also am consistently cold and will be almost attached to my electric blanket and fuzzy socks. I am a little obsessive compulsive when it comes to hygiene and appreciate my bathroom and shower time, however long it may be.

I am extremely indecisive but know that what I want to do is make a difference. To make something of myself and to live a life I have always imagined where all goals are reachable.

Don't know where to take it. My mind is so dead. I'm such a procrastinator. Help please.

Undergraduate / I come from a small town in Oregon ; Stanford- Letter to Roommate [12]

Prompt: Write a letter to your future roommate telling about yourself...yada...yada

Dear future roommate,
I come from a small town in Oregon where clouds outnumber the population- most of the year it's dreary and never ceases to produce rain, drop upon drop. All that's left of the sun is in memories of my childhood, recollections of the scorching Arizona desert. This, of course, is why I'm so pale. I miss the sun much like a fish would pine for the sea after it has been stripped of its watery home. I have, however, become accustomed to such mournful weather that the sun is as far away in thought as it is in location. This place of little opportunity is like a sink hole, a sort of purgatory or limbo. Most fall into complacency and never leave, others try to leave but fail and become even more trapped than before. I, on the other hand, wasn't meant for this place. I am meant for much more, I am meant to break free. I have found solace in you, future friend, for you will be a welcomed hand on my journey.

I'll never know what makes people settle, but what I do know is that I do not have that capability. I know this next step will be much more like a great big leap but if we make it together I know we will not falter. My legs are strong and my footing is sure, I cannot be diverted from the success I am bound to achieve. "Some people live in cages with bars built from their own fears and doubts. Some people live in cages with bars built from other people's fears and doubts; their parents, their friends, their brothers and sisters, their families. Some people live in cages with bars built from the choices others made for them, the circumstances other people imposed upon them. And some people break free." â€- C. JoyBell C.

I cannot wait to escape the confines of this place and stretch my limbs, to share a new chapter of my life with you.
The palest girl you've ever met,
Hannah Dowdy