AnnieLZY
Jul 31, 2017
Writing Feedback / IELTS Task1 - Land degradation (Cambridge 8 Test 1) [4]
@Holt
Thanks very much! I'll work on that.
@Holt
Thanks very much! I'll work on that.
AnnieLZY
Jul 31, 2017
Writing Feedback / IELTS Task1 - Land degradation (Cambridge 8 Test 1) [4]
The pie chart below shows the main reasons why agricultural land becomes less productive. The table shows how these causes affected three regions of the world during the 1990s. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparison where relevant.
The chart illustrates the causes of global farmland degradation. The diagram gives information about how North America, Europe and Oceania were influenced by these causes in the 1990s.
The over-exploitation of land is the major reason for degradation of farmland, with over-grazing and over-cultivation accounting for 35% and 28% respectively. A further 30% of degradation was due to tree clearance, while other reasons are only responsible for the remaining 7%.
Among the three regions in question, Europe suffered the most. It had as much as 23% degraded land, in which 9.8% were caused by deforestation, followed by over-cultivation(7.7%) and over-grazing(5.5%). For Oceania, over-grazing constituted 11.3% in its 13% of total land degraded, leaving only 1.7% for deforestation. North America had a lower degree of land degradation at 5%, with 3.3% caused by over-cultivation and 1.5% by over-grazing.
Overall. The different causes of land degradation had a largely varying impact on different regions. The main culprit in Oceania was over-grazing, while North America and Europe suffered the most from over-cultivation and deforestation respectively.
The pie chart below shows the main reasons why agricultural land becomes less productive. The table shows how these causes affected three regions of the world during the 1990s. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparison where relevant.
global farmland degradation and its consequences
The chart illustrates the causes of global farmland degradation. The diagram gives information about how North America, Europe and Oceania were influenced by these causes in the 1990s.
The over-exploitation of land is the major reason for degradation of farmland, with over-grazing and over-cultivation accounting for 35% and 28% respectively. A further 30% of degradation was due to tree clearance, while other reasons are only responsible for the remaining 7%.
Among the three regions in question, Europe suffered the most. It had as much as 23% degraded land, in which 9.8% were caused by deforestation, followed by over-cultivation(7.7%) and over-grazing(5.5%). For Oceania, over-grazing constituted 11.3% in its 13% of total land degraded, leaving only 1.7% for deforestation. North America had a lower degree of land degradation at 5%, with 3.3% caused by over-cultivation and 1.5% by over-grazing.
Overall. The different causes of land degradation had a largely varying impact on different regions. The main culprit in Oceania was over-grazing, while North America and Europe suffered the most from over-cultivation and deforestation respectively.
Book_8_Test_1_Task.jpg
AnnieLZY
Jul 31, 2017
Writing Feedback / [IELTS]Some people think that children should be studying all the mandatory subjects [7]
Hi Karen, there are some grammar mistakes in your essay and I've corrected a few. Remember to proofread your essay in the exam if you have time, as too much grammar or spelling mistakes will let you lose marks.
... as geography, theydon'twill not even know the geography of their own country
In summary, compared to selecting the favorite subjects, studying mandatory provides more opportunities for ...
Hi Karen, there are some grammar mistakes in your essay and I've corrected a few. Remember to proofread your essay in the exam if you have time, as too much grammar or spelling mistakes will let you lose marks.
... as geography, they
In summary, compared to selecting the favorite subjects, studying mandatory provides more opportunities for ...
AnnieLZY
Jul 31, 2017
Writing Feedback / My most unforgettable meal [4]
... exchange activity withthe students of therelocal students during this summer.
Although I can eat something spicy,but every bites of ...
The worst isWhat's worse, the air condition ...
... exchange activity with
Although I can eat something spicy,
AnnieLZY
Jul 27, 2017
Writing Feedback / IELTS Task 2 - Throwing away things [2]
Prompt: These days many of us prefer to throw damaged things away, whereas in the past people used to repair damaged items and keep them for a long time. Explain why you think this change has happened. What are the effects of this change in attitude?
In current days, when something is broken, most people simply throw it away and buy a new one. Decades ago, however, it would be fixed and used for a longer time. There are various reasons for this change, and it seems to me that the effects are largely negative.
In my opinion, this phenomenon is caused by economic and social changes. Firstly, the increase in disposable income over the years has enabled individuals to afford new commodity. Meanwhile, the prices of goods have been dramatically reduced, thanks to scale production and cheaper man-made material such as plastics and nylon. With the availability of relatively inexpensive products, less people would bother to wait for hours or even days to have things repaired, especially in the modern society where the pace of living is incredibly fast.
This change in attitude has produced harmful consequences. On the one hand, a huge amount of waste is generated every day, with a large portion that cannot be reused or recycled. Some of them go to the landfills while others are burnt away, causing soil and air contamination. On the other hand, factories are producing new products at their full capacity to feed the growing need, depleting scarce resources. Waste pollution and resource exploitation might eventually lead us to a deadly environmental crisis.
In summary, it is true that instead of using the repaired old item, most people would rather replace it with a new one. It is determined by economic and social changes, and its threatening effect on the environment should warrant concern.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Thanks for your correction!
Prompt: These days many of us prefer to throw damaged things away, whereas in the past people used to repair damaged items and keep them for a long time. Explain why you think this change has happened. What are the effects of this change in attitude?
the trend of buying new things instead of repairing old ones
In current days, when something is broken, most people simply throw it away and buy a new one. Decades ago, however, it would be fixed and used for a longer time. There are various reasons for this change, and it seems to me that the effects are largely negative.
In my opinion, this phenomenon is caused by economic and social changes. Firstly, the increase in disposable income over the years has enabled individuals to afford new commodity. Meanwhile, the prices of goods have been dramatically reduced, thanks to scale production and cheaper man-made material such as plastics and nylon. With the availability of relatively inexpensive products, less people would bother to wait for hours or even days to have things repaired, especially in the modern society where the pace of living is incredibly fast.
This change in attitude has produced harmful consequences. On the one hand, a huge amount of waste is generated every day, with a large portion that cannot be reused or recycled. Some of them go to the landfills while others are burnt away, causing soil and air contamination. On the other hand, factories are producing new products at their full capacity to feed the growing need, depleting scarce resources. Waste pollution and resource exploitation might eventually lead us to a deadly environmental crisis.
In summary, it is true that instead of using the repaired old item, most people would rather replace it with a new one. It is determined by economic and social changes, and its threatening effect on the environment should warrant concern.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Thanks for your correction!
AnnieLZY
Jul 27, 2017
Writing Feedback / Good and bad punishment of children - essay (IELTS) [5]
... is essential for children,. In addition, ...
... learn about morality,. Additionally, ...
("In addition" and "Additionally" are used at the beginning of a sentence, and they should be separated from the previous sentence.)
InOn the other hand, (...) and he can learn by themselves.
... is essential for children
... learn about morality
("In addition" and "Additionally" are used at the beginning of a sentence, and they should be separated from the previous sentence.)
AnnieLZY
Jul 27, 2017
Writing Feedback / IELTS WRITING TASK 2 - TRANSPORT REGULATIONS - road system [4]
@ghazali
In sSome metropolitan cities (...) Beijing, have a huge number of people population.
InOn the other hand, all roads canshould be (...) and all drivers of vehicle.
Your structure is clear but there are some grammar mistakes that makes the essay difficult to understand. I suggest using some grammar checking and proofreading websites first, for example 1checker or grammarly
@ghazali
Your structure is clear but there are some grammar mistakes that makes the essay difficult to understand. I suggest using some grammar checking and proofreading websites first, for example 1checker or grammarly
AnnieLZY
Jul 26, 2017
Writing Feedback / IELTS Task 2 - Effect of International Fast Food [4]
Prompt: In many countries, traditional foods are being replaced by international fast foods. This is having a negative effect on both families and societies. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
In the last decade, fast food giants such as McDonald's and Subway have started their invasion to an increasing number of cities and towns. While hamburgers and chips become a frequent choice for modern citizens, I firmly hold the opinion that the damaging effect of international fast food on individuals and society on the whole cannot be overlooked.
It is claimed that fast food undermines people's well-being by overlooking nutrition values. To produce a flavor that raises customers' appetites, the restaurants usually use a shocking amount of salt, oil and sugar, which might encourage diseases such as diabetes or obesity. What is worse, there have been breaking news exposed over the years saying the meat of fried chicken wings comes from genetically modified monsters that have six wings and eight legs. Whether it is true or not, the credibility of food resource in some restaurants is very limited.
Moreover, the spreading of international fast food makes cultural diversities fade away. The emergence of local food is due to the geographical traits of that place and the dietary habits of residents. Therefore, it symbolizes the culture and traditions to a large extent. If one day, sushi and spaghetti were all replaced by hamburgers and hot dogs, people would regret about the gross loss of cultural identities.
The time-saving fast food, however, might be more suitable to the high-paced modern society. The streamline-prepared food can be served to the customers in less than one minutes. In addition, the dining time also shrinks since people can finish their meal while walking or working.
To sum up, even though fast food saves a lot of time for modern citizens, their harmful influence on nutrition values and cultural conservation cannot be ignored. While the trend of frequenting fast food restaurants seems inevitable, traditional food should at least have a place on the dining table.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Thanks for the correction!
Prompt: In many countries, traditional foods are being replaced by international fast foods. This is having a negative effect on both families and societies. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
harmful services of fast food giants such as McDonald and Subway
In the last decade, fast food giants such as McDonald's and Subway have started their invasion to an increasing number of cities and towns. While hamburgers and chips become a frequent choice for modern citizens, I firmly hold the opinion that the damaging effect of international fast food on individuals and society on the whole cannot be overlooked.
It is claimed that fast food undermines people's well-being by overlooking nutrition values. To produce a flavor that raises customers' appetites, the restaurants usually use a shocking amount of salt, oil and sugar, which might encourage diseases such as diabetes or obesity. What is worse, there have been breaking news exposed over the years saying the meat of fried chicken wings comes from genetically modified monsters that have six wings and eight legs. Whether it is true or not, the credibility of food resource in some restaurants is very limited.
Moreover, the spreading of international fast food makes cultural diversities fade away. The emergence of local food is due to the geographical traits of that place and the dietary habits of residents. Therefore, it symbolizes the culture and traditions to a large extent. If one day, sushi and spaghetti were all replaced by hamburgers and hot dogs, people would regret about the gross loss of cultural identities.
The time-saving fast food, however, might be more suitable to the high-paced modern society. The streamline-prepared food can be served to the customers in less than one minutes. In addition, the dining time also shrinks since people can finish their meal while walking or working.
To sum up, even though fast food saves a lot of time for modern citizens, their harmful influence on nutrition values and cultural conservation cannot be ignored. While the trend of frequenting fast food restaurants seems inevitable, traditional food should at least have a place on the dining table.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Thanks for the correction!