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Posts by sandyhsu [Suspended]
Name: Hsu Yu Shin
Joined: Jun 23, 2019
Last Post: Feb 22, 2020
Threads: 3
Posts: 5  
From: Taiwan
School: Taipei Medical University

Displayed posts: 8
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Feb 22, 2020
Writing Feedback / IELTS 2: education on junk food overconsumption. Discuss both views and provide your own opinion. [3]

Food standards in education

Scientists agree that many people eat too much junk food and it is damaging their health. Some people think that this problem can be solved by educating people, while others believe that education will not work. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In recent years, there are a large number of people having obsessed with junk food, therefore, researchers believe that this phenomenon will result in health problems. Although some people argue that such issues can be addressed through education, others hold opposite perspective on it. In this essay, I will breakdown both thoughts and state my own view.

Advocates state that inculcating consumers with healthy dietary style is undoubtedly the best solution because of raising concerns on nutritional values. It is their view that a large proportion of customers ignores the fact that these unhealthy food is invariably high in sugar and salt. Nonetheless, with modest education, understanding the consequences of consuming an excessive amount of junk food can help them realise the importance of forming a wholesome dietary habit. As a result, they believe that consumers will ultimately alter their diet patterns by decreasing the frequencies of purchasing such merchandise or increasing the intake of greenery vegetables.

However, opponents think that it is impossible to reduce individual's addiction to junk food merely by education. They believe that the vast majority of consumers clearly know the detrimental effects on health, however, because of its convenience and low cost, they cannot help being a slave to such products. In addition, they also insist that education will only have negligible effects if related national policies do not regulate the advertisements and promotions on junk food. For instance, government can pose higher taxations on these products and limit the content of junk food advertising, so that fewer customers will be attracted by relatively low prices and appealing marketing strategies.

In conclusion, although education plays a significant role in ceasing people from overconsuming junk food, I firmly believe that it is inevitably never enough to resolve the issues. Concreted efforts should also be executed by national administrations.
Feb 22, 2020
Writing Feedback / Self Study Ielts Task 1: Population for different type of turtles in India from 1980 to 2012 [4]

... the number of varied turtle types various species of turtle in India ...

Overall, it is evident that, during the given 32 years period since 1980, there was a ... Olive Ridley Turtles in contrast, Olive Ridley Turtles increased ...

your overview is a bit loose, you can try to use some linking words ex: while, whereas
Feb 22, 2020
Writing Feedback / Newspapers information is more reputable and trusted than the news on the internet [3]

1.need to avoid using contraction such as don't, can't ,etc. ----> use "do not" "can not"
2.try to use alternative words as many as possible:
newspaper---> physical one (compared to the internet), printed publication, physical publication
information---> knowledge, messages, daily updates
Feb 18, 2020
Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK2: THE IMPACT OF THE INTERNET, POSITIVE OR NEGATIVE? Communication and quick information. [4]

the evolution of communication and information searching methods

The internet has dramatically altered our lives over the past few decades. Although some of these changes have been negative, the overall effect of this technology has been positive. What are your opinion on this?

As technology has become well-developed, the internet has brought numerous convenience to our lives. Although some people argue that these alterations will have detrimental effects, I believe that the benefits of such invention far outweigh its drawbacks. In this essay, there are two main reasons that I will explain why I think this way.

One advantage is that internet has revolutionised the way of communication. In the past, mail deliveries needed to rely on postmen and citizens had to wait for a couple of days before receiving mails, not to mention the messages sent from abroad. In modern times, however, with various online chat applications (such as WhatsApp, Line, etc.) being developed, residents are available to communicate immediately. In addition, internet has diminished the impact of geographical distance. This significantly helps people who suffer from long-distance relationships to keep their updates and feel a sense of affection without any delays through either online messages or video chats.

Obtaining a vast amount of information within few minutes is another benefit of the internet. Hundreds of thousands online resources can be easily assessed at a click of a button rather than wasting a substantial period of time on searching library shelves. Admittedly, a few educationalists will argue that not all of online information is reliable as some may have inappropriate and misunderstanding content. Nonetheless, I truly think that if we know how to identify and select suitable online materials , it undoubtedly results in saving more time and efforts.

In conclusion, as I stated above, I firmly believe that the internet have had more positive impacts on our lives. This is because of its influence on the evolution of communication and information searching methods, leading to a cost-effective and advantageous society.
Feb 18, 2020
Writing Feedback / Wrting task 2 - Foreign students in English-Speaking countries to learn English [4]

1.Introduction part may need to be brief, so that you can reduce the word count.
2.you don't have to give practical example in the introduction part , you can use general words to conclude(ex: There are mainly two reason that I will explain why I think this way.)

3.practice talking English with tourists from English speaking-countries & studying in the Internetcan be your main idea of topic sentence in Para2&3 (also need to be short and clear)
Jun 23, 2019
Writing Feedback / Animal experiments to develop new medicines and to test the safety of other products [3]

Nowadays animal experiments are widely used to develop new medicines and to test the safety of other products. Some people argue that these experiments should be banned because it is morally wrong to cause animals to suffer, while others are in favour of them because of their benefits to humanity.Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Controversy of Animal Testing

It has been argued for years whether animal experiments are beneficial to humanity or if it is unacceptable that animals will suffer pains from it. In my opinion, I firmly believe that we should limit animal testing and try to use more humane tests as alternative methods.

On the one hand, it is true that animal testing made a major contribution to the drug invention. There are more similar living systems to human beings which are easier to obtain the biochemistry data and predict the toxicity of the drug. However, with the advent of well-developed technology, we can also use cell-based tests and establish a online human-liked module to access a great amount of information as well as predict the patterns. For example, IBM Watson is an AI-based platform which can help scientist to predict the efficiency of the drug by collecting a substantial number of clinical databases and calculating the possibility of the treatment via artificial intelligence, which not only can reduce the demand of animal testing but also can obtain the data efficiently.

On the other hand, animals were usually subjected to force feeding, food and water deprivation and prolonged period of physical restraint which were considered as inhumane and unacceptable. we should not overlook the lives of animals because I believe that every creature has their own values and cannot be used as a tool for any purposes. In addition, animal testing is not always accurate enough and sometimes it will be unavailable to human beings due to the complex organism of human body.

To conclude, it is inevitable that scientists test on animals for medical purposes, however, we can figure out an alternatives to it as the technology has become much more advance than ever, then, animals do not have to lose their lives and suffer pains anymore.