Undergraduate / Tufts - Who Am I? (Indeed - who!?) [3]

I wouldn't suggest starting out the response as you did, it is pretty cliche and generic. Other than that I think its fine although I would suggest you try to incorporate something about voice into it since the prompt asks what voice you will add, maybe rearrange the paragraph and elaborate on your voice lessons or something. I also find the last sentence to be a bit disconnected from the rest of the paragraph. Maybe I'm missing some connection, but I think those nouns should connect more with what you state previously.

As for your question on the length, I got two different responses. When I checked Tufts' website it says 200 words or less, but when I emailed the admissions office with the same question my answer was that I could go over a little bit and finish my thoughts. I think if you cut the beginning out entirely, or down a bit, you should be fine.

Undergraduate / Tufts Self-identity [7]

I'm pretty sure you can use the dashes, it adds emphasis to what you are saying, as well as provides more detail, which is what I read following a quick Google search...gotta love the internet. Also a colon followed by a dash just seems awkward. I don't write thinking about mechanics, I just write by feel and the colon dash combo feels awkward, hard to explain.

Undergraduate / I am a conglomerate of different experiences and walks of life; Tufts - NEIGHBORHOOD [9]

"I am a person that is inspired by the struggling musician from Berklee..."

I though you should also vary your sentence structure up a bit in the Quaker saying one. You have 3 sentences all starting with "I am", and while you may be striving for this repetition I don't think it works. To make it less generic you could try concentrating on one specific event in your neighborhood instead of just touching on several, since while everyone knows Tufts is all about diversity, you need to show more than the fact that you had tea with your Indian neighbors...just a thought. Best of luck, I submitted mine a couple of days ago, 2 hours 39 minutes to go...

Undergraduate / Tufts Self-identity [7]

"I am an amalgamation of different thoughts and interests and opinions. Diversity, idealism, and passion-put them in the people-processor machine and whoop! Out pops _______, ready to take her place in Tufts, Class of 2014."

should that period be a dash instead? this is nit picky part of writing is not my forte, but it just doesn't seem to flow as nicely as the rest of the paragraph. other than that I found it very interesting, much better than mine. 3 more hours to go till you have to hit submit, so best of luck.

Undergraduate / My parents allow me to express myself as an individual; Tufts-'Let your life speak.' [12]

Ohokay. I wasn't sure if you meant chalk or something..my bad...but sounds like a fun festival. Good luck with your apps. Who knows, maybe I'll see you at Tufts.

Undergraduate / 'I have three very close friends'; an ethical dilemma that challenged you. [6]

shared my crazy ideas, etc.
I wouldn't use "etc."

possition
one s

It's
Just write out "it is", contractions shouldn't be in formal writing (unlike this post...)

"I said I could explain to them everything if they had doubts or problems understanding the class. But they did not listen to me and continued doing the same."

make this one sentence ", but"

"Then I try changing my position during the exams, and I sat in a place far from them. But it did not work either because they got mad at me and they kept cheating with other classmates. "

try should be "tried". the "but" thing same as before. I don't think you really cheat "with" other people, rather you cheat off of them.

"I gave them another opportunity: "
period not colon.

"I said: "If this continues,..."
comma not colon.

"...them , and because I love them."
no need for the and.

"I really hope so!"
I don't think this is necessary.

It's a good start, but you need to make it more interesting to the reader. You can do this through making it flow better. Hope that helps.

Undergraduate / My parents allow me to express myself as an individual; Tufts-'Let your life speak.' [12]

Thanks for your advice on my Tufts supplement...

"Always adventurous, my friends and I would often cycle around the neighborhood or go boating in the nearby Sankey tank. When we celebrated festivals in the neighborhood, we would share our colors or crackers with the street children and even grew to be friends with some of them."

What do you mean by colors? Not really criticism, just wondering.

"I have been exposed to Indian stereotypes such as this my entire life. I have been lucky enough to be born into a relatively liberal family and to have attended two liberal, non traditional schools. I have always tried to break these stereotypes and continue my endeavor."

Were you going for the parallelism here? I think it works, but if you weren't I would suggest changing up the beginning of your sentences

"Either follow us on your horse, or wait here for hours for our return."
Is this a direct quote? If you paraphrased it or something along those lines I would change up the ending "..or wait here for hours for our return." the double use of "for" irks me...can't really explain it.

Undergraduate / "Albert Einstein got it wrong countless times", George Washington Univ Essay [15]

cool, thanks. I was just curious. Never really learned a lot about Einstein. and I assume someone has already called out the OP for plagiarism so there really isn't anything else to say.

Undergraduate / "Albert Einstein got it wrong countless times", George Washington Univ Essay [15]

This isn't really criticism but just a question...Did Einstein make as many mistakes as you imply in your intro? I read the first line and did not think of Einstein, but Thomas Edison and the creation of the light bulb rather than Enstein's theory of relativity. Just my opinion, hope the EF moderators dont call me out on "meaningless criticism" for this one.

Undergraduate / Common App Short Answer-"the Dream of Caterpillar" [3]

the numbers "4" and "12" should be written out as "four" and "twelve"

you also need to work on your verbs tenses such as: "...and only 4 students including me, who has passion..."
"has" should be "had". Also in that sentence "me" should be changed to "myself"

I sense that English is not your first language so you need to watch out for literal translations: "Meeting the feeling of something hot in my heart from the drama performance..." I have no idea what you are trying to say here.

It's a good start, but you need to work on making it flow.

Undergraduate / My extracurricular essay about Ballroom dancing [2]

Overall the theme and writing is good.

The first sentence seems awkward to me, perhaps the comma there is unnecessary. Also, while this is more of an opinion on my part, I feel that the sentence "The teachings of ballroom dance have also left the dance floor..." could be stated in a way that helps the paragraph flow better.

Undergraduate / 'New ways / The Getaway' -Tufts University - Why Tufts? & Short Story [13]

^^ I don't think you have the room to add any more to any of these essays, if anything you need to cut them down since the word limits are 50/200/200 words for each essay respectively.

Student Talk / Word count limits and restrictions in essays [44]

Word limits - Tutfs Supplement Essays

The Tufts essays state:

I. REQUIRED SHORT ANSWER (50 words)

Which aspects of Tufts' curriculum or undergraduate experience prompt your application? In short: ''Why Tufts?''

but then allots 500 characters for use,

while the two longer ones say (200 words), but allow 2000 characters for use. Does this mean that the essays must be at least 50/200 words long with that amount of space available, or are they supposed to be under the number of words stated?

and sorry if this is in the wrong "forum" I can't get to the main screen for some reason to see all the different boards.

Undergraduate / "got a call announcing that I had the job" - common app short answer-activity [10]

"Instead, I dropped by every cafe in the town with copies of my resume and expounded upon the irrationality of age barrier ..."
That is awkward, but I think it could be fixed just by including the word "an"

Undergraduate / 'No reason I needed these classed' - An experience in which I left my comfort zone [3]

I am a terrible proof reader, but I did notice some grammatical errors:

"I felt so uncomfortable leaving the classroom, and sometime I would just pretend to forgot to go see my ESL teacher." - This needs to be rewritten. Sometime should be sometimes and forgot should be forget. and should also be changed to "that" IMO, not sure though.