Writing Feedback / a clear understanding of oneself can be a great driving force to one's ultimate goal [NEW]

Does the perception of our potential determines whether we can accomplish our goals?

Everyone has his or her own potential that is imperative to be excavated. One's understanding of what he can and can't do is vital for him to accomplish his goal. Therefore, the keen perception of one's potential, no matter from other's discovery or self-discovery, is able to build up self -confidence that can impel him to strive for his goals. Through the personal experience of Jack Welch and John Nash, I see my standpoints explicit.

Jack Welch, the CEO of an Electricity company, developed his own perception of his potential with the help of his mom. Jack suffered from severe stutter since he was a kid and this physical deficiency always shad shame on himself; therefore, Jack neither talked often nor did he have any confidence with himself. Hence, Jack couldn't see himself acute enough and discover his potential. However, Jack's mom had always been a great remedy to Jack because it was she who encouraged Jack all the time. She discovered that his son had an uncommon intellect, just as she put later in her life, "It's because you are so smart. No one's tongue could keep up with a brain as fast as yours." Jack's mother encouragement had built him strong self-confidence and he firmly believed in his inherent talents. As Jack said, "Stuttering has never bothered me because my mom filled me with all self-confidence- she just poured it in". Therefore, Jack's mom successfully built Jack a keen self-understanding of his potential which was most responsible for his later success. With a clear perception of his intelligence, Jack joined General Electricity, climbing up his position step by step. The owner of General Electricity saw the innate talents that Jack possessed, promoting Jack swiftly and eventually, Jack became the CEO of General Electricity. Jack's perception of his intelligence became a major driving force that helps him achieve his goal as the most successful business man.

Another exemplary individual who recognized his potential and became successful is John Nash. John showed great aptitude in math since he was a kid and he didn't fully recognize his potential in math until he got accepted by Carnegie Institute Of Technology in which he was greatly encouraged by a professor named Synge. Synge discovered the great potential John possessed to be a math specialist and he strongly boosted Nash's self-confidence.

Later, John got accepted by Princeton University in which he devoted his time to "Nash Equilibrium", a masterpiece of his mind. "Nash Equilibrium" was greatly recognized and laid the foundation for Game theory later on. After gaining great understanding of his ability in math and his natural talents, John started to defy the theory of Adam Smith. After years and years of studying without forfeiting, John successfully developed his Game Theory and poked a hole in the long-standing idea of Adam Smith. John ultimately achieved his goal with the nomination of Nobel Price of Economic Science. John gained an acute perception of his intelligent with both the encouragement of his professor and the achievement of himself; he accomplished successfully in the arena of economics and ultimately achieved his goal.

Therefore, through the examples of Jack Welch and John Nash, the idea of forming a perception about one's potential become rather vital. Jack formed a perception of his intellect with the help of his mother and he became the most successful businessman. Similarly, John Nash formed the idea that he's gotten uncommon talents in mathematics which urged him to accomplish successfully in math and math-related economics. All in all, with a clear understanding of oneself can be a great driving force to one's ultimate goal.

Writing Feedback / To better the society off, people need to watch over the decisions that their leaders are making. [3]

Topic: Is it important to question the ideas and decisions of people in position of authority?
Society advances when people begin to realize things around them are misguided by certain authority figures and begin to point those errors out. In western civilization, the sovereignty of the pope of the church, the monarch of an empire was irresistible and couldn't be challenged. Common people were intimidated of questioning the authority even those people in position made erroneous decisions. However, it is always important for people to point out the misleading because sometimes society progresses when things are getting questioned.

The pope of the church has always held supreme power as he was regard as the messenger of God. Galileo, an influential scientist, boldly challenged the church's long-standing geocentric teaching. He claimed that it was not the earth but the sun that was the center of the universe. Pope Urban VIII condemned Galileo and demanded him to recant; nonetheless, Galileo firmly believed in his new discovery and refused to surrender to the pope. As it is shown in Galileo's action, one can conclude that questioning the ideas of people in position of authority could benefit the human society. Did Galileo not stand out to forward heliocentric belief, ignorant people would still be trapped under the mistaken influence of the church.

Galileo's remark on the church was centuries ahead when French people began to question their king in rein. The French Revolution led the long term effect that it might exert on the whole nation. French people, suppressed by the extravagant and luxury monarchy for too long, finally roused up against their king Louis XVI. The king's sovereignty had always been believed to be unchallengeable yet people realized that they couldn't sustain themselves under the false rule of the king so they turned up against him. The decision the French people made was influential since they successfully turned over the tide that aristocracy and bourgeoisie would lead the rule. French society went forward after that move; therefore, questioning the authority may be a better way for the nation to proceed on.

As the conclusion can be drawn from the above examples, I believe in profundity that how important it is to question the person in position of authority. To better the society off, people need to watch over the decisions that their leaders are making. As soon as the erroneous, injustice and flawed ruling was made, people should have their say courageously and fearlessly to win over what is best for them.

Writing Feedback / Is creative needed more than ever in the world today? [4]

The following context is my essay. It is my SAT writing practice; can someone score it?Thanks.
Nowadays, the incessant innovation and creation of the society are marching with great speed. Tracing back to the ancient world when the First Industrial Revolution comes into being, marking the commencement of the era of creation in mankind's history, people begin to aware of the importance of creation. Hundreds of years later, in the modern society, creation becomes one of the few things that the world today needs more of, no matter in technology or environment.

Since the first computer invented during the Second World War 1940, computer becomes the most popular devise which human have ever made. With the mature of computer technology, the Internet is of the essential. Google, Firefox, Yahoo, MSN, and other search engines alike gradually pile up, the competition among them growing vigorously. In order to be lucrative, these companies are trying by all means to create something different from others and attract the costumers' attention. For instance, Google has a creative idea to identify and solve the problem of assessing the quality of search results by using the number of links pointing to a page as an indicator of the number of people who find the page valuable. Therefore, Google's search results became far more accurate and reliable than those from other companies, and now Google's dominance in the field of Internet search is almost absolute. In short, the creative ideas in technology can help industry make more money in the market competition.

In this industrialized and globalized society, environment issue raises people's attention. Ever since the First and Second industrial Revolution, people were using coals and other fossil fuels more often. However, the over nonrenewable fuels excavating not only diminish the amount of these valuable sources, but also severely destroy the environment. In the world today, to create a new "Green" world with better environment condition, people develop the new ideas which are moving towards the use of solar energy, wind, water and other non-pollution, clean and safe natural energy. Creative is become more and more necessary not only for these environments but also most importantly, for human beings themselves.

In conclusion, in modern society, creative is needed more than ever. The world is no longer a new- born infant; it is becoming stronger and stronger day by day. Thus, more and more innovation and creation are required in the modern world than before; with new perceptions and ideas, people can utilize this world more easily and exploit its full potential.

Undergraduate / A time that I overcome problems: From Pakistan to America [3]

A time that I overcome problems
During one's lifetime, one will encounter so many problems, which we should overcome. Only when we dash over these problems we are able to grow up.

Tracing back to three months ago, when I just came to America, I couldn't adjust myself to life surrounding me. The new environment, new people and new language are all unfamiliar to me at all, so they took me a long time to get accustomed to that. Under great pressure from both my parents' aspiration and my own motivation, I gradually became puzzled. I was always asking myself whether it is worthwhile for me and my whole family to come here at the cost of so much. These problems confused me until I read an article from the newspaper which was about a boy named Iqbal Masih.

He was from a remote town from Pakistan, and was sold to a carpet factory by his parents at 4 years of age. He was forced to do as much manual work as he could. Without enough nutrition and sleep, he was skinny and short. Let us suppose you are locked in a gloomy and damp loom, how will you feel about your life? Sucks? However, this boy was locked up in the carpet factory for almost 6 years, and he wasn't desperate. After escaping from the 'jail' at the age of 10, he was freed by an organization defending children labor. He gave out a lot of speeches about children labor all around the world. To our disappointment, he was killed only two years after receiving freedom-at the age of 12.

The little boy's life experience shocked me a lot. I began to reflect on my negative thoughts about my new life in USA. Comparing my life to his, I feel that I am so weak. He never gave up and struggled for life until the last moment of his lifetime. He didn't complain about what God gave him, instead, he cherished every moment in his life.

"No pain, no gains," this little boy inspires me never to give up. He helps me overcome the shadows in my life and gives me my philosophy about me life "Life can never be smooth; it's for you to determine".

Writing Feedback / pleasure and satisfaction: the pursuit of our desires or the attainment of them? [4]

What gives us more pleasure and satisfaction: the pursuit of our desires or the attainment of them?
During one's lifetime, your desires always give you motivation to do better. The pursuit of your desires can never be smooth; however, when you finally attain them after weathering the storm, you will find that your process of pursuing them makes you even happier than the attainment of them.

A principle figure in music factory concerns Djingo, a guitar player. Djingo started playing the guitar at thirteen years of age, and showed a great talent. By the age of eighteen, he had already gained enough practical skills and was regarded as a professional. He has a dream that he will be a renowned guitar player some day. However, he was no more than a professional until he was 20 when an event suddenly occurred that forever changed his life style and sealed his fate.

One day, holding a birthday cake, Djingo together with his family was celebrating a birthday party. Unexpectedly, the wick that fell out of the candle ignited the highly flammable plastic furrows at home; In just a minute, the whole house was on fire. Fortunately, Djingo wasn't burnt to death, but one of his legs was amputated and his left hand was severely crippled with three of his five fingers no longer in function. With such a heavy loss, Djingo didn't give up. Though for a guitar player hands are the most important things, he still strived to accomplish his musical dream. After recovery, he was still involved in practice, and even harder. He found a new method of playing the guitar with only two fingers. Eventually, Djingo succeeded. He was famous not only for his distinguished guitar playing skill, but also for his perseverance. He was treated as a jazz pioneer. In his pursuing for his desire, Djingo devoted much more than you can imagine. Now, for him, no matter whether he was considered as a noted guitar player or not; his pursuit of his desire is most important to him, because it is his desire that gives him strength for life. Recalling his experience of attaining his dream, Djingo feels it gives him much more satisfaction and pleasure because it is the cultivation of tears, sweats and blood.

Life is like a rolling mountain; we step forward to pursue our desires on the other side of the mountain. During the process, we will encounter rifts, thorns and those lurking dangers; however, when we finally land on the other side of the mountain and accomplish our pursuit, the joyfulness of success will be more memorable than simply the attainment of them.

Writing Feedback / What must we do to truly understand ourselves? [4]

Can someone check my essay please....I will really really appreciate that
Eyes -what a miracle part in one's body. It is able to see everything; however, it can't see oneself without the help of the mirror. Similarly, one is able to judge others' traits or characteristics in one's own point of view, but one can't truly understand oneself without the meeting of another personality.

The prominent writer of the 19th century concerns Jan Austin who published a superior novel entitled Pride and prejudice. In the book, the two main characters Elizabeth and Darcy were depicted vividly. Jan Austin characterized Elizabeth as a country girl holding deep prejudice against Mr. Darcy, an aristocrat with great fortune, but pride on himself. These two young people narrowly missing (missed)the other part of their lives due to their defect in personalities. They met each other in the prom during which the pride of Darcy irritated Elizabeth a lot, so her bias against Darcy came into being. At first, Mr. Darcy simply regarded her as a country girl with lower social statue (status)than him; however, he was gradually attracted by her wisdom and her unique traits, so he fell for her. When he asked for Elisabeth's permission of marrying him, surprisingly, she refused without a moment of hesitation. Because in Elizabeth's conversation with Mr. Wickham, a hypocritical general, she was told that Darcy destroyed his future and her sister's happiness. After several twists and turns, Elizabeth gradually understood Darcy, feeling shameful for her prejudice against him, and Darcy noticed his pride had truly hurt Elizabeth's self-respect. They understood each other after the collision between their personalities.

A far-reaching novel Christmas Carol written by Charles Dickens was about a greedy and brutal miser Scrooge who met three demons in(on a) Christmas night. The three demons each represented past, present and future. They showed Scrooge if one paid too much attention to money, one would deserve bad consequences. Scrooge was afraid. The following day, Scrooge utterly turned into another person for he decided to do something benevolent. He asked a boy to fetch a turkey for him in order to give this present to one of his faculty, an old man who worked for him dedicatedly but he hadn't treated him well. He even gave the little boy money, which never happened heretofore. Scrooge truly understood himself inspired by the three demons and determined to be a kind and generous man instead of being mean.

Overall, During our lifetime, only when two personalities meet each other can one find the defects in one's characteristic, begin to understand oneself and try to ameliorate one's traits.