Undergraduate / "Journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step" - highschool experience [4]

In the space provided, please write a concise narrative in which you describe a meaningful event, experience or accomplishment in your life and how it will affect your college experience or your contribution to the UF campus community. You may want to reflect on your ideas about student responsibility, academic integrity, campus citizenship or a call to service.

Lao Tzu, a Chinese Taoist Philosopher, once said, "The journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step." Stepping out of my mom's car, approaching the grey, fenced, colossal building where I'd be spending my next four years of schooling was over-whelming. But step by step, mile by mile, overcoming obstacles, and conquering my fears I'd be able to reach the light at the end of the tunnel.

Mile marker 25 - 9th grade, English 1, quarter essays worth twenty-five grades, I just didn't know what to do anymore. The first two quarters, the essays caused my grade to drop drastically. Awaiting my third quarter grade, the same product turned out. The teacher never explained her grading. As an immature 9th grader, looking for the result of my recent constant failure, I complained. The last quarter essay was one of your choice, ready to give it all I had, sat down, took at my two sharpened pencils and wiped the sweat off my face. Awaiting my result, the teacher stood in the front of the class and said, "I was very disappointed in this class, no one put forth their full potential, except one, Elias Davis, achieving the only A."

Mile marker 350 - I was embarrassed, wearing a short little speedo that exposed my pail legs, thought everyone was going to laugh at me. As a beginner, I was placed on the B-team, where all the rookie swimmers were. Within a few days, I was the fastest throughout the novices, able to move on to the big league, where the fastest swimmer was going to be in the next Olympics. Month after month my legs got stronger, my strokes improved, and practice had perfected all my skills in the water. District championships was just two weeks off, and the pressure to get my times to make the cuts boiled my thoughts with fear. There was only one more spot open, my event, the 200 freestyle individual event, but there was another kid that did it at the same time as me. So who would get the spot? Who would end up going to district championships and who would end up staying home? A time trial race was the only way to find out who had a faster time. The next day at practice coach Ann called Evan, the other kid competing for the spot, and I. Adjusting goggles, stepping onto the block, the coach stood behind our blocks and screamed, "on your marks, get set, go." Ranked in the top ten from thirty swimmers in my event, Morgan Markman, a senior swimmer on my team, cheering me on as I finished, "Good job Eli, amazing performance."

Life is like a tunnel with an illuminating light that engraves the feeling of accomplishment, with over occurring obstacles that need to be surpassed to reach one's eternal goal. Those feelings of accomplishment are inscribed in the day-to-day life I live, continuing the things I do, to someday reach the light at the end of the tunnel.

I WROTE IT THINKING ABOUT A PROMPT TOPIC TALKING ABOUT AN EXPERIANCE SO I GUESS IT COULD BE THIS ONE~! I HAVENT TOUCHED ANYTHING ABOUT UF YET THOUGH! KEEEPP THAT IN MINDDD< PLEASE HELP ME OUT AND CHECK MY OTHER TWO ESSAYS OUTTTT!THANKYOUUU

Undergraduate / "After my fathers death..." - Inspiration essay - UF [4]

In the space provided, please write a concise narrative in which you describe a meaningful event, experience or accomplishment in your life and how it will affect your college experience or your contribution to the UF campus community. You may want to reflect on your ideas about student responsibility, academic integrity, campus citizenship or a call to service.

Standing next in line, the passing of the microphone continued. The spotlight was on me, hundreds of people stared while Ms. Peck handed me my kindergarten graduation diploma. She then crouched down to ask me a single question. So Elias what do you want to be when you grow up? Completely sure of my answer, I quickly answered, "a doctor, just like my daddy."

Throughout the course of time, my dad lived day-by-day helping the people around him. As an infectious disease specialist, he diagnosed people that were on the urge of death. Saving as many lives a day as he could was his goal, which is why he inspired me.

My father was a man that had problems as well. Titled "obese" by todays society and with a list of diseases that included heart disease and diabetes my father had to be careful with what he ate and how much he ingested. Gone through many procedures like catheterizations successfully, on the way to the hospital at 4:27 a.m. July 24, 2010, I thought it was just going to be another efficient procedure.

After 33 minutes of constant doses of medication, the doctor walked into the waiting room where my family and I sat. "We tried everything we could, but he didn't make it" said the doctor; within that moment, my life had drastically changed. Tears dripped down everyone's faces as well as mine, but now with nothing left to do, my brother and I had to be strong for the rest of the family. My strongest memory that pulses my mind everyday were the three words he told me the night before, for your heart.

After my fathers death, I dedicated my free time to start learning about what I dreamed to study in my near future: medicine. As my life passion, I continued watching, reading, and listening to the various chalk talks that included information of what my future held. With the multiple years ahead of me, but with the multiple hours of research, I feel that the "Gator nation" has everything and more available to conquer and achieve my passion: cardiology. To help cure and treat the disease that killed my inspiration, my father.

Undergraduate / Inspirational person essay - Common App (directed for Johns Hopkins) [3]

ANY CRITICISM AND/OR HELP ADJUSTING THE ACTUAL ESSAY WILL GREATLY BE ACCEPTED! IM NOT REALLY FOCUSED ON GRAMMATICAL MISTAKES, I WANT SPECIFIC HELP ON THE ESSAY CONTEXT AND IF THE PROMPT TOPIC CONCORDS WITH THE CONTEXT

COMMON APPLICATION (100+ schools including Harvard accept this application) Discuss in 250-500 words one of the following:
1. Evaluate a significant experience or achievement that has special meaning to you.
2. Discuss some issue of personal, local, national, or international concern and its importance to you.
3. Indicate a person who has had a significant influence on you, and describe that influence.
4. Describe a character in fiction, an historical figure, or a creative work (as in art, music, science, etc.) that has had an influence on you, and explain that influence.

It was a windy, cold December night when my mom was rushed to the emergency room, and later to the operation room, to welcome two more babies into the world. Subsequently, after the incision I was pulled out, cleaned, and laid in my father's hands. Even though it was not the first time my father was going to be a dad, the smile on his face illuminated a sense of pride and happiness that spread throughout the entire hospital.

Throughout my life my father has taught me more than just a few manners and words of wisdom, but to help the people around one before oneself. I can remember the first time I saw my father give money to a homeless man. It struck me because out of the many people that passed by him as if he was just another common sight, my father was one of the handful of people to stop and help him. Since then, I would always notice that when we would pass by a homeless person, the first thing my dad would do was take some money out of his pocket and offer it, even if it was the last he had.

In the year 1991, my dad graduated medical school from the Universidad Nacional Mayor de San Marcos in Lima, Peru. His goal in life, and only way that he would have a smile on his face, was compelling to everybody's needs around him. As a doctor, his everyday job consisted of helping others medically and emotionally. He worked with dedication, from diagnosing a woman's upset stomach to sewing a child's cracked head caused by youthful mischief.

My dad was not only the usual playful, exciting dad. My dad was always worried about my grades and achievement in grade school, always aspiring for my siblings and I to achieve the unachievable and reach for the stars.

On July 24, 2010, at 4 A.M., my sister rushed into my room shaking. The few words I understood from her quivering mumbles consisted of the words 'dad' and 'ambulance.' By the time I ran to the other side of the house, where my parents slept, all I saw was my mom sitting on the bed crying, hysterical, looking for car keys to rush to the hospital. My brother was gone by then. After multiple doses of different type of medication, my father never reacted.

At the age of 48, due to a heart attack, my father passed. The person that once shined the world with his smile, the person that taught me manners and terms of respect, the person that taught me to reach for the unreachable, and the person that made me who I am today, was gone. Gone physically, but never gone spiritually.

With everything he taught me, with everything he showed me, and with everything he gave me, I will live on his teaching and beliefs today, wanting and willing to help the people around me, just like he did.