Writing Feedback / People attend colleges and universities: education, new friendships and relationships [NEW]

Hey guys, it is me again. I just have another paragraph written out, and am hoping if someone will kindly give me some criticisms. Thank you!

People attend college or university for many different reasons. Those reasons, which are very common, are pursuing a higher education, creating a larger social network, and finding a love relationship; they often are the major factors in a person's future development, both mentally and physically. Therefore, I think the primary reasons that people attend colleges or universities are their interest in the higher level of educations, forming new friendships and love relationships.

Without a doubt, post secondary provides a higher level of education than high school. As many jobs in the world today require employees to have at least some post secondary educations, more and more high school graduates are applying to colleges and universities every year. Those students and employers often believe post secondary education is necessary to a person's success in today's ever advancing and competing world; those who lack the education will quickly fall behind in the competition. This is why many students are enrolling in colleges or universities.

Other the pursuit of knowledge, the ability to increase one's social network is also a very attractive reason for post secondary's admission. Colleges and universities provide excellent opportunities to meet many new people during your education. As your social circle expands, it will become useful in the future, especially in job hunting. In our society today, employers are now pickier than ever with job applicants; not only you need to fulfill the job requirement, but it is also essential that you have some recommendations from someone who has witnessed your ability. Friends that you made in college may have seen your ability, and they can give a good recommendation of you to your potential employers to effectively increase your chance of being hired. Therefore, social networking skill is essential in our world and hence many people go to college just to expand their social circles.

Finally, dating is also a popular reason why people go to college. Many of the people that go to colleges and universities are in their early 20s, which is the time when most people are being sexually matured and are starting to consider a relationship. Because there are many students walking around on campus every day, there will be more opportunities to meet someone that you are romantically interested in, which can increase the chances of finding a date. In addition to that, school provides a more relaxing environment compares to work, so both partners will have more time to spend with one another, making dating more fun and exciting. Hence, many people attend post-secondaries with the purpose of finding a relationship.

As you can see, the main three reasons why people attend post-secondaries are knowledge, social network, and dating. The combination of knowledge and social network is a very powerful asset in today's job market and it is one of the main reasons for high enrollment of students in post-secondaries. Dating, as far as we know, is much more relaxed and easier when we are at colleges and universities because there will be more opportunities for meeting a date, and dating will be more fun and more relax.

Writing Feedback / Are we free to make our own decision, or are we limited in the choices we make [3]

Hi, it's me again. Just doing my regularly writing practice. I have absorbed the suggestions from people in this forum, and hope I can get more insightful inputs. Thank you!

Please note you will be banned the next time you post useless comments in other students' thread just to be able to open a new thread.

Our mind is not as free as we think it is. We might think we can make our decisions freely, but ironically, our decisions are often the reflection of the opinions from others, the situation we are in, and the social status we have. Therefore, due to the people around us, our situation, and our society, we are limited in the choices we make.

The people around us can limit the choices we have. People that are close to us, such as our parents and friends, often limit the choice we have in our life. For instance, parents can limit our education options by pressuring us to study the subjects they want, and friends can affect our decisions through peer pressuring. Moreover, if we insist on not following their actions, we may be discriminated and isolated by them. Therefore, parents and friends are among the people that will affect our decisions.

Other than people, our situations can also affect our decisions. Imagine a person who is trying to buy a vehicle, and his choice of vehicle is usually reflecting on his financial situation; he might want to buy a brand new vehicle, and he would do so if his financial situation permits, but if not, he would have to settle for a second-handed vehicle, which would be a cheaper alternative. At the end, whether he will choose a new or a used car, this person are making this decision base on the financial situation he is in, and not what his mind is telling him. This is a good example to show that our decisions are affected by our situations.

Moreover, our society plays a role in limiting our choices. Even though we are safe to express our thoughts freely in Canada, people in some countries are forbidden to do so. Those countries are usually controlled by corrupted governments that heavily prohibit the freedom of speech. The Locals who try to express their opinions about the governments' actions will be accused of treasons, and be sentence into prison or to death penalty. As a result, the locals who are well aware of the corruption inside the government system are too afraid to speak up and stand against the governments. With this, the governments will have full control over the choices their people have.

In summary, our decisions are not entirely our own. We must keep in mind that every time we make a decision, there are many factors that affect it, such as the opinions from families and friends, the situations we are at, and the structure of our society.

Writing Feedback / Destruction of the world's forests amounts to death of the world we currently know. [3]

I am trying to improve my writing ability, so I will be writing quite a few essay to get some opinion from you guys. Be as criticizing as possible, I can take it!!!!! Criticism is the catalyst to improvement! Thank you!

Forests are important to our Ecosystem. They account for the majority of oxygen's production on Earth, and they are also homes and food source to many animals. Without a doubt, the destruction of forests will diminish our oxygen production, and the lives of many animals. Therefore, due to the forests roles in majority of the earth's oxygen production and being home for many animals, the destruction of forests will definitely causes the death of our world.

Oxygen is an essential element in keeping living organism alive, and majority of its production comes from forests. Plants inside forests produce oxygen through photosynthesis - a combination of chemical reactions that coverts carbon dioxide into oxygen. But if this production is diminished, there will certainly be a rapid decline in the amount of oxygen on Earth, and this can potentially wipe out many organisms on Earth. Therefore, the destruction of forests will make it extremely difficult for many oxygen dependent organisms to thrive.

Forests are also home to many animals. Forests provide secure shelter and food source for many animals to thrive on Earth. Because of the resources forests provide, those animals can flourish and reproduce, thus balancing the ecosystem. However, upon the destruction of forests, many animals will be forcefully evicted from their homes, and this process can result in extinction of many species. As many species of animals depend on other species to survive, the extinction of one species can create a chain of extinction among other species, which can devastate the Earth's ecosystem. At the end, the collapsing of the ecosystem will turn the Earth into a lifeless planet.

In summary, the destruction of forests directly impacts life on Earth. The majority production of oxygen on Earth will be tampered by the destruction of forests, as well as the balance of the ecosystem. Without Forests, Earth will become nothing but a former shadow of her vigorous self.

Writing Feedback / Education brings up more job opportunities for those who are educated. [7]

Just want some feedback on my writing.. thank you.

Education, without a doubt, can affect a person's future. Many job opportunities are opened for those who are more educated. A good education will not only bring talented students into the country, but also increase our life styles. Education is definitely one of the most important factors in the development of a country because it opens up job opportunities, brings up more talented individuals into the country, and increases our living styles.

Many job opportunities are opened up because of education. A proper education teaches people skills and knowledge they will need in their careers. As people become more educated, more job opportunities will be opened to the educated individuals who process the qualifications to succeed in those jobs. Therefore, education serves a key to unlock job opportunities.

A good education will also attach many talented individuals into the country. For instance, there are many foreign students choosing to study in Canada every year. They explain that for studying in Canada of is because the education system in here is better than back home. After finishing their degree, many of those students choose to stay in Canada because they are attracted by the job opportunities in Canada than back home. Hence, a good education will attract talented individuals into the country.

Education also increases our life styles. As we know more and more about our living surrounding, we can now make a choice for a better life style. For example, through education, we now understand that some common household products or insulation, such as asbestos, can cause cancer. Since then, we have switched to a safer and healthier alternative; a step towards a better and healthier life styles.

In summary, education is one of the most important factors in the development of a country. Education brings up more job opportunities for those who are educated. A good education in the country can attract foreign students to study abroad and work in the country. Also, education increases our awareness of dangerous substances in our living surrounding, thus we will choose a safer and healthier alternatives, promoting a healthier and better life style.

Writing Feedback / How to fund community recreational services (increase taxes?) [4]

Hi, I am not looking for someone to edit my work, but are looking for inputs and comments. I am writing the ACT test and I want to see where I am at. Thank you

Topic:
Are user fees or increased taxes the more appropriate way to provide for community recreational services?

"The best way to pay for community recreational services" has been an ongoing debate among politicians. They have different point of view as to who - taxpayers or users - should pay for the usage of those community and recreational services. I believe the community recreational services should be paid by their users, as it is not fair for the non-users, and the increased taxes will negatively impact the economy of the community.

It is only fair for the general public that the cost of the community recreational services is paid by the users. Increasing taxes affects taxpayers, including those who do use and do not use the community and recreational services. To the user, it might be fair to them, but what about the non-users? For the non-users, it is extremely unfair to them, as they would be responsible for providing services deemed useless to them, and they also would be indirectly paying for the users. Moreover, those increased taxes should be spent elsewhere that impacts everyone, such as health care, food supply or transportation. Therefore, it is only fair to charge the only the users of the community recreational services.

Aside from being unfair to the people who don't use those services, increased taxes will negatively impact the economy of the community. Devastated by the financial crisis couple years ago, our economy is still in her recovery period, and many people wish the government can provide assistance to boost the economy. As the economy is recovering, many people are getting out of financial distress, but the increased taxes will be slowing the economy's recovering period and putting many people back in financial distress. On the other hand, if the users are charged for their usage, it is the appropriate way to provide for community recreational services without endangering the economy, because the users have the options to reduce their usage based on their financial situations; whereas once the taxes are increased, you have to pay for it even if you do not use community recreational services.

In summary, the cost of the community recreational services should be paid by the users. Increasing taxes is not the appropriate way to provide for community recreational services because it is unfair to people that don't use the services, and it adds extra financial burden to people that are currently suffering from financial crisis, and negatively impacting the economy.