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Posts by alexh983
Joined: Oct 27, 2012
Last Post: Dec 27, 2012
Threads: -
Posts: 9  
From: Canada

Displayed posts: 9
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alexh983   
Dec 27, 2012
Undergraduate / Art for Little Hearts/ Common App on ECA [2]

i think it is a good topic, but it is missing you in it. the party where you takl about food tasting and expenditures seems rather irrelevant. i think it might help if you talk more about what it meant to you personally and how you really helped push it through.
alexh983   
Dec 26, 2012
Undergraduate / The most prestigious; BU supp/ "Why Boston University" [4]

first off, I would take out your second use of "presitigious". it sounds a little repetitive.
Its a good essay, but it almost feels slightly generic. you kind of just list all the things you like but I think you should try to make it a little more flowing and cohesive. try to put a little more of how boston will help you and why you need it.
alexh983   
Oct 27, 2012
Undergraduate / 'top-notch liberal arts education' - Vassar Supplement Essay [3]

"Vassar's allowing students' high level of academic freedom"
try to reword the beginning of this phrase- it sounds a little awkward in its current state. maybe something more along the lines of "Vassar's allowance of a broad range of academic freedom for its students" would flow a little better.
alexh983   
Oct 27, 2012
Undergraduate / 'nothing is guaranteed' - Villanova Supplement [3]

I think you should try to add more about the lesson part of this besides that there is a limit. It does not sound very personal right now and is rather negative.
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