Scholarship / Trying new things/ Skating; Leadership based SCHOLARSHIP/ Experience [2]

Prompt: Describe one memorable event or experience which provided you with a new outlook on life.

This is for a leadership-based scholarship, does this essay work well with the concept of leadership or no?
It's okay as far as content goes, but is my message coming across to you?

Please correct any mistakes THANK YOU

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Zip lining, talent shows, and rock-climbing: ideas that would have been completely alien to my old self, but nothing new to my new self. I used to think that my goal in life was to focus on the things I'm good at and to excel at them. I rarely ventured out of my little bubble, my safe haven. "Will I look dumb trying this if I have never done so before?" goes the question that echoed in my mind whenever I was faced with something new. However, I came upon an astounding revelation: I was afraid of trying new things for fear of making mistakes and looking dumb. I suppose this affects everybody to some extent but my revelation made me realize that I was not living life to its fullest extent. I mean, what's life without some mistakes to learn from? A dull one, that's what. It was not so much that I needed to make more mistakes, but rather that I gain more from this heck of an exciting world. How would I know what I'm good at if I don't try it out? This revelation changed my outlook on life. This all came about one very special day: December 27, 2010.

It was a cloudless winter day, and the white snow covered the ground for as far as the eye could see. Cheeks red from the cold and smiling from ear to ear, I was skating at an outdoor rink with my good friend from elementary school. She had called me the night before, inviting me and telling me about the skates her uncle had given her for Christmas. Even though she had only skated once or twice in the entirety of her life, she was totally willing to give it a shot. "Sure!" I told her, "I love skating." Taking her first couple of shaky steps on the ice, she flailed her arms trying to keep up upright. Barely able to contain my laughter, I guffawed when she went down and landed on her bum. Not looking embarrassed nor sheepish at all, I found her grinning up at me. She came up laughing, and continued to skate. After another four or five falls, I was becoming amused by the number of looks she was getting. With a wave of her hand, she laughed and said, "let them look all they want, I'm going to fall enough that I'll never fall again! I'll be a world-renowned skater." And so, infected by her undeniable cheerfulness, I fell with her. We laughed and giggled all the way through. I did not care that I was falling and that I was looking foolish. It was winter break! And that's when it hit me. Why couldn't I have this attitude all the time?

My friend reminded me of the care free and easy-going nature of my childhood. I spent days playing with mud, climbing trees, and going on adventures with my brother. Nothing was quite like it. I had absolutely no care in the world. I made mistakes, I fell a lot, I got my clothes dirty, but I was enjoying life way too much to worry about these petty details. I realized that this was my true self. It had gotten locked away inside me because of the stress of wanting to meet the high expectations of everyone around me; my family, my peers, my teachers. My friend gave me the encouragement to stay true to myself, to make mistakes and not be scared of the outcome. She has restored my sense of adventure, my fearlessness and my desire to try new things. My originally straight path has now branched into so many more possibilities because I realize, by trying new things, I could be so much more. I know now that I cannot let mistakes deter me from living the full potential of my life. I learned that mistakes are to be treasured, because they can tell me a lot about myself and I can improve based on these mistakes.

Albeit I still don't welcome mistakes with open arms, they no longer have such great control over me. I learned to appreciate my mistakes; I learn from them, I laugh at them and I certainly do not shy away from them like a panicked bat caught in the sunlight. Live, love, laugh. That's my motto. You only live once, after all.

Scholarship / I Took a Risk - I joined the Cross Country Team SCHOLARSHIP [2]

Prompt: Describe a time you challenged yourself by taking on a task/project you felt was beyond your scope and capability at the time. Why did you do it?

What happened?

Thank you! I would appreciate any input :)
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When I joined cross country in the ninth grade, all I had in mind were the intentions of joining a team I had never joined before, stick with it for the four years of high school and grow together with it. However, before then, I had never done any running-related competitions, save for the occasional lap or two in middle school gym class. I wasn't sure what to expect, and sure enough, I almost passed out from exhaustion during and after the first practice of a merely 20 minute run. But in a way, I liked it because I felt that I was able to challenge myself physically in a way that I have never done before. I wanted to improve, become faster and run alongside the fastest runners on the team. And so, still being one of the slowest people on the team, I continued to attend practices. Over time, I found myself gradually noticing changes in my body's physique. My legs became more toned from all the workouts we did, and there were less panting involved and more controlled breathing. Although I still couldn't keep up with the leads, I never gave up. The one thing I never allowed myself to do was stop, no matter how tired I was. I permitted myself to slow down, if necessary, but never stop because cross country was all about the endurance. As the season went on, I found that I wasn't the slowest at all. The summer of that grade, I really put my foot down and became determined to run everyday to improve. And so I did. I ran with the fastest boy on the team and my brother. We always ran long runs of 40 minutes or more in the wooded area by the school. After two years of training, I became a captain and a role model for the younger runners. I have never regretted my decision to join the cross-country team.

Essays / What does it mean to be well-educated? Book smart vs. Street smart [5]

Prompt: what does it mean to be well-educated?

I feel like this response is kind of going in loops. I guess it does answer the question, but I'm wondering if it answers it thoroughly enough?

Thank y'all in advance! :D

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She spent all her days in the library, and now she's completed her Master's degree with top notch marks! Is she well-educated? Maybe, but not quite. He dropped out of college halfway through but with that cunning mouth of his, he can get himself into anywhere! Is he well-educated? Perhaps, but not really. The term 'well-educated' is really quite amorphous, and the meaning tends to shift quite a bit from decade to decade. Back in the 19th century, well-educated meant having the right etiquette to behave correctly in all situations, including speaking multiple languages to greet foreign guests. In modern day 21st century, being well-educated is certainly affiliated with the achievement of numerous degrees and certificates. It's as if the word well-educated is having an identity crisis! What does it mean, really? It's a matter of street-smart vs. book smart. The typical Victorian lady may be well-mannered and all, but she really doesn't have the necessary knowledge to survive a real crisis. As for the book smart guy, when it comes to asking a girl out on a date, he's clueless! Now I may be exaggerating a bit but what I'm trying to say is that well-educated person needs to be well-rounded, a mixture of both street smart AND book smart. This person is sociable, can think outside of a textbook yet can also benefit from textbook knowledge. Eureka! That there, madames and monssieurs, is what I call a well-educated individual.

Undergraduate / Doctor Who; COMMON APP/ Act of folly [6]

Hi all! This is pretty rough so any input would be greatly appreciated :) You can be harsh, I can take it.

I did make a reference to Doctor Who as I am quite a fanatic :P But I really am not sure, so your honest opinions please! Does it draw you in or does it backfire?

What verbs can I use to replace "says"?
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"Sail of the century, reduce the Earth to molten slabs and sell it piece by piece. There's a recession out there, Doctor, people are buying cheap. This rock becomes raw fuel", says the Raxacoricofallapatorian Blon. "At the cost of 5 billion lives", says the Doctor. "Bargain", Blon grins. "I give you a choice. Leave this planet, or I'll stop you", threatens the Doctor. Blon sneers in disbelief. Of course, the Doctor ultimately outwits the bug-eyed alien and reduces it to no more than a harmless egg. Each of Blon's foolish acts tops the previous and this amasses to what I call: sheer folly. First of all, she should know better. The Doctor is not to be joked around with, being a Time Lord and all. The second - her parents, whoever they are, must not have brought her up right, as she is completely willing to make money (for herself, mind you) at the expense of five billion humans! That requires an utter and complete lack of good sense. Insane even. Someone who hurts others around him (or it, you never know) solely for the purpose of personal benefit is what I consider to be THE act of folly. They step on others to get ahead but really, they are backstabbing themselves because who would want to support the person that stepped on them on the way up? I wouldn't, that's for sure. Albeit the competition gets fierce sometimes, I would never resort to hurting others (and 5 million at that, too!) in order to benefit myself. It goes against everything I believe in. Again, two words: sheer folly.

Undergraduate / I am defined by my inquisitiveness - SUPPLEMENT [6]

WOW - I'm just bowled over by all of the great essays on this forum!

Anyway this is really kind of rough so any input (grammatical..etc) from you guys would be much appreciated! If you have any essays for me to look at, I would gladly do so :)

The original question: what in your opinion defines you as you?

I found out from online that this question would be looked at first by fourth year students so I really tried to make it interesting. Although is it too much? Did I stray too much from the original question? How should I change it? Thank you so much! (the limit is 1500 characters by the way)

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There, the fleeting shadow of a dark ponytail. A laugh. A nod. Another question. The ponytail swings from side to side. This ponytail, sometimes long, sometimes short and even curly at times, always trailing behind the same girl, stargazing in her tiny pink overalls or attending conferences in a well-fitted blazer. Growing over the years and maturing, she never lost the sparkle of curiosity behind her eyes and the questions, always on the tip of her tongue. Daddy, how can fish breathe in water? Why does the Sun disappear at night? Her questions scattered through time and space. Mister, why does gravity not act on the satellites in space? The world spins around her, so full of kinks and twists. Always the first to ask, always wanting to understand the complex world around her. Quick flashes of memory: sitting in her mom's lap and pointing to the strange-looking animal on the TV screen. Holding a page of questions and asking her biology teacher about cellular respiration. As the legends say, she is what is known as: inquisitive. For sure, she is inquisitive, and she is me. For as long as I can remember, I have been asking questions. This inquisitiveness defines me as me and I am going to carry this trait for as long as I live. Who knows, maybe one day my questions will chance upon an astounding discovery...to be shared with the rest of you, of course!