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Posts by nida26
Name: Nida Dusturia
Joined: Mar 14, 2016
Last Post: Aug 18, 2016
Threads: 30
Posts: 19  
Likes: 5
From: Indonesia
School: Telkom University

Displayed posts: 49 / page 2 of 2
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nida26   
Mar 30, 2016
Writing Feedback / The most important value which employees should have is their performance during work not appearance [2]

Some organisations believe that their employees should dress smartly. Others value quality of work above appearance. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Dress is considerably pivotal for the labours to enhance their appearance at workplace. However, there are several arguments that the most important value which employees should have is their performance during work. Furthermore, I strongly believe that the quality of work is the most important part at work.

Appearance is remarkably lead role for the worker, particularly for public figures. This is because the functional of dress is to attract attention their viewers or their fans. For instance, several celebrities who always appear in the electronic media such as television should be smart to choose their dress. They have to attract the viewer's interest and to be a model for the societies as trendsetter fashion. Dress is also able to gain the status social of artists. There is tough competition among the celebrities. Thus, if they do not have a good dress, they cannot survive in entertainment industry and lots of societies will be humiliate those artists. Nevertheless, I believe that the way inhabitants dress is not as important as their quality of work.

On the other hand, lots of people believe that appearance is not really essential rather than work quality. If the employees do not have proficiency in their job, it will be useless even though they are quite good at fashion which they wear. Yet, there were some occupations which do not require their workers to dress formal clothes. For example, the mechanics do not need thinking regarding to their clothes. This is

because they only work with machines and oil which can cause their clothes dirty. There is no doubt that the labors are supposed to have the good quality of their work.

To sum up, although the workers should wear fashionable clothes to enhance their appearance, I strongly believe that the quality of work is more pivotal. Workplace where people do their job is as a determinant of their clothes.
nida26   
Mar 30, 2016
Writing Feedback / Some group of people complain and feel unsatisfied that government is wasting money on arts [5]

Hi. Miss Avini. Let me try to answer your question

This is the question:
Some people think that the government is wasting money on the arts and this money could be better spent elsewhere.
To what extent do you agree with this view?

In my view, you should answer the task response (agree/ disagree) at your introduction or first paragraph. Thus, the examiner will be know your position directly whether you agree or disagree with that statement. In the conclusion, you can also put agree/ disagree statement to clear up your position.

For example, if I get a agree/disagree question. Then, I will decide to choose agree position. I will write 3 statements agree :
1. In introduction (Thesis Statement)
2. (Option 1) First body: I will explain why I disagree. But, in the last sentence at first body, I will state that I agree with the statement.

(Option 2) Second Body: After I explain why I disagree at first body, then in the first sentence at second body, I will state that I agree

3. In conclusion


That's all for me, I hope it is helpful :)
Thank you
nida26   
Mar 30, 2016
Writing Feedback / The society's status is not able to be assessed just based on their dress [4]

Some people say that the clothes people wear are the most important indication of what they are like. Others, however, say that people should not be judged by the clother they wear. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

It is true that the way people dress is able to reflect their job in this modern era. However, some people argue that the clothes cannot be used to indicate their background. I strongly believe that society's status is not able to be assessed just based on their dress.

These days, clothes which are worn by society can reflect their occupation and personalities. The physical appearance is able to make several perceptions regarding to character of people's proficiency. For instance, the women who work at night club tend to wear sexy dresses. They obligated to wear several clothes which can attract the visitors' attention, particularly the men. In the fact that they are supposed to show the best appearance every night to their client thought they are forced or not. Nevertheless, I would argue that the fashion which people choose cannot be used to decide who they are like.

Appearance is not lead role to show people's fashion style. Sometimes, several people likely convenient to wear clothes which make them comfortable or they love, whether they wear it in the right place and the right time or not. For example, the inhabitants tend to use T-shirt everyday even though they are wealthy people. Other societies who do not recognize them will judge that they do not have much money to purchase several good clothes which can enhance their appearance. Thus, those societies have the wrong perception in judging a person. It is evident that dresses are not able to determine people's status.

To sum up, clothes can show lots of people's jobs. Yet, I personally believe that people cannot asses other humans just based on what they see. Truthfully, the society must know other people first, before they judge other inhabitants' behaviour and background,
nida26   
Mar 31, 2016
Writing Feedback / The subjects which should be studied by students [2]

Some people think that all university students should study whatever they like. Others believe that they should only be allowed to study subjects that will be useful in the future, such as those related to science and technology.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.


As it is commonly understood, the learners are supposed to study their passionate subject at university. However, there are several arguments that they should learn essential courses which are needed to be studied. I strongly believe that the students have to study particular subject which have tremendous opportunity in the future.

Every learner has different passions as they have a great deal of proficiency respectively. They will feel enjoy if they select the subject which they are interested, and the students will be more motivated to explore their ability. For instance, several students who have passion in the music will feel joy with something related the music. They will have high curiosity and try to find out some information regarding to their desire. As a result, they are able to enhance their skill, and it will be increased dramatically. There is no doubt that the students can learn more effectively about subject which they like at college. Nevertheless, I would argue that the learners should to study particular subjects which can be profitable in the future to get a great job.

Several students are supposed to learn important subjects which will be useful in their future job such as science and technology. In this modern era, the development of sophisticated technology is rise rapidly year-by-year. It is undeniable that students have to update and follow that advance technology to survive for their life in the future. Several years later have predicted that internet of things will become a trend in the whole world. Thus, industries will require some engineers and scientists to develop it. It is evident that, it will be a huge opportunity for the young generation to have good job.

To sum up, lots of people believe that students have to learn subject which they are love. Yet, I extremely agree that it is pivotal to some learners should study beneficial subject for their future. The students must be able to determine the best subject which they will take.
nida26   
Mar 31, 2016
Writing Feedback / All university students should study whatever they like [2]

Hi. You have a great essay. Let me give suggestion for your essay. Please correct me, if I am wrong.

[...] This is because the invention and infrastructure can attract investors to invest their shares to increaseencourage/ support establishment in order to gainget/ earn revenue for the country. For example, china, particularly shanghai, more than 17,000 studentstudents are assisted by financial support ...

As a result, shanghai is recognised as developing city thatwhich has more improved (...) to support inhabitant's activityactivities .

On the other hand, young generationgenerations who take a major (...) evolve their ability and runlearn(using "run" is inappropriate) their lesson more enjoy.[...] All in all, the subject that interest for people is dominantmain factor to be expert in ...

That's all for me, I hope it is helpful :)
Thank you
nida26   
Mar 31, 2016
Writing Feedback / Overall, the greatest sales of coffee were United Kingdom in 2004 and bananas in Switzerland [NEW]

The tables give information about sales of Fairtrade-labelled coffee and bananas in 1999 and 2004 in five European countries.

The tables illustrate the breakdown of the number of coffee and bananas sold and labelled with Fairtrade in five selected European countries in 1999 and 2004. Overall, the considerably greatest sales of coffee were United Kingdom in 2004. On the other hand, Switzerland became the largest country which has been selling a lot of bananas.

According to the data, United Kingdom was the biggest country succeeded to sell plenty of coffee at 20 million in 2004. This figure was remarkably higher than in 1999 at 1,5 million. Switzerland experienced only 3 million in the sales in 1999, and this number was twofold greater than in 2004. Interestingly, just under 2 million of coffee sold witnessed in Denmark, Belgium, and Sweden over 5-year period.

The greatest sales of bananas were Switzerland in 2004, and this figure was almost three times bigger than in 1999. Bananas sold in United Kingdom and Belgium saw 5,5 million and 4 million respectively in 2004. However, Sweden and Denmark experienced just under 2 million over following 5 years.




nida26   
Apr 4, 2016
Writing Feedback / Several museums have regulated a policy that the visitors are supposed to pay money for museum entra [2]

Many museums charge for admission while others are free. Do you think the advantages of charging people for admission to museums outweigh the disadvantages?

Over time, several museums have regulated a policy that the visitors are supposed to pay money for museum entrance whereas others are free. I extremely believe that charging visitors to enter the museums has much more benefits than drawback.

Entrance fee is able to reduce the number of guests who want to visit the museum. This is because a plenty of people tend to come to other places which has entry free. For instance, a town square has a greater figure of visitors than museums. In the town square, people can do more activities such as jogging, laughing together with friends, or others which they are not able to do at the museum. As a result, the museums will lack of visitors. Nevertheless, I certainly agree that this issue has more the merit than the demerit.

It is true that the visitors' convenience is really necessary for the museums. A lot of museums charges admission fee for their guests in order to develop the museum itself. They need several sources of money to provide and to fulfill their needs for maintaining valuable goods or facilities there. To illustrate, those money can be used to add air conditioner in each room and install cctv for their guests' safety and convenience. Thus, they are able to improve several facilities and the visitors would be more comfortable to visit the museums.

To sum up, entrance fee enable to reduce visitors' number of museums. However, I strongly believe that the benefit for charging visitors for museum entrance is greater than the drawback. Therefore, people have to realize that the money is used to provide their needs during in the museums.
nida26   
Apr 4, 2016
Writing Feedback / The cycle's life of salmon which is species of large fish [NEW]

The diagrams below show the life cycle of a species of large fish called the salmon.

The diagrams illustrate the cycle's life of salmon which is one of species of large fish. Overall, there are three phases of the life cycle of salmon from eggs becoming adult salmon, and salmon needs a certain time to cycle its life.

To begin, adult salmon place its eggs in upper river with slow moving water and among small stones. They need approximately 5-6 months to become fry fish which has length around 3-8 cm. It is different with salmon eggs, the fry fish live in lower river with fast flowing water, and they will pass smolt phase after 4 years later with a length 12-15 cm.

Following around 5 years, the smolt will grow to be adult salmon with maximum size about 70-76 cm. This adult salmon is the last cycle's life of salmon, and they are able to live in open sea to survive its life. They will spawn again and these cycles will be passed again.




nida26   
Aug 18, 2016
Writing Feedback / Most argue that the advance of electronic communication is harmful towards human interpersonal skill [3]

Halo, Miss Ilmi

Your Introduction:
The way how people interact each other ...

Basically, I have another opinion for constructing the introduction. I want to rewrite your introduction. Here is mine :

The advancement of sophisticated computerized media plays a critical role in the maintenance of people's relationship since it influences the way societies communicate each other. While, it is common belief that the electronic communication renders a negative effect towards inhabitants' life, I personally agree that citizens obtain numerous positive outcomes owing to these modern devices.

Thank you

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