thien le
Aug 25, 2021
Writing Feedback / [ Writing task 1 ] The number of cell phone subscribers in a particular city by gender [4]
first, I think you could give several comparative structures, which helps you more score for GRAMMATICAL RANGE for example, women have almost as many cell phones joiners as males, with 2500 members in 2005.
the second, you forgot a information that male subscribes stay the same value before increasing from 2005 to 2010.
the third, "the numbers of subscribers for both genders" ,although you talk about 2 genders, it's general figure so that you just write " number"
first, I think you could give several comparative structures, which helps you more score for GRAMMATICAL RANGE for example, women have almost as many cell phones joiners as males, with 2500 members in 2005.
the second, you forgot a information that male subscribes stay the same value before increasing from 2005 to 2010.
the third, "the numbers of subscribers for both genders" ,although you talk about 2 genders, it's general figure so that you just write " number"