Writing Feedback / [IELTS Writing part 2] Playing computer games is harmful. Do you agree with it? [3]

the influence of computer games on players

In recent decades, playing computer games has become a popular activity for children of all ages. Many people claim that this hobby offers few benefits beyond entertainment or relaxation and may, in fact, be harmful to a child's development. Do you agree with this statement?

Recently, computer games have become greatly popular all over the world, especially to the young people. While many people don't think this sort of entertainment can bring any good impacts to children, I personally support it as long as the children use it under parental guidance.

Children should be playing computer games after schools or classes because it is very useful and relaxing. They can learn plenty skills from the games such as problem solving, teamwork and strategic skills. For example, Play Stations, a popular football game is designed carefully and visually which encourages kids' develop their creativity and strategies. They learn and practice how to control the ball, pass them to teammates and goal skillfully. It is believed that under parents' observation, the kids also practice their discipline and time management when dads and moms set times to do their homework or assignments. The kids are rewarded to play games if they meet the deadlines.

Playing games is also an economical form of entertainment.Spending time at bars, clubs or live-shows can cost the youth millions Vietnam dongs whereas they can merely stay home and enjoy video games with their family and friends with a small amount of money or even none. Joining outdoor activities require equipment, vehicles or expensive outfits. In contrast, children can access online games by laptops or cellphones without buying any other extra appliances. A game, for example, averagely charges under 30,000 dongs for annual use which is very budget saving.

It is said that computer games can addict the young people at all ages from which they get distracted and ignore important things in their life. However, I believe the benefits online games bring to us outweigh the drawbacks. Online games themselves are not harmful, thus how they are used within control to make the best use is the most important.

Writing Feedback / [IELTS Writing part 2] Money should be spent on health education instead of medical technology [5]

Topic: Most developed countries spend a large proportion of their health budget on expensive medical technology and procedures. This money should, instead, be spent on health education to keep people well. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

health investments

Health care are well considered in the modern society. Most people think a huge amount of money should be invested in high cost medical equipment as well as its processes, especially in developed countries whereas other people agree spending budgets on health education is enough to get people healthy.

Many people support the fact the governments put money in equipping plenty of medical gadgets and procedure because it provides accurate diagnoses and treatment. With precise and thorough analysis, it helps reduce heavy duty jobs such as evaluating samples of blood. Additionally, they likely avoid trial-and-errors which could cause serious harm and time and money consuming issues. Besides, advanced technology and procedures bring efficient support in emergency cases. For instance, a person who accidentally gets hit on the street or has a heart attack can be physically and mentally in danger without appropriate assistance from those machines. However, receiving treatment from those massively expensive medical tools means people must afford over thousands or even millions dollars. Even if people are capable of paying, it doesn't encourage healthy lifestyles as patients tend to rely too much on the high tech medical processes.

A large number of people believe health education offers basic common preventative measures such as guidance on healthy lifestyles and first aids. Specifically, equipped essential knowledge about sleeping, eating and exercising habits, not only people can keep their bodies in shape, they are also able to protect themselves from many diseases. More importantly, health education is accessible to an enormous number of countries all over the world economically which means everyone can benefit from it online and offline without paying a massive amount of money. On the other hand, health care knowledge is so easy to get from forums, websites and tabloids that people tend to handle their health issues by themselves and refuse to ask for professional advice. Buying medicines without doctors' prescriptions or overusing aspirins and vitamins cause serious health problems.

In a nutshell, it is believed that developed countries should spend more money on advanced medical technology and processes meanwhile others are in favor of taking care of their health through many educational channels. In my opinion, those two forms of health care are equally important; therefore, both of them should be invested properly.

Writing Feedback / The transformation that happened on Taft University's campus from 1980 to 2005 is depicted on maps [3]

[IELTS] Summarize the info by reporting the main features about changes of Taft University

university development and change

The transformation that happened on Taft University's campus from 1980 to 2005 is depicted in the maps. Overall, the campus changed from very basic administrative buildings with vast open lands to more academic areas with fewer trees and more open spaces.

To the North of the Main Library and the College of Science, an open space was converted into some blocks of dormitories. Across from this area, in the Northeast, many houses were cleared and replaced with apartments. Moreover, some trees surroundings the Student Union were cut down to make way for an Arts Center and Laboratories in 1984. Seven years later, a bookstore was put in between the Arts Center and the complexes. Furthermore, a hospital was built opposite the Administration meanwhile to the far-east of the hospital, a church was installed on the corner of Fifth Avenue and Palmer Street.

To the West of the supermarket, in the South, a huge open space was transformed into a Sports and Wellness Facility in 2003. To the Southwest of this area, apart from the two new parking lots, an Event Office was established in the same year. Looking at the maps, an airport was installed after demolishing an industrial area in the Southeast corner

Writing Feedback / [IELTS] Summarise the information by reporting the main features of cement and concrete production [6]

making cement for concrete as constructional materials

The charts depict the numbers of steps and tools included in the process of making cement from which produces concrete as constructional materials. Overall, the cement making process involves four equipment with fewer input materials while the concrete production process requires only one tool with more raw materials.

In the cement making production, limestone and clay are first poured in a crusher to make a combination. This mixture is then blended in a mixer to be thoroughly combined. Next, the blended powder goes through a rotating heater where they are heated to remove moisture. Finally, the powder is conveyed in a grinder to make the fine powder prior to being packed.

On the other hand, in the process of producing concrete from cement, as the one and only step, cement, water and gravel which is small stones in the set ratios of 15%, 10%. 25% and 50%, respectively are mixed in a concrete mixer to be completely blended which outputs the concrete product.