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Posts by natashaebab
Name: Ebab
Joined: Dec 21, 2017
Last Post: Jun 28, 2018
Threads: 3
Posts: 9  
Likes: 1
From: Philippines
School: NA

Displayed posts: 12
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natashaebab   
Jun 28, 2018
Writing Feedback / IELTS- THE VARIETY OF MUSIC IN THE WORLD TODAY [4]

@hyperephania This is very helpful for me to improve my writing. Thank you!

@holt I will make sure to use this instruction. Thank you for your assessments.
natashaebab   
Jun 27, 2018
Writing Feedback / IELTS - Equal numbers of boys and girls in every course of an university? [6]

Hello! If you are totally disagree with your statement. You should include reasons why you disagree in your introduction ,at least 2 reasons. This will give the examiner an idea about your essay. Then,discuss your first reason in 1st body paragrah and second reason in your 2nd body paragraph. Make sure to explain each reason and give examples. You already have good grammar and vocabulary. I hope this would help you.
natashaebab   
Jun 27, 2018
Writing Feedback / IELTS- THE VARIETY OF MUSIC IN THE WORLD TODAY [4]

Question: There are many different types of music in the world today. Why do we need music? Is the traditional music of a country more important than the international music that is heard everywhere nowadays?

My answer:

Why do we need music, especially the classical one?



Music has a lot of genre such as country, pop, jazz, classic, etc. It is all about the matter of preference what to listen. We can choose whatever knd of music we want to hear everyday. People listen to music because it is one way to get away from stress and it can boost the mood of most us. Although we listen to many types of music everyday, traditional music is way more important than international music because it can be the identity of one country and this kind of music genre are mostly unforgettable.

Introducing music in our daily activities is like a stree therapy and a mood booster. Some people listen to their favorite music to get away from all the tension they experienced everyday. For instance, a person who went home from work usually listen to the meditation sounds and calming nature playlist for them to feel relax. In addition, music boost the mood in some person through enhancing their productivity when they do exercise and some student used music to increase their alertness and focus when they study with their subjects while others chose to listen happy songs when they are depressed.

Most people heard different types of music everyday such pop, coutnry, rock and ballad and many more. Traditional music, which another music genre most of us heard, is more important than the present music nowadays because this kind of music serves as the identity of one country. We can hear a story from its lyric and what type of tempo was used to create this music. For example, latin music has distinct rhythm and uses their language in making songs. Similarly, lyric of traditional music is more meaningful than today's music and it is treasured as part of the culture such as folk songs and country music that was produced and composed by famous song writer of the particular country.

In conclusion, music is vital in our life not only it adds color but also it can be a stress reliever and mood booster. Traditional music is way more important up to these days because it is part of one counrty's culture and a kind of music that is unforgettable which anybody can still listen today.
natashaebab   
Jun 26, 2018
Writing Feedback / Studying alone is the best way. Agree or disagree? [5]

You have good vocabulary and collocation but you should know how to use them.

You can generate atleast 2 reason if you agree or disagree

Intro: Paraphrase the question, your stand (agree or Disagree), then your reason

Paragraph 1 (1st reason) topic sentence, explanation & Example

Paragraph 2 (2st reason) topic sentence, explanation & Example

Conclusion: State you opinion( agree or disagree) and Summarise your 2 reasons

hope these would help you
natashaebab   
Jun 26, 2018
Writing Feedback / Spending large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities [5]

The idea of your essay is okay. Task achievement criteria (checked).

I think you should work on using complex sentences. You can cut long sentences for the reader to better understand your paragraph.

... in a positive way, where as trains can ... in one go. By that, there will be fewer cars ... (or you can choose better conjunction and connectors)

You can also add explanation sentence after your topic sentence and before giving example.

Hope these would help you.
natashaebab   
Jun 26, 2018
Writing Feedback / WEALTHY NATIONS SHOULD SHARE WITH THIRD WORLD COUNTRIES [4]

@Kino18

Thanks you so much. I will work on that. Honestly, I am not sure what type of questions is this. I thought it was open ended? Btw, this question is taken exactly from Cambridge Practice Test.
natashaebab   
Jun 26, 2018
Writing Feedback / WEALTHY NATIONS SHOULD SHARE WITH THIRD WORLD COUNTRIES [4]

Question: Should wealthy nations be required to share their wealth among poorer nations such thing as foods and education? Or is it the responsibility of the government of poorer nations to look after their citizens themselves?

Help if possible and don't forget about own citizens



My Answer:

Many nations are considered to be in the third world country. These countries have the capabilities to share what they have to other poorer nations like giving basic needs and proper education. This act is a form of international camaraderie within the nations. However, a government is responsible to improve its citizens to have a livelihood to acquire basic needs especially in poorer country.

We have known a lot of country that can stand alone without the help of other. Those which have a progressive economy and rich with resources. They have the capabilities to extend a help to other unfortunate country to at least attain food as their basic needs and formal education to the children. For instance, United States of America have contributed water and food in the remote area in South Africa where in some part suffers famine. Russia offered educational funds to put schools a secluded town of Haiti so that children do not need to travel long distances to attend classes.

In contrast to that, government of poorer country also have the responsibility to lift up their citizens. The government should know how to improve the livelihood of people within their area. They should be encouraged to use up their resources for them to survive in daily lives. In addition, not the only government to blame why the country became poor but also on the citizen. If people are wise enough to create a source of income such as in agriculture and crops, they will surely survived. The government has all the tools and resources to contribute to its citizens.

Taking all into considerations, wealthy nations should help other poorer country because they have all the capabilities to do so and sharing improve the relationship internationally. But then again, it is the responsibility of the government to improve its people and of course, with the active participation of its citizens.

Disclaimer: The example I used is not factual.
natashaebab   
Jun 26, 2018
Writing Feedback / IELTS - large number of children play computer games - how it may affect them? [6]

she would likely to learn any major(what?) faster rather than those who do not.

the extremely exposition and vulnerability (in what?)

... probably the most commonly common solution in our society such as broaden the information about the length (of what?) on computer that have already been discusses discussed. How long should be allowed children playing games daily? children be allowed to play computer games? Since, the kid ... have friends with any lack of essential needs, parents should allow limit them to play their favorite games atleast one hour a day. Moreover, the most crucial main point should be the balance their of having the entertainment and daily basis activities.

However, a limited limiting the time in front of the computers can diminish those the problem.

Hello! You have a good argument. You have good body paragraph construction. I was confused in the 3rd paragraph. i think you should focus on suggestions to minimize the bad effects and don't leave the reader fill in the blank in some of the sentences. Just a friendly advice
natashaebab   
Jun 26, 2018
Writing Feedback / IELTS - Why do people learn a foreign language? Show the reasons. [7]

when they happen happened to visit a country or start to work there in a country

On the one hand,.. foreign languages are is job opportunities

... the advantages in applying

It is a common knowledge

My friendly assessment is your minor error in the usage of articles in your essay.
natashaebab   
Dec 25, 2017
Writing Feedback / IELTS 2- Some people think that Twitter, Facebook and similar sites have a big negative impact [4]

IELTS WRITING TASK 2

Some people think that social networking sites have a huge negative impact on both individuals and society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

social media influence on people



In this generation using social networking sites have been part of our daily lives. It has positive and negative effects at the same time. Still it depends on how they are being used for us that what kind of effects we should get from this existing forms of media. In my humble opinion, I disagree that it has huge negative impact on both individuals and society.

I am not into an idea that social media have a huge negative effect to us. Actually, these have been very useful since they exist. We could use an application as a term of communication if we want to talk to our relatives anytime and anywhere. In addition, social media such as Facebook, Intagram and Twitter, have been very effective in spreading news updates and interesting articles. Also, I noticed some of us make used social media to grow businesses like online selling and purchasing. Personally, I find it more advantageous in my daily life. As well as, society could benefit from it depending on how it is being utilized.

Sometimes social media are abused by some us. Cyberbullying through internet is one of the examples. We cannot deny that some of us have experienced it. Moreover, spreading fake news could directly affect the society if the netizens keep on believing and sharing all of these. Another concern was, many of us considered scrolling social media as part of their normal life to the point that it takes much of their time of the day.

Taking all into considerations, I disagree with the fact that social networking sites have a huge negative impact. It is a matter of using them in the right way so us to have a positive effect on us and in our society

Thank you guys for your assessments: ).
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