Undergraduate /
"Can Tab Drive" Common app essay [9]
This is the essay I am most worried about, so if you could please give me any advice on how to improve it, I would appreciate it very much. Also, I will do my absolute best to make any improvements to your essays if they are due soon also. Thanks a ton!
Evaluate a significant experience, achievement, risk you have taken, or ethical dilemma you have faced and its impact on you.Can you imagine being a poor, young child in desperate need of regular kidney dialysis that your family simply cannot afford? Yeah, me neither. That is why I felt so touched when my dad told me about a girl, around my age, suffering from this exact situation. I was in fifth grade living in Maryland at the time, and my dad's squadron decided to begin a fund-raiser to help the sick girl. The chiefs collected the aluminum openers on the tops of soda cans, so they could recycle the aluminum and use the profit to buy the girl her dialysis. I was inspired by the squadron's plan, and concocted a similar one of my own. If the chiefs at my dad's squadron could make a difference with these can tabs, then how much money could I raise if I asked my entire school to contribute?
That day, I wrote a letter to my principal. I explained to her what my idea was and asked her if we should try and do a similar fund-raiser. I was called out of class into a meeting with her the next day. She had read my letter and agreed that the school would be an excellent place to have a can tab drive. We set a goal of 2,000 can tabs and started collecting right away. I appeared on my school's televised announcements once a week to push people to drink soda and save the tabs. I was amazed with the wonderful generosity my school showed. We passed up the 2,000 benchmark by quite a bit. The final count was over 30,000 can tabs, which filled up two entire trash bags. The drive was so successful, that the school continues it even today, seven years later. Not only is it still held every year, but it continues to raise more money each and every year.
This experience has taught me much about both myself and others, but three things stand out most. I learned how to grab people's attention. For example, I was chosen this year to compete in an oratorical contest for the American Legion Scholarship. Only three students were elected to compete, and thanks in part to my ability to grab people's attention, and speak publicly in front of them, my teachers recommended me to represent our school. I also learned leadership and organizational skills that I have put to great use in serving the marching band as an officer this year. I played a role in helping the band, which hasn't competed in any marching competitions since Hurricane Katrina, attend our District LMEA's and score an "excellent" rating in every category. The final lesson I learned from my can tab drive was that any good idea not put into action is completely wasted. Since I wrote the letter to my principal and saw what a difference I could make, I have never let a good idea go to waste. When our beta club was searching for a theme to use in our skit for Convention, I came up with the idea to perform a musical played on items like trashcans, brooms and even toilet plungers. I was appointed the coordinator for the skit and it has already placed first at our district convention, and will compete at state in January.
I value much from the can tab drive, but I will never forget how willing everyone was to do some good for those less fortunate. I have come to believe that deep down, all people have a desire to help their fellow man. That desire still burns strong for me today, and I don't think it will ever extinguish.
