Undergraduate / USC-The experience of finding optimism and its purpose [2]

USC's speaker series What Matters to Me and Why asks faculty and staff to reflect on their values, beliefs, and motivations. Presenters talk about choices they have made, difficulties encountered and commitments solidified. Write an essay about an event or experience that helped you learn what is important to you and why it is important.

"Somewhere over the rainbow, way up high..." I awoke to the soothing lyrics of the old classic song lilting from my alarm clock. It was 7 a.m. (a bit redundant) in the morning and my first day as a volunteer surveyor at the V.A #800080(Explain the acronym) hospital. I began my volunteering experience with a serious face, unsure of what to expect but prepared to make the best of whatever came my way. After listening intently to my supervisor explain the job to me, I gathered ten clipboards and a stack of surveys and made my way towards a tiny table in a corner of the medical practice waiting room.

My job was to survey the waiting veterans about the effects of the economic recession on their current living situation. It was my first time surveying and speaking to the veterans; I had no idea what kind of responses to expect from them. I tentatively approached the nearest veteran and began an introduction I had played over in my mind for preparation. Much to my surprise, the old, tired-looking man smiled warmly at me and listened patiently to my inquiries for a survey . He told me he had bad eyesight, so I sat down and slowly read through the survey questions for him. As I interviewed him, I learned that he had no family in America and lived in solitude. It was not his choice to live in such solitude when his family dispersed. He had become so accustomed to living alone when no one visited (sounds kinda confusing)that he no longer attempted to form new relationships. Hearing about his loneliness saddened me, but at the end of our conversation, he told me how it had made his day to speak leisurely with someone. I suddenly felt good that I was able to coax a smile from this man by merely asking questions and listening to his responses. I blurted out that his comment also made my day. He grinned at this and asked if I knew what was the only contagion welcomed at a hospital. When I said I did not know, he told me that it was happiness.

Even though I have heard the phrase "happiness is infectious" countless times, it sounded and felt different ly coming from this veteran. He gave me a larger purpose to volunteer other than to help. I had not known how much optimism a simple conversation could evoke prior to this experience. I realized that this happiness I felt could make a big difference in someone's life. I could brighten their day by conversing and showing a bright smile, yet at the same time, I knew a happy attitude could inspire others. I took my time carefully conversing with many veterans and found that they had similar situations of feeling alone and living without much family support. With this mindset, I looked forward to surveying more veterans in hopes of spreading this optimism. I saw how hospitals are more than just a place to give medicines and to(parallel structure) cure illnesses; it is a place for making bonds, spreading cheer, and having an emotional, positive impact on patients and visitors alike. This experience taught me that being optimistic is different from hiding behind a merely cheerful exterior, it involves focusing on the present and finding ways to improve. My talking to veterans represented that happiness takes personal actions that can bring about a better future. (kinda fix it up a bit, it sounds like you tried to make 'talking' a adjective to describe a conversation.) It can inspire without preaching to others. I was glad that I had volunteered there and realized that the veterans had helped me more than I had helped them. I realized the importance of having and maintaining a positive attitude in the face of adversity. "Somewhere over the rainbow, skies are blue..."; I awake each day and reach for each new experience with a smiling face.

Undergraduate / "Research life + diabetic father" - Carnegie Mellon Supplement [3]

Okay, here's the first draft of my Carnegie Mellon supplement >< I know it's so last minute...so any help is appreciated!!!!! Things to look for: did i answer the prompt completely? should i add more stuff about carnegie mellon? grammar?

Prompt: explain why you have chosen Carnegie Mellon and your particular major(s), department(s) or program(s). This essay should include the reasons why you've chosen the major(s), any goals or relevant work plans and any other information you would like us to know. If you are applying to more than one college or program, please mention each college or program you are applying to

A drop of blood lands on a dot marking the target on a fat, gray, plastic strip. "Daddy, why do you have to do that?" I asked, as a puzzled and concerned child. My father is diabetic, yet at the time, all I knew about diabetes was my father's frequent mood swings, the frustration of piercing his fingers, and the incessant clacking of pills. When my dad fell unconscious in a diabetic coma on a Christmas Eve, I flew to him in a shock. I scrambled to dial 9-1-1 and before I knew it, sirens blared outside the building. One officer asked me to list the medications my father took and I was gravely proud to know everything they needed, down to the medication and his schedule for taking them. After much hoisting, my dad left to the ambulance on a gurney as a hurricane of anxiety and rage for his well-being set in my heart. When he finally returned fully recovered, I realized how close I had come to losing my father. I had watched my father suffer diabetes all my life and experienced his fits of frustration, yet I only felt angry at my situation. Not until this jolt to reality did I realize that it is not about how much I or someone else suffers; it is about what those who can do something are doing about it. With this mindset, I researched on diabetes extensively by reading and became introduced to the world of diseases.

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Undergraduate / "to pay respects to my ancestors" Personal Statement (Topic of Choice) [4]

Please leave any feedback for this essay. I'm still not quite sure if it's better to show or tell...

Every spring my parents and I travel to a quiet temple in Fremont, California to pay respects to my ancestors. As I place an offering of bright wildflowers on the altar, I clasp my hands for a blessing prayer. Yet, instead of wishing for a blissful year, I contemplate on how my parents' stories have always given me lasting motivation and essentially, a path around life's obstacles and to the passions I live for today.

"All I want is for you to be able to stand on your two feet," said my father. He was telling a story about the hardships of growing up in Nepal. His empowering determination as he spoke about escaping army enlistment and poverty to traverse to America resonated in my mind. I thought about how he started humbly with nothing but still had high expectations and struggled for a home in America. I realized that I have always been fortunate and should cherish my good life, but more importantly, his determination showed me that every life brims with possibility. By seizing the opportunities that come my way, I would find myself always moving forward. With this thought, I decided to take advantage of the informational section on diseases in the library. My father fell victim to debilitating diabetes before I was born and I always felt clueless about his condition until I leafed through the many medical books in the public library. As I discovered the afflictions of diabetes and how heart disorders and neuropathy can easily follow, I came to understand my father more and recognized my passion to become a doctor. I realized this is my path towards helping, giving care and making a difference in someone's life.

My mother always told me, "As long as you have the will to pursue your dream, you will go anywhere. " She had escaped from the Vietnam War to America as a monk. I stared in awe at my bald mother in old snapshots and wondered what kind of perseverance it took to survive such a tumultuous age. I did not understand before, but the more aware I became of her struggle to single-handedly support our family with her two jobs, the more I realized that all it took was a purpose and a will to succeed, like she had told me. My mother knew exactly what she was working for when she escaped the war. Each day she spends handling two jobs is to keep the life in America she has built. Her struggles inspired me to never see quitting as an option and to always focus on my dreams and goals. I especially recalled this inspiration and her advice when I failed to enter science honors. I felt like I had failed academically but I did not let the setback faze me from pursuing more knowledge in science. I signed up for an advanced placement science course outside of school and despite the difficult material, I persevered with the desire to learn more. By immersing myself with numerous science handbooks and going through problems and labs carefully, I discovered how exciting solving science could be. I found the means to better study habits and confidence in performing and comprehending lab work. Like my mother, my goal of understanding science brought me to develop perseverance and a love of science.

Returning to my prayer, I have to take a stand like my father did and find my own paths to solve my problems and reach for my dreams. My parents' triumphs had planted the roots of my aspirations and their stories reminded me that people everywhere suffer worse hardships than I have. If I simply gave up, how would I ever spread care in my community as a doctor and become an inspiration, like my parents, to others? With my

parents as my motivation, I look at situations in a new light and realize how improving takes action. I have to use my own hands to do whatever it takes to move forward. I find myself striving for ways to improve and to test my limits despite the odds. As the prayer finally ends, I feel a surge of self-confidence. I quietly thank my ancestors and my parents for all their support. To this day, I always stand on my own two feet and hold onto my dreams to be a doctor and an inspiration.