Unanswered [8] | Urgent [0]
  

Posts by hanachi
Name: sanhanachi
Joined: Sep 21, 2016
Last Post: Sep 22, 2016
Threads: 3
Posts: 9  
Likes: 2
From: Indonesia
School: english studio

Displayed posts: 12
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hanachi   
Sep 22, 2016
Writing Feedback / TED_Video: How to Be a Good Mentor [4]

TED_Video: How to Be a Good Mentor

A good mentor created many great students. Be a good mentor likened as a leader in the team. Which a good team or needs a good mentor to guide them. Like Mrs. Margaret Heffernan ever said that: "a good team, they had three characteristics, the really successful teams, First, they showed high degrees of social sensitivity to each other. Secondly, the successful teams gave roughly equal time to each other. Thirdly, had women in them. But, the keys, their social connectedness to each other."

It related to the ways to be a good mentor. There are some steps, as, approach each mentorship differently, set expectations together in the very beginning, take a genuine interest in your mentee as a person, know when to wait before giving advice, improve your emotional intelligence, do not assume anything about your mentee, be really forthcoming about mistakes you have made, celebrate students achievements, give more than you ask for, seek out classes or project related to skills your mentee wants to develop, solve for the long-term, lead by sample.

But, being a good mentor takes practice and patience. Understand how to communicate with the students, and you will learn a lot about yourself, whether you are able to provide a vision that motivates and help others, and so on. Like Mrs. Margaret ever said that "Arup believes that the culture of helpfulness is central to their success".

Important - you must give more useful comments to avoid account suspension.
hanachi   
Sep 22, 2016
Writing Feedback / (TED) What Islam Really Says About Women: Alaa Murabit [4]

hallo elasyari93 ,
your writing so interesting, i have corected, and i have suggestion

1. at this sentence: "As a young Libyan Muslim woman, she is really proud of her faith"

wish it useful, keep writing ^^
hanachi   
Sep 22, 2016
Writing Feedback / Summary: Chinese Anti-Corruption Activists on Trial for "Disturbing Public Order" [3]

hallo Firman,
i have corrected your writing, and i have suggestions

1. at this sentence: "This incident occured about two years ago" should be "The incidents, was occured for two years ".

2. at this sentence: "t he government was perseptedpresented nothing to do their primary ..."

3. at this sentence: "The corruption problems were being becomes extra ordinary crime...

thank you, wish it useful. keep writing ^^
hanachi   
Sep 22, 2016
Writing Feedback / GRE argument writing issue - censoring internet at workplace [4]

hallo, JayR
i have corrected your writing, and i have suggestions

1. at this sentence: "But there is many people know about the research results that showed the productivity"

2. at this sentence: "is the main reason for dec rease of productivity"

3. at this sentence: "will bring the profit as suggested. To monitor the internet use, Cla mps Industries needs to buy the tool and hi gher"

please check your writing before you posting it, due to the fact that it can be fateful, cause resulted different meaning.

thank you, wish it useful. keep writing ^^
hanachi   
Sep 22, 2016
Scholarship / 'to learn more about microalgae'; Help me to improve my study plan (MEXT Scholarship) [2]

halo riko99,
I have corrected your writing, and I have some correction.

1. at this sentence: "specifically biodiversity, taxonomy, ltrastructure , and phylogeny of microalgae", what did you mean about that term? please check it before you post your writing

2. at this sentence: "Furthermore, It is important and will" shoul be using 'un capital alphabet', like this "Furthermore, it is important and will"

3. at this sentence: "I will take more course in chemistry" should be " I will take more courses in chemistry".
because 'chemistry' is uncountable, so 'course' should be 'courses'

thank you, wish it useful, and keep writing ^^
hanachi   
Sep 22, 2016
Writing Feedback / Summary: Sees the Progress of Tuberculosis Treatments [4]

Summary: Sees the Progress of Tuberculosis Treatments

Tuberculosis (TB) is an infectious disease caused by the bacterium Mycobacterium Tuberculosis. It affects the lungs, but can also affect other parts of the body, like bones, brain, liver, kidneys, and hearts. Most infections do not have symptoms, there is 10% chance of latent TB becoming active TB, this risk is much higher in people who have compromised immune systems, i.e. people living with HIV or malnutrition, or people who smoke. The disease affects young adults, mostly.

In 2012, 80% of reported TB cases occurred in just 22 countries. The World Health Organization says 8.6 million people became ill with available statistics. The diseases spread through the air when a person with TB (whose lungs are affected) coughs, sneezes, or talks. It is contagious, but it is not easy to catch. Most of people infected with TB live in developing countries.

The treatments for Tuberculosis can be cured when the right medication is available and administered correctly. The right type and length of antibiotic treatment depends on a person's age, overall health, system of immune, potential resistance to drugs, whether it active or latent, and the location of infection (as the lungs, bones, brain, kidneys). The treatments must be completed fully, moreover, if the TB symptoms have gone away. The bacteria that have survived the treatment could become resistant to the medication that has been prescribed.

The preventions of Tuberculosis, can be avoiding other people by not going to school or work, sleeping by yourself, and masks the mouth, will help to minimize the risk or germs from reaching anyone else.

In conclusion, must be keep the immune of body, the dietary habit, maintaining cleanliness of the body and environment, if already infected must be right treatments with completed fully, and trying to get some prevention. That is due to the fact that if TB is not controlled early, and drug resistant it caused the strains spread, and the world will face a far more deadly threat.
hanachi   
Sep 22, 2016
Writing Feedback / Some editors have a great deal of consideration before broadcasting news on television or newspaper [5]

hallo aris05,
i have corrected your writing, but i have some corrections

1. at this sentence: "... to ensure that the news is an interesting"

2. at this sentence: "It would be better if good news areis broadcasted"

3. at this sentence: "I believe that the good news areis supposed to have a big proportion" it is a past tense, so should be 'supposed'

thank you, wish useful. keep writing ^^
hanachi   
Sep 22, 2016
Scholarship / Big contrast between my passion and the place where I grew up. KGSP scholarship Personal Statement [3]

Hallo philo,
i have corrected your writing, i have some corrections

1. at this sentence: "Electricity is seldom available, people dieingdying in hospitals because of ...

2. at this sentence: "... I spend my holidays with my Father in his Solar C ompany"
for the places, it should using a capital at the first alphabet.

3. "I have enroll ed myself into a Trade course"
there are some typo over there, please correct before you post your writing.

thank you, wish it useful. keep writing ^^
hanachi   
Sep 21, 2016
Writing Feedback / A Great Elephant Was Defeated By an Ingenious Ant Once upon a time, in the jungle forest, lived ass [2]

A Great Elephant Was Defeated By an Ingenious Ant

Once upon a time, in the jungle forest, lived assortment of animals, from the smallest as ants and the biggest animals like Elephant. The elephant was so arrogant, he felt the most powerful, due to the fact that he had ever defeated a tiger with his long trunk, the tiger lifted to the high and slammed on the ground. Wherefore the tiger has been defeated, so an elephant claimed to be sovereign in the jungle. Nowadays, afterwards, king of the jungle's role has been replaced by an arrogant elephant.

The elephant more and more felt very great and cocky, underestimated others, belonging the ant. As far as the ant defying him, and he takes the challenges. They immediately enter the battle areas, Ant trampled by elephant, nevertheless, the ant is dodgy and courageous, he found an elephant's weaknesses in his big and wide ears. The ant was get into the ears hole, slowly. The ant began to ate the contents of elephant ears, the elephant began to feel pain, his huge body roll around on the ground for resisting the pain. The elephant had tried to remove the ant out of his ears. Nonetheless, his efforts nothing.

'Mercy.... Ants! I plead guilty.' The elephant is Scream out. The elephant began to gave up.
Heard elephant's cries, the ant felt pity, and the ant out of the ears canal.
'Therefore, you should not be arrogant. You are the biggest, but there is more than you. Now, you are strong. But, there is stronger than you. The labor force is not always able to help you. However, intelligence is always on top of everything', he said.

The elephant only silences, he felt very embarrassed. Other animals only witness the defeated of elephant and cheering up. One of the animals who watched the fight, comments:

'Therefore, you should not underestimate other animals, even Ants very small. However, Ants is a hero could defeat the arrogance and pride.'

The moral of the Beast Fairy Tale: As great as us, there is always other people who have higher skills than us. The advantages, we have do not make us arrogant and forget yourself. Precisely, must be humble and grateful.
hanachi   
Sep 21, 2016
Writing Feedback / TED Summary: The Taboo Secret To Better Health by Molly Winter [5]

hallo Iedha01,
i have corrected your writing, i want to give some suggests

1. at this sentence: "have you ever thinkwhere are those things go?" should be "have you ever think where is those things go?

2. at this sentence: "She mention one taboo issue" should added '-s', cause before mention there is 'she as a subject', so should be "She mentions one taboo issue"

thank you, wish it useful. keep writing ^^
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