Undergraduate / Playing sports, watching scientific documentaries: something you do for the pleasure [3]

Prompt:
We know you lead a busy life, full of activities, many of which are required of you. Tell us about something you do for the pleasure of it. (*)(100 words or fewer)

My passage:
Being a well-balanced person seems to be impossible in this bustling world, but to me, it is not.
I manage to keep in contact with my friends. Usually, we go out to play ball games such as football, tennis and badminton. Although it makes me feel exhausted, when I think about its benefit to health and the rewarding moment when we have cold drinks and chat, I will be relaxed.

Also I love to watch my favorite scientific documentaries. I spend my time on Megastructure, Planet Earth, etc. I find lots of invaluable knowledge as well as fun in them.

- I want to ask whether it is good enough for a university essay.

- Also should I focus on one activity only?

- I appreciate your help if you can proofread the eassy for me. :D

This passgae is written by Tony Choy from Hong Kong. Copyrights reserved.

Undergraduate / Strong sense of obstinacy best describes me. MIT [9]

Prompt:
What attribute of your personality are you most proud of, and how has it impacted your life so far? This could be your creativity, effective leadership, sense of humor, integrity, or anything else you'd like to tell us about.(*) (200-250 words)

My response:

A strong sense of curiosity is a basic element which makes me up.

When I was young, my mind was full of curiosity. I read an article introducing television one day. Why the black box produces moving images? I made a guess; it might be a miniature opera house with mini actors. The supernatural creatures played all sorts of show. I was eager to know the answer, to everyone surprise, I dissembled a TV at home. I felt depressed when I realized there were wired magnets and mega funnel only. The actors were gone.

When I grow up, curiosity turns to be obstinacy. From ultimate machine to mini gadget, from daily accessories to professional equipment, nothing I do not find interest in. One time, I picked up a lens from a camera. Why the object under it diminishes? I thought it was a magic. To prove it, I searched every corner in the World Wide Web and visited library again and again. Each time, it came up with the same conclusion, my thesis was wrong. But, I felt more delighted than upset as I filled myself with curiosity.

When curiosity goes to extreme, it becomes motivation. I am amazed by Diffraction Grating. It can form many fascinating rainbows. I am eager to know what would happen with varying specifications. I build my own set of apparatus, using a torch as light source, and successfully rebuild the experiment.

Curiosity develops my obstinacy and motivation. It makes my life full of fun.

Undergraduate / being a successful leader- the most significant challenge you've faced [2]

prompt:
Tell us about the most significant challenge you've faced or something important that didn't go according to plan. How did you manage the situation?(*) (200-250 words)

my response:
Being a successful leader is much harder than I think. I remember that after I had been promoted to team leader in Civil Aid Service Cadet, I needed to lead a team go camping.

Before the journey, I was quite confident to lead my team well because I had done a good planning and studied hard about how to make a tent and how to play orienteering.

Soon after we arrived at the camp site, we were ordered to build a tent where we slept. I told my teammates to follow my instruction. However one of them suggested adding more nails to support a slant column. I denied his request as I initially thought the tent could sustain a night. Unexpectedly, due to condensed water, our "rigid" tent collapsed at the weak point. Luckily, I have brought a torch and we rebuilt it successfully based on the suggestion.

Next day, we played orienteering. We had to find out checkpoints in forest using map and compass. Bas things came twice. I couldn't imagine how it was when I discovered my compass, the only piece in my team, was broken. At first, I felt confused and had my brain stuck. A moment later, I started to recall my memory and used the watch-method to determine directions so we finished our task in time.

Good planning and wide range of knowledge is necessary for us to succeed. Even if it is out of plan, don't panic, listen to others may help.

How is my response?
Does it meets the entrance requirement?
Also if possible, please help me proofread it.

Undergraduate / Impoverished family but supportive parents, school - my world [2]

prompt:
Describe the world you come from; for example, your family, clubs,school,community,city, or town. How has that world shaped your dreams and aspirations?(*) (200-250 words)

my response:
Hong Kong, an affluent city in South East China, is a place where I born. However I live with family in a region which everyone called "City of Sadness". My mother, originally was a worker in the sewage department, has resigned to take care of my brother, sister and me since I was five. Now my father is the only income earner. School fee, textbooks and other expenses increase dramatically. His salary can barely make the ends meet but harder as time goes on. It makes me realize I have to work hard.

When I was young, I helped repairing broken appliances. Pipeline, electrical socket or furniture, nothing I couldn't fix. Sometimes I would consider how CD player works and how does water turns to steam when boiling. It should be the first time; I discovered my interest in Physics and Engineering. I started to dream about being a great scientist and invent ultimate machines.

When I was told I entered one of the top high schools in the territory, I was overjoyed. I not only appreciate the reputation but also the support provided. It is an English school focused on science education. There are five laboratories in total with different purposes. It provides equipment for basic needs. Also, the teachers are amiable. They encourage me to do what I want, being a physicist or an engineer.

I am eager to use physics and engineering to reciprocate my parents and my school as well as contribute to the world.

I wonder whether it is a good essay.
Also i will appreciate your help on grammatical correction.

Undergraduate / Phy & MechE-----which department or program at MIT appeals to you [3]

prompt:
Although you may not yet know what you want to major in, which department or program at MIT appeals to you and why? (*) (100 words or fewer)

my response:
I have built up my enthusiasm in both Physics and Mechanical Engineering since I was in my primary school. I like reading books about physics and re-assembling old machines. I always dream of being a scientist and making innovative aircrafts, spacecrafts. I am eager to design innovative machines as well as unmask the secrets of universe.

I am sure MIT is the right place for me. There are advanced laboratories where students can bring Physics into life and great machines which students can apply the skills in Mechanical Engineering. Also its world leading professors and its infinite researches opportunity best match my eagerness for contributing to this world.

I want to major in both Physics and Mechanical Engineering. Then should I write both of them. Or just choose one?
Also, if I write both, will it affect my chance to get in MIT?