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Posts by logo3098
Name: Shu Lin
Joined: Nov 6, 2014
Last Post: Dec 2, 2014
Threads: 5
Posts: 15  
From: Australia
School: latrobe university

Displayed posts: 20
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logo3098   
Nov 6, 2014
Writing Feedback / It is significant that zoos are used to protect rare animals - IELTS essay [6]

Q:Some people think zoos are cruel and all the zoos should be closed. However, some people think zoos are useful to protect the rare animals.Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

There are lots of zoos across the world. Some people state that zoo that limit free of wild animals should be closed; others believe that protecting rare animals is the function of the zoos. My view is that zoos protect the life of rare animals.

People who harbor the view that zoos should be closed have their own reasons. First of all, the zoos restrict the free of wild animals due to cages. Wild animals of zoos live in a cage that allow them to move around in small space, which change from wild animals to domestic animals leading to wildlife lose nature features of them.

In contrast, some people believe that zoos protect rare animals in nowadays when the fur of rare animals is very luxury. More and more hunters kill rare animals in order to their fur or tusk, for example, there are thousands of elephants killed by hunters, and then their tusks will be cut by people,but zoo reduces happened this phenomenon thus conserve the animals' life.

Personally, I agree that zoo is beneficial for rare animals due to protecting diversity of wildlife. Because habitats of wildlife are demolished and climate change, thousands of species are extincted every year. In this question, the zoo plays a key role in preserving the diversity of wildlife by artificial feeding and breeding.

To sum up, it is significant that zoos are used to protect rare animals. This means that we should improve facilities and areas of zoo, and should not close the zoo that is only home to wildlife in this day and age.
logo3098   
Nov 11, 2014
Writing Feedback / People should use phone in correct occasions and should not use it in specific public areas; IELTS [6]

Q:Some people believe that mobile phones should be banned in public, especially on public transport, in restaurants and cinemas. Others think that mobile phones should be allowed to use anywhere. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Using mobile phones is more popular than before due to an age of information and changes of people's daily life. However, some people state that should not use phone in public; other believe that people can use phone in anywhere. My view is that mobile phones should be banned in special public places.

People who believe phones can use in anyplace have their reasons. First of all, it is obvious that human have rights to do their favorable things which is not illegal. This means that using phone in anywhere is not illegal behavior that is the right of people. So, from the law angle, it is reasonable that mobile phones is allowed to used in public.

In contrast, others believe that mobile phones should be banned using in public, specifically in library, hospital, and cinemas. This is because using phone in these special public is much ruder. If people speak loudly in these public, others will be affected by people who using phone. So, from the ethical angle, people should ban using phone is public.

Personally I agree that people should not use phone in special public place, including library, restaurants and cinemas. For example, someone use phone in library and speak loudly, which will cause noise in a quite atmosphere of library leading to affect people who study in library. Although it does not break the law, it is bad manners in public.

To sum up, people should use phone in correct occasions and should not use phone in special public places. Meanwhile, in terms of aspects of ethical, using phone in public is rude behaviors.
logo3098   
Nov 17, 2014
Writing Feedback / Memory Course - write a letter to the course convenor (IELTS) [2]

I am an university student,enrolled in a graduate engineering degree, in my last year, this means that I have to pass a lot of exams, and in addition i am willing to present my final thesis project by the end of the year.

I am an university student who enroll in a graduate engineering degree in my last year, which means that I have to pass a lot of exams.In addition that,i am willing to present my final thesis project by the end of the year.
logo3098   
Nov 17, 2014
Writing Feedback / Achy Breaky Heart - Article Review [3]

not only because it is so ear-catching unlike other articles---error grammar

because not only is it...

you use inverted sentence here
logo3098   
Nov 17, 2014
Writing Feedback / We can get knowledge from news, but some people think we can't trust the journalist. IELTS essay [6]

Q:We can get knowledge from news, but some people think we can't trust the journalist. What do you think? What qualities should a journalist have? (Report type).

The media become more advanced than before, which means that news are always around us. However, some people state that we can learn knowledge from it; others believes that we can not believe it. My view is that we can get information from the most of news.

Personally I agree that we can get lots of knowledge from the majority of news in this day and age. First of all, it is obvious that news is picked out by journalist professionals. This means that reality of news has higher quality and it will not be informal published to the public. In addition this, another reasons is that news provides a lot of up-to-date information for the public. This means that government will pay more attention to news, because if news provides a wrong news for people, this news may cause scare phenomenon. For example, news publishes a wrong information that North Korean has nuclear weapon, the public will become scare. Therefor, we can believe reality of the most of new.

The accuracy and objectively of news are the most significant features in the journalist. First and foremost, the accuracy of news that means news has responsibilities to sure that provide truth of information. If new provides inaccuracy information, the communities can not keep pace with the world. Another key factor is objectively, the professional of the media must have fair attitude, especially they must use inclusive language when they publish some news that different culture group and people with disability. Thus, these two key factors should involve in the journalist.
logo3098   
Nov 18, 2014
Writing Feedback / "Which One Would You Choose, Traditional or Modern Medicine?" - Article review on medicine [2]

The article I'm about to review is entitled "Which One Would You Choose, Traditional or Modern Medicine?", the author of which is Marcel Glen Longdong.

my version: The article that talks about to review entitled "Which One Would You Choose, Traditional or Modern Medicine?", the author of which is Marcel Glen Longdong.
logo3098   
Nov 23, 2014
Writing Feedback / Who has the most enormous impact among people around the world? [4]

Q:Some people think that politicians have the greatest influence on the world. Other people,however, believe that scientists have the greatest influence. Discuss both of views and give your opinion.

Who is the most enormous impact people around the world? Some people state that politicians have the most significant role in the world; others believe that scientists play key role in the world. My view is that they are both vital in the world.

People who regard politicians as the greatest influence in the world take many factors into consideration. First of all, it is obvious that politicians develop the policy that one country do business with other country. This means that GDP of a country will improve, which leads to country depending on export and import of international trade. For example, Jinping Xi, premier China, signs trade contract with Australia in 2014. This behavior probably brings 1 billion dollar to China each year.

However, others hold different attitudes towards this issue. They believe that scientists have the greatest impact on the world. First and foremost, scientists introduce advanced technology which result in boosting people's living standards and helping people to discover more secret about this world. For instance, the robot that can explore dangerous places where people can not enter, such as firing house, black hole and deep sea and so on.

Personally, I agree that they both have a serious effect on the world. In terms of peace of world, politicians make great contributions to the world. Because they often go to other counties to sign some policies which cross countries and cultures to communicate, or become allies. From anther degree, scientists are overcoming global crisis, such as greenhouse that is made of discharging more carbon dioxide by transports. So scientists also make a great contribution to the world.

To sum up, my opinion is that we have hard time thinking which on is greater, they both have essential effects on the world. Politicians focus on peace and economy of world while scientists concentrate on up-to-date technology and climate of global crisis.
logo3098   
Dec 2, 2014
Writing Feedback / There are different learning abilities of children in the class to accept same educational ways. [2]

1.Q: Some people argue that teaching children of different abilities together benefits all of them. Others believe that intelligent children should be taught separately and given special treatment. Discuss both views and how do you think about it?

There are different learning abilities of children in the class to accept same educational ways. However, some state that studying together will be beneficial for all children; other believe that more talented children should be taught alone. My view is that we should treat every child fairly,to teach all kids in one class.

On the one hand, some argue that talented kid should be taught separately and they have some reasons. First of all, it is obvious that talented kids' speed of learning new knowledge is faster than average children. This means that if giving some specific class or train to these kids, they become an opportunity of scientists higher, compare with average children. As a result, they could make more contributions to society and world.

On the other hand, people who harbor the view that teaching all children together take many factors into consideration. First and foremost, genius is not inherent. Every genius always spends a lot of time studying and then get knowledge from process of learning. Therefore, giving same ways of education is a reasonable mean. For example, Bill is the richest man in the world. His computer skill is from his studying hard, which is not inherent. So not exaggeratedly, children who study hard will be a genius.

Personally, I argue that we should teach all children in same class. Because talent is a thing that is very hard defined. If people just rely on some IQ tests to distinguish abilities of children, which will be too simple to determine capacities of kids. In addition to this, even although there are some talent children in the class and other children can learn useful things from them. Subsequently, talent children will become model for other children, which make average child study harder.

To sum up, teaching all types of children in same class will be beneficial for therm. Meanwhile, we should not neglect effect of teaching talented along.

2. MOD comment:One topic at one time please
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