Writing Feedback / 'People are too busy' - Some prefer to spend their free time outdoors [4]

Hi! Here is my TOFEL essay!
Some people prefer to spend their free time outdoors. Other people prefer to spend their leisure time indoors. Would you prefer to be outside or would you prefer to be inside for your leisure activities? Use specific reasons and examples to explain your choice.

People are so busy at the present age, we have to focus on the job or the school works. We all need to use the free time to do some leisure activities for balance our life. Some people like outdoor activities, and some others prefer indoor activities. It is hard to say that, which one is the better one. In my point of view, I prefer outdoor activities. There are some clear reasons, and I will explore these.

First of all, I like surfing when summer comes. Every time when I go to the beach, I feel so comfortable and relax. Sunshine and sea always make me happy. I always can make a friend with other people, because people got there all have the same purpose. They just want to relax and surfing, hence, I can talk with them easily. I like talking with other people, because I can learn many different things. No matter is about surfing or something else.

Secondly, basketball is my favorite ball game. I often play basketball with my friends and we play well. My friends and I seldom meet each others, because we all busy in our works. Hence, we shared our recently life with each others during the basketball game, and got a drink when the game was over. We all miss our school life and we getting old, so we always play basketball on every Sunday.

Thirdly, I think doing some exercises is very good for health. People have big pressure from their work, so I think exercises are very important for everyone. If you can earn a lot of money, but you health is very bad. Then, you should change your life style. Just like my father, he was work very hard, but he did not do any exercises. His health was getting worse, we all worried about him. Fortunately, he realized health is the most important thing. Now, he plays golf every weekend. I am so happy about that, because he is happy when he playing golf.

In conclusion, I think no matter indoor or outdoor activities are all good for us. We all need to release pressure via those leisure activities, because life is not only about work but also need some interesting things.

Writing Feedback / Only the minority of people can learn by themselves; 'better to have a teacher' [4]

When it comes to education, the majority of people believe that education is a life time study. Even when we graduated from school, we should keep learning. In my point of view, a good teacher would change our life. Why I said that, because a good teacher not only can help your academic goal success, but also change your core value. There are some clear reasons, and I will explore it.

First of all, people learn by themselves, maybe they can have the same academic progress with school education. But, that will spend a lot of time to learn by themselves. Especially for math problems, when we have some calculation problems, the teacher can help us to solve problem faster. For me, when I was a high school student, my calculate ability was very bad. Fortunately, my math teacher eliminated my blind point in my calculation, and made me had confidence in math. I am very appreciate my math teacher, because she foster my math ability.

Secondly, studying is not the most important thing for students, learning moral merits is more important than studying. If some young people thought if they made a good grade they can do anything then. That was totally wrong! Hence, school teachers should teach their students have a positive value. Students must be learning honest, charity, humble...etc. At present society, many people only think how to earn more money, they became selfish and elegant. Judge people by their car and bank deposit. That was pity.

Lastly, not everyone can keep learning by themselves. The teacher can help us to keep focus on our studying, learning different course step by step. Imaging a 10 years old kid study itself, how can he focus on his book? He would distract by TV and comic books. Finally, he cannot learn anything. Furthermore, parents have to work to support their family; they have no time to teach their children. Children going to school have to face peer pressure, which will let them keep moving on their academic.

In conclusion, I think only the minority of people can learn by themselves, because they have a different background from others. So, I think it is better to have a teacher in our school life.

Hope you can correct me!!

Best Regard!!

Writing Feedback / His name represents the basketball. Michael Jordan was a legend. [4]

Hi~ I wrote this essay in 30 mins, hope you can give me some advices.
Thanks a lot!!

If I have a chance to meet a famous person, I want to meet Michael Jordan, because I love playing basketball. Michael Jordan was a legend. His name represents the basketball. Here is my opinion:

First of all, when I was a kid, one day I watching basketball game on television. That was my first time to know Michael Jordan, and I was so shack. Michael Jordan has an amazing skill and a great attitude. Maybe, some people will say that he was just lucky to get his talent, but I believe he has done many practice on his skill. That was encourages me to do more practice on basketball, and show the skill in the game.

Second, Michael Jordan has done many record, He leads his team to win NBA champion many times. I love watching NBA. Michael Jordan always make me surprise, because his confidence and bravity. He never give up in the basket game, even his team almost lose. I learned the attitude to face many difficult situations. When I was depressing, I always thought his attitude, that give me confidence to solve the problems.

Third, although Michael Jordan was retired, but people never forgot his achieved. So many basketball players want to challenge his achieved, because he is a basketball legend. Though I am not a basketball player, but I always play basketball in my free time. Basketball is my favorite sport, and I never stop to play it.

In conclusion, of course, there are many great basketball players in NBA, but Michael Jordan is my favorite one. Hence, I want to meet Michael Jordan if I could.

Word Count: 271

Writing Feedback / Learning about the past has many benefit for us; experience, virtues, wisdom [3]

HI~ I write this essay in 30 minutes. I think this essay is not very well, so I hope you can help me to improve it.

Thanks a lot!!

Some people believe that learning about the past was useless in the present. In my point of view, learning the past has many merits for us. There are some clear reasons and I will explore it.

First of all, learning the experience from the past can help us to save money and time. For example, according to the history of World War 2, people realized the violence could not solve any problems. The war just caused many people died. As a consequence, we all know the value of peace and the result of war.

Secondly, parents and teachers often teach moral virtues for the children by telling a story. Many stories was spreading generation by generation, those story always include some virtues, like honesty, brave and charity. For instance, when I was a kid, my mom always told a story for me before I went to sleep. I learn those virtues from different stories that were helping me to become a good person.

Lastly, learning the new technology is important too, but if we combine with ancestor's wisdom and culture; we can come up with some amazing ideas. Our ancestors were living in a simple life; they had faced many difficult situations. Those wisdoms were accumulation of experience from the past.

In conclusion, because of the experience, virtues and wisdoms, I think learning about the past has many benefit for us, so I disagree the statement.

Writing Feedback / TOEFL: Important to be able to work with a group of people or independently? [5]

Is it more important to be able to work with a group of people on a team or to work independently? Use reasons and specific examples to support your answer.

Some people like working alone, because they do not like discuss with others. In my point of view, I think discuss with others is a good way to achieve a goal. Hence, I like work with a group of people, because it can finish the work much more easily. There are numerous clear reasons and I would explore some important ones here.

First of all, working with a team will much more efficient. Group members can share different works. For example, when I was a student, I often finished the project with my classmates. We have a team, so the cooperation plays an important role for a good project. Some members collected data and others do different work. If I have to finish this project alone, then I would spend a lot of time.

Secondly, according to team work, I can learn many merits from others and improve my disadvantages. Some people have a great attitude to solve many difficult problems, like patience and honor. That will help me a lot. For another thing, some of my good friends were my group members in school, because we work together for a long time, so we know each other. We have some special memories when we work together.

Thirdly, people will argue with others sometimes, maybe it will delay the process of work and make us unhappy, but this is an important thing that we have to learn. Society is a big group; we have learned to receive other's opinion. Sometimes, the confidence will blind us mind and judge other's opinion. Cooperating with others can help us to be a great person and success in the future.

In conclusion, cooperation is an important virtue that we have to learn. If we do not know how to work with others, maybe we will become a selfish person.

So, I strongly agree that work with a group of people is more important.

Writing Feedback / TOEFL:I strongly agree that government should improve public transportation [3]

Should governments spend more money on improving roads and highways, or should governments spend more money on improving public transportation (buses, trains, subways)? Why? Use specific reasons and details to develop your essay.

Some people say improving roads and highways is most important to solve the traffic problem, but most people did not have a car. Hence, in my opinion, I think improving public transportation is most benefic to most people.

First of all, a good public transportation can help people to save many time, they do not waste time on waiting the red light or to find a parking lot. For another thing, having too many cars on the road is the major factor to cause the traffic problem, because some of drivers do not follow the traffic rule. Pedestrians often face this dangerous road condition; they have meticulous cross the road. The car accident happened in every month. Many young men were died in the car accident. That was broken many family.

Secondly, a city has a convenient public transportation will attract many people from other city, because they can take the bus or subway to work instead of driving car. That is helping them to save money and time, and they can use the money and time to do other things. As a consequence, many companies will establish in the city for attract those talent employee, and that will help the city more prosperous. People can find a job easily.

Thirdly, the crowd traffic makes noise and air pollution. People are suffering from those problems in the city. Just like me, when I am studying, I cannot focus on my book, because my nose is runny and the distracting noise is influence me. A good public transportation will solve those problems; people can live in a good environment. For another thing, a complete transportation will attract many tourists, because tourists do not understand the street and road where they visit it first time. An accessible public transportation can guide the tourist to many places. That will promote the city's reputation.

Above that, I strongly agree that the government should spend money on improving public transportation.

Writing Feedback / First of all, a healthy mental and body is prerequisite to succeed - TOEFL [5]

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Universities should give the same amount of money to their student's sports activities as they give to their university libraries. Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion.

I love playing basketball. I am a basketball player when I study in university. Even I graduated from the university; I often play basketball with my friends when I am free. For my opinion, I think sport activities have many advantages to students.

First of all, a healthy mental and body is prerequisite to succeed. Some of achieved people have no time to do exercises. They often feel tired and unhappy, even they are rich. Sport can helps us to build a strong body. University is not only helps students to learn knowledge, but also provide a surrounding to develop a sport custom. Have a sport custom can helps us to keep heath.

Secondly, students can learn many things by sport games. Like cooperation, honor and competition. For example, students can learn team work and competition by a basketball game, because basketball game is not a personal game. If a basketball team wants to win a game, the team work plays an important; role not a scorer. We all know knowledge is very important, but team work is important too. Team work helps people to solve many problems, if a man has a high level in his field, but if he does not know how to work with others then he will not succeed.

Thirdly, through to hold some sport games can helps universities to promote their reputation. A good school team can makes students to prude of their university. Furthermore, students can exchange different school cultures and experiences by the game contest. That will expands student's view and makes friends with others.

In conclusion, of course libraries are very important to universities, but university is not only a place that we learn the knowledge. Above that, I strongly agree with this statement.

Writing Feedback / TOEFL: Living in a big city has many merit and some disadvantages! [7]

I grew up in a big city, Taipei. I love live in this big city. But some people prefer to live in a small town, enjoy a rural life. There have both advantage and disadvantage in big city. Here is my opinion:

First of all, the main advantage in live in a big city is the job chance. For the one hand, live in a big city has more chance to find a job. For example, when a young man graduated from a university, he often finds a job in a big city. Because of many companies are established in a big city. There are few chance in a small town. In the other way, many people were moved to big city from a small town or other country. Hence, live in the big city has a lot of chance to contact different culture. That will helps us have a different view to face many things.

Secondly, live in a big city is very convenience. When I want to watching a movie. I just take a metro or a bus to the theater. Because of the transport system is very complete and fast. Furthermore, in the city there have many museums and department stores. People have many places to go when they have a holiday. Life in city is more colorful.

Thirdly, there also have some disadvantages in the big city. The big city often has serious air pollution. And the expense is often high. Hence, some people are prefer to live in a small town. For one thing, live in a small town, people often know each other. Not like in city, people don't know each other even the neighbors. And the life expense is not so high. There have different beautiful scene and fresh air.

In conclusion, live in a big city has many merit and some disadvantages. For me, I love live in a big city. When I old, maybe I will move to a small town to enjoy a simple life.

Writing Feedback / TOEFL: "couch potato"; How do movies or television influence people's behavior? [NEW]

Watching television and movie are become a common entertainment in our daily life. In my opinion, movies and television were influence us in daily life. Here is my opinion:

First of all, we can learn news by watching television and learn different culture and history by watching movie. Nowadays, we have many choices on TV programs. We can watch program what we want to watch anytime. That was helps us to contact the world. For example, when a busy man has no time to watch NBA live, he can watch replay when he finished his work.

Secondly, for negative effect, some people are watching TV and movies overly. They don't want to do other activity in their leisurely time. For one thing, they rather watch variety TV programs and movies at home than going outside to do some exercise. Some people call them "couch potato". Those people often have social problem. They cannot make a friend to others easily. Some TV programs and movies have violent and sex theme. That was always influence young men and kids. Because of they would imitate the act in movie. When the actor smoking cigarette in the movie but not in real life. Some young men will learn to smoke. Because of they thought that is cool. Furthermore, some movies were talking about gangster and the gangster always has a colorful life in the movie. It would led the children want to imitate it and join a gang to become a gangster. As the consequence, make a lot of problems in the society.

Thirdly, Of course, television and movies have a positive effect. We can learn knowledge by watching educated programs. Like "Discovery" and "National Geography". Some kinds of program have a lot of theme. We can learn different knowledge from different fields. Parents can use those programs to evoke their children's interesting to learn new knowledge.

In conclusion, television and movies have both positive and negative effects. It is influence us deeply.

Writing Feedback / TOEFL: What I would change in my hometown if I could [5]

If you could change one important thing about your hometown, what would you change? Use reasons and specific examples to support your answer.

Everything in the universe is in constant change. We are in an innovative world. Many people have a great enterprise to change the world. If I could change one important thing about my hometown. I will improve the environment in my hometown. Because of I think a good environment is the most important thing.

A polluted environment will injure our health chronically and some of illnesses are lethally. Having a lot of money can't bring your health back. The air pollution is a serious problem in my country. It led many people have respiratory illness. Including me, it is bother me in a long time. When I am study, I was deeply affected by the running nose. Not only me, but also others have this problem. If the environment can become better that my problem will be solved.

Furthermore, a good environment will attract a lot of tourists. For one thing, tourists want to visit a beautiful place for vacation. They don't want a dirty place to go.There have many beaches in my country. But some of beaches were polluted. If the beaches become clean and develop well. I think it can be a famous place. Tourist can have a good time in my country. As a consequence, many hotel and store will be established for the tourist. Many people can find a job; students can find a part time job on their summer vacation. That will improve the economy in the community nearby.

In conclusion, a good environment will improve our health and bring my hometown to a higher prosperity level. Those beautiful places will become famous in the world. Make our people be proud of our country.

Above that, it is necessary to improve the environment.

Writing Feedback / Factory is always links to the pollution problem [2]

Factory is always links to the pollution problem. Especially for the present, because of people have focus on this issue today. The technology has developed to a mature rank in this age. Some of problems about the pollution have to solve it. The air pollution can control in a safe range. Furthermore, a factory can provide a lot of jobs. That will help those people who near the factory have a working chance. So in my opinion, I support it.

Maybe some people will say the factory often to destroy the environment. But if the factory's manager can improves the environment. This problem can solve it. The most important thing is the job. Many cities have face the population migrates to other city. For one thing, some of young man can't find a job in their hometown. That was destroying the balance of cities. This is a serious problem in my country. If this problem couldn't change it. It will lead to many social problems. Young man lost their chance to support their family. They maybe find another way to earn money. Dealing drugs or joining a gang. They have no way to change their life.

For another thing, have a large factory near the community can helps the community's economy. That will have a lot of stores to provide the workers whom work in the factory. Like medicine store, restaurant, clinic. Some kind of store also helps residents of the community, and brings the community to a prosperity level. As the consequence, the life quality has to improve. The young men have a goal to try. Furthermore, if the factory has made a good profit, maybe the factory will gives the community some feedbacks. Provide a scholarship for the student. Helping them have a chance to get a high level of education. Building a library or a hospital will make the residents more convenience. Those things are important for the community.

In conclusion, building a large factory also has some disadvantages. But in my opinion, the advantage is the most important. Those advantages will improve the community.

Above that, I strongly support it.