Writing Feedback / People, events that change the way you're thinking [4]

Topic: persons, events that change the way you thinking?how?
Essay:

"We had an agreement before our marriage, do you remember?" I continued on, "our family is included you and I and our children." My voice was heavy saying each word. "But I am theirs only son, how could I say no." "Besides, they had financially helped us with this house's down payment", he went on. "Ok! They might move in and stay until I save up to pay back my debt." I finished my sentence, slammed the door, and darted out, leaving my husband with a soft sighing. That was the conversation two years ago between my husband and me when we had a disagreement about letting my parents-in-law move in to live with us. Two years later, I quickly recognized how wrong I was when I initially though living with parents-in-law is a burden and would limit my living freedom.

As soon as my parents-in-law moved in, I had an attitude against them. I talked to them only when I was asked and avoided them as much as possible. I guess my parents-in-law recognized how I felt when I looked into their sad eyes. Despite my behavior, they treated me appropriately in their smart way, especially the mother. She engaged me in conversation, trying to avoid closed-ended questions; rather, she often started with "How do you ..." or "what do you think about...", for example. At first, I reluctantly answered in short statement, but gradually my loquacious personality was revealed, confiding in her any problem that would bother me, looking for her useful advice.

I was not only felt comfortable in speaking with my parents-in-law but also appreciated them for sharing chores in the house. My father-in-law vacuumed at least once a week, washed the dishes, and watered the garden. Since they had moved in, my canned-foods were eliminated, substituting with variety of fresh products which benefit our health significantly. My mother-in-law and I, both were sharing the cooking, but most of the time my mother-in-law was in charge, and I was her helper. Most importantly that was not only our meals tasted better and healthier, but the comfortable atmosphere it gave at dinner time. My children were no longer flopped in the couch with pizzas in their hands and eyes on the television. My husband kicked the habit of eating dinner while working with his computer. The kids prepared the table, and we all ate in our dining room and shared information during the day. Eventually, we showed our children the value of family and taught them respecting parents as they grow old. Through these conversations, I learned what had happened to my children and could be able to help with their trouble.

I haven't thanked enough to my parents-in-law for their physical and financial helps. I just have been noticed that they are now parts of my life, like my husband and children. They often take a weekend-get-away, so that my husband and I and our children have a private time together. However, their absences are not necessary to me anymore but remind me of how important they are in our family. I realize how selfish and shallow I was when not included parents as family members. I have learned not only the idea of giving back to my parents in exchange for their cares and conditional love, but also of deriving from them a sense of spirit.

I'm not often starting my essay with dialogue. This practice essay is my first time to try writing differently the way I write. Please give me any comments on it. I'm preciated for your help

Letters / school records specialist-cover letter [6]

Please help me with my cover letter- this is a serious job; the job that I have always dreamt of. They require the knowlege of data entry and working in school environment, which I'm qualify for both, but I don't know how to express in a cover letter.

Dear Human Resource Director:

I am interested in a student records specialist position at your school district. Upon my first year at -------University, I worked at ------company as a general clerk, including account receivable for part-time. It took me three years fishing my bachelor of art degree in mathematics at --- University. After my graduation, -----company offered me a full time job until the company was moved recently. Beginning of my sixth year at----company, I reduced my time to 30 hours a week because I want to see for a different working environment. Fortunately I was hired to work for -----school district as a classroom special aide. The more I am exposed with school environment, the more I feel interested about it.

----company served as a nonprofit organization for the elderly, and I was able to manage over two thousand client confidential records. I interviewed them upon their registration to determine if they were qualified to be a member. I worked financially with the funeral house in case if my clients have no beneficiary. I helped fill out paper work and housing related, translated, and contacted a social agency if needed. As an account receivable, I used Excel spreadsheet to keep record for each client as well as use it to send out monthly billing statement. General office work such as data entry, filing, schedule meeting were also part of my duties Meanwhile, working as a part-time para-educator completely drives me to a very different way. I work daily in a special classroom with autistic children. From this job, I have been realized that helping people with mentally need is much harder than helping people with physically need. However, I take pleasure on the job seeing my students have their hard time at the beginning at school year and be able to meet their goals at the end of the year; it is a big reward for me seeing my students making progress. Working at school environment not only it gives me a chance to meet young people but also it allows me to talk to principal, school teachers, speech therapy, OT, and others professions in order to conduct a better learning.

With my rich experiences and education, I believe I will be a positive addition to------ school district. I am looking forward to the opportunity to contribute my qualifications. If you have any other available position vacancies or any additional information with on my qualifications, please contact me at ---- or my cell ------. Thank you very much for your consideration.

Respectfully,

Kathy Hinh
Enclosure: Résumé

Letters / 'in order to be a successful educator...' - One paragraph of mine introduce letter [3]

Dear all, this is my one of the paragraphs from my previous introduced letter. However, please help me with this. Thanks so much for time

Shortly after my graduation, I was looking for a teaching job that best fitted my education and experience. Fortunately I was hired by the XX High School District as a student attendant position for two years. This job made me realizes that in order to be a successful educator, besides my education and experience, I need to bring a great deal of passion in it. My career path shifted when left the job for my child-bearing for a short period of time. However, I was fortunate hired by the Alum Rock School District as a para-educator II and have been working for them ever since.

Writing Feedback / college education is necessary in the U.S society [2]

Hi all
This is my practice writing, please make any corrections. Thanks you for your time
Topic: do you think college education is necessay for success the U.S society?
Response:
Almost all people determine to succeed and endeavor to reach their goal. For example, some people, after finishing high school, look for a job because they might think that this is the shortest way for them to save up. Others believe that college education prepares them a solid knowledge base of any careers; hence, they will choose to pursue higher education before starting their jobs. Although those people may delay their working many years later, they will have more chance of success than of those who don't possess a college degree. Therefore, I truly believe that college education is necessary for success in the U.S society.

First of all, almost high-paid salary jobs require a college degree. Even though, some employers may announce that a few years of job experience can be equivalence with a college degree. In fact, when they view the applications, they would have more interest on applicants with having college degree than of those who don't. Besides, many professional organizations often require supporting documents such as introduction letter, letter of purpose, or resume rather than a single sheet filled-out application, and college level candidates would have more a chance of calling for an interview because they already master the writing techniques in their class. In the same way, they also learn about how to get impressed to interviewers as well.

Secondly, having college education would be an advance for people at work. They understand and master methodologies and concepts before coming into practicing. When two workers, for example, operate their machines, and all of a sudden, these machines break down and stop working. Eventually, a college level person would probably know what's wrong with the machine, and he even has ideas of how to handle the problem before coming for a machine checkup. At the same time, the other worker, without having mechanical education, would fumble hours through the machine, checking for a defect. This implies that higher education would help a person solve problem quickly and effortlessly. Furthermore, if a company offers training class or project to employees, people with former education are likely would be the faster learners. Obviously, their high performance would help them having a promotion at work.

Some opponents claim that a non-college study person could successfully hold a high position at work. This is quite true to some extent; however, this person has to spend twice as much time as compared with educated people. He might suspend his precious time with family and friends and skip many enjoyable activities in order to complete his work. Ultimately, he would slowly ebb away his relationships and lose his own pleasurable time. And even worse, when a company has a downtime, he is likely getting in a laid-off list. To illustrate, a casher has been working at a retail store for ten years could be promoted for a manager position. Yet, a new graduate in management degree could be paid the same salary range with a ten years working person.

There are some other ways to become success such as learning from life experience or working hard to manage a better life; however, if people choose to follow these ways, they have to be tough planners or born talented, or else, they would easily trip off the plans. Although some people feel that college study can be wasted time in life, having standard foundation of knowledge is a necessary part for one's success.