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Posts by babygurl2012 [Suspended]
Joined: Dec 18, 2011
Last Post: Dec 27, 2011
Threads: 4
Posts: 15  

From: United States of America

Displayed posts: 19
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babygurl2012   
Dec 27, 2011
Undergraduate / 'a maroon elephant' - Johns Hopkins- Additional Interests [20]

This is a unique essay! I loved your idea and you sound truly genuine. Johns Hopkins will love your originality and see your interests!

I am applying as well, it's a great school! Good Luck (:
babygurl2012   
Dec 27, 2011
Undergraduate / 'endless activities' - Why NYU? Supplement [7]

Remember to relay it back to you and I loved your ending. I agree with pinkbunny, you want to grow and discover you interest and I believe NYU will truly love that!
babygurl2012   
Dec 27, 2011
Undergraduate / 'volunteering in the Cardiology Clinic' - COMMON APP SHORT [13]

More elaboration will do the trick. Talk about a specific impact in order to outline the significance of the experience. Your ideas are good and volunteering always helps on any college app!
babygurl2012   
Dec 27, 2011
Undergraduate / Blind, Arrogant Eyes - Common App Prompt [5]

Wow! You are one of a kind. I like how you admit to the arrogance in your beginning high school career! It shows your growth.
babygurl2012   
Dec 20, 2011
Undergraduate / 'my father's diagnosis' - Georgetown Personal Essay [5]

An impeccable determination, mixed with a dose of pure hope; describes my father's legacy. Cancer was the most difficult challenge my father had ever faced and yet his resilience to keep fighting overpowered the disease.

Before my father's diagnosis, I pretended to be a physician and treated make believe diseases. My father always chuckled at my silly treatments and played along with the game. A few years later, the pretend games we once played faded away when reality finally struck. My father was diagnosed with stomach cancer and needed real life physicians to assess his treatment. The team of physicians who handled my father's care became my superheroes. The days where I played make believe were destined to become a reality as the doctors' plight on my father's behalf inspired my desire to pursue a career in medicine.

Visiting my father in the hospital was horrifying at first. His body was weakened by the chemotherapy and I was weakened by the sight of his demeanor. There was no light and the room felt cold. I shivered and my father simply smiled. My fear turned into determination, I was in this battle as well and my tears faded. I soon began to discover my surroundings; I saw interesting machines that made noises, echoes of happiness came from the surgical ward and children came out from their vaccinations with smiles on their faces. I soon began to witness the inspiring feats performed by different physicians. My faith in medicine became even stronger because I discovered humanity's greatest strength in a hospital because it provided compelling evidence of new horizons and hope. Innovative research, new medical technology, life saving treatments and miracles that prove extraordinary things can happen, all came together and overpowered the notion of death.

As my father laid on his deathbed, he rested with a smile on his face. The light glimmered through the window and he reminded me why life is gift. My anger turned to compassion, even though I was only eleven a new light was exposed. The darkness had faded and my father left our world in serenity. At the same time of his passing a mother of two survived a heartache, a new baby girl was brought into this world and a war veteran was able to walk again. These amazing events were why my father passed with a smile on his face. He knew that the darkness grew weak as the light illuminated.

In humanity's weakest moments, we find hope, and my father was my hope. His battle with cancer has motivated my future pursuits. I discovered my dreams within a hospital and want to show the world how one girl's life can go from diagnosing make believe diseases to changing the face of medicine.

This is just a rough draft! Any feedback would be great! I really, really want to go to Georgetown (:
babygurl2012   
Dec 18, 2011
Undergraduate / 'Choreography allows me to purse dance' - Johns Hopkins- Tell us about yourself [2]

Freedom to move passionately in order to purse an exceptional performance. Choreography is my pastime. Work, volunteering, academics, and extracurricular activities lead my busy schedule, but in the midst of it all I still indulge within my love of dance.

Before my family hit financial hardships I was a competitive cheerleader and loved the rush I felt during a performance. I still hold onto my love of dance and in my spare time choreograph my own routines. Music works in wonderful ways because it provides the balance and rhythm I need to produce an entertaining routine. My choreography represents my style and personality. I stay true to my methods and share my dances with other aspiring performers.

Every few months at Cypress Academy I get to teach my routines to a group of girls whose family's struggle financially and can't afford dance classes. Having been in the same shoes as them, I became their dance teacher and gave them the chance to dance as performers and forget about the worries at home. As a young girl, I did not have the same opportunities to pursue my desires, and the girls I choreograph are true talents because they don't let struggles stand in the way of their pursuits.

Dance unites us all together because movement is universal. Choreography allows me to purse dance in my own way and instructing others in the art of dance is an honor because our passion for dance overrides the adversity which surrounds us.
babygurl2012   
Dec 18, 2011
Undergraduate / 'to fuse the history of medicine' - Johns Hopkins- why you chose course of study [3]

Majoring in History while also pursuing a pre-medical track within the Krieger School of Arts and Sciences will allow me to leave a lasting impression on humanity. History intertwines the tales of our past in order to form a chain of events. I seek to understand the intricacies of this very chain and relay the lessons of our past to the future because I strive to benefit our global society by practicing medicine.

My desire is to fuse the history of medicine with the future and take part in new innovations that change lives. Our past makes use human, the mistakes and triumphs throughout history have defined man's character; the humanity behind this discipline intrigues me and validates my desire to become a physician.

My pre-med pursuit will provide a cohesive unit of the necessary science courses.
I want to focus on the human side of sciences in order to prove that there is still hope in a field where physicians sometimes forget the humanity in patients and opt to treat the disease instead of the individual. I want to make a difference in the future when I treat patients by approaching them as the person they are instead of the disease from which they suffer.

I aim to form a link in both disciplines in order to benefit my career path, the intricate mix of studies that I plan to pursue will come together and permit me to discover the humanity in today's world and apply these lessons to the future in the field of medicine.
babygurl2012   
Dec 18, 2011
Student Talk / What are my chances to get into the following schools? [16]

You seem to have a pretty good shot. Make sure you have good safeties where you will be happy attending. Your scores and grades are in range. Just talk about your passions and make yourself standout in the admissions process!
babygurl2012   
Dec 18, 2011
Undergraduate / 'to pursue a human undertaking' - Georgetown significant activity essay [8]

The power of unity signifies humanity's desire for change. Our personal desires may sometimes forge a sense of importance but when our world is ailing, uniting as one can create waves of impact. I have witnessed a similar impact through my involvement within the Health Occupants Students of America Organization, (HOSA).

Our club encourages members to pursue a humanitarian cause in order to provide a helping hand within our world. This philosophy has provided the motivation for me to reach out to my generation in order to help inspire others to create change. A new beginning arrived with my senior year, when I took the initiative and launched The Water Project Chapter within my high school. After viewing news stories about the lack of clean drinking water in third world countries, I felt compelled to take a stand and speak up for my generation. Thousands of teenagers in Africa are dying due to dehydration; a simple issue which could be fixed. I was drawn to one particular story of sacrifice where a teenage boy gave up his water in order to quench the thirst of his pregnant mother. He inspired me to help bring the Water Project to my high school. HOSA provided me with the resources and members, to bring this global issue into perspective and create a chain of new beginnings for everyone involved.

My fellow HOSA members and I displayed bottles of dirty water to illustrate the difference between their water and ours. This helped outline the main reason for our campaign. We started small by setting up fundraisers where we sold bags of flavored popcorn and candy bars. Our efforts then expanded to selling hand made bracelets which stated, 'be the change'. This endeavor forever changed our campaign because we were able to raise enough funds for building three wells so families could have clean drinking water.

The Water Project brought our entire organization together as one body for change. Providing a helping hand to others is the legacy we want to leave behind in order to motivate future generations to take the stand that we took. Our mission is to influence others to help remedy some of the issues within our world, and The Water Project aims to do just that.
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