Undergraduate / admission essay: raise student achievement [2]

This has been revised from my previous version.
Suggestions on how t o make this essay better. Should I take some out or elaborate on something?

The greatest obstacle I expect to encounter as I raise student achievement in a high-need school would be overcoming disengagement due to the lack of a personalized lesson plan. Based on my experiences as a student, peer, and substitute teacher in high-need classrooms, the absence of tailored instruction can be an impediment. My brother's educational experiences were dictated by an attitude of presumed failure. My own disenchantment with school was due to the absence of a challenge. Both of these commonalities lacked personal instruction and are a contributors to achievement potential. As students we often felt that were lost in the crowd, which progressed into a denouncement of ownership in our educational endeavors. In order to tackle this challenge, I will assess and adapt to each student's level of ability and learning strengths. I will design lesson plans that engage every learning style and establish clear milestones to track students' academic progress.

My older brother had measurable learning disabilities as a young child. By the time he entered high school, he had become so hardened by his inability to process materials in the manner presented that he withdrew. Broken, he literally ran from school, never to return. As a substitute teacher I witnessed instructors overwhelmed with the varying skills sets present in the classroom. Addressing these deficits is difficult and time consuming for teachers and students alike. Too often this compounding issue is ignored; the teacher continues to introduce new material, hoping that students will strengthen their base skills independently. As exemplified by my brother, this approach causes frustration and compounds insecurity.

From my experience as a junior high and high school student, I demonstrated that many students in a high-need demographic are initially enthusiastic about learning, but find that they can be get good grades by only skimming through the material. As a student, I felt that my abilities were not acknowledged and wouldn't actualize my future. I disconnected by opting to attend an independent study program.

To acquire a balance where all students are challenged requires a component of one-on-one guidance. As a teacher, I will set high expectations for all students, knowing that all students can and will achieve in my classroom. With clear, written-out objectives, my personalized lesson plans will let students know what they are learning and what is expected of them. Assignments will be imbedded with learning goals to give students ample opportunity to practice new skills.

As a teacher, each lesson plan I design would be goal oriented, implementing structure in the classroom. I will engage the entire classroom to foster collaboration and heighten intellectual engagement among students. I will set the groundwork for students to simultaneously seek out assistance from their peers in areas where they need help as well as be consulted on subjects in which they feel comfortable. To build confidence in all learning approaches, I will encourage multiple paths to demonstrating content knowledge. This could include traditional methods such as completing a test or writing a paper, or a nontraditional medium such as designing a model or presenting a self-directed video. To attach value to material content, I will provide problems on subjects relevant to students' interests and provide real-life examples of implementation.

Within the school year, my goal to is to gradually strengthen the base interdisciplinary skills for all students through continued opportunities to bolster individuals' skills sets within specific lesson plans. In providing the framework and support to strengthen learning skills, students will increase their lifelong skill set and be afforded a successful future.

Writing Feedback / Why do you believe you will be an effective teacher in a high-need school? [3]

Nearly all Fellows are hired to teach in "high speed" schools that are located in low-income communities. Why do you want to teach in a high need school in New York City? Why do you believe you will be an effective teacher in a high-need school? 400-600 words

I blushed; it was like reading a love letter for the first time. "It was a pleasure having you in my class and you will continue to grow into a success in whatever career you choose." The yearbook inscription written by my sixth grade teacher, Mrs. Susie, stunned me. My heart raced: would I be a teacher, a scientist, a businesswoman? I smiled thinking of all the possibilities. Walking home from school, I read the passage over and over again, and I began to believe it. Even as an A student, this was the first time I was offered such educational encouragement, and it meant the world to me. My effectiveness as a high-needs schoolteacher will rely on my personal characteristics and perspective fostered from my unique background.

As a child of an economically struggling community, my educational path was unique. By my high school graduation, I had attended eleven schools, and I later graduated from the University of California, Berkeley. I was the first member of my family to graduate college. As a student at UC Berkeley, I was able to expand my view of both of the polar vantage points in our educational system. As I analyzed the outcomes of my family and grade school friends, none of whom put significant emphasis on education, the weight of these limitations became strikingly apparent.

Provoked in social theory courses, I desired to deepen my understanding of social disparity and expand my view of culture. To achieve this goal, I went on a journey to Ecuador to acquire tangible experiences to supplement my otherwise ordinary social-theory research. Working as a volunteer naturalist educator, I found myself at the high end of the socioeconomic status. I was the "privileged" foreigner, looking in at the lack of social mobility available to others.

Reflection on my experiences and those of children in a developing nation revealed that the ill effect of poverty is broken through education. In my observations, I came to understand that the achievement gap continues across generational lines from a lack of parental, teacher, and/or community support. As a poor child, I did not believe that anything was possible; instead, I saw life as a series of inhibitors. Through quality teachers, I developed a more comprehensive perspective. I now view the instability of my youth as an unexpected contributor to my positive development. It has conditioned me to adapt to any situation with confidence.

Specifically, I wish to teach in New York City because the enormity of the school district makes it one of the most influential in the county. New York City schools are a Mecca of diversity, immigration, and assimilation of differing cultural ideas about education. I find working in a diverse demographic a mutually beneficial process, as I learn invaluable lessons through the interchange of perspective.

Flexibility enables me to search for my own understanding; I have the ability to look at issues in a variety of ways. I urge others to also use facts as a beginning point, encouraging them to understand concepts on a personal level. Inquisitive in nature, I am a life-long learner, and I continue to gain knowledge in fields that I am involved with. Inspiration from Mrs. Susie allowed me to define my own future, and I will instill the same sense of opportunity in my students in order to make a positive, unique, and substantial contribution to our social fabric.

Graduate / Need perfection with this--Raising Student Achievement [2]

2. What is the greatest challenge you expect to encounter in raising student achievement in a high-need school? What do you believe would be your role, as a teacher, in addressing this challenge? Explain how your past experience informs your response to these questions. If applicable, please include personal, work, or volunteer experience with high-need communities. 400-600 words

Based on my experiences as a student and a peer in high-need classrooms, the greatest obstacle I expect to encounter as I raise student achievement in a high-need school would be overcoming disengagement due to lack of a personalized lesson plan. Observing an attitude of presumed failure in my brother's educational experiences and recollecting my own disenchantment due to the absence of challenge, portrays commonalities contributing to the achievement gap. Both circumstances lacked personal instruction, left us feeling lost in the crowd, progressing into a lack of ownership in our own educational endeavors. In order to tackle this challenge, I will assess and adapt to each students level of content mastery. I will design lesson plans that engage every student and establish clear milestones for their academic progress.

My older brother had measurable learning disabilities as a young child. By the time he had entered high school, he had become so hardened by his inability to process materials in the manner presented that he withdrew in defeat, literally running from school never to return. Addressing these deficits is difficult and time consuming. As a substitute teacher I witnessed instructors overwhelmed with the varying skills sets present in the classroom. Too often this compounding issue is ignored; the teacher continues to introduce new material, hoping that students will strengthen their base skills independently. As exemplified with my brother, this approach causes frustration and compounds insecurity.

From my experience as a junior high and high school student, I exemplified that many students in a high-need demographic are initially enthusiastic about learning, but find that they can be get good grades by only skimming through the material. As a student, I felt like my abilities were not acknowledged and wouldn't amount to anything. I disengaged by opting to attend an Independent Study program.

To acquire a balance where all students are challenged requires a component of one-on-one guidance. As a teacher, I will set high expectations for all students, knowing that all students can and will achieve in their classroom. With clear, written-out objectives, my personalized lesson plans let students know what they are learning and what is expected of them. Assignments will be imbedded with learning goals to give students ample opportunity to practice new skills.

As a teacher, each lesson plan I design would have short-term and long-term goals. In the short term, each lesson plan would engage the entire classroom. Fostering collaboration with other students with varying skill levels will heighten intellectual engagement amongst students. I would encourage students to simultaneously seek out assistance from their peers where they need help as well as serve as a resource for subjects in which they feel comfortable. Also I would provide multiple paths to demonstrating content knowledge, enabling all learning styles to excel. This could be traditional form like completing a test or writing a paper, or a nontraditional medium such as designing a model, or presenting a self-directed YouTube video. To attach value to material content, I would provide problems on subjects relevant to students' interests and provide real-life examples of implementation.

In the long term, my aim is to gradually bolster the base interdisciplinary skills through a continuing process of strengthening individual skills in specific lessons, moving from highly structured and guided assignments at the beginning of the term, to free form, inquiry-based projects by the end. My goal is to strengthen those skills so that they will be part of their lifelong skill set.

Writing Feedback / herbicide and pesticide use [2]

Question: How do you feel about the use of herbicides and pesticides?

Ideally, the problems lessened through the use of herbicides and pesticides will be remedied with alternative scientific practices that are more positive for the long-range health of the environment and humans.

Two main benefits are argued in support of the use of herbicides and pesticides: an increased food supply and the decrease in insect borne diseases. Farms treated with said contaminates do yield a larger food quantity, at least for the short term. Increasing the food supply would undoubtedly better the lives of some at-need people, however, I see food supply problems more of a distribution and overconsumption issue. Another advantage to their use is a reduction in malaria, bubonic plague and typhus. Many lives are saved from killing insects that carry such diseases with herbicides and pesticides; however, there are alternative methods to containing insect borne diseases.

There are many negative results of the use of herbicides and pesticides. These effects are unknown in their entirety and appear to increase in severity over time. The destructive path has been observed to be non-self containing, spreading throughout ecosystems. The cycle starts with rain carrying key elements: nitrogen and phosphorous, into waterways. Algae growth is accelerated and nutrient rich algae blocks sunlight, killing aquatic animals below. Bacteria consumes these dead animals and organisms, this decreases oxygen levels in the water and causes more aquatic life to suffocate. Chemicals are passed through biomagnification; meaning that predators get chemicals in their tissues at a higher rate. This process damages the food chain from the bottom to the top. Additionally, genetic resistance occurs, less biological plant variety in leads to weakened food security. All aspects of the ecosystem are unbalanced due to the use of herbicides and pesticides. For these reasons, I do not view their use a sustainable and responsible approach.

Graduate / Personal Statement for Peace Corp!! [2]

Please let me know what out think about this essay, changes needed and editing. Also, this does have a word cap of 500 words, anywhere you can see that I am using unessesary words. Thanks!!

Peace Corps question #2.
Motivational Statement: Why do you want to join the Peace Corps? What past experiences have given you this motivation? How do you see this fitting into your life goals? How do you expect to satisfy the Peace Corps 10 core expectations- be specific about expectations you anticipate to find the most challenging and how you plan to overcome these challenges.

I would like the opportunity to serve as a teacher for the Peace Corp's; my motivation in pursuing this endeavor is to positively contribute the lives of my future students and community members. In this global world, I aspire to show the diplomatic nature of the US, through an exchange at a grassroots level. Being that growth is attained through the reciprocity, I look forward to acquiring the cultural and practical knowledge offered by my new community.

In addition to giving back to society, I know my service experience will also offer betterment in my personal and professional development. I have always had a keen interest in culture and have discovered that when I step outside a comfort zone, I learn invaluable lessons about myself through my interactions with others. Simple day-to-day occurrences are intriguing; like speaking another language and observing idiosyncrasies. Viewing life this way, as an absorbent child does, grants me humility and joy. I hope to deepen my understanding of human nature and apply this knowledge to my classrooms during and after service. The opportunity to expand my cultural awareness abroad, will undoubtedly, upon my return to the US, heighten the quality of my teaching and performance as a graduate student in Education.

My international ventures coupled with a non-traditional upbringing have paved way the for a successful Peace Corps service. Immersing myself in different cultures as a volunteer in Ecuador, student in Spain and traveler in Latin America and Morracco, has developed my perspective. As a result of being exposed to varied lifestyles, beginning at childhood, I have become an adaptable person. I was born into a communal coffee shack in Hawaii, my family lived a simple life; close to nature and without luxuries like plumbing. Also, our family relocated a lot, by the time I had graduated high school, I had attended eleven schools in several states. Believing that the whole world is my home and knowing that I can establish myself anywhere are ideas that are inherent to me.

I believe that although challenging, I will integrate easily into a foreign community and be able to satisfy the ten core expectations. If I had to isolate what would be the most difficult, (and thus provide the biggest potential for growth), it would be away from friends and family for 27 months. Even though I have not lived in the same city as my immediate family for 12 years, I do put much effort into the care and development of my young niece and nephew. I will miss them, but realize that two years in a foreign country, engrossed in my work, and in a constant state of learning, will pass by before I know it. I believe that the perspective I will return with will add richness to their lives, and perhaps broaden their ideas of the world.

The Peace Corps mission to promote peacemaking and friendship is something that I wholeheartedly admire and feel confident that I will embody as a volunteer. Through serving in the Peace Corps, I hope to progress the knowledge of others and myself in a positive global interchange.

Undergraduate / How did you adapt to one cross-cultural situation? What specific challenges... [2]

How did you adapt to one cross-cultural situation? What specific challenges did you face concerning trust, confidence and integration?

At the time South America seemed foreign in every since of the word. In an attempt to remain calm about the trip or perhaps just youthful naivety, I boarded the plane non-expectant without detailed knowledge of the country. However, I understood that Ecuador was considered "developing;" fortunately I had known of the full definition of this word. I embarked with aspirations of continuing research to contribute to my senior thesis, "Sustainability in Marginal Communities: A Latin Experience." I sought this unprecedented route for my final semester to engage in tangible experiences would add to my otherwise ordinary social-theory paper. What became a four-month Ecuadorian adventure has been my most significant cross-cultural undertaking, in which I assimilated with foreign culture and processed the definition of sustainability, surprised and driven by openness.

I first worked as an intern in the capital city of Guayaquil. Living with a local family allowed me to embrace the Ecuadorian culture while immersed in the Spanish language. In my free time, I would ride the bus to the city periphery and just wander. I observed distinct class systems; comparing affluent neighborhoods to patchwork shantytowns. Most startling was the unrealistic embrace of American culture. Salvaged and hand-constructed "McDonald's" signs attracted patrons into local restaurants; neighborhoods were named "Disneyland" and "Hollywood." It became quickly apparent how influential the role of the United States is on the cultural, economic and environmental sustainability of this country.

Mid-trip, I refocused in BaĂąos, the "Gateway to the Amazon." A naturalist at heart, with research interest in the regional oil industry, I found this experience to be a thorough transition. Volunteering as a naturalist, I spent my time assisting tour guides on treks into the Amazon Region. Spellbound by native knowledge of plants and their medicinal uses, I dove into the native lifestyle. Amidst this untamed land, again, disparity glared. Showcased as the world of value, America's presence screamed from billboards and products. The quality of human character that I admired here contrasted with the glorification of the complex "developed" world seems an unbalanced duality. The cultural aspect of Ecuadorian sustainability was in jeopardy.

My biggest concern was that my presence would magnify inequality in worldwide wealth and opportunity. As a "privileged" foreigner, integration was challenging. Was my presence sparking a feeling of inferiority within a culture that I learned so much from? Attention from friends and co-workers, just for being American, made me uncomfortable. In time, I became proud of my contribution to society. The negligent presence of western culture exemplified economic polarization; once I distinguished myself from this, I saw positive influence and integrated more easily. Perhaps, I even lessened the misconception of America for Ecuadorians and myself.

These experiences proved influential lessons on flexibility, still driving my life choices and beliefs. I am forever aware that my influence, however small, does make an impact that matters in the world. I witnessed firsthand small choices affecting life in a great way. Allowing myself to actively assimilate to these cross-cultural experiences with openness, I learned invaluable lessons about the world and myself.

Letters / Peace Corps teacher * resume suggestions [2]

Hi! This is the first time that I have combined my customer service resume with teaching and planning experience, I normally would have two separate resumes to be more direct. I am unsure of the impression that this combined resume gives. Looking to show skills as transferable in teaching for the Peace Corps. Suggestion on content and editing, please.

Objective: Serve in the Peace Corps as a teacher, aligning my desire for a life-altering volunteer experience with my long-term career goals.

Attributes:
Ability to adapt to different learning styles
Experience in diverse cultural backgrounds
Navigate challenging conditions Anticipate needs of others
Flexible attitude
Productive in independent and collaborative work

Experience:

Substitute Teacher
XXXXXX 11/12-current
Create an interactive learning environment for students of all ages and abilities. Engage in effective communication skills, innovative educational approaches to further student engagement and development. Work with students of all socioeconomic levels and English learners.

Personal Assistant
XXXX 1/12-11/12
Manage household operations: provide infant childcare, prepare nutritious meals. React quickly in emergency situations with sound judgment. Provide companionship, personal care and assist in adjusting to new lifestyles.

Restaurant Service
XXXXX 2/09-09/11
Provided excellent customer service. Flexible, can-do attitude: I was the only employee cross-trained as a restaurant bartender, dining room server and pool bartender. Worked independently with little supervision, trained seasonal staff. Managed bank with a daily blind-deposit, responsible for reconciling all tip payouts. Trained in alcohol awareness, extensive wine and product knowledge. Prioritized and executed tasks in a high-stress environment, initiating teamwork and customer satisfaction.

Substitute Teacher
XXXXXX 10/09-3/11
Fulfilled substitute assignments across most subject areas, effectively teaching kindergarten through 12th grade. Students were of varied academic levels and diverse cultural backgrounds. Instructed classes of as many as 30 students. Collaborated with teachers, administrators and parents on lessons and classroom management techniques. Facilitated a positive learning environment.

Wedding Service
XXXXX 3/09-3/11
Server for weddings, often-primary onsite contact for clients. Meticulous detail in: buffet set-up, table arrangements and food/beverage service. Diffused stressful situations daily. Employ strategic time management skills, ensuring that events ran smoothly and guests' expectations were fulfilled.

Restaurant Service
XXXX 7/05-11/08
Prioritized and executed tasks in a high-stress environment, initiating teamwork and customer satisfaction.
Engaged patrons as a dining room server, bartender and in event support. Trained new servers on cash handling and service standards. Supported the events coordinator in leading events and weddings, organized set-up and breakdown, and supervised staff.

Land Use Planner
XXXXX 4/07-3/08
Worked within regulations from multiple agencies, cities, and counties to obtain planning and building permits. Primary contact for clients, contractors, architects, and governmental agencies involved in commercial, conservation and residential projects. Created, reviewed and altered building and landscape plans. Managed 15 project deadlines concurrently. Represented clients in meetings with various governmental agencies and departments. Provided effective communication and conflict resolution.

Naturalist Teacher
XXXXX 4/06-6/06
Developed a good rapport with students, planned and supervised group-building activities. Demonstrated proficiency in outdoor skills. Taught throughout the state of California, in different ecosystems and habitats. Formulated lesson plans tailored to integrate classroom curriculum with local environment, human and natural history of the western United States.

Planning Technician, Planning Intern
XXXXX 10/06-4/07, 8/05-10/05
Conducted initial screening for all inquiries and complaints directed toward the planning department. Interpreted city ordinances and how they apply to specific projects. Reviewed all commercial and multi-family development applications submitted for completeness and compliance. Created and edited city documents.

Relevant Volunteer Work:

Volunteer Educator
XXXX 10/05-12/05 Taught students conservation, recycling and natural resource protection concepts. Led elementary students on educational tours of the eco-park. Delivered creative lessons explaining conservation to students who were hearing these ideas for the first time.

XXXX
Assisted guides in educational expeditions, which focused on native flora and fauna identifications, botany, and medicinal uses of Amazonian plants. Modernized webpage: nature photography, updates, and language translation.

Community Outreach Intern XXXXX 10/ 04- 05/ 05 Taught hands-on workshops on marsh and grassland remediation in the Richmond Field Station. Prepared educational materials and presented educational lessons to students on field trips. Independently and with community members: maintained native nursery, researched remediation techniques, and monitored results.

Education:

Bachelor of Arts, Interdisciplinary Studies Field Major. University of California Berkeley, December 2005. Thesis: "Sustainability in Marginal Communities: a Latin Experience."
Independent study abroad, Ecuador, Fall 2005

Associates, Liberal Arts and Spanish. Lake Tahoe Community College, June 2003.
Study Abroad, Spain, 2001

Certificate: 30 day Emergency Teaching Permit, Passed CBEST (California Basic Skills Test)

Letters / "flexibility" - Letter of Intent for Substitute Teacher [7]

Please accept this letter of interest and the additional enclosures as application for the Substitute Teacher position posted on EdJoin. I was particularly excited to see a position open with the Lake Tahoe Unified School District, as I would like to contribute to a mutually beneficial teaching experience within the district.

During my employment with Monterey Unified School District, I substitute taught most subjects and age groups. Adapting my teaching style and classroom management techniques to the particular classroom environment were skills that I strengthened with practice and teacher collaboration. One of my greatest strengths is flexibility. This provides the capacity to walk into an unknown learning environment, analysis and adjust to the situation, to foster a productive and eager classroom. My experiences have been cross-cultural, working with multi-linguistic learners from kindergarten to twelfth-grade, in advanced placement to special education classes. My varied professional endeavors meld prioritization, effective communication and multitasking skills with the ability to thrive in a high-pressure environment.

I believe you will find me to be a dedicated, flexible and nurturing educator who is determined to provide students opportunities to successfully learn. Thank you for your consideration, I look forward to meeting with you.