Writing Feedback / Equal Oppurtunity And Parity in Pay. GRE Analyze an issue [3]

Sorry I've been away for quite a while, I just needed a break to prevent my brain from burning out.

"Equal opportunity means parity in pay. Everyone should not earn the same amount of money, but it's ridiculous to see an athlete earning tens of millions of dollars in a single year while the average household income is slightly more than $50,000."

Discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the previous statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take.
In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement may or may not hold true and explain
how those considerations shape your position.

I partially agree with the given statement. I believe that it is right to assume and state that equal oppurtunity should mean equal pay,
However that equal pay is only acceptable under certain conditions, and fail if external factors are not properly considered, which I
will elaborate in my argument.

It is congenial to say that equal oppurtunity should mean equal, or at least similiar, wages. Since Jobs of equal stature, regardless
of where or within what entity the post is, usually entails prerequisite of knowledge or skill, equal responsibilty, and so on. Since the
burden entailed is the same, the wage should be the same as well. Also, it is justifiable that oppurtunities which are not equal should
differ in payment as well. Since the burden of two different posts may be completely different. If this is the case, then people having
two different oppurtunities should be paid differently.

However, equal opputunity does not necessarily mean that the parity in payment should always be maintained. Let us suppose there
are two people in the same position in a company. Both people have the same qualifications and shoulder the same burden. However,
If one person out-performs the other, or does overtime, or a combination of both, then the more productive person deserves a better pay
for bringing in contributing more to the body he/she works for, even though both people have the same oppurtunity.

Another reason why parity cannot sometimes be maintained is due to the fact that different commodities and services have different demands.
It is ubiquitous that some things simply sell far better than others. As such, it is illogical to simply assert that people of similar stature, regardless

of who or what they work for, should receive equal pay simply due to the burden. Cellphones may sell better than caviar.And therefore, it is

justifiable that workers in the cellphone industry earn more than the caviar firm/industry counterparts.

Considering the example given in the statement and using the argument from the aforementioned paragraph, it is perfectly acceptable that a
sportsman earns way more than the average household. A sportsman gets paid a lot by sponsors, simply because sponsors are able to sell
their entertainment so well. A sportsman gets a number of product endorsement and advertisement offers, which generate additional revenue.
For example - The eyes of the world are on players whenever an important football match is going on, and anyone who watches TV or uses the

internet can see that players get contracted for advertisement. Whereas the breadwinner from an average household simply works at a single job,
probably something that hundreds of people work at as well, has no product endorsement or anything similar.

Therefore, all in all, it is not equal oppurtunity that should equate to equal pay. But rather, pay is something that is more dependent on being

able to sell, being able to contribute and above all being productive. If two entities are equal in all these regards, only then may it be correct

to say the qual oppurtunity is tantamount to parity in payment.

Writing Feedback / GRE ; Advancing our understanding of the world [2]

"Teach Your Children to Question Whatever They are taught". Some of the
greatest breakthroughs in all fields, in all facets took place due to the
questioning of conventional and accepted wisdom, for example: the
heliocentricity of the solar system.

Accepted Wisdom is correct in mose cases and can be expreimented over and
over again for their validity. And in a lot of cases, Accepted wisdom goes a
long way to elucidate how the human milieu and the extant nature works, for
example: Newton's Laws to explain how objects move or why tides are higher
when the moon is visible. In fact, it is the universal infalliblity of
conventional wisdom which has led to more facts, and thus a better
understanding of our surroundings

However, as mentioned in the opening paragraph, some of humanity's greatest
breakthorughs were achieved simply because some people had the audacity to
question what was seemingly incontrovertible. These people, through
curiosity, deidcation and talent have not only challenged what was
universally accepted, but rather have gone through great lengths to define
the limits of conventional wisdom, concommitantly bringing about new data
and theories about nature and advancing out knowledge bank. These are the
breakthroughs with which humans have advanced the understanding of the world

For example, The Anciet Greeks believed in the geocentricity of the solar
system, and this knowledge has propagated for centuries up till the middle
ages. Then, Galileo and Copernicus, two famous astronomers made a huge
number of observations and calculations. They concluded that it was the
Earth that moved around the sun, not the other way around. Galileo and
Copernicus were both excommunicated by the Catholic church for what was
deemed heresy at that time. Centuries later when more advanced tools were
developed for better solar observation led to the vindication of these men.

Another example is Einstein. Einstein challenged Newton's Laws, proving that
these laws break down at high speeds. Newton's laws were accepted as
universal (and valid at all times). Einstein's work led to the development
of gravity as something that was completely different from what physicists
had previously known and accepted as. Einstein was shunned for his work on
relativity and time dilation. Today, Einstein's work allows us to have a
penetrating understanding of the universe we live in. In fact, Einstein's
work on general relativity allows us to have more accurate GPS systems.

Therefore, in the end. Accepted wisdom allows us to make a better sense of
the world. But it should be understood that even conventional wisom has its
own limitations, and thus need to be challenged to in order refine our
understanding of how our world works.

Writing Feedback / Petition to University administration/ GRE analyze [6]

The following appeared in a petition presented by Classen University students to the school's administration.

"The Purpose of higher education is to prepare students for the future, but Classen students are at a serious disadvantage in the competition for post-college employment due to the University's burden-some breadth requirements. Classen's job placement rate is substantially lower than placement rates of many top-ranked schools. Classen students would be more attractive to employers if they had more time to tak advanced courses in their speiclaty, rather than being required to spend fifteen percent of their time at Classen taking courses outside their subject area. We demand, therefore, that the University avandon or drastically cut back on its breadth requirements."

The Author's intention to increase post-college employment rates is commendable. However, the author's argument is lacking in the fact that his/her analysis is a bit narrow, focusing simply on the curriculum's breadth requirement while not focusing at all on other factors.

The Author mentions that Classen's Breadth requirement is to be blamed for the lack of employment. The Author mentions fifteen percent. Fifteen Percent of what? How much is fifteen percent? ten days? twenty days? A month? There is an ambiguity about how much pressure students face. It may be possible that fifteen percent is not much in terms of the actual time. And thus does not prove to be an encumberance, implying that specialized courses can still be taken. And if this is true, curriculum cannot be blamed. If the author can provide concrete data about how many credits hours students have to spend on major and non-major courses, only then can a detailed analysis be made.

The Author mentions that students from Classen would be more marketable if they were able to take more specialized courses in their major. However, the author does not provide a holistic scrutiny of the merits of the students itself. It may be possible that students from Classen simply do not have enough out of class, real-life experience. This may arise due to a lack of extra curriculur activities available at Classen, or the inability of the administration to place students in proper internships. Employers may be reluctant to hire graduates who have too much speicalized knowlegde but little to no job or management experience. If the author can prove, or at least show some statistics as to the practical management skills of the Classen Graduates

The Author also mentions that Classen has a lower post-college employment compared to many top-ranked schools. Classen's reputation in comparison to such schools is not mentioned. It may also be possible that top-ranked schools may have a higher post-college employment rate simply because of the reputation of the schools. Since no timeline for the data is given. It may possilbe the Classen had a higher employment rate before, and due to some economic downturn, Employers are inclined to hire less people, and thus predisposed to hire graduates from more prestigious schools.

Unless the author provides a more detailed description of Classen Student portfolios, it cannot be conclusively remarked that the school curriculum needs to be overhauled. And thus the author's recommendation cannot be considered.

Writing Feedback / Installing lights to reduce accidents. GRE Analyze an argument. Feel free to comment. [5]

"More and more cities and towns are installing red light cameras to catch red light runners in the act. In 2008 alone, red light running accounted for 762 fatal crashes in the United States and 137,000 injuries. A study conducted by the Federal Highway Administration attributed a 25 percent reduction in T-bone accidents at intersections to the installation of red light cameras. Because people fail to voluntarily honor the law, these traffic cameras are essential in enforcing these laws and protecting public safety."

Discuss the merits of the preceding argument. Analyze the evidence used as well as the general reasoning. Present points that would strengthen the argument or challenge it.

It is commendable that that authorities are trying to curtail the frequency of accidents and reduce the possibilty of pernicious accidents by the employment of "safety cameras". However, the decision of the authority is based on flawed assumptions and nebulous statistics.

First of all, the author assumes that since the presence of traffic lights at accidents at intersections, they would work equally well with traffic lights and thus will be effective in reducing red-light running. It should be pointed out that just because something works in one case does not mean that it would necessarily work well in another case. If such is the case, and the assumption is not fully warranted of justified, then it is probable that the presence of cameras will have meager effect on the number and frequency of red-light running. If the author can provide a description of how a camera may reduce the number of accidents at intersections, then only may the assumption be properly extraploated into a proper justification.

Another problem with the argument is that the statistics are a bit too vague and broad. For example, it is possible that the density of accidents is not uniform throughtout the US. But rather, it may be possible that the accidents are more concentrated in certain areas than in others. For example, more red light running accidents may occur in california than in Kentucky or Ohio. If this is true, than the employment of cameras in areas where such rankling incidents rarely occur may have little effect. Also, the statisitcs are a bit outdated (The numbers are from the year 2008), and things may have changed overtime. Perhaps the red light running effects are probably not as severe as before. The author can make a more convincing argument by providing more details about the statistics, as well providing numbers over a range of years in order to show that red light running is being worse or stagnant.

Another assumption that the author makes is the fact that the red light running incidents are the fault of the people, in other words, the cause of red light running is not stated explicitly in the passage. It may be entirely possible that inclement weather may make it difficult for people to react to red-lights at intersections on time. If this is true, then the authoritires may require a different approach. Or it may be possible that the fines for red light running are simply too low, hence people may not be too bothered about paying fines, and then sink back into recidivism once payments are done.

Writing Feedback / GRE Analyze an argument. Restoration of local news and weather forecast time [4]

The following is a memorandum from the business manager of a television station.

"Over the past year, our late-night news program has devoted increased time to national news and less time to weather and local news. During this period, most of the complaints received from viewers were concerned with our station's coverage of weather and local news. In addition, local businesses that used to advertise during our late-night news program have canceled their advertising contracts with us. Therefore, in order to attract more viewers to our news programs and to avoid losing any further advertising revenues, we should expand our coverage of weather and local news on all our news programs."

Write a response in which you examine the stated and/or unstated assumptions of the argument. Be sure to explain how the argument depends on these assumptions and what the implications are for the argument if the assumptions prove unwarranted.

The author's recommendation for an increase in the time devoted in the coverage of local and weather news cannot be adopted due to the dearth of details presented in the argument.

First, the author argues that the station has received a number of complaints regarding the coverage of local news and weather forcast. But the author has not mentioned what kind of complaints are being made. It may be possible that the complaints are not eventuated by the reduced time dedicated for such broadcasts, but rather the animadversions may be arising form the quality of news being broadcasted. For example, the stations's weather forecast are not accurate. Or maybe that the station is probably not covering important local news, or maybe the anchors not disinterested, conveying strong opinions, during news time. If this is the case, then simply restoring the local news and weather forecast timings will not solve the problem. The author can strengthen his argument by citing specific complaints in his argument.

Secondly, the author asserts that the reason for businesses rescinding contracts is arising from the reduced broadcast time. Just because two events coincide does not necessarily mean that they are linked to one another. There could be a plethora of other reasons why businesses may recant their commitments. Local businesses may have terminated contracts because they may have been offered better and more lucrative contracts elsewhere. Or it may also be possible that such businesses may be in financial straits, and hence cannot continue to pay for advertising costs. If the author can elicit a reason from business owners which corroborates his point, then can the author make a more congenial case.

Given the lack of specifics, the author has not been able to make a strong case in favor of the restoration of weather and local news to the original level, and therefore his recommendation cannot be considered as it is now.

Writing Feedback / If you could meet a historical figure, who would it be? TOEFL essay [3]

As a person who aspires to be a physicist, I always pined to meet one of the most famous physicists in existence, Richard Feynman. A brilliant physicist, yet one who stands out among others due to his legendary personality and a plethora of various expreinces.

First of all, Feynman has an almost ubiquitous presence in Physics articles. And many famous Physicists have mentioned his named while discussing their own works or providing anecdotes from their own expereinces. In fact, Stanford Physicist Leonard Susskind once mentioned that "Feynman's period was a golden period in physics, everyone wanted to work with him". Given Feynman's status among his peers, I would also like to meet Feynman in person and be able to descry what made him so inspirational and likeable among his peers. Perhaps furing our meet, some of Feynman's inspiration may rub of on me.

Judging from Feynman's biography and what many people say about him, Feynman always seemed to be full of great ideas and had a simple yet elegant way of explaining recondite physics problems. In fact, before Feynman worked on Superfluid helium, other physicists before him, some of the nobel-prize winners, have been able to only produce an incomplete model for the behaviour of superfluid Helium. Feynman took only a pencil and a sheet of paper and wrote the behaviour of helium, and soon was able to extract a complete model for something that has eluded Physicists for so long. During our meet, I'd would want to understand how Feynman thinks about physics problems, what goes on in his head when he considers so many parameters, how the proverbial light bulb starts to shine in his mind, so that I may be able to reproduce his way of thinking one day.

Another thing Feynman had was eclectic interests, and a wide range of experiences. Being passionate about drums, Feynman once took a year off to travel to Brazil and play the bongos properly. Feynman was one of the youngest members of the manhattan project and would cantankerously annoy the security guards. Upon our meet, I would like to enquire about his medley of experiences and what he thinks of them in retrospect. Being a person of ecelctic interests myself, I would like to know how Feynman balances everything is his Life.

Feynman is everything I aspire to be. I beleive that in order to even measure up to him, I must learn a great many things from him. And hence, Richard Feynman is my person of choice

Writing Feedback / Benefits of Micro-lending. GRE Analyze an argument, Feel free to comment [4]

The following is a common argument used to support increased globalization - expansion of economies beyond national borders.

"Microlending is the key to ending poverty. With microlending, investors make small loans to entrepreneurs in developing countries, so they can start a business and become self-sufficient. In return, the investor has the opportunity to profit from the interest. This helps the impoverished lift themselves out of poverty in a dignified way, instead of having to feel like beggars. To be successful, people need opportunities and the resources to pursue those opportunities. They want to work and are looking for a hand up, not a hand out. Microlending is the answer."

Write a response in which you examine the unstated assumptions of the previous argument. Be sure to explain how the argument depends on the assumptions and what the implications are if the assumptions prove unwarranted.

The author does make a somewhat cogent argument about the benefits of microlending. However, the author's conclusion is based on a number of flawed assumption and a lack of evidence concerning the success, or possible success of microlending.

First of all, the author assumes that everyone who takes micro-loans will be able to start up and run a successful business. The success in return will yield enough profits for entrepreneurs to pay back the loans. The author does not put forward any discussion or elaboration which guarantees the success of start ups. Or it may also be possible that a lot of developing countries may not have a conducive environemnt for start ups. If someone takes a micro-loan, causes and entrepreneurial fiasco and is unable to pay back loans, then neither the entrepreneur nor the investor will end up winning, and people may not rise out of indignation. The author can strengthen his argument by putting an elaboration which would maximise succuess, plus a few accounts which evince this assumption.

Secondly, the author assumes that there will be a lot of people who would take micro-loans, and initiate their own businesses. This would lead to more-loans, and more profits from interest. It may be possible that there may not be a lot of entrepreneurs, and in turn the number of loans taken may be few, which would yield less returns. If there is a dearth of entrepreneurs, then the authors plan for a successful mirco-lending system may not work. If the author can put forward evidence which indicates that there may be a lot of people looking forwards to start their own businesses, he/she may be able to strengthen the argument more.

And finally, since interest and profits are involved, there may be a discrepancy regarding interest rates. For example, investors may opt for higher interest rates, which would ostensibly yield higher profits. However, if interest rates are a bit too high, budding entrepreneurs may be reluctant to borrow money, and thus the author's idea may not work. If the author can provide a suitable range of interest rates that may work both in favor of investors and borrowers, the author's argument for micro-lending may be strengthened.

The author's argument suffers from a paucity of evidence and the holes in the argument. Microlending may be a good idea to pursue if the author is capable of filling the holes left behind, backed up with corroborating accounts

Writing Feedback / TV Vs. Literature. GRE Analyze an Issue [2]

"Television and videos are going to leave a more lasting and valid perception of our society to future generations than is literature."

Discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the previous
statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In
developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which
the statement may or may not hold true and explain how those considerations
shape your position.

Throughout history, humankind has written and recorded in various ways what
happened throughout time. However, as time passed on, our perception of what
was recorded changes due to many reasons. Some media are, however, more
capable of creating a solid perception than others.

It cannot be denied that TV and Videos, as well as written literature, both
have shaped our perceptions of what the past was, and what the present is.
Events and the way of life centuries ago have been recapitualted by great
writers and thinkers and immortalized in ink and paper, at a time when
television and digital media did not exist. Without literature, it would
have been very difficult to understand how life was during the times when
there was no electricity and none of the modern technology we beg. Without
literature, it may be difficult for the lay man to understand why social
traditions were the way they had been enacted in the past.

However, despite the fact that literature gives us an account of what the
past was like enables us to perceive past societies, the diurnal activities,
the superstitions, the practices etc. , Literautre can give us a jaundiced
perception of what the past was like. Whenever we read written accounts, our
exegesis of the account differs from person to person, because it is very
rare that two human beings think exactly alike. As such, how we perceive the
society of the past is very subjective. Given the caprice of human
imagination, that perceived image may vary from time to time, and thus
cannot be described as long lasting. And therefore, literauture may fail to
provide us with a lasting and valid perception of society. By extending this
argument into the future, it may very well be possible that whatever written
account writers and thinkers provide of the present society may be
interpreted in different ways by people in the future.

Television and video, on the other hand, are capable of displaying what
exactly what happens. As such, unlike writing, one does not require
imagination to understand and perceive what television and video describe
through a series of images. The risk of distortion is minimized because
videos and physical images, unlike our minds, are not capricious, but remain
constant. And hence can remain as a more valid account of what it recorded,
and therefore give us a truer account of the present in the future. Since
an intact and uadultereated description can be given by television and
videos, it can supersede literature in terms of creating a lasting and more
valid perception of the future.

Both literature and digital media have critical roles in the preservation of
annals of history. However, since literature requires us to excercise our
minds in order to glean clarity from written words and letters, our
perception changes. Whereas digital media practically displays what it
records, and our minds do not require straining, thus creating a more
lasting and vlide perception

Graduate / My reason for wanting to pursue graduate physics in graduate school is simple; SOP [6]

Please give your reasons for wishing to do graduate work in physics. Prepare your statement of objectives and goals in whatever form clearly presents your views. Include, as far as you can, your particular interests, be they experimental or theoretical, and show how your background supports these interests. Tell us about your research or other relevant experience outside the classroom. The Admissions Committee will welcome any factors you wish to bring to its attention concerning your academic and work experience to date.

My reason for wanting to pursue graduate physics in graduate school is simple: to understand and work with elementary particles. The idea of understanding the behaviour of particles with the human mind has been a fascinating prospect for me for quite a while.

My background in physics may raise a few eyebrows. Simply because it is highly unusual. I am an engineering major and never took a college level physics course (Except maybe courses on electromagnetism). My knowledge in physics solely comes from teaching myself using various media.

I learned a myriad of things in engineering school: Real-Time systems, Control Engineering, Signal Processing, Power Electronic Design, etc. Yet, such topics never appealed to me as much as my studies did in high school. As I finished my first semester of my second year, I browsed the library and picked up books on various topics, stumbling upon Serway, Moses and Meyer's "Modern Physics"

My interest on physics was in a "Full swing" after a few days. Before long, I finished learning a semester's worth of relativity and quantum mechanics. Summer gave me ample time and opportunity to explore different avenues in physics: Classical Mechanics, Statistical Physics, as well as different avenues of modern physics. Besides physics, I have taught myself certain branches of mathematics such as Group Theory and topology. My studies would often be carried late into the nights, which I enjoyed. The sheer effort put into covering a broad spectrum of material has enabled me to appear for the GRE Physics test.

I tried my hand at Physics research during the summer at a separate university. One professor was kind enough to introduce me to a doctoral student of his. Through him, I was able to carry out some small research into Supersymmetry. Although I had conversations discussions regarding other fields of the so called "New-Physics" such as string theory and grand unified theory. Moreover, this phase was particularly important to me as it was an opportunity to explore the world of particle physics, something I had an interest in for a while. This, combined with my late nights, has consolidated the fact that I can quickly adapt to the heavy course load and new, yet difficult material I will encounter in graduate school.

<A paragraph about the faculty>
Other than academia, I have participated in a number of extra-curricular activities. I have been the IT officer and the secretary of The Bangladesh Society at my university. Furthermore, I have been to different countries before and have met people from diverse backgrounds. These experiences are important for two reasons. Number one, it has significantly improved my communication skills; Number two, it has built up my adaptability to change.

All in all, despite the anomaly, I believe that through sheer willpower and tenacity, I can acclimate well to graduate school and hopefully prove to be a valuable asset and a student. After completing graduate studies, I hope to continue to work in theoretical physics, be it in huge labs or small groups while shouldering any additional responsibility and hardship; continuing to explore the quantum world using my mind.