Writing Feedback / People should scrutinize the ideas and actions of people in positions of authority - Napoleon story [2]

Please correct my grammar errors, and tell me if I have strong reasons and specify examples. Thank you.

Is it important to question the ideas and the decisions of people in position of authority?

There are many people who entirely believe and trust the ideas of authorities because most of them have received a good education and most are elites of the country, company or group. However, it is important to question them if we consider some of their ideas or actions impotent as they are also humans and are prone to mistakes. Also, being in a position of authority doesn't mean that he or she is the only member of the country or group.

People trust in dignitaries mainly because they think that dignitaries are the most intelligent in a country or group and will do their best. That said, upper classmen are also humans; they are not perfect, and so can make mistakes. A first example to draw upon is historical. When Napoleon Bonaparte wanted to conquer Europe, and was so close to success. He decided to attack Russia in winter, but it was a very bad idea since it was difficult for the soldiers to assimilate such cold and snow. However, nobody grilled Napoleon about his plan because he was in position of authority. This decision of not questioning Napoleon had a great impact on his militia. They lose the battle and many soldiers died from the cold.

Abraham Lincoln once said, "A government of the people, by the people, for the people, shall not perish from the Earth." This quote emphasized the importance of questioning the authority. The people with political power are chosen by the folk, but the government is of everyone. Therefore, everyone has the right to doubt the authority because we are all part of the government. If people do not question those in authority, power figures will do what they want and not what the majority wants.

In conclusion, we can see via the history of Napoleon and many others that people should scrutinize the ideas and actions of people in positions of authority. In this way, we can prevent future conflicts and failures.

Writing Feedback / Better to be underrated by people or to be overrated by them? [4]

Hi, this is a SAT essay prompt:
It is better to be underrated by people than to be overrated by them.
Do you agree or disagree with the statement above?

Can you tell me if I have STRONG reasons and examples, and correct my grammar mistakes. Thank you

All of us have been underrated and overrated by others sometimes. Being overrated makes we feel uncomfortable and nervous, but it is better than being underrated for two reasons. First, we can have more opportunities such as having a good job, or be chosen to participate in a tournament. Second, it makes us reflect and ameliorate our situation.

Frequently, people lost their jobs' opportunities or the chance of being accepted to a university because the evaluators underestimate them, and do not know their real potential. However, if the evaluators consider us with good characteristics that we actually do not have, we can access to more opportunities.

Now, you may wonder what happens if over time people start to know the real us. Here comes the second advantage of being overrated. If people associate us with qualities that we lack, it means that there is a huge possibility that we actually can achieve it. Therefore, with this thought, we will be looking forward to gain the qualities that people overrated. For instance, I have a friend who was viewed as a diligent student by her teachers. Nevertheless, the reality is that she is not so industry. This attribution makes her think about her personality. Afterwards, she became a diligent student just as her teacher considered.

There is a story about a boy whose mother was called to meet his teacher. The teacher told the mom about the bad grade of her son and doubted about his ability. When the mother came home, the boy asked her mom what did the teacher said. His mother replied: "The teacher said you're an intelligent student and do very well in class." Since then, the boy has been working very hard to achieve good grades.

After a careful analysis about the real life experience and the story, indeed being overrated has advantages such as having more chances to perform and to improve. We should not be underrated by others.

Undergraduate / "Reason over emotion"; Programme preference - City University, why? [8]

Explain why you wish to study the programme and how the qualification is relevant to your career aspirations, as well as your expectation of the programme. (no more than 300 words)

Tell me how to improve it, correct grammar errors. Any feedback is needed.

"Reason over emotion" These three simple words explain why I want to study a major related to Sciences, especially Chemistry. I am the type of person that prefers numbers, data and graphics than poems and other abstract things. This aspect makes me embrace the Science. This subject is closely related to our lives, from molecules to metabolism to gravity.

By envolving in Chemistry Olympiad, biology field trips, and others activities, I developed some characters relevant to my future career. These include a careful personality and a perseverant character. For example, assisting in laboratory lessons I became more careful, and by participating in Tournament I fortified my perseverance. Also, by taking part in Field trips I develop

Now, I look forward to enter to the College o Science and Engineering, and later study Applied Chemistry. I hope that the programme can help me to acquire my knowledge and skills that will broaden my experiences and perspectives. Also, I expect to use my knowledge to benefit other people. This is extremely important since I wouldn't be able to do my best in the community services without the help of the little knowledge that I have. For instance, one of the services was to tutor students from a poor community. Without the things that I have learned in school, I wouldn't be able to help those students. Therefore, I really want to use my knowledge that I will acquire in the future for the benefits of others, and be able to contribute to the society.

thanks in advance

Writing Feedback / SAT essay - TELEVISION [5]

Assignment: What are your thoughts on the idea that television has turned out to isolate people instead of bringing them together?

I'm not a native English speaker, and I don't have good writing skills, so tell me if I have good reasons and examples, what aspects should I improve, and grammar errors.

Thanks in advance

While ostensibly the television has turned out to isolate people, actually it depends on how the uses manage it. Everything has its advantages and disadvantages. Therefore, to have a positive, the owner should use it wisely.

Most of the objects are created to have a useful usage, but sometimes we are the ones who create negative consequence. Many people think that now the television has made people to enclose themselves in the house and stop having contacts with friends and family. In my case, my parents are always busy. However, there is a time when all the family comes together and it is television time. Therefore, the television doesn't isolate my family, but make us come together.

I have a friend who doesn't talk to anyone when she is watching television, and she tends to watch it alone. Nevertheless, she doesn't watch television for a long time, so she also spends a lot of time with her friends and family.

Some people think that when the neighbourhood only had few television sets, people tend to have closer relationships. If we think in the same way, should we have few fridges in the community, so we can spend more time with our neighbour?

In conclusion, determining if the television has turned out to isolate people or not, it depends on how the owner use it. The television set is a tool for us. Therefore, we should use it wisely in order to have positive influences such as bring the family or the neighbourhood together.

Undergraduate / What is your favorite word and why? - Honesty [6]

What is your favorite word and why? Answer the question in a half page or roughly 250 words

Any feedback, critics and correction will be needed. Thank you

Disappointed face, vexed expressions. These are reactions of people who just discovered that someone had lie to them. Since I was little, my family has always taught me to be an honest person, a person with values. Still, there were some times that I lied because I was afraid that my family would reprimand me, but my family always ended angrier due to my dishonesty. When I became more matured I set a goal: become a completely honest person. While ostensibly it sounds impossible, actually it is viable. This is not only viable, but necessary. Nowadays, honesty is one of the many values that we have lost. There are deceivers and counterfeit object everywhere. Just as Noel Coward said: "It is discouraging how many people are shocked by honesty and how few by deceit" This is really sad because you can't trust anyone. You don't know if you are facing with a liar or an honest person. Honesty is crucial in this world. With this value, we can avoid a lot of conflict. Moreover, we can overcome obstacles. The time has come, we should rescue the values that we have left behind and hence build a better world.

Did you already know my favorite word?
Yes, you're right! My favorite word is honesty.