Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK 2 Writing - Compulsory military service for unemployed youth [3]

The youth in many countries are unemployed and unskilled, where at the same time, the military services are in need of people. Compulsory military service is beneficial and necessary.

To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
Give reasons for your answer, and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

military activity for youngsters

The issue of whether the teenagers must join the essential army service or not is certainly a controversial topic. Despite some people argued that it is pros outweighed cons.I personally disagree with that. The following examples will illustrate my point of views.

Firstly, based on the economic value,army facilities can be replaced human beings not only for the duration of function but also the expanse. In one word, it can fulfill the demands of people. For example, government can purchase the high-tech tank or automatic weapon which is controlled by machine and they can be operated properly more than a real human being. In addition, a well-trained army takes around 3 to 5 years to finish their training while the automatic weapon can be operated right after we purchased it. Moreover, citizens need to pay for a well-trained army salary until he passes away. In my opinion,I would like to pay tax for long-term used facilities rather than an army.

Secondly, I generally believe that teenagers should attend schools to acquire knowledge instead of join military. As like the topic mentioned about, most of the children in the world are without occupations and talents for employment and join military cannot provide them a well education to gain more practical skills to find a proper job. For instance, a study showed that a teenager who joined military did not acquire any general knowledge while the others who went to school obtained a numerous skill from educational center and they found a proper job afterward. It goes without saying that joining the compulsory military service for children is not beneficial for them, instead, it is a somewhat negative.

In summary, I once again reaffirm my position that I disagree necessary military activity is positive and essential for teenagers. On the contrary, I believe that it is not an appropriate way to do so based on economic value and the importance of education for youth.

Writing Feedback / The unemployment level in Australia 2012 (IELTS Writing Task 1) [3]

Australian citizens without any occupation

The line graph illustrates the percentage of citizens without occupations in city districts and countryside territories from the beginning of 2012 to the last of 2012 in Australia.

Overall, the ratio of unemployment in countryside showed downward in the first two quarters while the other portion of city area was displayed upward. However, it is exceedingly apparent that both proportions which displayed the citizens without job decreased dramatically at the beginning of third quarter.

After the downward trend, both lines went to the steady upward trend for a period of time. Nevertheless,when the percentages of rural sections reached around 5.5%, it suddenly turned into fluctuated situation which can be apparently seem the line ups and downs until the last month of 2012. On the contrary, the city districts depicted the third-increased trend from around 3.9% to 4.9% in the last quarter of 2012.

Moreover, the percentages between both areas in last quarter are the closest compared to another period of quarters.

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Writing Feedback / The issue of whether government should invest on railway systems more than roads or not [3]

The writing of IELTS Cambridge 11 Task 2

Government should spend money on railways rather than roads. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

The issue of whether government should invest on railway systems more than roads or not is controversial in society. It is argued by some people that putting efforts on railways is a brilliant way compare to constructing roads. However, I personally disagree that constructing more railway systems are much more beneficial than roads. The following essay will illustrate the two chief reasons of my opinion.

First of all, creating a mass railway system need to accumulate abundant of money and time. Unlike the money which invests on roads, governments have to gather funds from private companies or increase tax from citizens in order to create a new railway. It might cause the financial heaviness of society. In addition, roads can be built within a short-term period, and we can start to use it in handy. On the contrary, from planning to completing the whole train system, it takes at least more than ten years. Nowadays, world and society are changeable, we never know what is going to happen in the next second, not to mention if we can really use railway facilities in that far future. This is my first reason why I disagree the statement which mentioned on the topic.

Secondly, it is not so efficient for train to reach all the villages or rural districts. It is said that all roads lead to Rome and it is a true fact compare to the limitation of railway expansion. Most of the time, railway only can reach main cities. The citizens who live in country would prefer to chose roads. Based on the efficiency and convenience factors, I strongly deny the statement that held on the topic.

In summary, I once again reaffirm my position that governments spend money on railways rather than roads is inappropriate and I completely disagree with that due to the massive money and time investing. Last but least, its own efficiency.

Writing Feedback / The pie charts illustrate the water usage for six different regions around the world [3]

The writing of IELTS Cambridge 11 Test1 Task 1

The pie charts illustrate the water usage for six different regions around the world. It is crystal clear to see that argriculture water using purpose occupied the greatest amount in Central Asia, and it is also the most biggest percentage among the three water categories. Next followed by industrial water usage,which contains about 53% in Europe. Compared to the others, the motive of taking domestic water is relatively less,only South America has 19% and demands more domestic water usage than the other five territories.

As we can see that although Central Asia consumed the most ratio of agriculture water purpose, its industrial one is the last. Taking a close look, we can easily to find out that its domestic one is in the last position as well, just 7%, same as South East Asia.

Then it is quite straightforward to know that Europe and north America are industrialized cause they need a lot of water for industrial purpose. On the other hand, the other four regions are non-industralized due to the extremely less portion of industrial water using purpose compared to the former one.

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