Writing Feedback / TASK 2- Both sides and opinion - Teenagers should concetrate on the whole school materials [2]

QUESTION:
Some people believe that teenagers should concetrate on all school subjects. But others believe that teenagers should focus on the subject that they are good at or that they find the most interest.

Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

ANSWER:

Primary and secondary pupils are suggested to master on the whole school materials as to have broadened point of view, while some argue that focused learning at the most favourite subjects is more valued for the youngsters since they will enjoy the process. I opine that both sides will give valuable insights with the appropriate arrangement.

Having the responsibility to understand abundant school lessons will probably enrich the student's knowledge. However, it leads into under pressure atmosphere and is more likely to make the student do other activities during ongoing class to cope with stress. Taking an example, South Korean Senior High School students are forced to study for more than 12 hours per day, and it continues day by day. Thus, chatting with their friends during class become more popular in recent years.

Interactive classes with one focused subject are more probably motivated the student to develop their ability since they are feeling happy. The comfortable ambience offered will raise student's creativities to create such innovation, which have a valuable function. For instance, since the 2013 curriculum had established in Indonesia, students were given the freedom to prioritize a school subject. This new approach is proven for increasing the student's invention in the last seven years.

In my opinion, the curriculum should be given in the general approach to give the student a clear study foundation. Then, they allow to choose their favourite subject to be an expert to develop meaningful results in their subject.

In conclusion, encouraging students to conquer all school subjects will benefit for the student's knowledge to tackle the future challenges, while a tailored one will bring the pupils to be a star in their preferred subject. The education ministry should consider the youngster's potential when planning a curriculum study.

Writing Feedback / TASK 1-CHART- household expenditure in New Zealand and UK [4]

WASTE disposal

A comparison of household expenditure in New Zealand and UK between 1980 and 2008 is presented in the chart.
Overall, food and drink expenditure percentage showed a decline over 28 years period, while utility expenditure was the reverse. Also, UK residents tend to spend their budgets more on leisure than New Zealander.

Initially, larger proportion for households spending in New Zealand was on food and drink with 29%, and the parallel figure for UK was 23%. By 2008, a slightly decreased in food and drink budget in New Zealand and UK, with 4 % respectively. By contrast, both countries utility budget showed an increased from 27% to 31% in New Zealand and from 26% to 28% in the UK.

Money spent for picnic was the highest demand in UK, both 1980 and 2008. In contrast, it became third in New Zealand. In fact, there was a half in proportion differences between those who like to spend their money on vacation in both countries. Eventually, transport cost and other cost had roughly 10% and 15% bills respectively.

(176 words)

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Writing Feedback / BOTH VIEW & OPINION - TV is a good educational tool for children. [3]

TV program for children

Television becomes preferable enlightentment media for childhood, while some people argue that youngsters choose television for amusement. In my opinion, I believe that TV offered valuable educational feature for the childen that increase understanding and entertain the youngster as to releasing stress.

Choosing TV as educational media for children could be the realistic reason since it has attractive feature. Screen-based learning including educational TV channel makes simplicity to combine several kind of learning media in one complete package. As the children have different learning method, these creative stuffs can encourage them to have depth understanding according to their ability. Taking example, TVRI in Indonesia offers special channel to support everyday distance-learning which deliver the study material using any kind of sophisticated media without reducing teacher explanation in the begining.

A teenager group prefer such entertaining program which can bring happiness in their daily life. After long-day working, they likely choose informal shows rather than formal ones which can help purifying their mind and body from complicated job by doing some refreshing activities like watching television. Based on data from informatic and technology ministry of Republic Indonesia, shop opera and games lead the race for amusing people age 15-40 years old, while people whose age is over 40 tend to watch informative program.

In my point of view, wide range of TV channel variey give a freedom for the audience to actively choose their favourite. Adults is suggested to be more selective in particular age-restricted content when they nurture their children. This will be wise, if adult set the educational section during daytime and shift in to entertainment content during nightime.

To sum up, educational section in TV program can brings advantages for children as it helps education process and it can be enjoyable for the youngster's routine. Furthermore, TV can provides benefit if the people select the program wisely.

(309 WORDS)

Writing Feedback / Massive growth of international tourism directly affected to the wide knowledge of English language [3]

The development of tourism contributed to english becoming the most prominent languange in the world.

Some people think this will lead to English becoming the only languange spoken globally. What are the advantages to having one languange in the world?

Massive growth of international tourism directly affected to the widely spoken langanguge in the world, English, that promoted as only language used worldwide. However, having one form of language to communicate brings a merit, as it could be the connecting dot between two distinct culture, while it might drives some drawback that lead into local language rarity.

English as the prominent languge to be internationally spoken help in incresing understanding among contries. The people might have terminology sameness when they conducting such a bussines which can deteriorate miscommunication. What is the implication? It is clearly seen that the profitable relationship will be established between those countries. For instance, Japan is a renowned country which preserve the Japanese languange in daily basis for their citizen since they were a kids, yet English will be introduced and being encouraged when the people admitting higher education as to maximalize the economic chances in another country and share valuable research's result.

On the other hand, promoting English as the one-fit-all languange might lurking a danger for the native spoken language and erase the culture as well. The most common reason for the foreign tourist visiting rich culture site is they intend to learn the diversity especially the language and culture. Therefore, if those dissapering time to time, it will lead into marked less interest to spend leisure time to this place which influence the local's economy as well. For instance, Bali is a well known region in Indonesia which always practicing Ngaben as the funeral ritual and ceremony before the people's ashes will be scattered in the ocean. It attracts the foreign tourist to photograph this unusual occassion.

In conclusion, while there will be abundant of advantages offered, it also possible problems served if English become one global language. Thus, the society should be aware to practice their own language everday, while the tend to be a bilingual as to ensure the culture exsistance in long run.