Undergraduate / CMC leadership essay -- Jumong [6]

I know this essay needs to be ripped up. I had writers block on this essay for like a week. Please help me! Will critique yours.

Leadership is a constant theme and emphasis at CMC. In fact, one of the ways we describe CMC students is "Leaders in the Making." Identify and discuss a person, fictional or nonfictional, who has helped shape culture and thought. You may select someone from any field: literature, the arts, science, politics, history, athletics, business, education, etc.

War history left a bitter taste in my mouth. Memorizing thousands-no, millions-of dates or names for each battle and learning about one country conquering the next was my idea of wasted brain space. But the one thing that made war history somewhat appealing was the individual story of each general, captain, colonel, or lieutenant who led their men into battle. Their capabilities, their accomplishments and, particularly, their victories and failures all reveal the morals and values that they have. However, the relationship between a leader and his followers truly defines the greatness of their leadership. Followers would look upon a great leader with respect, trust, obedience, and devotion.

He was a victorious leader from South Korean war history. I did not learn about him at school or from my parents, a documentary, or a biography. I learned about him through an 81- episode drama. Of course, this means that the facts I do know of him are not facts; they have probably been embellished for the media. He is the fictional version of the historical figure. He is the one on my television screen on channel 18.3. He is the man for whom the drama is named: Jumong.

Born as the son of a king's concubine, Jumong grew up in a rivalry for the crown between his two older step brothers. Although he had never coveted for the throne, his brothers label him as a threat and try to murder him. Naturally, his brothers fall into corruption while Jumong fights to save his people from their enemy, the Han nation. He succeeds in freeing his oppressed people and finally ends up establishing his own kingdom of Goguryeo.

In each battle they fought together and every stubborn obstacle they demolished, special relationships formed between Jumong and his men. His men revered him with an emotion stronger than love and bestowed upon him their complete devotion. In return, Jumong did not overlook this devotion like other war leaders would. Instead, he never sacrificed even one of his men needlessly, working with them to protect the innocent people.

Jumong discovered each man's potential, and entrusted him with a task. Every task was essential to help Jumong realize his greater goal of establishing a nation that lasted for hundreds of years in Korean history. He changed his soldiers' lives individually by cultivating their talents into necessary skills, influencing several soldiers to become leaders themselves-he transformed three common criminals into generals of war. He valued their lives and talents. Claremont McKenna College is a breeding ground for leaders like Jumong, people who want to take control of their destiny and improve the lives of others. It is a place that can see the potential in people and nurture them to become successful leaders of their own.

Undergraduate / CORNELL! environmental science [6]

Please help. As all of you probably know, Cornell's supplement is due on January 2nd. Constructive criticism is WELCOME.

Topic:

College of Agriculture and Life Sciences:
How have your interests and related experiences influenced your selection of major?

Someone carelessly throws his or her crumpled sack lunch in the general direction of the garbage can. It falls short of the edge and lifelessly bounces to the floor. It disappears unnoticed among an empty Hot Cheetos bag, a dirty napkin, and debris that had collected there. It all compiles into waste. Waste that is placed outside in bags, two or three a house, for the garbage collectors to "get rid of." Waste that is dumped into landfills where it just sits. It is neither being mysteriously vanquished into thin air nor being turned into recycled goods. And trash is not the only matter of waste out there. We waste. We waste food, we waste electricity, we waste water; we waste away our natural environment. "We" are Americans.

I am American. After learning that Americans have won the flattering title of "one of the biggest gross polluters in the world," I tried to find excuses to justify my home country's shortcomings. But the only reason behind our lack of environmentalism is-although I hate to admit it-a combination of ignorance and selfishness. We are ignorant towards the consequences of our detrimental actions, and selfishly snatch depleted resources from Mother Earth. We want a comfortable life; we are spoiled.

On discovering this appalling fact about the country that I fervently love, I knew that I could propose a solution to the problem. Not the age-old problem of global warming, of course not, but rather the problem of ignorance. What is the opposite of ignorance? Awareness. Once Americans are aware, we can never turn a blind eye saying, "I did not know." Through awareness, we can recognize our own selfishness. Yet, before I can instruct a multitude of people as to how to cease the environment's journey to destruction, I knew that knowledge on the subject was a necessity. Majoring in the Science of Natural and Environmental Systems is the perfect way for me to acquire the knowledge that will pave the way for my future.

It is obvious that this is my calling when I hear nature's cries for help reverberate around me. Apartments roar triumphantly as they shoot up like overgrown weeds on the pavement. Life languishes beneath layers of concrete as it struggles to emerge. Helpless trees silently scream as they try to shy away from the insatiable chainsaw. Streams gurgle with a thick mixture of feces and urine. But among all these sounds, my voice can be heard, spreading awareness. I want to be the catalyst that will ignite a country-wide environmental movement and, someday, in the world.