Writing Feedback / IELTS WT2: TV HAS NO VALUE ON CHILDREN. AGREE? DISAGREE? [4]

Hi I have an IELTS exam coming this Saturday, any suggestions for improvement will be appreciated.
Many people believe that television programs are of no value for children. Do you agree? Why or why not? Provide reasons and examples to support your response.

It is no doubt that watching television has a huge effect on people of all ages especially for children. Although some of these presents less or no value for the young viewers, I believe that there are TV shows that intends to present educational values for children on their programs.

Many TV network companies are telecasting basic mathematical and alphabetical equations programs everyday. Take "ABC For Kids" on channel 10 in Australia for example, they are targeting young audiences of the society to watch and learn from these shows and hoping that they can use this knowledge when in class. Also, children can learn to sing and dance by seeing entertainment programs on TV. These are some ways of showing that there are significant values gained from watching the television.

In addition, many parents predisposed their children to watch television shows that oversee the value of life, family and friends. These parents use television to bond with their children as well and take this opportunity to watch and at the same time answer the questions of the young innocent minds with regards to love, care and respect for instance. Some programs also show how kissing and hugging a crying person supports them in the time of need for example, proves that by watching television this can be imitated by children.

Given that there are some TV programs that are of less value for the youngsters because it contains violence, for example, there has been an undeniable existence of valuable TV programs to watch. It is recommended that parental guidance must take place all the time.

Writing Feedback / IELTS WT2: Library vs. Computer Technology [7]

Public Libraries should not be maintained any more since we already have computer technology. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give your opinion.

Advancement in technology has rapidly peaking towards success for the last 100 years. It has made a huge decline in the use of library with the existence of computers. Others argue that there is no means of maintaining them at all. My view is that, statistically, at present, libraries are continuously operating due to various reasons and will be analysed in this essay.

Evidently, in many countries, the number of public libraries are still high. Some of them levelled up their quality of service to the locals to be kept worthy. The library in our council Canterbury, for example, opened-up a computer based catalogue and reservation system for the public. In addition, the provided a separate room for computer & internet use wherein students and other people can do their research inside the vicinity of what used to be book & paper building. As these attempts of improvement show, facilitators of libraries have found their way to work with technology to enhance their value.

Additionally, computer technology has been proven to result in physical damage to the human body. For instance, prolonged use of computers may harm our vision through radiation. In contrast, the use of books made from papers will likely cause less damage to the reader's eye sight. Moreover, some libraries do provide bean bags and comfortable lounge chairs for the readers. It helps to maintain body posture properly than sitting in a computer chair for a long time. It is therefore preferred by many to read on books inside the library to keep a healthy eye condition, and utilize comfy chairs to prevent back problems.

It is felt that, although computer technology and the use of internet provide benefits to people, it cannot totally eliminate the use of library for the said reasons. Personally, I will recommend that both can work hand-in-hand with each other to still be able to serve the public's learning process in the old fashioned way plus using the advance equipments such as computers.

Writing Feedback / IELTS WT2: Preservations of Museums and artworks [2]

Museums and artworks are important for the country, for the history, and culture from international down to the local arena. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement and give your opinion.

Preservation of history is very vital in determining the present identity of a certain country. Reliving the past through museums and artwork displays bring people back to where it all started. It is agreed that both are very valuable for the country, for history and culture, whether its is from international or local aspects. The proof of how a country lives the way it is now and how people from the past helps to shape a nation as it is seen when you visit a Museum will serve as evidences of this argument.

Firstly, the root if how a country developed into a certain way of governing its people will be witnessed from having a tour at a Museum. Take Philippines as a democratic country for example, by visiting our national Museum, people will see how we ended up as a free country only by looking at photographs and videos found inside this place. Without the existence of Museums in the future, people can only rely on textbooks to witness a country's history which will be unfortunate for many.

Secondly, apart from figures and documentary paintings in the museum, sculptures of people and their name encrypted on the wall of Museums help people recognize their national heroes. For instance, Jose Rizal, a Philippine national hero, was well known for his real life act of bravery can be seen in a sculpture where he made a face to face contact with his shooter in the midst of killing him. This special artwork is presented to make people recognize the value of what he had done for the independence status of the country. It is then clear that a certain piece of artwork possess a great historical value.

Historical preservations are vital for it serves as a trade name for one's nation, which are established in Museums and artworks, which in the end, will benefit the future generation. I tend to recommend that the highly maintenance of this facility should be supported by many.

Writing Feedback / IELTS WT2: Position of women in Society and their career status [10]

The position of women in society has changed markedly in the last twenty years. Many of
the problems young people now experience, such as juvenile delinquency, arise from the
fact that many married women now work and are not at home to care for their children.
To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Women of the modern day society are engaged to work to make a living just like men. By doing this, some argue that less amount of time is spent looking after their children, which in turn results in problems like juvenile delinquency in young adults.It will be argued that ideal parenting has nothing to do with whether the mother is working or not.

It is proven that the length of time spent by a mother caring for her children is important. But then, how she shows her care for the youngsters is what really matters. For example, a mother maybe spending the whole day with her children but leaving them watching TV or doing unproductive activities all day, does not help the children at all. A mother can care for her children even distance is a hindrance.

In addition, there are various reasons why young adults, particularly teen-aged ones, engaged or involved in early adulthood problems. The people around them, like their friends, for instance, can greatly influence them on doing unpleasant activities with or without their mothers around them.

Apart from this, women have helped contribute financially for their family. This money can be of use in sending their children to school. It is a fact that when children are in school they learn to be moral individuals who practices good conducts, than spending their time playing on the streets.

After analysing that throughout the years, even if women has changed from being a plain house-wife to a socially accepted employees, little effects can be seen on up-bringing their children. It is strongly agreed that, problems young adults experience nowadays have little relation to women's career status.

Any comments/suggestions will be greatly appreciated. Thank you.