Boa503
Jan 6, 2015
Undergraduate / Georgia Tech's motto is: "Progress and Service." What does that mean to you? [4]
What about now? I am not a native English speaker, so can you point out where else I made a grammatical mistake?
Without service, progress is meaningless: whether we are searching for a new drug to treat a disease or improving technology to bring more satisfaction, we are always in the mind of making this world a better and happier place. While helping at my parents' restaurant and volunteering at local organization that fights against hunger, I progress greatly by learning new skills, discovering new layers of myself, and recognizing my potential and influence on others. It is serving others that evokes a sense of gratitude and appreciation within me and gives me a better understanding of our people, our society, and our world as I embrace everyone with open heart and human warmth. No matter whom I work with, I always find that they have new ways of thinking that can broaden my horizons. Therefore, I believe that service is the motivation of our willingness to progress and to succeed.
What about now? I am not a native English speaker, so can you point out where else I made a grammatical mistake?
Without service, progress is meaningless: whether we are searching for a new drug to treat a disease or improving technology to bring more satisfaction, we are always in the mind of making this world a better and happier place. While helping at my parents' restaurant and volunteering at local organization that fights against hunger, I progress greatly by learning new skills, discovering new layers of myself, and recognizing my potential and influence on others. It is serving others that evokes a sense of gratitude and appreciation within me and gives me a better understanding of our people, our society, and our world as I embrace everyone with open heart and human warmth. No matter whom I work with, I always find that they have new ways of thinking that can broaden my horizons. Therefore, I believe that service is the motivation of our willingness to progress and to succeed.