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Posts by ezgifilik [Suspended]
Name: Ezgi Filik
Joined: Oct 29, 2016		 Last Post: May 23, 2017
Threads: 4
Posts: 14  
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From: Turkey

Displayed posts: 18
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ezgifilik   
May 23, 2017
Writing Feedback / Education in home country vs study overseas [3]

Hello,

I believe you catched the main points about studying abroad. I would suggest you to mention about the opportunities that the students can benefit in these days and didn't have before, in parallel with the question.

You can also include some solutions to the things that you showed as disadvantages. For example, for economic problems of families, now we have more opportunities to get scholarships, which turns this disadvantage into another chance to study abroad and confutes your opinion. This change would make your essay more detailed and elaborative. I like the essay the way it is, though. These are just my opinions.

Best,
Ezgi
ezgifilik   
May 23, 2017
Writing Feedback / It is high time to encourage different sources of energy all over the world [3]

Hello Sfiza,

It's a very interesting and popular topic. You may want to read some articles about this topic before revising your essay.

In the first paragraph, you have well summarized the reasons of your opinion. However, you have missed one point in the body of your essay - how GHG emission rates are increasing due to the usage of fossil fuels. In the third paragraph, you mentioned about the results of global warming, but you should also include the effects of GHG emissions to the global warming. Like this, your third paragraph sounds incomplete and written quickly.

In the last parapraph, you said that usage of fossil fuels is not the only reason, but also GHG emissions. I believe that you should indicate how they are interconnected notions, instead of recognizing them as two different reasons.

I like your closing sentences, you emphasize the severe results of human activities.

Best,
Ezgi
ezgifilik   
May 23, 2017
Writing Feedback / Motivation Letter of Taking M.TESOL program in Monash University [3]

Hello Ahmad,

Firstly, I wish you good luck for receiving the scholarship.

You have well explained why you want to continue your studies in the 2nd and 3rd paragraphs. I don't find your letter too long but you should adjust your 4th paragraph and make it look more professional. It shouldn't seem like you just pasted some sentences from their website: "First, this university has an international reputation and its ranking ..." Try to paraphrase this sentence.

There is also one mispelling that is repeated throughout your essay: thorough - through

Best,
Ezgi
ezgifilik   
May 23, 2017
Research Papers / Essay On Early Childhood Play and Education [3]

Hello Amy,

I would suggest you to review your essay in terms of grammar. Here are the some mistakes:

Current research has lead us to the idea - has led us
more education activities - educational
There's many different opinions - there are

I like your quotations but to me, you should smooth the transition between the quotations - that would sound more natural. And if possible, try to decrease the number of quotes since it's a bit difficult to follow like this.

In general, I like your essay and the points you made. Good luck!
ezgifilik   
Nov 3, 2016
Scholarship / I've chosen the Intercultural Communication for Business course since I believe that it fits for me [6]

@Holt
Hello again,

I've slightly changed the second sentence, hope we are on the same page and I made the change in line with your point:

"As well as that the existence of cultural factor in translation is a self-evident fact, intercultural communication is also unimaginable if the message is not transmitted through translation."

I was not satisfied with the end of essay, so it's a great idea to move that paragraph to the bottom.

Thanks a lot!
ezgifilik   
Nov 1, 2016
Scholarship / I've chosen the Intercultural Communication for Business course since I believe that it fits for me [6]

@Holt
Thank you for your valuable comments. I didn't delete the career plans part because they ask how my career plans relate to the course I have chosen, but shortened it.

I hope I could cover the lack of transition sentences. Afterall, what do you think about the essay in general? I'm lucky to have found this website and you, by the way. Otherwise I was going to submit it as it was before. Thanks a lot again, looking forward to your comments.

I received my bachelor's degree in English Translation and Interpretation. As well as that nobody can deny the existence of cultural factor in translation, intercultural communication is also unimaginable if the message is not transmitted through translation. My current job also requires being sensitive to the potential issues of cross-cultural communication. It's my responsibility to establish common ground with our international partners which effectively makes me the bridge between them and my company by finding the balance between different business processes of both sides.

The course matches well with my future plans also. My long-term career aim is to start my own import/export business, and short term plan is to develop a career in an international organization, where effective international communication is a key to success. I intend to equip myself for the demands of the global workplace through this course.

My chosen three university courses:

University of Warwick-MSc Intercultural Communication for Business and the Professions

Aiming to offer intercultural learning in a cosmopolitan environment, University of Warwick provides me with the best setting to do my master degree in this field. With its core modules developing an understanding of the notions of culture, identity and communication, I'd add intercultural communication skills to my English proficiency and my contact with the multi-lingual world would be more effective. The option modules including International Business and Marketing across Cultures would enable me to customize my MSc programme and bring me closer to my career goals. We can also perform an experimental placement within programme, which allows me to apply my knowledge of the MSc ICBP in a real-life context.

University of Surrey-MA Intercultural Communication with International Business

The reason why I chose the University of Surrey is based on a combination of its high placement in the rankings and its excellent ties with industry. The programme offers the expertise of multidisciplinary group of academics at the School of English and Languages, as well as an opportunity to benefit from close affiliation with the Surrey Business School that has projects linking us with companies and allowing us to apply our knowledge in the workplace. Another best aspect of the programme is the chance to attend numerous conferences, seminars and workshops covering a range of topics, which would deepen my insight into business across linguistic and cultural boundaries.

Edinburgh Napier University-MSc Intercultural Business Communication

Things making the Edinburgh Napier stand out from other universities for me include their great emphasis on fostering entrepreneurship skills. As a young person who looks to start my own venture, I would be able to benefit from two incubator spaces -Moffat Center and Bright Red Triangle- which offer free business advice and mentoring for students through enterprise start-up activities, social innovation projects etc. Furthermore, the university offers workshops by Confident Futures, a personal development programme, which would increase my competitive edge with employers. It's also a great chance for me to grow my network that I would have periodic guest lectures by Scottish government consultants or financial sector professionals.
ezgifilik   
Oct 30, 2016
Scholarship / How my goals relate to the UK-Turkey relationship? Career Plan - Chevening Scholarship [4]

Hello all,

Could you please give me idea what I can write about how my goals relate to UK-Turkey relationships? I've searched but couldn't find any common ground. And feel free to comment on my writing, as well.

Outline your immediate plans upon returning home and your longer term career goals, considering how these relate to UK priorities in your country.

A goal setting plan is a bridge between our today's dreams and our tomorrow's realities. When you have a career plan mapped out, you can increase the likelihood of those career plans being met. Besides, goal setting gives us motivation and confidence to achieve them. Throughout my own lifetime, I have set many goals including personal, academic and career goals.

My immediate goal on completion of my masters is to excel in "international sales/marketing" and "import/export" responsibility area of a global and leading company in its industry in my country. Since this kind of roles involves significant customer interaction, it will help me combine my academic skills with business experience and prepare me for the road ahead. Working in a large corporation would also bring in the opportunity of improving my collaboration skills by sharing the same work environment with colleagues from varied cultural backgrounds.

The fulfilment of my short-run objectives will facilitate my long term goals. During my time working as an international sale specialist/import-export specialist, I would look forward to developing my networks and building my client base. When I feel I have gained adequate level of knowledge with regard to every aspect of an established company, I aspire to start and operate my own business which would create job opportunities for other people as well.

My chosen master programme at this stage forms the first step towards realization of my career goals. The International Business Communication master programme will enable understanding at a higher level of main cultural issues that must be taken into account when doing business in a multicultural setting. I'll also have the ability to apply theoretical models to intercultural business contexts, including international sales, commerce and marketing. Furthermore, I strongly believe that Chevening scholarship will provide with an excellent network of people from different cultures and backgrounds and offer me lifetime opportunities to broaden my horizon.
ezgifilik   
Oct 30, 2016
Scholarship / I've chosen the Intercultural Communication for Business course since I believe that it fits for me [6]

Hello all,

Thanks in advance for all your comments. Here is the question:

Outline why you have selected your chosen three university courses, and explain how this relates to your previous academic or professional experience and your plans for the future.

I've chosen the Intercultural Communication for Business course since I believe that this course fits in perfectly with my academic and professional background, and career aims.

I received my bachelor's degree in English Translation and Interpreting. Translation isn't only about translating sentences, but also to interpret the cultures of the communicants.

As well as that nobody can deny the existence of the cultural factor in translation, intercultural communication is also unimaginable if the message is not transmitted through translation and understood by both sides. By doing my master degree in this field, I believe that I will acquire basic insights into intercultural communication and linguistics with a focus on cultural theory that will strengthen my linguistic knowledge as well as get acquainted with life and institutions in the UK. In the business world, the top priority was the language skills until recently, however with the rise of globalisation; employers are placing a higher value on intercultural communication skills. My contact with the multi-lingual world will be much more effective if I add international communication skills to my English proficiency. I would like to enhance my intercultural communication skills not only by undertaking this course, but also taking advantage of studying in a foreign country.

The universities also mention on their websites that the program is ideal for graduates of English language who would like to deepen their insight into business across linguistic and cultural boundaries.

My current job also requires being sensitive to the potential issues of cross-cultural communication. As an EU project assistant and translator, it is my responsibility to establish common ground with our international partners which effectively makes me the bridge between the company I work for and our partners by finding the balance between different business processes of both sides. I've been trying to improve my cross-cultural communication competences since I faced my first intercultural communication challenge at work.

The course matches well with my future plans also. My long-term career aim is to start my own import/export business, and because this sector has a multinational workplace, effective international communication is a key to success. I intend to equip myself for the demands of the global workplace through this course. My short term plan after finishing the course is to develop a career in an international organization. To have a successful international business career, I would like to develop my skills to turn workplace diversity into advantages and learn how to effectively manage multi-cultural expectations.

I will compile the knowledge I acquire on this course with the specialism of my first degree, and go into the globalized workplace with a comprehensive understanding of intercultural communication.
ezgifilik   
Oct 30, 2016
Scholarship / "Before you are a leader, success is all about growing yourself"; my favourite proverb and Chevening [7]

Thank you very much for your all comments! I've just deleted the parts you think unnecessary. I was going to delete the first 2 paragraphs, but when I deleted EVS part completely, I had some missing Word count and added my definition of leadership again.

What do you think about the footprinting content? Do you think I could Show that it has something to do with leadership skills, or not.

And do you think it's rude to indicate that trainings prices are really high?
ezgifilik   
Oct 29, 2016
Scholarship / Over the years I have seen how one door leads to another. Networking Skills / Chevening Scholarship [2]

Chevening is looking for individuals with strong networking skills, who will engage with the Chevening community ...

Over the years I have seen how one door leads to another. Every time one makes a new contact they are then linking up with a new circle of people, and can gradually build a list of contacts, and these personal networks can be an invaluable resource both socially and professionally.

I have demonstrated my networking skills throughout my career. In my current role, I regularly search for NGOs across Europe and liaise with them to establish cooperation for upcoming projects. Since I'm the only one who can speak English at my department, I could effectively build my project partner base and now, the majority of my work consists of maintaining contacts and providing communication between my department and the NGOs.

My strength in networking and communication has also directly contributed to our success as a department. For instance, I have recently introduced one of my friends, the general manager of an association in Istanbul, to my manager thinking the possibility of cooperation between us. Now we are working together to write an EU project to apply for grant. Introducing two people who can benefit from each another is one of the fastest ways to grow a network.

My network has also delivered much value in my freelancer jobs. I never had the need to look for a job after my first interpreting and translation experience because every single opportunity fell into my lap through my networks. All our teachers focus on the importance of building "what we know," but they never once touch on the importance of building "who we know". Although education and experiences are still highly valued, we should never underestimate whom we know and who knows us.

I intend to use these skills in the future when I start my own business. I can test out my ideas, gain information from a wide range of sources, or find potential partners through my networks. I already started to attend networking events in Turkey so that I can build the right relationships in advance that will enable my start-up to take off effectively.

Besides, a lot of jobs aren't advertised nowadays for many reasons, people recommend people they like. And in many cases, the employers prefer to take employees as references from known people. Therefore, I suppose that I can use my networks and get inside scoop while searching a job during my need.

As the saying goes, 'your network is your net worth'. I wish to use my networks to build visibility and open doors for new opportunities.

Many thanks in advance!
ezgifilik   
Oct 29, 2016
Writing Feedback / A good leader today can listen to people and let them engage in the decision. [3]

Hello Fanceen,

I hope these would help you improve your essay!

We often talk about that leadership plays a ...

... to do what he asks

... to do what she likes

She always lets Tim, her boy, to make decisions like learn what kind of instrument he would like to learn or chooseingwhere as their family's vacation place.

They won't just listen to the people who is the same age as themtheir peers.

If he does that, who will choose hehim as the president next time?
... what kind of competition we will hold? .

... especially the one who cares

... boss iswas such a nice person

it'swas like his baby. On the contrary,

Soon he quitted the job
ezgifilik   
Oct 29, 2016
Scholarship / "Before you are a leader, success is all about growing yourself"; my favourite proverb and Chevening [7]

Hello guys! I have just discovered this website. I was about to submit my Chevening scholarship application. Your comments are very welcome, thanks in advance!

LEADERSHIP

Leadership means different things to different people. To me, it's not about managing people, but encouraging and inspiring them through one's actions. A personal favourite proverb of mine:

"Before you are a leader, success is all about growing yourself. When you become a leader, success is all about growing others."
-Jack Welch, Former Chairman and CEO, General Electric

Many famous people may have spoken on the topic of leadership, but the quote above is my personal favourite because it exactly defines how leadership is about others, not you. Leaders often focus on themselves but this is a short term achievement. If their focus is solely themselves, then they may become an expert or professional, but not a leader. I know that a great leader is the person who encourages and grows people and forges the way for them. I may not have all the answers, but I have my journey and I'm very willing to share it.

As a student I was very hard-working and determined; simply doing the tasks assigned to me was never enough. I have an innate drive to go above and beyond and a perpetual desire to be outstanding. Rather than focusing all my time on studying and achieving good grades at university, I put some time aside to work on extra-curricular projects which would develop me professionally. For instance, the Erasmus Study Mobility Program was very popular among university students; however my lecturer, believing I should go for an advanced alternative, asked me to consider the Erasmus Internship Mobility Programme, which I accepted. No student or lecturer at my university had ever undertaken this programme so I became the pioneer of the complex application processes involved for my university, and furthermore, after having completed the 3-month internship programme in a London-based translation company, became the guest speaker at Erasmus events promoting the programme. Many students across Turkey were inspired by my talks and became very keen to apply, so in between such events I have spent the last year assuming a mentoring role for students preparing them for their foreign internships.

After finishing my degree, I organized a graduation ball for over 100 people and then returned to my hometown. Most of the fresh graduates chose to find a job as soon as possible, but I was keen to gain more developmental experience and discovered the European Voluntary Service (EVS) programme. I volunteered for a Europe Direct desk at the Municipality of Bologna for 1 year and returned to my country for work as an EU Project Assistant for a reputable private company in Izmir. I was highly effective at pre-empting problems, but when they did occur I saw them as an opportunity to improve the service. My duties in this post chiefly involved the coordination of a wide range of events and interpreting when required between three languages. Occasionally I held group talks on my EVS experience which provided people with the opportunity to ask questions and request my recommendations.

I am very grateful for the opportunities I have had so far in life which have rewarded me with the confidence to be a representative and motivational speaker to large audiences and to people on a one-to-one basis.

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