Writing Feedback / Many people watch television and movies on a daily basis. This can affect their behavior. How? [2]

How do movies or television influence people's behavior? Use reasons and specific examples to support your answer.

Many people watch television and movies on a daily basis. This can affect their behavior. Television and movies have positive and negative impacts on people's behavior.

To begin with, television can instill good morals in people, especially children. People want to be like films heroes of the films they watch. Choosing the appropriate movie enables them to learn how to be courageous, patriotic and have a positive impact on the society. For example, watching Will Smith's movie "The Pursuit of Happyness" has taught me a lot about self motivation and courage.

On the other hand, television plays an important role in spreading hate and violence among children and adolescents. Action and horror movies, that contain a lot of scenes of blood, have a negative impact on the human subconscious. When people watch their favorite actors playing the roles of gangsters or bad people, they will try to be like them. For instance, my neighbor who is a fan of action movies likes violence and always hits his peers at school.

By a way of conclusion, movies and television have a great impact on people's behavior. They can implement good morals as they can spread violence and hate. Thus, People should be selective when they choose a TV programme or a movie to watch.

Writing Feedback / The well behaved and educated parents are the best teachers for their children. TOEFL independent [2]

Hey,
I spent more than five minutes trying to figuring out the appropriate outline of this thirty-minutes essay. In all the TOEFL essays that I have read about agreeing or disagreeing essays, I have found that the writers agree or disagree totally with the statement. but I was wondering, what if I partially agree with the statement?

Could my essay for this question be correct?
I am waiting for your valuable feedbacks

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Parents are the best teachers. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Every child is born as a white paper. It is the role of his parents to make him a good or a bad person. Personally, I am inclined to I believe that parents are the best teachers if they are good people but if they are not they cannot be good teachers.

To begin with, in case parents are good and well educated people. They will arise their children to be well behaved.They will also implement in them good habits. For instance, personally, my parents instilled in me the love of reading books. When I was young, they used to read for me stories from different books genres. They also brought me a lot of books. This made me love studying and reading books which enabled me to learn a lot of things. This what makes parents to be the best teachers.

In case parents are not good or well educated people. They will not arise their offspring to be good individuals. They will not teach them good manners. On the contrary, in best cases, they will spoil them. For example, one of my neighbors has only one boy and loves so much which negatively affected him. She never taught him to depend on himself. She even does his school activities on his behalf. By doing this, she raised him on being more dependent on other people. This does not make her a good teacher.

By a way of conclusion, based on the reasons explored above, I am of the opinion that only the well behaved and well educated parents are the best teachers for their children.

Writing Feedback / One day visit to your country -TOEFL independent essay [6]

A foreign visitor has only one day to spend in your country. Where should this visitor go on that day? Why? Use specific reasons and details to support your choice.

My country is full of beautiful places; however, it seems to me that a foreign visitor, who can only stay for one day, should visit my city because it takes him one day to learn about several aspects of the culture of my country. In his short trip, he can visit the archeological sites, taste the traditional food and do some shopping in the old market of the city.

In the morning, he should move to the East of the city in order to visit the historical places. I live in place known by its Roman and Numidian ruins. Visiting the archeological places, will give a foreign visitor an opportunity to know about the cultural heritage and learn more about the history of my country. It will also allow him to take some photos there while enjoying the ancient architecture of my ancestors.

After visiting the archeological sites, a visitor must be hungry and ready for tasting the traditional food of my city. Going to one of the famous restaurants and ordering some traditional dishes will be a great idea. For instance, he can order couscous, which is a delicious dish made of steamed semolina and served with meat and vegetables. Tasting new food and knowing the different flavors of my country's cuisine makes part of this exciting trip.

Finally, after having lunch, it would be a great idea to the visitor to do some shopping in the old market. This visit will enable him to know more about the traditional industry of my country. He can find there a lot of antiques, colorful carpets, traditional clothes, etc. Moreover, he can buy some souvenirs and gifts to his family and friends. This will be the last activity in his short trip.

By a way of conclusion, based on the reasons explored above, I believe that a trip to my city is the best choice for any foreigner who wants to spend one day in a different country and learn a lot about it. In my city, visitors can enjoy not only seeing the archeological places but also savoring the delicious traditional dishes and buying beautiful souvenirs which will remind them of their unforgettable visit forever.

Writing Feedback / Early education for young children to help them to hone their intellectual and social skills - TOEFL [3]

Waiting for your valuable comments.

Some people think that children should begin their formal education at a very early age and should spend most of their time on school studies. Others believe that young children should spend most of their time playing. Compare these two views. Which view do you agree with? Why?

Early childhood education has been long debated by varying opinions. Some feel that children of ages up to five years should not be instructed. Others feel the opposite. I am inclined to believe that it is imperative to focus on educating young children in order to help them to hone their intellectual and social skills and to discover their talents as well.

To begin with, teaching children in a tender age allow them to enhance their intellectual skills. A recent research has shown that the perfect age for learning is in the first five years of the human life. In this period, the most important developments of the human brain occur. Teachers, who are aware of this information, use a variety of methods and techniques to stimulate these developments. They use worksheets, drawings, songs, games, etc. for instructing young learners. Their professional assistance is valuable in the intellectual capacities development of young children.

In addition to developing intellectual skills, early education allows young children to improve their social skills. They learn how to live and express themselves within a group. They also follow a number of instructions and rules set by professionals, who are in this case teachers and educators, in order to be more disciplined and well behaved. They equip them with skills that help them to appropriately fit their societies. Early education provides the chance for youngster to formally socialize and it prepares them for the future.

And beyond developing social and intellectual skills, I personally think that early education helps parents to discover and to improve their children's talents so they can develop them in an early age. For example, my friend, who is a teacher at kindergarten, has found that one her students has no interest in learning or studying, however, when she gave them some activities that involve drawings and paintings, he showed an impressive talent. My friend contacted his mother and advised her to enroll him to take courses in the school of fine arts of the city. Teachers can notice the brilliant abilities of their learners and notify their parents in order to develop them in an early age.

To sum up, children's early age is a critical period of their lives. Regardless of the disadvantages of going to school at this time, the merits are endless. As far as I am concerned, schools can provide the appropriate atmosphere that allows young children to develop their intellectual and social skills and discover their talents so they can properly use them in the future.

Writing Feedback / TOEFL Independent essay- owning smart phones by young children [4]

Some parents forbid young children from owning smart phones (cell phones with Internet access), while others disagree and believe that they are important tools for keeping in touch. Which point of view do you think is better, and why?

Smart phone is one of the most important inventions . Regardless of the fact that many people think that children should own cell phones with internet access; others disagree. In my opinion, I think that children should not have smart phones for two reasons; internet could be dangerous for young children without the supervision of their parents, besides that using internet via smartphones is costly.

First of all, young children should access to internet under the supervision of their parents. Owning a cell phone with internet access makes this difficult. Hence, smartphone is a double edged weapon; it can keep young children in touch with their parents; however, it can also be a real danger for them if they use it to talk to strangers. For example, a couple of years ago, I have watched a documentary about pedophiles who use fake internet accounts to communicate with children. That is why I think that children should not get smartphones with internet access.

Second, accessing to internet via smartphones is costly. Children may not be aware of the fact that using internet via a smartphone is more expensive than using it via a computer with cable internet connection or WIFI connection. Therefore, the hours they spend will be extended little by little. This wasted time may affect their studies in a negative way. Furthermore, there are some sites which offer goods that can be bought online. Some children may find their dream toys there and do anything to have them. For instance, I have heard that a boy stole his father's credit card to buy some toys from a website.

In conclusion, smartphones are very beneficial. However, they could be the inappropriate choice for young children because they allow them to access to internet without the supervision of their parents. Furthermore, accessing to internet via smart phones may be costly. Before offering a child a smartphone, it is imperative to take the disadvantages of the ability of accessing to internet into consideration.

Writing Feedback / Why college or university? To acquire a new knowledge and prepare for a future career - IELTS [3]

TOEFL Independent Task 1

Q:
People attend college or university for many different reasons (for example, new experiences, career preparation, increased knowledge). Why do you think people attend college or university? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Attending a university or a college has a great influence on shaping people's future. People pursue their studies at university or college for many reasons. In my view, the two main reasons are acquiring new knowledge and preparing themselves for their future career.

First, people attend university or college in order to increase their knowledge. People can be specialized in a specific field of study of their own choice by attending university or college. For example, in my case, after passing my baccalaureate exam, I have chosen computer science major to purse my undergraduate studies at university. By attending this course, I have learned a lot about computers and their architectures. I have also got familiar with numerous softwares. Moreover, I have programmed an application as a part of my graduation. I will never achieve these accomplishments if I did not join a university.

Second, people go to university or college to prepare themselves for their future career. The knowledge that they acquire at university or college they will exploit in real life situations in their jobs. For instance, after my graduation, I worked at a private school as a teacher of computer science. During my work, I taught my students how computers work and how to use them. I was also responsible on the state of computers, so whenever computers got damaged I fixed them. Studying at university has crafted my career.

To sum up, people attend university or college to increase their knowledge which they will use later in their future careers.