Graduate / SOP for Automatic Control Engineering at Polimi [2]

You keep mentioning goals that the university aligns with on a personal basis, yet you never mention what these goals are. You have to show a relationship between your goals, what the university offers, and how it can help you achieve the goal. You cannot just say it aligns and that the university can help achieve the goal. The 2 sources need to gel to create a united goal that you, as a student, can benefit from. The essay suffers the most in these missing references. You are very fond of referring to non-existent goals. You cannot make the current status of research or teaching at the university your goal. It does not work that way.

Graduate / PhD Microbiology SOP University of Wisconsin [2]


Do not go so far back into your history. This is a statement of purpose. Focus on your academic history from the onset. That means, you will do better to discuss your college thesis and how you developed the idea behind it and the content. Do not say "Growing up...". Instead, you can indicate "Over the decades, I have observed..." or something else to that effect.


Do not mention unpublished work. The reviewer only cares about the published work that you can provide.

You seem to have a good foundation for your next step of studies. However, It could still come across as simplistic in presentation and aim to most reviewers. Perhaps you can mention some potential breakthroughs or something that could help spice up your research foundation and increase your profile as an applicant?

Writing Feedback / IELTS Writing task 2 : Many people feel it is a waste of money to try to save endangered animals [4]

The essay will receive an automatic failing score because it comes in under the minimum word count. There are only 230 words in this essay that has a 250 minimum word count. When you do not meet the word count, the examiner will note how many words are missing in the essay and then deduct it from the preliminary Task Accuracy score. That normally equates to failing half the test immediately. Then the additional errors, such as the incorrect response format that you gave, and other grammatical errors will be added on the total deductions, leading to a failure to achieve a passing base score for the task. You have to ensure meeting the word count to avoid the auto fail score.

Writing Feedback / Writing task 1: The chart below shows the percentage of different types of household waste [2]

Kindly rewrite this practice test to achieve the proper maximum word count for the task 1 essay. This should number between 150 - 200 words only. 220 words is similar to a task 2 essay already. You cannot write that many words during the actual test. It is important that you time yourself during the practice tests, if your reviewer does not come with a countdown timer, because you will not have any timer with you during the actual test. If you spend more than 20 minutes writing this task, you will definitely not finish the task 2 essay and you will have failed both tests in the process. Scoring is based on the relevance of the short essay, not the length of the essay.

Research Papers / Combating Bullying in Schools [2]


The content of this section is purely hypothetical. There needs to be a sense of how this type of training can be implemented among educators and students. The website does not offer any helpful advice regarding how this can be accomplished. Additional authoritative sources should be included that suggest actual training programs or materials for use in this area of anti-bullying education.


Separate the first half of this section. Create a section that deals with how bullied students react to the bullying and the effects it has on them in the sense of wanting to hide things, among others.


Again, there are suggestions without action. There needs to be a sense of how the situation is actually handled. What are the current consequences in place for students caught bullying fellow students?

Undergraduate / Hardworking, motivated and caring - University of BC Personal Profile [3]

Your response is incorrect. For this essay, your family, friends, and community must see you in varying ways. This is a character trait essay that should help the reviewer understand how you function in various situations and why it makes you an asset to that group. So changing it up per community would help your application a lot. You should find something to be proud of about yourself that actually combines all 3 different traits in the accomplishment (if possible). This does not have to be focused on your chosen major or what you hope to accomplish in college. The accomplishment should only reflect the person that you are, based on the perspectives of the other people who interact with you.

Writing Feedback / Why are so many medical assistants and nurses facing burnout? Eng assignment [2]


Reverse the presentation. Give the signs and symptoms of a burn out first, then provide the medical definition. It would help the introduction if you could use a personal reference point, indicating that you are recovering or have actually experienced burn-out. This would allow the reader to understand that this research paper has a deep meaning for you and therefore, your perspective may be considered authoritative by the reader.

There is a citation format conflict in the History presentation. You have to fix that as it makes the section difficult to read, understand, and follow.


Remove this redundancy and focus on the extent of the problem instead. Replace it with more of a Covi 19 background in relation to the pace of burn-out development in the community.

Letters / Motivation Letter for MSc Human Computer Interaction in Universität Siegen [6]

The first paragraph starts strong. You could still expand upon it to show your definite interest in the course based on your career goals. Mention where you see this masters course leading you in terms of your career when you finish it. Be definite. Talk about the career path you want to take and give an overview of how you see the course helping you achieve it.

Does there course allow you to go directly to a masters course of study without any professional experience? You speak of college participation and an internship which only qualify as academic experiences. The reviewers normally look for at least 2 years of work experience in a related field before admitting the applicant into the program. Please include a professional experience if you have one or any at all.

Graduate / Masters in Computer Science application Statement of Purpose (SOP) [2]


Since this is published work, you need to provide the issue specifics such as the date of publication, volume number, issue number, and such for the information of the reviewer. In case he wants to consider your work in relation to the purpose of your study. It would be better if you could connect this article to the current work of the 2 professors and indicate a desire to update this knowledge by working with them or expanding upon the research so that it can have more relevance to the course you wish to study. Reviewers always appreciate evidence of knowledge updating.


Tell the reviewer more about this. Where did you volunteer? In what capacity?

Writing Feedback / Argumentative Essay - Social Media is Bad for Youth [3]


Let's make this more interesting. Can you name the highest user age group and number of hours spent on social media?

There is an error in your opening presentation. You are supposed to be presenting an argumentative essay. Therefore, you should be seeing the good in both sides for the introduction, leading to the main opposition topic in your thesis statement, which should offer a comparative slant for the rest of the reasoning presentation. This is a compare and contrast paper for the most part since it is argumentative in basis.

Reasoning wise, this paper focuses only on the negatives of social media. It is therefore, no longer argumentative but rather, a single opinion paper. A true argumentative paper would see the pro and con for each reason that is presented. As the writer, you should only be guiding the reader in developing a personal opinion rather than trying to convince the reader that your opinion is the correct one.

Graduate / USC Graduate Interactive Media Personal Statement - Why interactive media? [4]

I lost interest in reading your paper towards the middle part. I kept looking for the relation to creativity and animation. The creative spark and ideas that would show your creativity and other aspects as the prompt indicated. Too much time was spent discussing the pre medical route, wich is irrelevant to this discussion. I would shorten that if I were you. Try to focus on your creative side for the most part of the essay. That is what the reviewer will be looking for. This essay is not ready for submission as of now. It is too person focused on the incorrect academic side. If you were looking to enroll in medical school or continue with pre-med, then maybe this essay would have been more useful.

Undergraduate / University of Toronto Computer Science Supplemental Question [3]

Reverse the presentation. Speak first of how you wanted to join the robot olympiad in Panama and the problem you encountered. Then proceed with the information presentation you have here. You may need to revise the presentation to suit the word count but the additional information at the start of the essay will certainly help the essay become clearer to the reviewer. Right now, you are starting the presentation in the middle, without first explaining why your mindset was such. The end result of your goal was impressive so it is just a matter of framing the response in a manner that would highlight that accomplishment at this point. Work on a better opening presentation.

Graduate / Opinions on my masters degree autobiography for CS (Taiwan) [2]

I am considering how well the reviewer will receive this information considering that these are all academic, and thus theoretical accomplishments on your part. You have volunteer work experience which means it was unpaid and you were not really able to contribute your skills to the workplace situation. It is important that you come across with some actual work and leadership, or at least, consultative experience in your biography so that you can prove that you have work exposure that can use the information you will be gaining from the masters course. Right now, the presentation is a bit bland and not really interesting enough to excite the reader into finding out more about you and discovering what your potential might be should you become a masters student at the university.

Graduate / Structural engineering passion - Personal Statement for Graduate Admission [2]


I do not believe that it is a good idea to mention these two professors in the presentation. You may inform as to how they influenced your mindset and career, but refrain from mentioning that you want to work with them again. There is a chance that you will not be able to work with either men a second time so the statement should come across as more hopeful of working with any professor at UW. After all, their professors should get equal consideration when it comes to research assistants or mentorships. Overall, it is a strong essay though that touches on the important point. Being an alumna of the university already scores you some bonus points.

Research Papers / The Rise of Automation and Its Impact on Job Opportunities for the Working Class [2]

The essay does not feel like it has a beginning. That all too important introduction + thesis statement is missing from the presentation. The paragraph being used to kick off the research is actually a part of the middle presentation already. It cannot be used as an alternative opening statement because it uses in-text citations already. The introduction and thesis statement is supposed to be free of that sort of information because it is a presentation that sets the stage for the discussion. it is the platform or foundation of the total presentation. While the rest of the paper is informative, the missing element has the reader wondering about the actual history of automation. When did it start? How did it evolve to this point? That is what the introduction should be all about.

Research Papers / critically discuss how considering colonialism helps you to deepen your understandings of evolutions [2]

I am not sure about what you are trying to accomplish here. Are you supposed to be doing only summaries of the written works that you mentioned? Or are you expected to deliver some personal insight into the writing? It appears to me that the work you have done so far is just summary focused and nothing more. Yes, it delivers the history of Colonialism, but what else? There is no clear thesis statement that could direct the reader towards a better understanding of this paper. I realize the paper is not yet finished. However, you should have presented a clear direction for the discussion at this point beyond just summarizing the information that you have read. That is where I believe the weakness of this presentation lies.

Undergraduate / Most significant challenge: rebuilding my self-esteem after losing a love for a sport - UC prompt [3]

I think the response will be better written if you add a back story at the beginning. Why did you love flag football? What sense of fulfillment did you get from it? What were your grades like when you still enjoyed the game and it contributed to your academic accomplishments? Show a slow spiral from love to dislike. When you directly say you quit the game because of certain situations, you leave the reviewer with more questions than answers. This is a written interview so you have to make sure that your response is complete and offers a clear understanding of how reached the end result. You have to understand that the reviewer needs to be able to imagine what you were going through. Do not soft soap it too much. Being real is important in these essays,

Letters / Motivation Letter for Erasmus Mundus Joint Master Image Processing and Computer Vision AI [2]


Kindly edit this paragraph in particular to not sound like an extended version of your resume. The reviewer is not interested in your duties and responsibilities while working at the company. He is interested in how you developed your skills in relation to Image processing and Computer Vision AI. Which programs did you excel in using at these companies? What were the results?


The reviewer is not going to believe this statement. Be honest and tell the truth. You worked with a team right? He is going to be interested in understanding how you function in a team setting.

Which of the 2 subjects you mentioned will be your possible thesis? Is there a chance you can narrow it down to one for now since you can replace it in the future? Try to present a clear path towards your final studies if possible.

Scholarship / Chemical Engineering - Academic objective and long range goal essay [2]

Actually, your response is incorrect in the sense that you speak of your long term goals, but not of your academic objectives. You have to discuss the academic goals as these relate to your long term career plans. You should not be repeating the programs of the university ad verbatim and telling the reviewer what you expect to gain from these, without premising it on your academic goals first. So you will have to revise the total response to align the professional goals with the academic reasons for wanting to study the course at the university. Plans are not the same as academic goals. You need the academic goals as these relate to your career plans.

Undergraduate / How I've been a Bridge Builder in High School (250 word limit) NYU Supplement [3]

Unless you are aiming for admission as a diversity student, there is no need to mention that you one an applicant from South Africa. The reviewer will already have countless reminders that you are an international student applicant. What your should clarify is how you were exposed to the international debate stage and why your observations pushed you to become a bridge builder. By the way, consider adding being a participant to the event aside from the organizer roles. It still has a bridge builder role.

Your interest in participating in the baking festival came out of nowhere. I guess that is why it was not developed enough If does not carry the same excitement and interest that was displayed in the earlier paragraph. It would be better to not present that information anymore. It just distracts from an interesting presentation.

Scholarship / CHEVENING: LEADERSHIP THROUGH EMPOWERMENT [2]

Remove all the references to your internship and college experience. Those paragraphs do not contain actual leadership discussions. The claims made there fall under your duties and responsibilities as a trainee. Do not confuse training with leadership. The community based experience does not work the way it should either since it happened 5 years ago and again, you only stated your duties as an organizer. There was no follow through into 2023 that would prove you have the abilities of an emerging community leader. Revise the essay to start after your graduation instead. The key here is to prove that you have professional leadership abilities that can be honed and developed over time. Academic experience is not acceptable. The keyword is "professional".

Scholarship / Motivation letter for EMJM Image Processing and Computer Vision AI - Review Request [2]

I do not get the vision that you have for pursuing the course which could have resulted in the motivation that pushed you to apply for this scholarship. The opening statement that you wrote is not really interesting and does not provide an interesting hook that would make the reviewer want to get to know more about you. Every person with an interest in computers claims to be a technology enthusiast. AI is quite a new technology that the statement you made about it is empty and irrelevant to the previous statement. You need to fix that paragraph and fast. Paragraph 3 is not really a necessary part of an EM motivational letter. You will be considered for the scholarship based on the same criteria as everyone else, who are also previous scholars of other programs so your claim is not going to make an impression either.

Scholarship / Political landscape of Bosnia and Herzegovina - Chevening career plan [3]

While it is admirable that you want to work closely with the UN in your desired role, it should only be one part of your career plan. The Chevening scholarship committee will want to read about the programs that the UK are supporting in your country , within this field, and how you envision yourself working with the UK agency directly towards the fulfillment of their goals, in alignment with your own. Please remember that the career plan prompt is asking you to specifically consider the programs that the UK has in your country. So the essay that you wrote will need to be revised and edited for content to feature the UN aspect, but prioritize and highlight the UK participation in your short and long term career goals. While the UK is a member of the UN and they do work on projects within the supervision of the UN, the DFID or other UK agencies may have independent projects in your country that Chevening may be participating in via its alumni scholars. Hence the need to focus on the UK.

Undergraduate / The Innovators Club - U of T Computer Science Supplemental Question [2]

You cannot use a group setting for this response because the prompt is asking you to respond on an individual basis. You cannot use a blanket reference for discrimination either. You have to be very specific with your response. Who was involved? What was the discrimination you witnessed? What was the result? How would you have changed things? I know that using the organization actions sounds more important and shows you fully participating in problem resolution but that is not what the prompt is asking you to discuss. This is an individual response statement. The reviewer wants to know if you are a racist, or if you have any discrimination that could affect your participation in the student community in a negative manner. So you have to be personal about your response by discussing something personal in relation to the prompt. This about you/I, there is no "we" in this presentation.

Scholarship / Chevening Networking Essay - Wicked Problems [3]

The approach to the response is not applicable in this case. You have responded using your academic exposure to simple networking situations. You do not meet the requirement for building and maintaining relationships in a professional capacity. The experiences shared here are all presented within a controlled academic setting. There was no professional growth and network branching out that could result in you becoming a better professional with a network of people and organizations you can approach to help you with your current or foreseeable projects. The network has to be functional and cultivated because you are expected to increase the network of professionals that the other Chevening alumni can approach should their need to do so arise. This is about an exchange of networks. Your network, at this point, is negligible and unimportant to the Chevening cause.

Scholarship / Blue Economy (Product Owner) - Career Plan - Chevening Essay [2]

Delete the last paragraph. That is not part of the career plan. Those are areas of study that you need to complete. That is a totally different subject. You have actual titles and positions in mind and you discuss what you plan to do within those positions, but it is unclear how you plan to achieve those positions. What will you have to do to achieve those plans? What is the path towards career achievement? That is not clearly defined in your presentation. You need to have a time frame to achieve these plans as well. Can these all be achieved within 5 years or less? Consider the active role that the UK organizations will play in your plans. Discuss how you see them actively participating in your plans.

Scholarship / Get into Professional Networking (Product Owner) - Networking - Chevening Essay [2]

There is no reference to professional relationship building skills here. You are speaking of your student experience, but have not cultivated either of them into a network that has helped you professionally. As a freelancer, you would actually have more opportunities to build, cultivate, and promote these networks that you gained from your days as a student. Your community network does not show any proficiency in professional promotion for yourself either. The networks exist as acquaintances, not as working professional roads that you used to promote your growth within the profession. Did you notice how this essay is a one way street? You never exchanged actual professional experiences which could have led to professional network cultivation. That is not how the Chevening network works.You have to show how the network has helped you grow professionally not only through skills development, but through business dealings as well.

Scholarship / Chemical Engineering - If you are not awarded the Scholarship, what are your plans? [2]

Do not over reach with your response. Offer an explanation only for the plans as required should you not receive the scholarship. Your higher education plans beyond this phase is not really important at this point. It is not something that would make an impression on the reviewer because it is not required information. The statement is strong enough with your explanation regarding how you plan to pursue the best possible grades for yourself during the national college entrance test. That shows that you have a plan B that would help you achieve your professional ambition and foundational career goals. They do not need to know that you will try to enter the university again in the future for your advanced studies. Their focus is only on the current and present status of your application.

Undergraduate / My Determination and Inspiration for Mathematics in High School (Common App Prompt 1) [3]

The prompt you have chosen speaks of a part of your character, interests, hobbies, or other subjects of interest to you. It is an essay that is supposed to give you an opportunity to highlight something that makes you special as a student applicant. It should not merely be a continuation of your interest in Mathematics. While I can understand why you have that special interest, I do not believe that it works well with this particular prompt. I would rather than you use this as a reference for the open topic prompt. That way you will not have to change aspect of the essay that you have written and you will be able to continue to advocate for your skills and interests in Math as your chosen major in college. If you want to use this common app prompt, then you will have to write a totally new essay based on the possible subject focus I mentioned earlier in this thread.

Undergraduate / "Unity in Diversity" - How to become a good candidates for GLOBAL UGRAD ESSAY [2]

While your discussion about your growth and development as a community leader is admirable, you have missed out on one important aspect of the discussion. While you are looking forward to what the Global UGrad program can impart ot you in terms of knowledge and skills development, you have not considered what you can bring to the table to share with the other participants. What makes you stand out as a person? As a leader? As a citizen of the world? Sure you have all of these experiences within your community, but how would you translate that into a bigger scale? How would you apply these to make the program more diverse and active for the incoming batch of participants? Try to shorten the leadership story within your community. Expand on it based on the international platform that would be needed for the Global UGrad program.

Undergraduate / The podium in Panama - University of Toronto Computer Science Supplemental Question [2]

This is a good response but it is not an accurate response. The prompt is focused on having you discuss an ongoing self improvement project. Something that you know needs improvement in yourself, as a person, but cannot be easily achieved without a proper support group or adviser. So while this response shows a need for self improvement, it is not the kind of long term reference that would allow you to properly address the prompt. It would be best if you try to come up with a better answer. A second and totally different response from this one. The best adviser you could have for that self improvement discussion could be a parent, a sibling, a peer, or a trusted school teacher or coach.

Writing Feedback / The importance of Preschool Education [2]

One way of improving this paper would be to introduce the importance of pre-school education in a historical context. That means, looking back at the early beginnings of the educational system. Why was it needed? What was the driving force that made the department of education support the development of this early learning avenue? Are the laws indicating that this is mandatory for all children? Why was there a need for a law to force parents to send their children to preschool?

The paper is weak in the sense that it delivers researched information but does not acknowledge the sources. Yet, it is written in a manner that requires either an MLA or APA presentation format. Truth be told, the information provided feels more like it was AI generated instead of being actually written by a student who did the research needed to write this paper. It is lacking in so many informative and research format required ways.

Graduate / My first personal statement: Multidisciplinary PhD Program in Biomedical Sciences at Rutgers School [5]

This is way too long for a personal statement. A personal statement is normally no longer than 500 words, with 750 words as the maximum allowable limit, unless otherwise specified. You need to make the paragraphs shorter and yet still informative. Be concise. Do not overstate and do not over extend the information presentation either. Truth be told, I did not even finish the first paragraph when I first saw this essay because I saw its length and decided to review other essays first. That is the same reaction that the reviewer will have to this presentation. Keep it short.

One way of shortening this essay is by removing irrelevant points such as the paragraph about your teacher's assistant job. If it does not relate directly to your skills and research as a Biomedical Scientist, then it can be omitted. I actually skipped that paragraph while doing another round of reading of your paper and it actually flowed better and became more focused without it.

Undergraduate / My Passion for Helping Children in Need (350 words) - Boston University Supplemental Essay [3]

Use a more relevant hook in your opening scenario. You are trying to set up the essay to focus on your interest in Children's Rights and how these are being violated in your home country. Use the story of the boy to reflect how your eyes were opened to the stories of children's abuse in the area. Before that though, indicate a period of observation that led you to think about how child labor laws in your country need to be addressed because of the way it opens up children to abuse. Then use the story of the boy as the dynamite that pushed you towards action.

You can remove the story about tutoring the kids. It removes from the drama of that was building up in the story you were relating. You do not need to hit 350 words. That may be the maximum but the sweet spot is actually 300. Believe me, the reviewer will appreciate the quick story telling on your part. It helps you get to the point quicker and the reviewer will be able to assess your essay much faster.

Scholarship / The actions of humanity in polluting the earth - a reference letter for yourself describing yourself [3]

Try to match up your words with everyday conversational English. For example, people would not normally say "my immense gratification". Instead, they would say something like "my privilege" or "my honor", which are more accepted in everyday conversations, which this letter is supposed to be.


Give your end of year position in the overall year level. The claim you are making lacks supporting information.


How did he perform on the national level? Did he win a place on the podium? How did he accept defeat if he did not win? That would show his character when faced with disappointment and failure.


This would be more admirable if you were a part of the a community organization of some sort. Please name the organization if you are part of one. If not, then indicate that you are trying to start one in your community and mention the reception of the community to the action.


This normally connotes a period of time leading up to the death of a person. Please rephrase this portion.

Scholarship / ERASMUS MUDUS SCHOLARSHIPS ON EUROPEAN PUBLIC HEALTH MASTER. Europubhealth+ [2]

The requirement for the statement of purpose is that you have a desire to attend 2 universities instead of just one. Since this is a double masters degree, you should also be discussing both universities as they co-relate to the focus of your masters studies. This essay seems to focus only on the 2nd university and the 2nd year of your course? Why is that? Is this only a draft as you have not decided upon what the first university will be for you?

I believe that the mention of what your college thesis was could be helpful n this instance. Try to prove a line of continuing studies and research based upon that college research path. By showing the relationship between that past and your idea for your future research, your purpose for studies should become stronger and allow the reviewer to see that you are on a continuing learning and application path in your desire to help the HIV afflicted youth of your country.

Scholarship / Empowering Innovation Through Connection: My Path to Chevening [3]

You have not shown any actual use for these so-called networks that you think you have created. You are only discussing the skills you built through these events that you attended. There is no evidence of how you have used these networks in a professional setting. The network you claim to have built cannot be considered as one that might be useful for the Chevening network due to your lack of proper cultivation and utilization narrative in this response statement. While you have attended these events and learned from them, what Chevening needs are actual working networks that show how you can assist the past, present, and future scholars by having a network that can support them as needed. If you have not used these networks professionally and can prove evidence of that usage, then this is worthless to your application.

Scholarship / Navigating Leadership Challenges: A Journey of Growth in Biology Education and Research (Chevening) [2]

Your experience as a practicum coordinator does not reflect a potential for your growth as a future leader and influencer in your home country so I would not over emphasize that role in this essay. Your role at the government agency might have some potential to prove a future leadership and influencing role for you although how that can happen is not clear in the statement you have presented. Basically, this is one confusing mess of a leadership and influencing essay. There is no logical flow to the presentation as you are going back and forth between scenarios. That makes it difficult for the reviewer to read this and piece together any leadership and influencing abilities you might have.

Research Papers / Reserach on The Role The United States Has In The Palestinian Genocide [3]


This is just one of the many examples in this essay of how you make declarations that are not backed up by academic and authoritative sources. You cannot make statements claiming certain things are factual and true without citing an actual source to prove that claim. For this statement in particular, you are making a inflammatory claim that needs to be supported by researched historical, or recent information.


Review and edit the presentation. There is a difference between "the U.S." and "the us". The lower case equivalent does not inform the reader that you are talking about the United States as a country. Remember that even the acronyms for countries need to be written in capital letters to differentiate it from other word references.

The essay has too many in-text citations, without enough personal perspectives involved in the presentation. For each citation, a personal opunion or explanation must follow to show that you chose to cite this information based on a personal understanding of the situation depicted in the quote.

Letters / Motivation letter for CERN 2025 Technical Student Internship programme for civil engineering. [4]

You have barely changed the original content of this letter, which you submitted under a different username in the past. Which is why I do not really see any reason why I should put any effort into giving you advice for improving the motivational letter. You do not value the advise that is given to you and you break the rules at this forum. Unfortunately, I still have to give you advice since you were given a final chance by the forum administrators.

Make the letter more concise. Do not focus too much on the backstory. Target your relevant academic accomplishments and previous internships or work based training that would tie into the unique abilities, skills, and knowledge that you can bring to the program. Indicate how these would also be beneficial to your advanced learning at CERN since you will have the ability to update your knowledge and skills in relation to your previous learning. Keep it simple, clear, and concise. Focus on the motivation and how you plan to achieve it