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Posts by Hetav Pandya
Name: Hetav Pandya
Joined: Sep 23, 2018
Last Post: Oct 27, 2018
Threads: 7
Posts: 15  
Likes: 4
From: India
School: The New Tulip International

Displayed posts: 22
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Hetav Pandya   
Oct 27, 2018
Undergraduate / Being a fearless orator is what I am proud of. Self presentation essay [2]

UBC personal profile question



Question :- Tell us about who you are. How would your family, friends, and/or members of your community describe you? If possible, please include something about yourself that you are most proud of and why. (maximum 250 words)

My Response :-
I am a wild fire of determination satiated by the fuel of knowledge. My ardent desire to accomplish various feats no matter how adverse the situations are has earned me the title of being "Ambitious". It fits me & helps me harness my full potential. Being the school topper I could be contented, but I knew I could achieve much more. It has been a major driving force in many competitions that I have won may it be the Inter-School Rotary Quiz or the Inter-School Debate competition. It was never the ambition to win but that to learn which has made me who I am today. I pursued advanced level courses in physics, chemistry & math to prepare for the JEE Advanced exam because it helped me master the concepts to a level much beyond our school curriculum.

Being a fearless orator is what I am proud of. It didn't come all of a sudden, I messed up many times & learned it the hard way. The initial mockery & embarrassment was the price of my ambition. I realised that the fears we don't face become our limits. I decided to shatter those limits. I attended the Toastmasters club & learned the art of public speaking by participating in various competitions. My efforts paid off as today I am the recipient of 8 English & 4 hindi speaking prizes. To be honest, it is the struggle that I endured and not the awards that I am proud of today.

Please rate it out of 5 points
Hetav Pandya   
Oct 19, 2018
Writing Feedback / Online courses as an alternative to classes delivered on campus - Ielts2 [3]

huge amount of using - heavy usage of internet
At the first point - On one hand
well quality - good-quality
poor conditional - poor/under developed countries
revolutionary aspect of
There are a few more grammatical errors and I would score it as 5/9. Don't get disheartened you can always learn and improve your works :)
Hetav Pandya   
Oct 10, 2018
Undergraduate / Reasons to choose UWaterloo and Software engineering [3]

Thank you Holt for your suggestions are these edits alright :-
# I want to build a startup in cybersecurity to aid companies fight cybercrime and identify potential threats through AI.
# UWaterloo's innovative environment and supportive teachers is what I need for my launch my startup.
# Description of one of Ian Goldberg's work :-
Cryptographic and online voting that can not only save time but also drastically reduce the amount of money required.
# I will delete the first line and remove the mention of Dana Porter library [ Do I really need to remove this :( ]
Hetav Pandya   
Oct 9, 2018
Undergraduate / Reasons to choose UWaterloo and Software engineering [3]

Question -

Write the reasons to choose your course and the University of Waterloo.



My Response -
It had been my dream to work with computers & master the software behind it. I learned to code in HTML, C# & visual basic making around 40 programs in python. The more I learned the more passionate I became. The process of choosing software was gradual & based on my desire to specialize in cyber-security & AI. My search for a university that could provide me education both practical & theoretical led me to Waterloo. I want to take part in Hackathons & Co-op programs to master the skills I will need in future. Waterloo also had the best fit to quench my thirst for books, the Dana Porter Library. Reading blogs of professors like Ian Goldberg ignite me to learn more.Startup-Incubators like Velocity, is what attracted me the most because after all what leads the world are not only machines but also ideas.It will help me to change my dream of owning a startup into reality.

Note - Ian Goldberg is a professor at UWaterloo.
Hetav Pandya   
Sep 28, 2018
Undergraduate / Request to review my AIF for University of Waterloo on Programming Knowledge [4]

writing about my programming knowledge and skills



Question; Comment on your programming knowledge and ability to build well structured programs (600 characters)

My Response :
I have learned coding in HTML, QBasic, Visual Basic, C#. I am learning python from UWaterloo website "Python from scratch". I have made numerous webpages in HTML connected by hyperlinks, a calculator & much more in C#. I made programs to calculate:

Cost of painting a room
Cost of an item using conditional discounts & taxes
Cost of an industrial steel plate for my dad
Target heart rate and to,
Convert numbers to roman numerals
Jumble up words in different manners

I have built a program in Python that detects double space in my AIF. It was necessary as I had a faulty space bar.

NOTE :- With a character limit of 600 characters I request for suggestions to make it look more presentable rather than just factual.
Hetav Pandya   
Sep 28, 2018
Research Papers / Is the Brain a Product of Consciousness? - comment on 3 major weaknesses in paper [2]

@Razumikhin2018
"When different states of consciousness are experience" - Grammatical error
" He identifies as a" ??, I believe there is something missing in the Pretorius paragraph
" Max Plank for after whom"
I don't have words to thank you for the knowledge you gave me. Keep posting such mind-blowing works.
Hetav Pandya   
Sep 27, 2018
Undergraduate / The freedom to think, innovate and create something solely using imagination and logical reasoning [2]

my AIF application for University of Waterloo - software engineering

Question :-

Reasons for choosing your program and UWaterloo.

(900 character limit)

My response :- What could give me the freedom to think, innovate and create something solely using my imagination and logical reasoning ...software was the answer. A set of well-organized characters shaping into a expedient program fascinated me. As I learned, my interest grew, firelocks, data integrity and cryptography revolved in my head. My ardent desire to build a world free from cybercrime made me read Ian Goldberg's work on cyber security and privacy.

Being renowned as the most innovative university in Canada for 26 successive years and having edified people like Peter Masak and David Cheriton, the University of Waterloo has been my dream destination. I wish to develop my skills and learn from erudite professors like Richard Cleve. Its co-op program and startup incubators like Velocity surely act as a push factor that indisputably make me choose the University of Waterloo over all the others.(920 characters)

Do give me suggestions to fit in the character limit without loosing the essence of my answer.

Should I include my programming knowledge as I do know languages like python and C# (and many more) or leave it for the answer which mentions "State your coding experience"?
Hetav Pandya   
Sep 27, 2018
Scholarship / Starting my own clothing business - Leadership and Influence essay [5]

@ruthmargaretha21
This is a very good sample of leadership, the reader understands well about your role in coordination but I would suggest that it would be better if you also include task that was done by none other than you(if any). It will help to create a good image that you are not only an all rounder but can also take on an independent task. Apart from the suggestions given by cao1km I do not have more to add.
Hetav Pandya   
Sep 24, 2018
Undergraduate / My tours - review my Personal Profile (about myself) for UBC [3]

my Personal Profile for UBC



Question 1 :- Any other additional information about yourself.(100 words)

My Response :- I have toured 12 countries, changed nine schools and lived in eleven houses. I have learned to mingle up with different cultures and make a friend circle that has broken the boundaries of nations. I am like a thirsty lad who runs after knowledge. My love for mathematics is immense, that is why I took a course of "Zhusuan" and Mental arithmetic clearing all the eight levels. My teachers complained that I was a talkative boy, few years passed, and now they praise me for being a good orator. I have learned to change criticism into challenge, problems into opportunities and failures into unforgettable lessons. (105 words)
Hetav Pandya   
Sep 24, 2018
Writing Feedback / It is an argue whether businesses have to be responsible for their effect on society or not [4]

"tax to run the government"
"provide job for employees"=>"eradicate/substantially reduce the problem of unemployment"
"affected on people"
"fortunate those ones"
"gave almost his fortune", how much, I bet Bill Gates will not give his entire fortune :)
Use Recapitulating instead of in conclusion
Make your conclusion clear as stated by @terminal 28
Hetav Pandya   
Sep 24, 2018
Writing Feedback / Solving environmental problems: international organization or local government ? [2]

@TrangDiem11
Your essay has a good coherence, but I would like to suggest that you can include a few facts and figures along with names of certain independent international organizations. This will show the reader the depth of your knowledge about the topic. You can also refer to other environmental problems too rather than revolving around just carbon and global warming.
Hetav Pandya   
Sep 23, 2018
Undergraduate / An impromptu speech without any earlier preparation - my response for a problem [3]

Question 2:

Explain how you responded to a problem and/or an unfamiliar situation.


What did you do, what was the outcome, what did you learn from your experience?
( Maximum 200 words)

My Response :- During one of my summer breaks, I had enrolled myself for the Youth Leadership Program organized by none other than Toastmasters Club. It was divided into various sessions where we were taught different aspects of improving our speeches. Soon the days passed and there came the table topics session, where we had to deliver an impromptu speech. I was one of youngest amongst all the participants, and being inexperienced believed that they would give us at least a minute or two to prepare. No, I was wrong, they gave us no time to prepare. Adding to my troubles I was the first one to be called to the podium. The fear of making a blunder paralyzed me, there was no time even to calm myself down. "Your topic is importance of positive attitude", I nodded. I controlled my fear and somehow came up with an idea. I decided to speak on my struggle to get merit in grade nine. All this happened as I was walking from my seat to the podium. I was able to deliver a speech good enough to get me the first prize. That was a memorable day, I did realize that confidence can shake off your greatest fears and to a mind that is calm, the whole universe surrenders.( 214 words)
Hetav Pandya   
Sep 23, 2018
Scholarship / QuestBridge Miscelleneous Short Questions for college application [3]

But in this case not for me - But this isn't the case for me
I had pride - I was proud
I will also recommend you to switch to another example if possible as most of the colleges are keen on academics and this might turn against you.

You could also mention the name of the author
not to follow - for not following
You might mean diary when referring to journals, both are quite different

You could also use a wide vocabulary and make complex sentences to make it more pleasant to read
Hetav Pandya   
Sep 23, 2018
Undergraduate / Request to review personal profile for admission in UBC [4]

" I had finally learnt the art of diplomacy" becomes "This newly acquired art helped me emerge out as one who can judge a person by his choice of words, predict his actions by his mere expressions and deliver the nastiest lines in the nicest way."

I will manage the word limit. Thanks for your prompt response.

@kartikt
Your Amherst essay is fabulous and I can find no further improvements other than that stated by holts.
Hetav Pandya   
Sep 23, 2018
Undergraduate / Request to review personal profile for admission in UBC [4]

Question :- Tell us about an experience, in school or out, that taught you something about yourself and/or the world around you.(Word limit- Maximum 200 words)

my first Mock United Nations assembly



My Response:- I was in grade 10 when I participated in my first Mock United Nations assembly. I was selected as one of the youngest representatives from my school as I had developed good communication skills. I was a good public speaker and had recently secured first rank in inter school debate competition. I had come prepared with a lot of facts and figures and was well versed with all current happenings about the topic which was given to me, that is "Human Rights Violation in Sri Lanka". Our first session started and I grabbed opportunities to present my facts and challenge other delegates on their stand. What went wrong was not the speech or confidence but the diplomacy. I had neglected who my real time allies were and whom to defend. It taught me that when to speak and what to speak was more important than how to speak. My ardent desire to learn and improve did pay off in the next Mock United Nations Assembly where I was the delegate of United Kingdom and the topic was "Cybersecurity and Cybercrime". I was appreciated by my mentor and even the chairperson for my performance. I had finally learned the art of diplomacy.(Actual word count-201 words)
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