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Posts by hafsa abid
Joined: Apr 6, 2011
Last Post: Oct 29, 2011
Threads: 4
Posts: 40  
From: Pakistan

Displayed posts: 44 / page 1 of 2
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hafsa abid   
Oct 29, 2011
Undergraduate / "You make happiness with your own hands"-UW Madison- academic goals and circumstances [4]

overall an extraordinary narration....the narrative thing you talked about in the start....well it wasnt true that way...but if you have written this essay provided with some conditions...otherwise its okay with it....secondly...honestly when i read the title of your essay i wondered why it was yet unanswered....headline was catching...you picked up the topic well and continued consistently...i found everything fine and perfect in it....just the thing i am yet confused about...is what was the purpose behind writing this essayyy??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????
hafsa abid   
May 8, 2011
Essays / how to work on directed writing [14]

i have the same...sciences...but also pak studies,islamiat and maths....nt add maths...after exams i will submit one ov ma essays...i want ur remarks specially...meeshal...
hafsa abid   
May 3, 2011
Essays / how to work on directed writing [14]

ok i will also wait and specially to know your result in english...you probably will achieve an A*

well...when are you appearing in exams...
hafsa abid   
May 3, 2011
Essays / how to work on directed writing [14]

yeah it was quite helpful...i am from lahore pakistan...studying in divisional public school....what about you...and my teachers are not kinda helpful enough too...
hafsa abid   
May 1, 2011
Essays / how to work on directed writing [14]

thankuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu... ....but i didnt found what u basically wanna convey...
hafsa abid   
Apr 28, 2011
Essays / how to work on directed writing [14]

being an o level student,i am facing problem in directed writing thats worth 30 marks....i need help in how to deal with it properly....please
hafsa abid   
Apr 10, 2011
Essays / Need some instructions to write a good descriptive essay of a person [3]

hi Bouazza...

Writing a best descriptive essay....in my opinion...is the essay which incorporates both description and narration...in fact this is the thing what you will be doing all the time...you will have to use descriptions in narration and narrations in description....there are many essays on this forum which are an example of such type of writing...i suggest you to consult them

THANKS...
hafsa abid   
Apr 9, 2011
Writing Feedback / corrections in my essay "aspects of teenage life" [18]

of course...yet also to my opinion...being different from others is cool...abnormalities are cool.... i had like to mention this as thats what i am experiencing....
hafsa abid   
Apr 9, 2011
Writing Feedback / IELTS task 2: Developed nation should tackle refugee problem [8]

yeah they do...i agree...the country to which i belong...Pakistan... is some kind of different case...we can neither call it developed nor undeveloped....but its still playing a role in accommodating refugees from other countries...
hafsa abid   
Apr 8, 2011
Writing Feedback / Are we free to make our own choices in life, or are our decisions always limited [6]

Although it sounds appealing to make one's own decision freely, it is actually an impractable(impracticable) goal as the society has exerted significant influence and restrictions on individuals and has shaped one's value of what they should do and what they should not do. In today's society, people are more free to make our(their) own choices than we were before, but it is true that we canno (cannot) indulge(try to find any alternative word) our interests at the cost of transgressing the basic rules of the society.

The first example is about the choice of curriculum. Nowadays, we are much less limited when choosing extracurriculum(extracurricular) activities and collegial groups than people were before; however, there are basic disciplines (restraints) which must not be neglected such as Mathematicis, English Literature, Physics and Chemistry. These disciplines are compulsory because they will greatly assist your future career and well-being, while choosing to ignore these compelling courses will undoubtedly result in a great obstable since you are not equipped with some of the most basic skills. Furthermore, you will be less likely to enroll in an outstanding university or college, which can be attributed to your choice of not taking these basic disciplines. Actually, everyone is provided with a concrete and immutable schedule for daily couseswhcih (which) will not be altered by any individual student withour a reasonable application and cogent explanation. From this example, we can see that there are courses that we hove to choose to study. In other words, we cannot make a choice totally freely on which courses to take.

Another example is about filial responsibility. Turning to Chinese society, it is a written law that every grown-up should look after his or her parents if economically permitted. One of my neighbour is a vile women, always shouting against her parents and asking her parents for money.I usually herar
(hear her)augument(argument) with her parents on economic issues. In fact, she does not shoulder the responsibility of a daughter to take care of her elderly parents; instead, she throws herself in the cyberspace, not willing to take on a job to "act as" a daughter. She may not be punished by law; however, every family in our community has acknowledged her notorious reputation and malicious behaviour. As she decides not to take care of her parents, she has broken the basic law of the society--conscience. Her case indicates that people who make choices regardless of the rules of society will be injurious to not only the people around them but also themselves.

the idea discussed in above paragraph is good
In conclusion, we are more or less limited by the rules of society when making decisions. However, as far as I am concerned, these rules should bot by(not be) regarded as obstacles, but should rather be considered as contribution to the stability and harmony of the hole (whole) society.

some points need more clarification....otherwise the ideas discussed were unique and good...may i know at which level you are studying.?
hafsa abid   
Apr 8, 2011
Writing Feedback / corrections in my essay "aspects of teenage life" [18]

yeah....actually typing wasnt done by me so i couldnt do it...thanks for the tips

and one more thing...the word normalities i wrote was because they are creating issues on normal features...wasnt this point of view correct?
hafsa abid   
Apr 7, 2011
Writing Feedback / [Ielts]anti-social behavior,why and solution.. [4]

There are several reasons in contribute to this phenomenon.

do you think it should be "in"...maybe...to my opinion...."that" is more suitable
hafsa abid   
Apr 7, 2011
Writing Feedback / corrections in my essay "aspects of teenage life" [18]

Teenage life is one of the most alluring part of an individual's life. Although, in accordance with my opinion, i dont believe in the wonders of teenage life. I dont agree with the common view that teenage is the most beautiful age in the life of a man. I believe in the fact that teenagers are the ones who undergo most of the sorrows and dissatisfactions of life.

While teenagers, the immature adults, move on with time, they face many challenges and problems. As they are those who are midway between childhood and adulthood, the changes in their mental abilities bring about a revolution in their calm and peaceful world. The adolescents though enjoy the wonders of life.none are able to get what they they should have or what they aim to get. Teenagers render this as the most unfair aspect of this age.

the toughest load on this age is studies;the time when they have to decide the aspects of their future.which field they have to opt in future depends upon how diligently they avail their abilities, skill and aptitude. Although bieng the toughest,these are no doubt those precious moments they wish to enjoy again. Their colours are just apprehendible for those who have done with it.

coming to the interest of most teenagers; the teenage crush, which means to them more than anything. when it is also true that this is the love they forget with time and if they are reminded, they just laugh and exclaim "was this the thing we were ready to die for HUH". so nothing to worry about, just enjoy and dont spare your precious tears for it.

independence is one aspect that secures the first place in teenagers 'demand list'. they reckon it to be the key to all happiness. but beware!!! it is a key to more horrible aspect. What the teenagers demand for is latest model cellphone, enjoy party at friends' place and open choice to move about. although they are leading to adult age, the idea that they are enough sensible to tackle with situations is wrong. basically, they are not yet mature in their mental level and are attracted to such liberties like a moth to a fire. they blame parents for not allowing them but it is a very necessary move that the parents make to restrict their enigma to one particular direction.

most teenagers are in a complex of their appearance and surroundings and want to see them as a perfect model and so little disabilities and "normalities" in their features are big issue for them. "i am fat" or "i am ugly" or "i am not good at that like him/her" are the most audible things they claim. well i would suggest them to adopt the opinion that superiority or inferiority is basically decided by your performance in studies and the way of life you spend; as all of you are gifted with the same talent and abilities. and remember "nobody is perfect".

Death of a parent or sibling (god forbid!) seriously impacts ones life. you actually feel left out when your friends and people around you talk about their respective parent, being very rich or brave or intelligent, when actually you have lost that person. you may have to face certain financial and domestic problems too, due to which you cannot lead a life of a normal teenager. this situation is not only for people belonging to a certain age, rather for people of all ages. and the worst thing is that people around you dont treat you normally,making your loss a constant drawback in life.

the worst aspect is maybe being a drug addict. in third world countries. it is quite common among teenagers. drug addicts live in the world of their own and so are "dead" to the world.

thus, curtailing the aspects, its clear that the aspect of teenage themselves have their good or bad sides and depends upon how the situation is coped up.keeping in view your abilities, i suggest you to enjoy your teenage to its full length.

hafsa abid
hafsa abid   
Apr 7, 2011
Writing Feedback / [Anne Boleyn] - Famous person I want to meet [6]

thanks for information...you have helped me to access to anew personality....thanks....apart from only your benifit...it is also helpful to others....THANKS
hafsa abid   
Apr 7, 2011
Undergraduate / "unusual to see a soldier contribute to his nation" Commonapp essay to Ivys [14]

sorry....actually thats my problem that i cant convey what i want to say....i meant that allocating a title to it is quite difficult as more than one aspects are discussed of the life of boy...thats it...and what do you mean about your own life experience....did you really know someone like that...you see it partly seems unrealistic kind of character...

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