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Posts by jaijagadeesh [Suspended]
Joined: Feb 24, 2012
Last Post: Apr 6, 2013
Threads: 7
Posts: 13  
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From: Ireland

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jaijagadeesh   
Feb 1, 2013
Writing Feedback / Some people prefer change while some dont -IELTS [3]

Topic."Some people prefer to spend their lives doing the same things and avoiding changes. Others, however think that change is always a good thing. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

Different people see life in different ways.Some want to keep their monotonous life unchanged. However others are more adventures and they keep their life changing . There are various reasons behind theses changes ,this essay will enlighten the causes.

Some people never change their daily routine,the reason would be they enjoy what they are doing and it is important to them.further more,many people agree their jobs are monotonous,but they say they are delivering a productive out put,for instance computer engineers . It is certain their job is most boring,but their work out put have great impact on the online world,and it passively help common people in large. Even though some people life style is tedious but they are happy what they are doing,and they are adhere to their life style

Having said that,some people frequently change their jobs and way of life. They get bored with tedious life,these individual seeks some kind of adventure in their life. There are many people that,they have changed their jobs and embraced thrilling occupation such as,mountaining,wild life adventure,and some time they dedicated their life towards charity works. Furthermore,some other individuals think their life is stagnated and they go on traveling,keep on change place and jobs for new experience. Some time change become imperative for self satisfaction.

To put it in nut shell,changing way of living is depend on person and their life style. Some changes are necessary for pursuit of carrier,and some life needs no change if they feel happy with environment,especially for older people change of place could have great impact on their routine life and they will lost in new way of life.
jaijagadeesh   
Dec 16, 2012
Undergraduate / Reflection; This course work helped me improve my drawbacks and enhance my knowledge [8]

Despite all advantages of this work I had some difficulties as well. On the one hand it was difficult to choose the components of personal computer for my family.. This sentence is not clear,I don't understand what do you mean to tell.

Due to rapidly developing in technology field there are huge amounts of different components of computer so it was problematic to choose the most suitable one because all of them have special features .This is confusing sentence,and there are no commas. This sentence can be rephrased like this.Due to high competition in technical field,various computers available in the market,most computer comes with special features.Therefor it is hard to choose suitable one.
jaijagadeesh   
May 3, 2012
Writing Feedback / IELTS,ESSAYSome people think that museums should entertain people [2]

Some people think that museums should entertain people, while others believe that the purpose of museums is to educate. Discuss both views and give you own opinion.,i would heartily appreciate if you correct my essay.

Museums reflect our past and most us want to keep our heritage alive through these galleries.They hide many important things and these are invaluable information should be cater to general public.However many individuals are visiting museums as an excursion so they demand they should be entertained.Because they claim all are unable to understand art.both views will be discussed and finally i will pen down with my opinion.

Many museums preserve vital information about past.So it is lucrative to share that knowledge to common people to understand the way of life that had lived by our ancestors.In addition many painting and ancient modals are the best source of present inventions.In fact to days scientist are coping the old scriptures to build modern machines,for instance,sample pieces from Da Vinci collection are the role modules of many modern hi-tech inventions,including airplane.Therefor it would be beneficial if museums should serve their purpose for education.

Nevertheless,some people believe that everybody who visit art galleries are unable to understand arts.Specially many young people want to see museum as an entertainment.So they demand instead of educative they should be entertaining.For instance,3D theaters or music collection museum etc.These individual perception is visiting such places as apart of leisure not for educational purpose.Therefor they claim entertainment should be given priority in museums.

To conclude with my opinion,it is true that everybody is not capable of understanding complex things about art,moreover some are not inserted to learn about these things.Hence art galleries should educate in entertaining way,or there should be separate section for entertainment for leisure seeking people,by providing this both purpose will be met.
jaijagadeesh   
May 3, 2012
Writing Feedback / Essay on how to be culturally competent (applies to nurses too) [2]

Hi, your writing is quite good.It is imperative to understand background of patient before commencing treatment.However first we should understand our cultural and its limitations.It is vital to understand clients social and psychological background.This reflect their culture and religious practice,as you mentioned about client who refusing to give up rice eating,some time nurses become sandwich between consultant and patient,doctor orders some diet but client refuses that and it is really hard to convenes.To my mind the way we Approaching to patient is very important,i noticed many nurse never bother about patient mental,physical and social status and they do as they have been ordered,nurse should take an account of clients status,"even auto mechanic repair vehicles according to their make".As RN i always consider my client mental,physical and sociological status.i think if nurses take this in to their account while caring them,then i think it is patient centered.
jaijagadeesh   
Apr 23, 2012
Writing Feedback / IELTS - Full time employed men & women should share house hold chores evenly [3]

Dear readers,i would be graciously appreciate if you correct and advise me.

Men and women employed in full time job have to share evenly house hold chores and caring for children at home.Do you agree or disagree.

In the days gone by,house responsibility was belongs to wives ans out side job used to be a husbands duty.In twenty first century both men and women are working equally in various fields.Present generation is of equality no gender is superior or inferior,and they should share same responsibility particularly both working full time.I certainly agree with the statement.

Today's world is of equality,and highly intolerance to any kind of bias.Specially if both husband and wife are working full time.It is immoral if man is enjoying leisure time while woman is doing house chores after hard work in her job.Since both rubbing their shoulders in workplace,why cant help each other in domestic works?equal distribution in house chores is better and justifiable.It is inhuman to force weaker sex to do both works.

Male chauvinism is still prevalent in many society.However this shows partiality and imposing all domestic responsibility to ladies.Child rearing is not sole duty of wife.Both should equally take this responsibility on their shoulder and full fill the child needs.Blaming and victimizing women for child bringing up is not acceptable in new era.Sharing house work is imperative for smooth running of family

To conclude,it does not go with out saying,"sharing is caring" couple should accept their responsibility.Burdening on one person would not be ethical.Child rearing and house chores must be shared equally and it is a moral duty of both husband and wife.
jaijagadeesh   
Apr 20, 2012
Writing Feedback / IELTS: Advantages and disadvantages of staying away from families. [15]

[b]Hey, i have written same topic and i guess it is relevant to topic,
[/b
]
Increased demand in the university education forcing students to flay away from home.Pursuing education from native place and abroad have advantages and disadvantages.Living in home provides safe and controlled environment,and it can deter unnecessary expenditure.However student may not live free life and miss group studies.In this essay both sides are discussed with substantiation.

Staying with parents would be advantageous,it provides a safe environment and spending on food and accommodation will be less.Living in hostel or other places would not be safe.Alcohol and drug culture in students are at peak,consequently staying away from home would provide more chances to fall in bad company.Furthermore,due to increase cost of living studying in the universities is expensive.Pursuing higher education from house will help to limit expenditures,and this help minimize financial burden on parents shoulder.Hence it is certainly beneficial to commence study from home,it will be economical and youngsters will have less chance of trapping in bad company.

Nevertheless ,there are cons of continuing study from home.Due to controlled environment students will not enjoy their freedom of university life.In home parents are always supervising their children,their academic and personal activities are under control of parents.Constant supervision may restrict their individual decision,and apparently they become depended on home.Further more group studying and learning other culture and language will be deterred.Learning new tradition and language will only possible if one leaves home and dwell in different environment.Lastly home atmosphere will not yield proper study environment,and more chances of distraction from daily routines of house.Therefore,living and studying away from home would provides advantages in learning new things.

To conclude,living and educating from home has pros and cons.Staying with family will help in saving money and controls children from falling from bad company.On the other hand,due to over supervision and lack of exposure to different language and culture will limits the knowledge of children
jaijagadeesh   
Apr 16, 2012
Writing Feedback / IETLS essay - If a product is of good quality and meets people's needs [2]

If a product is of good quality and meets people's needs, people will buy it. Advertising is unnecessary and is no more than a type of entertainment. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Selling goods became a big challenge for entrepreneurs.To days world is all about show business,if you do not advertise your product then its chance of selling is slim.Product genuineness would be revealed by advertising.I don't agree with statement,even though goods is of highest quality it needs to be shown to public before it would sold

Impressing customers is became big challenge,due to surplus product in market public has wide varieties of product to choose.Many of these goods are of high quality,however with out proper advertising it is difficult to show their availability and advantages.Hence commercial glorification is an imperative part of goods selling.

Further more,advertising acts as a window to select right product at right price.Commercialization is an integral part of business.Even movies are promoted months before they release .Trailers tempt and motivate viewers to rush when it releases.Despite of product quality it is important to show product glimpse before it arrives at market.Good adds creates curiosity in customers and force them to buy it.

Nevertheless,good product need no advertising.It will sell by its name,there are many companies that are standing tall with out any glamorization,for instance,Sony,Toyota,etc.However due to high demand in publicity these renowned companies are battling to stay in their position.

To conclude,advertising is very important to sell a product,despite its good quality.Enormous variety of goods available but only the advertised products have more chance to consumed by public.However a few companies that are established long ago they need less promotion,still they have to indulge in promoting.
jaijagadeesh   
Apr 13, 2012
Writing Feedback / IELTS: Financial success enables individuals to acquire a comfortable and relaxing life [7]

Hi,your essay is perfect apart from some minor grammatical mistakes.However,in second para you should have used different supporting subject or have given proper supporting argument.

a health body is a prerequisite to achieve a enjoyable life. If some people were unwell in bed for years, they could neither appreciate scenic views around the world nor taste delicious food.

A billionaire suffering from chronic disease would not enjoy normal life,despite of having surplus money he is abandon to travel or even have an ordinary meal.Moreover,a good human relations play an important role in alleviating mental agony and keeps harmonies life,in spite affluence one failed to maintain content relations with his family or friends his's/her's life would be far from solace.

Even i am not good at essay but trying to add ideas.
jaijagadeesh   
Apr 8, 2012
Writing Feedback / A wonderful trip with new experience (Toronto / Global village) [2]

Dear readers,i have written my experience of recent trip to Toronto.I have mentioned most important part of it.I would appreciate if you read and pass comment on it,This is my first wring ever in my life,so please read and give suggestion on it thank you.

I have been Toronto once in last summer for my exam, but i went with my family. We had spent almost a week after exam and we manage to explore all attraction near to Toronto, including Niagara falls. It was nice trip altogether; however i enjoyed as a family not as single man. I got one more chance visit Toronto for Part two of first exam. Due to financial constrain this time i have to go alone, i was trying to book a hotel and hotels were very expensive, my wife suggested me why can't i look for hostels?, i thought that was a better idea and finally i manage to find an economical dormitory with six sleeps. Luckily i find cheap air tickets, but i have to book at least a week gap to fit in my budget.

It was at 4am i boarded flight from Dublin and whole way i was think about hostel, how it would be, what about roommates, they would friendly?, and moreover i was worried about my belongings and their safety. I reached about 2pm in Toronto, and boarded pre-booked airport bus, and it dropped me just few blocks away from my hostel since it was my second visit i was familiar with many roads, so without any bodies help i reached Global village hostel. I checked by paying some advance and showing ID prof, receptionist handed over me swap card and directed me my way to room. When i was leading my way to room my mind is little apprehended about roommates, where they are alcoholic or drug users, etc. When i open the door i saw took youngster they were about in early twenties i introduced myself to them and they too. Fortunately one was from Ireland, his name was Alon and other lad from Germany his name was Tobis, in first meeting i found them very friendly and genuine but my worries have not completely faded, still i had awkward feeling about them. After brief conversation i told my purpose of visit and they said they will fully co-operate me by making less noise while studying and told me roles and regulations of hostel ,roles have both pros and corns ,pro is we get free breakfast of pan cake and tea every morning, and con is they have (hostel) a small pub and they ply a loud music till 2am and unfortunately our room was just above the pub. After all tiring journey and kind of jetlag I was tired so much that I hardly study, or even enjoy my food, went fast asleep very soon after laying on bed. (Before going to bed I asked Alan which it the best place and cheap place to eat,he said hotdog was cheap and tasty).

Got up late in the morning at about 9;30am, I heard Alan saying please fresh up fast and rush for breakfast or else you will miss it they close at sharp 10 am. Since I was so hungry so did not delayed I ran in to kitchen downstairs with little assistance from staffs, I was not sure where kitchen was. Had lovely pan cakes and cup of coffee. I just had a glimpse in kitchen when I went collect pan cake I saw there was a facility to cook your meal, hotel provides refrigerator and cupboard or selves to keep your food stuffs, in fact later I saw many were cooking. After having breakfast I excursioned,I noticed a king size pool table in the middle of the hall, it was partly broken and fetched with plastic sticky tape, if anybody wants to ply they need to deposit $20,it was funny to see broken, malnourished pool table and ques(long sticks to hit the balls), I found hostel not so neat, still worth what we pay, but I came across many others who living in same place from long time, some were living for months to save money because renting apartment would be hefty, and everybody gets free pan cake too, just kidding . While I was going upstairs I found a strange but interesting note "If you work for 3hours you can stay 1night free". I met many strange young and old lads , most of them came on working visa, so they can travel while working. I met an Australian and had brief conversation with me he was a funny man with lots of hummer. He was out of job for moth and planning to go back Australia before he became completely proper.

After two consecutive days of pan cake and hotdog I fed up, and planning to have something nice and tasty. Headed out in search of fast food giants, soon I found one, "subway" ordered gourmet chicken roll, when it arrived I did not delayed just hopped on and started eating like I have never had before. On contrary I paid almost 4 times more what I paid for hot dog. When came back to hostel, I was just struggling to open the door, when I opened the door I was shocked, I saw I lady in mid-40 was standing in front of me with night suit. I slurred what tell her, but somehow I said "hi" she also replayed in same tone. But why she is in our dormitory, I recalled, o,o,o, its 6 bedded, but why woman in here( later I learnt there were no place for her in hostel due to full occupy).She told she is here only for one night and she came from Alberta for studies ,,, studies o god what on earth the she is studying at this age? I said to myself. She told she a student of biology, later she started showing strange things, I mean, she was not well, coughing all the time and she went toilet at least 10 times in 1 hour for brushing.it looks quiet strange, moreover like "obsessive compulsive" behavior. But I never forgotten my main purpose of visit here, the exam opened book and mugged in it. Later that night one more nasty surprise was waiting to happen at about 12;30am door opened with making squeaky noise, than a foul smell came ,then a man with heavy jacket and big boots entered I could not see him properly, because of low light. He was not removed any of his cloths just remove boots and within a seconds off he goes fast asleep, but I am a nocturnal so I could not sleep not because of my nocturnality ,but because of his smell. I got up saw Alan, To bis and new sick lady, but all were having sound sleep I was too much offended by his smell I went out for fresh air at 1am,but it was very cold and I could see snow flacks glittering under the streetlight ,it was very beautiful at least it made to forget that man's smelly odor, than I realize why to waste time since I have to study so I grabbed book and spent almost 2hours with book. Morning while we were having breakfast I asked about strange man to Alan, he said he did not know anything about him, since he(smelly man) left early in the morning even I did not know when he left. I told him about that man and a pungent odor radiating from him. We named him as a "smelly man". Tomorrow is my exam I said myself and though it would be better idea to have a look at venue, I knew it was very near to hostel, around 1km or less, I searched it on google maps. So left to search the exam hall, it was easy to see on computer (maps) but it took well over half an hour finally I found it, and enquired about all the times and rooms etc. Came back to room and intensified reading and memorizing all the Lab values and blood counts.

Exam was at 10 am, but I should at 8:50am to register and showing my Id's .I was very much tensed whole way apprehended about the questions I am going to confront, as I entered in conventional center, that's where my exam was conducted, I saw ocean of people are waiting for registration, I had time so I went in and had cup of coffee and scone and try to relax myself. Stood in long queue for 10mnts,at last my number came and submitted my ID an "Irish driving license" the inspector checked my id and looked amused and said great you got a fancy driving license he was adoring it, and he said wish I could have one these. That funny moment eased my exam tension, I got a very first seat that made me bit nervous again, few seconds later a middle age woman came and sat beside me I was accepting some young one any ways, no problem there will be no time to look beside you. I found that middle age lady was a chatter box, o god in 5 minutes she told whole her and her family history. Funny thing was she brought a basket, it had everything that requires for a family picnic, two different variety of biscuits, a big thermos full of tea, and lots of fruits, I thought how would on earth she could have everything in so short time, in fact we could not get time to scratch our ass ,I laughed to inside. Nevertheless furious moment arrived they handed over exam sheets, my heart was throbbing and race I could hear myself .Once I got question paper I just not waste time I tried as fast as I could because time is very precious in this exam, but in mean time questions are so trick and you need to read carefully, if u not read thoroughly it will easily deceive you. I manage time quite well and finished 30 minutes spearing, re-checked some question that I was not confident. When saw that lady who was sitting beside me ,she was far away from completing, I bet she could not finished in time I felt very sorry for her, after finishing I had a relived breath, and headed towards hostel that was my last night in Toronto, but I and Alona had planned before we will have night out together in fact we asked Tobis as well but he had different plan he got a girlfriend and he was going on date, so we dropped him, even it was To biss late night as well he was going to Benff(some place in north of Canada). When I came room Alan was getting ready so I dint waste time, and I also got ready and gone out for lunch. We went to ETONE shopping mall it is said that biggest shopping mall in north America, there are well over 2000 shops are there. We had a sumptuous chines meal in urban eater, than we roamed around and went back to hostel preparing for a big night out.

It was bitterly cold night,but freezing temperature could not deter our determination, as we know nothing about Toronto night clubs we asked front desk staff where to go for night clubs she suggested 3 to 4 pubs and clubs, after noting the addresses we left to have a great night out, I could not know that, it was going to be a great night of my life. First we been to THE CROCODILE CLUB" as it was mid-week there was not much crowed was there we spent about an hour and left and decided to come later since we had paid for entry fee so we could come at any time that night, by the time we left we already had 4 beers. Next stops was a beautiful club with lots of women waitress it was like a pol dance club interestingly entry was free but one beer cost $10.When we started to warm our seats we confront many beautiful girls with short cloths, they were all-around us that was very new for us and we both are quite reluctant and said, "please leaves alone" they must have thought we are other kind of people you know what I mean, yes, yes, gay. Completed two beers then left to explore other place, by the time my bladder was full and I said Alone I am badly need toilet or else I will do it on road any way 12 midnight very few people were there, he(Alon) said "no, no", we will find it out, we found one in basement of Eaton center. we relaxed our self and came up, while coming up we saw two girls were going to same place, yes to toilet, Alan told them toilets are closed, I don't what they said to him but I remember they told him you have nice curly hair. I asked where is next he said we will go an Irish pub ,we went to Irish pub one he knew and it was near to our hostel. As we enter in pub, live music was going on we sat on counter. A beautiful girl was serving that night and Alon was just looking at her and flirting with her, as she was very smart and agile at serving really adorable. We had spent almost 2 hours of flirting and drinking. Then moved to night club near by Irish pub. It was awesome, high profile club and expensive gone to bar counter everybody was full drunk but dancing very decently. I don't know what I had drink there cos Alon ordered even I don't the name that drink, he said it is called as liquid cocaine but it was a real cocaine. It was very good , while dancing a huge man came beside me and offered a vodka I refused but he stick glass in my hand, Alon told me watch out he may he gay but soon after he left the place and I sighed a relief. Club closed late at night already we had much fun, we commence our way toward hotel I told him I am hungry all restaurant were closed only hope was 'HOTDOG' I had two hot dogs even I can't stand by that time I don't remember much at hotdog stall . We return at about 3am.When we enter the room, it was quiet, but we were in so hype we made To biss to wake up and asked his date, poor boy got girlfriend just one day earlier to leave Toronto. Because of our loud noise "smelly man wok up and said sorry it is 3 am please don't make noise, on contrary Alan said no it is 3.15am,we had blasting laugh and slept around 4 am.

At 11 am in, secretory came and woke us up and said who is jai ,I said it's me what is matter I asked her she said your wife called and told you to call,I said what why my wife supposed to call u as I have my mobile with me when I saw it was switched off I said o god, she must have tried my mobile it was off. When I called her she was crying and telling why dint you called me, she was trying my cell since 14 hours(mobile was gone off as soon as I left room). After lots soaping she conveyed. I packed everything I have to vacate before 1 pm and kept my luggage at basement of hostel. Both I and Alona went shopping brought one cardigan for me and one top for my wife from ESPRIT, 60% sale was going on.At 2 pm I all set for leaving, and Alon accompanied me till airport bus stop we had brief conversation and said good bye to him, I felt I am leaving years old close friend I felt very sad had a great time together any ways he promised me we will met when he comes to Ireland. After he leaving bus came and I hopped on to airport, I am feeling sad and happy to, sad because I am leaving hostel and Toronto, happy because going back home to meet my wife and son. Altogether it was the memorable trip of life. Thanks to everybody who accompanied my in this beautiful time, specially Alon. Boarded flight to Paris then Dublin.
jaijagadeesh   
Apr 8, 2012
Writing Feedback / IELTS; Problem with tutoring job/ issue with part-time job [4]

Hi,you organized fairly well,but you would have mentioned some other difficulties.Here you are complaining about particular teacher,you would have mentioned other problems,like lack of sports facility or toilets are not appropriate.Furthermore,you can use present tens

1)"He was regularly an hour late to work, claiming that there was always traffic congestion problems". you would restructure sentence like this
suggestion : There is another tutor in my group,he persistently comes late every day with an alibi of traffic conjunction"

2) and took frequent personal leaves without noticing in advance
suggestion :He takes leave with out prior notice.These above mentioned problems are significantly hindering my personal attention to pupils and causing tremendous burden on students and other teaching staff,including me.
jaijagadeesh   
Apr 1, 2012
Undergraduate / Australia Bound- Study Abroad Essay [4]

Not only is traveling back to Australia a dream for my, but will give me another perspective in the business world,
I think if you writ above sentence like this would be little batter, :[b]Traveling to Australia is not only my dream,but it also enhance my perception in business world,
jaijagadeesh   
Mar 31, 2012
Writing Feedback / Nowadays children have too much freedom. Economic problem and self-earning? [4]

please correct my essay,i would appreciate our effort to correct my work and this will help my in improving my work,thank you.

Present world is fast and materialistic, and due to high inflation it became necessary for more earning hands to fulfill family needs. Due to some of these reasons both parents are force to do jobs and this attributing to ignoring their children .Moreover some teenagers are misusing their fundamental right of freedom. I totally agree with the statement that children have more freedom then ever.

In the days gone by, parents rearing their children with lots of limitations on them, guardians use to supervise very closely their kids. However, situation in today's world has been changed, due to sky rocketing price of day to day commodities forcing both parents to earn. This attributing ignoring of children and lack of supervision ,hence kids are free to do what they want there is no one deter them.

Furthermore, economical independence cause youngster to choose their own destination . Children can work as part time to earn their pocket money , so that makes them financially independent. Hence parents have very less control and restriction on spending. Moreover ,children, specially teenagers are misusing their right of freedom ,according to child and social welfare authorities kids should have fundamental right of freedom .However in the name of basic right children are misusing and threatening the parents to complaining to relevant authority .Hence our legal system has given too much liberty to celebrate for smart kids.

To conclude ,certainly today's children are enjoying freedom, then older generation .Growing economic problem and self-earning at early age are the most apparent cause of too much freedom, ironically present law also made parents control weak on kids.
jaijagadeesh   
Mar 27, 2012
Writing Feedback / Good habits make good human being - essay [3]

Practicing good things in our lives, make us and our surrounding happy. Every individual should engage in good deeds to becomes good human being .There are many tall leaders ,who became our role models. The reason behind their greatness is, indulging themselves in good habits .The habits like, reading books that radiates knowledge and moral , or attending religious ceremonies ,or participating in group sports ,would make a comprehensive or a complete human being .Lets discuss in detail.

Firstly, good habits are very essential for leading a harmonious life. if we look in to biography of famous people, we can learn that they had indulge healthy habits like reading books or spending their most of the time in library. Reading enhances our knowledge and perception towards outer world. There are many beautiful books that teach, the proper way of personal and social life. Hence one must cultivate this habit to lead a good life.

Secondly, religion teaches the holistic way of life, that includes respecting elders and nature .Attending these religious ceremonies will change individual behavior and make them to live a moral and virtue life. Irrespective of any religion, all teaches to become a good human being .By spending some time from our daily life in religious rituals, will inculcate high moral in people. Further more , participating in sports especially in group sports,also help us to construct our personality in positive direction .Playing in team teaches to how to be a part of team, and it also show co-ordination of each other to get success ,it could be in sports or in personal life.

To put it in to nut shell,indeed good habits make a good human being .Spending time with good books or attending religious ceremonies ,certainly bring changes in personality . And plying group sports enhance harmony and integrity in our social life.
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