Unanswered [22] | Urgent [0]

Posts by pandora
Joined: Dec 22, 2008
Last Post: Jan 2, 2009
Threads: 6
Posts: 19  

Displayed posts: 25
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Jan 2, 2009
Student Talk / Application Question January [127]

wait I submitted mine like at 10 in pacific time, does that mean I am screwed?
Jan 1, 2009
Undergraduate / how is this intro? ("have 13 ships") [7]

Meh, I dont like it,
opinions, suggestions or anything of the like; this is for someone who has influenced me

"I still have 13 ships, as long as I am alive, Japan will never take the western sea!"

Limit; even in his stand against 500 warships, the word lacked meaning to the man who defied the impossible. Even outside the realm of the sea, Admiral Yi-Soon-Shin's heart outshone the glint of his sword. Humble and patriotic, he was praised by peasants and scholars alike for his kindness and creativity. Through fortitude and spirit, he galvanized Korea into victory. Because he had never let any boundary define his end, Yi stands as my hero, guiding me in all aspects.

Rank had no flavor for him; his reverence for others had no bound. He welcomed peasants like kings and healed the wounds of ex-convicts. He held the people of Korea even closer than his life and he embraced them, like I embraced my sister following her days in the hospital. I was exuberant and words failed to describe the beauty of the world. Armor or rags, Yi's countrymen were all the same to him, and I too, realized that similar people wore different clothing; disability was a cloak and that was Yi's first lesson. I felt the urge to give back what I had and my contribution was Music for the Town, an organization where the elderly were embraced by musicians and could smile as performers made a bow.

With weapon hidden, Yi fashioned the dragon of the sea, a fearsome indestructible ironclad. There was no secret to his masterful dominant mind; he never took chances. He longed for certainty of the wind's and tide's path in battle; his certainty struck the string of inspiration in me. Yi's guidance produced a robot whose wheels were gear-toothed counted to the exact second and frame had been impact analyzed; like he knew the sea, I knew the robot's elemental mechanics: weight, acting torque force, velocity. Under its mathematical base, the robot was unleashed at competition day, and it was invincible; I had seen that from certainty, sprung strength; that was Yi's second lesson.

Political conspiracy devastated Yi's once-mighty and proud navy into 13 ships and faithless men. In time of peril, he refused to mourn for his own son's death because of fear his emotions would affect him. But when my sister lay in the PICU, her situation did affect me. Amplitudes on my sister's health monitor shortened and her health started to fail; my grades and aspirations of college and spirits were dragged south with it. Something inside me rallied me to rebound; I could not fail my junior year. Despite suppression by poor academics and fright, I triumphed beyond each; both piano and research paper embodied my strength and my spirit. When I was lost, I found a way out and I always can; that was Yi's third lesson.

It is strange how Yi's story has strongly influenced me; he has provided a revitalization of my spirits. I think back to how he made nothing seem impossible. I still hear his voice in the wind shouting, "I still have 13 ships, as long as I am alive, Japan will never take the western sea!" As long as I hear those words, he will never stop teaching me the strength in the impossible.
Dec 30, 2008
Undergraduate / how is this intro? ("have 13 ships") [7]

"I still have 13 ships, as long as I am alive, Japan will never take the western sea!"
Limit; even in his stand against 500 warships, the word lacked meaning to a man who defied the impossible, who never lost a battle. Yet, Admiral Yi-Soon-Shin's heart outshone the glint of his sword. Humble and patriotic, he was praised by peasants and scholars alike for his kindness and creativity. Through fortitude and spirit, he galvanized Korea into victory. Because he had never let any boundary define his end, Yi stands as my hero, guiding me in all aspects.

How can I make this more expressive?
Dec 29, 2008
Undergraduate / What is Brown University, I feel my essay is the worst.. [9]

I'm afraid this is probably one of the worst why essays I have ever written.
Does this make sense to anybody?
Tell us about the academic areas that interest you most and your reasons for applying to Brown.
(1600 characters)

What is Brown? 150 parts red, 75 parts green and 0 parts blue, a football team I never heard of, or a screeching crazed pop-star. Essentially true, yet unorthodox. Unorthodox is no stranger to me. Ask me to gauge altitude via barometer and Unorthodox will whisper to my ears, "Barter the barometer with someone who knows." He takes his response to amusement because he knows the correct answer is the height-pressure correlation. This was his game, and it became ours by senior year. His game was played through every homework and test; 3^4 was the new 81, Felis Domesticus was the new cat, (this part edited because it has my name in it). He challenged me at anything from Homer's Odyssey to DC circuit wiring; every bit I found inspiring. Although I have yet to win, some day I will outdo Unorthodox at his own game.

Perhaps Unorthodox is no stranger to Brown University either; perhaps he is even their embodiment. He's the way students play building Tetris on their science library, the way undergraduates are architects of their own study or even the way they express freedom in their Jazz; his and their spirits in improvisation land. Every time I imagine walking into Barus and Holley, I think of the unorthodox in Brown robotics unveiling the shroud of vision-based kinematics in spatial coordination or in Brown physics innovating the world through their condensed matter and elementary particle research. Perhaps the game I have been playing is not so singular to me; Brown, you and me together, I say we shall win.
Dec 27, 2008
Undergraduate / Summer act. char limit prob [6]

btw, i just love it how its kevin who keeps this forum alive lol
gj man, you must be really dedicated :D
Dec 27, 2008
Undergraduate / Summer act. char limit prob [6]

oh the problem is, how can i cut it down? or be more concise? the little details are what I think makes my essay fluid.
Dec 27, 2008
Undergraduate / Summer act. char limit prob [6]

Here is part of my essay. Now the problem is I have written 2992 characters already and thelimit is 3000. This one is 1371 characters, meaning the other portion of my essay is 1621 characters. I want to end strong with a statement of how research is going to define me though although the prompt is to state what you did over 2 summers.

Elementary school: A ball will bounce when it hits the ground. Will light?
Now I wanted to know. I unearthed books and internet portals, but it wasn't enough. Feynman's spirit embodied me and guided me to Stanford. I had found a course parallel to my research topic 'negative refraction,' but the supposed rigor of the course was some years away from mediocre high-school. Ironically, in the pursuit of education among the ranks of junior undergrads, it was the professor who tried to break me: "Young man, if you don't have the prerequisites, how do you expect to do well in the class?" Honestly, it never occurred to me, but I told her I could hit two birds with one stone.

Gateways opened. The professor was a bard, and equipartition was her epic; lectures on Boltzman distributions became as pleasant as playing Garner Jazz with friends. I frequented her tea-times (short for debate) and she introduced me to the colossal book shelves at the library. I studied from them; I studied until I could assemble physics from the ground up and disassemble it again. Pencil, paper and baggy eyes became a daily familiar; sleeping on books wasn't uncommon either.

Summer passed without fail. I held a research paper that would have satisfied my elementary curiosity. However if I have learned anything this summer, it's that my thirst for knowledge will never be satisfied.

Also any comments or grammar corrections are welcomed
Dec 26, 2008
Student Talk / What does it mean to be a good writer? [7]

Hi, I posted two things under the undergraduate admissions forum part.
I have noticed that I have gotten comments like good job. Other people get comments like you are a great writer?
Is there a difference? Overall, I am just curious
Dec 25, 2008
Undergraduate / Music is my way of life, my soul and my community. Rice... why this college? [8]

Rice why this college?

With the understanding that the choice of academic school you indicated is not binding, explain why you are applying to that particular school of study. THis is for shepherd school of music

Johann Sebastian Bach prided himself on having a family orchestra made up of so many of his musical children. Without doubt, he could have said the same about my family. My father is an accomplished singer, cellist, piano accompanist, and choir director, mother is violinist and my brother picks up where my father left off in cello. Me, well I am just me and my piano. Of course, like every other asian student I have met, music started out because of the parents and even how fortunate for me to carry on a legacy of musicians. However honestly, piano and music are more than the lessons and family traditions.

Once before, my piano instructor said, "If you want a profession easier than a musician, go be a brain surgeon." Of course she said that with good humor, but never had I realized the truth that hung in-between her words. Sure mathematicians impress the public with their fancy cryptic symbols and athletes amaze crowds by volumes of sweat pouring, but musicians, they do just about everything. Endurance to climb Mt Everest is required for fingers engaged in scales, arpeggios and trills. Mentality of lawyers, sharp as the edge of a blade, is required for musicians to play every note for pitch, tone and accuracy, exact. Emotions demonstrated by thespians, define the musician's artistry and make him the master of his music. Beyond musicians, I have yet to discover another profession that requires so much from a person. For the challenge I strive, and that is why music is unique to me.

Whether sunshine filters through the curtain blinds or a grayish hue shrouds the sky, tunes are plucked and chords are struck at my house. Yet, every day seems to have its own characteristics; one day rooms are humid with melancholy, another day carpet colors are vibrant with playfulness. I glance around and see a sketch of my first piano teacher; he had been a vital force in our community as a performer sparking and fanning the fire of music inside of everyone, especially me. I look at another portrait among the wall crammed with them, and I smile, because I realized I am part of a society, a bigger movement of music. Quickly bass starts to blend in with the drums, and feet-tapping enters my consciousness; I almost had forgotten that a few friends had come by to hit some tunes. My hands are off into improvisation land, my heart thumping syncopated to the down beat, and my mind whispering to me, music is my way of life, my soul and my community.

Does this make sense?
Comment and criticisms welcomed
Dec 22, 2008
Undergraduate / Incomplete cornell - rich, famous.. doctor [5]

- College of Arts and Sciences essay: (500 words)
Describe your intellectual interests, their evolution, and what makes them exciting to you. Tell us how you will utilize the academic programs in the College of Arts and Sciences to further explore your interests, intended major, or field of study.

My father, like many fathers before him, wanted his son to be rich and famous, a doctor in other words. Without doubt, he probably drew-out my life roadmap plotting out each destination; one point for Harvard medical school, another point for my PhD and another as a brain surgeon. I won't deny that I was quite brilliant in biology, but every now and then, because my father didn't understand, he would go back to his map to dust it off and sigh.

I, like many sons before me, wanted to be a physicist. My father never understood; he always said the only difference between physicists and benches is that benches can support a family of 4. Physics, why? Isn't biology so much easier for you? That was reason enough; biology was too easy. I don't know what attracted me to physics, but I assure it wasn't gravity. It took me 16 years of nurturing under Feynman quotes, SciAm magazines, physicsforums.com, and the occasional capacitor shockings to realize the simplistic beauty and inspiration in complexity that physics offers; all I can say is that the wait was worth it.

Unlike every son before me, I spent my middle school days creating chemicals from household supplies or building and taking apart gimmicks, most infamously my father's lawnmower; here I kindled my love for engineering. Although now I help lead my highschool's robotics team, I recollect my father scorning me asking what I could possibly do with a screwdriver. With a second chance, I would have told him that I love that screwdriver the same way both of us love music. It is the feeling of inspiration to create something and the feeling of accomplishment when it is made; why I would give up the world's riches to be a man like that!

I just wanted to see if it made sense, and also if the style is likeable so far; I havent gotten into the why cornell part...

In addition, grammar changes are welcome too