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Posts by duo008
Joined: Jan 11, 2013
Last Post: Apr 10, 2014
Threads: 6
Posts: 39  
Likes: 5
From: china

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duo008   
Apr 9, 2014
Writing Feedback / IELTS - advantages and disadvantages of machines instead of human to do the work [9]

Well, I think machines are more efficient than human in terms of accuracy and output. Machines can produce results with more accuracy because they are made to follow the instruction to the last point. Also, the output levels are much higher than humans as they do not feel tired or they get distracted by any emotions or feelings as you have mentioned above. :D

Wow,that is a very good example for me, THANKS!!!!
duo008   
Apr 9, 2014
Writing Feedback / IELTS - advantages and disadvantages of machines instead of human to do the work [9]

With the increasing use and development of new technology, many machines are now able to do the work which people used to perform. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this trend?

The issue of whether using of machine are bring many advantages to society is of great concern to many people. In my opinion, although using machines have many benefits, we cannot ignore its negative effects.

It is undoubted that machines can bring many benefits. For one thing, machines are more effective than human. Not like human, machines do not need rest, which means they can work as long as employers want and consistently produce high quality products without any mistakes. For another, using machines can save company's money. Because machines never ask for salary, over-time pay or pension, so employers do not need to spend money on employee's welfare. The company only needs some technicians to make sure machines are working on the right track or replace some part when machines are not working.

However, the disadvantages of machines that bring to us should not be neglected by people. To start with, because of extensive of using machines, many people loss their job. Especially in large population countries, high unemployment rate may cause crime and social instability. Apart from this, using of machines are also pose serious pollution and energy dissipation. For example, nowadays people prefer to use dish-washing machine to wash dishes and plates rather than hand washing. But they did not know that compared with hand washing dish-washing machine consume at least 2 times water and electricity to wash these tableware. As you can imagine, if thousands of families use dish-washing machines, how many water and how much electricity will be wasted!

In conclusion, although we cannot deny machines are play a vital role in people living and working, problems posed by machines should draws more attentions as well.
duo008   
Apr 9, 2014
Writing Feedback / IELTS: Reading news in the internet or newspapers ? [7]

hi, this is also the topic I wanna to write.
I tried to write the body paragraph, can anyone make some feedback to me? THX

It is the true that internet is more convenient way to get the news. For one thing, we can easily find what we want to read on internet. The search engine like Google is extremely helpful to locate the news that you want to read. For another, the news published on internet is always quicker than traditional newspaper. An obvious example is that a picture of 2014 Oscar awards ceremony use only 10 minutes to crash the twitter servers, because over 1 million people forward this picture to their friends. By contrast, newspapers readers have to waiting at least 1 day to see what happen in that ceremony.

However, some advantages of newspapers should not be neglected. Compared with the internet, newspapers are provides more reliable information to us, because news agencies have to take their responsibility to make sure their news is reliable and true to maintain their reputation. But internet news can be issued by anyone and it is hard to guarantee the new is precise and reliable. Besides, we cannot ignore people who have no idea about how to use internet like elder people or some places like Africa have not internet, so newspapers are still their only approach to getting information from the world.

duo008   
Apr 8, 2014
Writing Feedback / IELTS - governments or individuals should take care of environment? 'equal role' [10]

I wrote a new one:

The issue of whether the government should take the more responsibility to protect environment than the individuals is of the great concerns to many people. In my opinion, the individuals are also play indispensable role in environmental protection, as we are all living in the same world.

It is true that governments have great obligation to govern the environment. For one thing, the major pollutions are normally created by big enterprise and factories. It is only the governments have the power or ability to restrict or force them to control pollutions in a reasonable measurement. For another, governments have a plenty of funding, resources and ability to cope with serious environmental incidents. For instance, 2 years ago, Japan experience a significant nuclear accident, it is only the government has techniques and powers to stop and prevent public away from the nuclear radiation.

However, the individuals' impact on the environments should not be neglected, because our behaviors are seriously impact on environments. For example, if all the people in Australia save 1 liter drinking water a day, then we can save almost 20 million liters water everyday to help 7 million people who live in water deficit environmental areas, as per person only need 3 liters water for live. In addition to this, if we are often taking public transport to go to work instead of driving private car, it not only improves the traffic conditions in cities, but also reduces the carbon dioxide emission and saving energy for world.

In conclusion, although it is the government duty to improve or protect our living environment, I believe everyone on the earth does enjoy the equal role. Therefore, the individual and the government are both play vital role in environmental protection.
duo008   
Apr 7, 2014
Writing Feedback / IELTS 'helicopter model'; General test Writing Task 1: complaint letter [14]

thanks Pahan,
finally, after all your great help:

Dear Sir or Madam,
I am writing to you to inform about the defects I found in the toy helicopter model which I purchased online through your website on 14/04/2014. The model of this toy is called eagle 2000.

First of all, I was unable to charge the remote controller's battery. And after I opened the back of remote controller, I found the battery of the remote controller is actually unchangeable, because it just fixed into the controller. Secondly, I found some small cracks on both of controller rod, which is really weird, because I have just bought it for about a week and only played it for a couple hours. In addition to this, the helicopter itself has a litter bit loss of paint.

I am compelled to express my disappointment over this purchase. I do not wish to opt for any replacements for this toy, but I request you to make a full refund to me. Otherwise I will make a complaint to consumer protection association.

Your earliest response will be highly appreciated.
Yours Sincerely,
XXX XXX (179 words)

duo008   
Apr 7, 2014
Writing Feedback / IELTS 'helicopter model'; General test Writing Task 1: complaint letter [14]

When you are lodging a complain, you need to give specific details to them to find what you have purchased.

OK, thanks dumi, sometime I just have no idea how to write the opening.

Tell the color, the specific size and weight of this item
When did you buy it?
How much does it cost?

thank you eddies, you always give me a lot of details, really appreciate it!!!
duo008   
Apr 7, 2014
Writing Feedback / IELTS - Is social skill as important as good qualification? give your reasons. [21]

it's not that I mean, but here is:

OK, I see. Thank you eddies.

So i think in the 2 paragraph I should modify the sentences like that:

It is undoubted that people who are having good qualifications can stand out others who do not have those credentials when they apply for jobs.Because these qualifications can prove that you have solid knowledge and ability to take over the job well. Obviously, employers prefer to choose a person ....

that's make more sense.
duo008   
Apr 3, 2014
Writing Feedback / IELTS - governments or individuals should take care of environment? 'equal role' [10]

Some people belivev individual are more imporant in taking care of environment, others thinks governments should be major responsible to it. discuss and give you opinion.

The issue of whether the government should take the more responsibility to protect environment than the individuals is of the great concerns to many people. In my opinion, the individuals are also play indispensable role in environmental protection, as we are all living in the same world.

It is true that governments have great obligation to govern the environment. For one thing, the major pollutions are normally created by big enterprise and factories. It is only the governments have the power or ability to restrict or force them to control pollutions in a reasonable measurement. For another, governments have a plenty of funding, resources and ability to cope with serious environmental incidents. For instance, 2 years ago, Japan experience a significant nuclear accident, it is only the government has techniques and powers to stop and prevent public away from the nuclear radiation.

However, the individuals' impact on the environments should not be neglected, because our behaviors are seriously impact on environments. For example, if all the people in Australia save 1 liter drinking water a day, then we can save almost 20 million liters water everyday to help 7 million people who live in water deficit environmental areas, as per person only need 3 liters water for live. In addition to this, if we are often taking public transport to go to work instead of driving private car, it not only improves the traffic conditions in cities, but also reduces the carbon dioxide emission and saving energy for world.

In conclusion, although it is the government duty to improve or protect our living environment, I believe everyone on the earth does enjoy the equal role. Therefore, the individual and the government are both play vital role in environmental protection.
duo008   
Apr 3, 2014
Writing Feedback / IELTS 'helicopter model'; General test Writing Task 1: complaint letter [14]

You have recently bought a toy over the internet. When it was delivered you have found some problems with it. Write a letter to the toy company manager and say

- Give details of the purchase.
- Describe the problem.
- What do you expect the company to do about it?


Dear Sir,
I am writing to you to express my dissatisfaction about a helicopter model that I bought from your website recently. The model of this helicopter is called eagle 2000.

Well, the main problem is the remote controller. Firstly, I failed to charge the remote controller. So I opened the back of controller, and found the battery of the remote controller is actually unchangeable. Because it just fixed into the controller and the shape of the battery is unique, I cannot find it in the any stores to replace the original one. Secondly, I found some small cracks on both of controller rod, which is really weird, because I have just bought it for about a week. In addition to this, the helicopter itself has a litter bit loss of paint.

I am very disappointed with such a low-quality product you made. And I require full refund, otherwise I will make a complaint to consumer protection association.

Your earliest response will be highly appreciated.

Yours Sincerely,
duo008   
Apr 1, 2014
Letters / IELTS test: newspaper letter - "best neighbor in the area" competition. [8]

I got to know Mr. Robert many years ago after I had just moved in this area.

I knew Mr. Robert many years when I just moved to this area.

His excellent characters on several aspects

he got excellent personality

Now, Mr. Robert is intending to apply for your prestigious competition for a chance to win that title.

currently/recently, Mr Robert is intending to apply for your prestigious competition for a chance to win that title .
but it's not make sense, if he just intend to do it, which means he has not apply for it.
duo008   
Apr 1, 2014
Writing Feedback / IELTS - Is social skill as important as good qualification? give your reasons. [21]

Hi

dumi

,
thanks,

i add a sentence:

Nowadays, finding a good position is always a big challenge around the world. People are struggling with their resume.
The issue of whether social skills play as vital role as good qualifications is of great concern to many people when they are looking for a job. In my point of view, although the qualification is one of the significant conditions, social skills are indispensable part of job seeking.

duo008   
Apr 1, 2014
Writing Feedback / Advantages outweigh the disadvantages to starting foreign language early [3]

and, my conclusion style will be like:

In conclusion, despite that fact ... may be beneficial for...., ...are important as well/ ...should not be ignored.
therefore, ...

In conclusion, despite that fact learning a foreign language at primary school may be beneficial for children , there are some disadvantages should not be ignored such as (your examples conclusion or thesis).

So learning a new language at middle school, it seems, is still a good choose. + 1 sentence(I prefer you support both sides, because you can have more ideas to say)...
duo008   
Apr 1, 2014
Writing Feedback / Advantages outweigh the disadvantages to starting foreign language early [3]

Hi crystal,
I think your essay let me get a bit confusion.
you'd better get a particular example to support your thesis.

for example in your first Paragraph, why do you think children are less self-consciousness than adolescents ?

in addition to this,
primary school= elementary school
secondary school = middle school
duo008   
Apr 1, 2014
Writing Feedback / 'dissatisfaction with the house' ; IELTS TASK 1 [14]

We met in your office last week and yesterday I received a letter saying that you have a great position for me.

you don't need this sentence.

Fistof all, the main reason is thatI have been working on a project for many years in a company and I fear that I cannot give that up.

I am working on a project for many years in company, and I'm afraid I cannot...

Moreover, In addition, I would like to recommend another expert to you,

moreover/in addition , just use one of them, it will be OK.

, who is rather professional in carrying out new IT project.

this sentence is not make sense.

if you call me to inquire anything about this person.

here ask will be better,
if you want to know the details about this person, plz feel free to call me

I think you can write down the letter in your own language and then translate to English, it is more easier to understand what you want to say
duo008   
Apr 1, 2014
Writing Feedback / 'dissatisfaction with the house' ; IELTS TASK 1 [14]

Dear Mr. Robert
I am very happy to receive your letter offering me such a great job opportunity. It is really a pleasure to me. Unfortunately, after think a while, I regret to tell you that I cannot take this job due to some family concerns.

As you know, I am working in my father's wood company as a manager. My job in there is pretty easy and boring, that's why I want to change my job to get different experiences to enrich myself. But my father has been diagnosed with serious heart disease last week. Therefore, I have to take the responsible to take care of my father's company.

I am so sorry about that. However, I want to recommend one of my friends Peter Smith to take this position. He has worked in my father's company for 5 years. He is really smart and talented man I have ever seen. I can guarantee that he is a responsible and experienced person in company. In some professional aspects he is even better than me.

Thank you again, and hope you can find a right person soon!

Yours Sincerely,
duo008   
Mar 31, 2014
Letters / IELTS test: newspaper letter - "best neighbor in the area" competition. [8]

you are writing for a letter to recommend your neighbor not your tutor or teacher.

you should focus on what he did to prove he is a good neighbor not a good teacher.

like he helped a very old lady cross the road, or helped someone to find her cat or dog, or he did some good things for the community.
duo008   
Mar 31, 2014
Writing Feedback / 'dissatisfaction with the house' ; IELTS TASK 1 [14]

Dear Sir or Madam,
I am writing to express my dissatisfaction with the house decoration that you have completed last week.

I am the owner of the house at 88 Hill Street. The poor quality decoration makes me very disappointed. Firstly/First of all, one of the new door in the living room is very low-quality and the door's handle has been broken somehow, which makes me difficult to get into the room. In addition to this, the colors of the walls in my house are totally not matching the colors that I've decided in the initial plan.

I have already discussed these problems with one of staff - Mr Robert in your company by phone. But he was very rude and told me he can do nothing about it.

Unless you replace the door handle and repaint all the walls as I saw in the initial plan, I will be forced to take a legal action

Your earliest response would be highly appreciated.

Yours Sincerely,
Shigang Xing.
=====================================
a lot of grammar mistakes here
reword some sentences,
hope can help u
duo008   
Mar 31, 2014
Writing Feedback / IELTS - Is social skill as important as good qualification? give your reasons. [21]

The issue of whether social skills play as vital role as good qualifications when you looking for a job is of great concern to many people. In my point of view, although the qualification is one of the significant conditions, social skills are indispensable part of job seeking.

It is undoubted that people who having good qualifications can find a satisfied position. Obviously, employer prefers to choose a person who graduated from Harvard University rather than hire someone just took a short term in TAFE. Because these qualifications can prove you have solid knowledge and ability to take over the job well. By contrast, even if you are really good at sociable, without competent qualification you still cannot find a job.

However, the significance of social skills should be neglected, especially when you are seeking for a management position. Because it is about how you can coordinate people in company. Rapid response ability, decent communication skill and good organizing ability are fairly important in your work environment. Because work sometime is not only related to professional knowledge, but also deal with interpersonal relationship. Person who has these kinds of skills can handle business cases more efficiently and smoothly. But lack of those kind of skills may cause contradiction among colleagues, enhanced, injure the interests of companies.

In conclusion, despite the fact good qualification is the key fact to decide whether you can find a job or not, from the perspective of employers social skills do enjoy the equal role. Therefore, they are both important to us.
duo008   
Nov 30, 2013
Writing Feedback / IELTS: The wealth gap between 1st world countries and 3rd world countries [4]

It is my belief that the solutions for decreasing wealth gap are the responsibility of 1st world countries, because of historical causes. Therefore, I feel that developed countries should assist poorly developed states in all respects.

you didn't give a solution,
because of historical causes, give a example?

I think you can say, the gay between 1st and 3rd world countries because:
1. population
2.culture
3. politics
4.technology

First of all, rich countries should not forget about their aims, videlicet they should help developing countries unselfishly.

why rich countries should help poor countries? It's really confuse me. because you did't have any particularly examples to explain your opinion.
duo008   
Nov 29, 2013
Writing Feedback / IELTS (Academic)Task 2- Responsibility to pay for the cost of road development [16]

Hi dumi,
according your suggestion,I try to write the introduction part, please give me some advices/ feedback, thank you!


As usage of cars is increasing day by day, who should pay for road maintenance? government or car owners? In my opinion, both of them should take responsibility for maintain the road systems as they all get benefits for the road system.