Writing Feedback / Leisure time: spend it outdoors or indoors? [8]

Some people prefer to spend their free time outdoors. Other people prefer to spend their leisure time indoors. Would you prefer to be outside or would you prefer to be inside for your leisure activities?

Leisure Time

Everyone has his or her personal reasons behind spending his or her free time indoors or outdoors. Many people prefer to spend their spare time indoors. Maybe it allows them to relax, watch TV or enjoy their time with the family. I personally prefer to spend my leisure time outdoors because it enables me to get more chances to meet new people and to decrease the stress of my life.

Spending our spare time outdoors gives us many opportunities to expand our relationships. It allows us to meet new people, get new perspectives, and new experiences. For instance, in my spare time I am used to going to a club which is near to my home to enjoy the companion of acquaintances. Furthermore, I have met a lot of people who became my close friends later. Also, I have gotten my recently job from people that I've met at that club.

Besides, spending our time outside helps us to reduce our stress that we face during the week. It is common these days for friends to hang out together to have fun, play, and tell jokes. For example, last weekend, I went with my friends to a night club where we danced and sang till midnight. Once I got home, I really felt refreshed and energized. So going outside can help you change the atmosphere and enjoy the excitements of natural around you.

To summarize, people are divided into two categories regarding whether they spend their time inside or outside their homes. In my opinion, you can stay home and enjoy your time with your family, read a book, or watch TV. However, to go outside and breathe new air helps you to refresh your thoughts and soul. Also, it helps you to energize yourself to move on to the next week.

Please I am a new member here and I need your Comments professors in my writing? I need to know my problems to improve them?

Writing Feedback / Some students prefer to study alone - TOEFL Question [9]

Some students prefer to study alone. Others prefer to study with a group of students. Which do you prefer? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer?

Study Methods

Everyone has their method to success in life. At school or university, success depends on how we study. Some students benefit a lot when they study with groups. Yet, I prefer to study individually because it helps me to concentrate more, and it helps me to build my personality.

Studying alone helps us to focus more in our lessons. For instance, I am a type of person who cannot comprehend my subjects unless I am alone. I can prepare my schedules, guidelines, exercises and go over them all. Moreover, we have a lot of subjects which require us to sit and study alone such as math, reading, and drawing. In my opinion, I can take advantage of every minute without wasting by studying alone.

Additionally, we are building our personalities when we study alone. For example, answering our homework alone encourages us to be more responsible and independent. Also, it motivates us to be accurate in our work in the future. Personally, when I fix my study plan with a specific time and finish it on time, it improves my ability in the future to become more precise and careful.

To conclude, there are many ways to study and it is our right to choose which is suitable for our characters whether alone or with group. In fact, I agree with the idea of studying a lone since it helps me to focus more and establish my personality. Success needs us to work hard and sacrifice more whether we choose to study alone or with group.

Writing Feedback / gaining knowledge/ More job opportunities; Reasons behind attending universities [6]

This is my essay. :)

According to the Longman dictionary, the word university means "an educational institution at the highest level, where you study for a degree". In fact, universities differ in many aspects such as educational level, an academic things, and good curricula. Also, our objectives to attend universities differ from person to person. Moreover, the majority of us attend university for two main reasons which are increasing knowledge and getting more chances for jobs in the future.

Many people enter universities to get more information and knowledge in fields we enroll for. Universities are considered as an important source of learning. For instance, because of professors in the universities are well-educated, well-certified and sophisticated. They are considered as a direct source of information from which students can contact and interact with to gain information. Moreover, libraries at the universities are deemed one of most important references for students to get knowledge related to their studying. For example, Libraries contain many references such as books, past papers, researches, articles, and CDs that facilitate research for students.

Beside, one of the main important reasons for attending universities is to get more opportunity for jobs. Nowadays, everything has developed which forces people to improve themselves according to this. For instance, in the past, it was acceptable for an institution to hire an employee who has no knowledge of computers, whereas, nowadays, it is very difficult for an organization to admit an employee who doesn't have at least ICDL certificate even if his job is not related to the computer. Actually the more approved certificates you have the more chances you have for a good job with high salary.

In conclusion, gaining knowledge and having more chances for jobs in the future are considered the basic goals for people to attend universities. In my opinion, to have a certificate from an approval university is not as important as having knowledge and information in your mind. Furthermore, to have information in our minds without using it is a big loss so that when we study something at university, we have to benefit other people by using it.

Writing Feedback / Classmates vs parents; 'Teaching is the exalted duty than anyone could take' [2]

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement classmates are a more important influence than parents on child's success in school?

Teaching is the exalted duty than anyone could take. Teaching could be in many places such as at school, university, or even at home. Furthermore, parents exert a lot of efforts to teach and explain things to their children during school periods. However, I disagree with the idea that parents could be the only teacher for their kids because parents can teach their children many things but classmates are more influence on children.

Classmates are more influence on children more than parents. Nowadays, children spend a long hours at their schools or university. Accordingly, they spend that time with their classmates playing, discussing, reading, studying together and exchanging their point of views. For instance, when I was at university, I used to share my experiences and ideas with my classmates. Each one of us is with the same age and came from different places around the country so each one of us has his own customs or tradition. When I was at school, my friends and I used to support and encourage each other. Thus by this different mixture of people I learnt a lot from them. Moreover, I used to accept advices from others more than my parents because I feel like I choose them to be my friends not the life force me to accept them.

In conclusion, children get affected from their classmates more than their parents. In my opinion, we have to give the right to our children to choose their friends but we have to pay more attention to them if they get the good things or bad things from them.

Writing Feedback / TOEFL- Violent Media [6]

According to Longman dictionary, the word media means" all the organizations, such as television, radio, and newspapers that provide news and information for the public". Actually media has strong effect in our life; short-term and long-term. People welcome the good effect of media in our life which represented by changing a bad habit to the better or improving a skill according to reading a beneficial article that impact us. However, media has strong bad side effect in people especially children. Media affects our children to become less sensitive to the pain of others at the same time become more aggressive towards others.

Media affect children's personalities to become less sensitive to the suffering of others. Especially, playing games over computer and Internet or watching violent movies via television lead children to be less sensitive. For Instance, children fond in playing war games those ask them to kill a lot of people to be the leader or the king and win the game. Accordingly, you will find them point their guns left and right and shoot around to collect the highest rate of corpse to win the game. If we think deeply of this bloody scene, we will find by this way it prepare them to become cold-hearted towards their victims. Consequently, children become less sensitive toward his sister or brother when he plays with them. Furthermore, he begins getting used to see bloody scenes day by day that may let to a disaster in the future.

Besides, media can provoke children to be more aggressive or hostile towards others. A lot of researches have asserted that children who watch media violence are likely to have increased feelings of offensive and have decreased feelings of sympathy. Many crimes that have committed by children or teenage caused by their willing to imitate to what they have watched in movies or played in games. For example, Michael Carneal, from Kentucky, who in 1997 shot and killed three of his classmates. He was one of war games fanatic. According to the researches also, children after their playing or watching, they like to imitate this at home with their family or at school with their friends that most of the time end to a catastrophe.

To sum up, media influence children's behavior strongly that result in becoming less sensitive and aggressive. In my opinion, media has a strong impact on children so we have to use it properly to raise our children to be successful people in future not to destroy them. Moreover, Children are a valuable thing we could have in this life so we have to pay more attention to what they watch.

Writing Feedback / It is a paragraph, Are Zoos morally wrong? [10]

It is a paragraph ...)

A zoo is a place where animals and birds are kept for exhibition. In the zoo, we can watch in details the life of each animal or bird. Plus, we can find and recognize some rare species of birds such as the red cardinal, and we can watch some endangered animals such as the panda. Many people disagree with the idea of zoos and they think it is morally wrong. Yet, I believe zoos are not morally wrong as some people think, because we can learn many things from zoos, and I consider a zoo as a convenient place to take care of animals.

Animals in the zoo are considered as a sample of education for children. For instance, when children go to the zoo and see how the animal live, they will not forget them. They are going to learn how they live, what they eat, and how they interact with each other. Also, many attributes can be learnt from animals in the zoo. We can learn about corporation from bees, and affection from watching the way the mothers of baboons act towards their babies. In addition, it improves the sense of our responsibilities towards animals. When we decide to preserve an animal, we are going to treat it properly because we have noticed that in the zoo.

Besides, since there are many extinct animals which need more attention and care to stay alive and live peacefully, zoos are the proper places to take care of them. Zoos are the only place where we can protect endangered species. For example, the panda is an endangered species which could have been in a bad situation if the zoologists had not taken care of them. Needless to say, that many animals have been found wounded or injured in the wild then had the opportunity to be cared for and brought back to health and were able to live again because of the professional and specialist care they received in the zoo.

In brief, zoos are places where we can learn something from as well as a suitable place to take care of animals. In my opinion, zoos are a very important place which represents the natural world. Zoos not only awaken the sense of curiosity in our personalities but also give us the opportunity to preserve the animals left in the world.

Essays / What is the more important natural or nurture [7]

I have asked to write about this
"What is the more important natural or nurture???"
Actually I have no idea about both sides...What should I do? or who has information could help me with outlines? :(

Writing Feedback / My Friends - a Challenging Paragraph [7]

Hi

The teacher asked us to write a paragraph which contains these words
(Inclination, animosity, obscure, obliterate, low-key, intrepid, befuddled, befuddled, approbation, arbitrate, personify)

Here is my paragraph please check it if I use the proper meaning of the words

My Friends

Last summer, I spent my vacation with three friends. They have different personalities. Each one of them had an inclination to do things they thought were right. My first friend was Tony. He was totally confused and preferred to stay/ remain a low-key all the time. For instance, when we wanted to go out and have fun outside, he always turned us down. Actually, that type of personality affected him badly because he got no sympathy with people around him. Accordingly, the community around him always befuddled him. The second personality was George who is a personification of misogynistic. In fact, he hated women too much, and he could not obliterate a bad experience in the past from his memory. The last character was Ryan who was sociable and intrepid. For example, when there was a quarrel, usually for obscure reasons, between two people, he liked to act as an arbitrator to get them back together and get rid of the animosity between them so they reconcile their differences. Also, he was always treated by others with great approbation due to his achievements in life. In brief, spending my vacation with different types of personalities was really exciting for me. I got to learn about difference personalities and how to behave with them.

Writing Feedback / If Exceed's walls could talk, what would they tell? [3]

The teacher asked us to write a paragraph about Exceeds' walls (Exceed is an institute name) if they could talk, what would they tell?

Here is my Paragraph....>

They are solid, strong, and tough; however, they can watch every single thing. Have you thought if Exceeds 'walls could talk, what they would tell. They would reveal a lot of mistakes that have been committed by the teachers towards students. First of all, Exceeds' walls would shout and tell about the oppression of Exceeds' teachers towards students. For instance, many teachers compliment students and give them more than they deserve although they do nothing on the exams. Sometimes, teachers know students personally or they know his or her father so they attempt to be generous with them in grading. Moreover, Exceeds' wall would expose the teacher's names that focus on a number of students from the first day and ignore the rest of students for obscure goals. Teachers give them everything such as attention, scores, and approbation. Meanwhile, they forget the rest of the class that came and pay to get the same treatment from the teachers. Furthermore, another part of teachers play during the term then at the end week, they recall that they have curricula they should work on. There are certain teachers who waste student's time with silly games or talks as well as pay no attention to the course. Accordingly, in the last week, they wake up and sum up everything in that week. Lastly, that is right Exceed's motto is "we care" but if Exceeds' walls could talk, they would say "care is not an act but a habit"

Writing Feedback / My (woman's) Weekend -TOEFL [4]

My Weekend

In the weekend, people have a chance to enjoy their times whether outdoors or indoors. They can do their favorite activities, go in a trip, and spend their times with friends. In my country, the weekend is different especially for woman. Woman can not enjoy their times outdoors for there are not many suitable places for woman to have fun and change the atmosphere outside. Thus, many women prefer spending their times indoors, and I am one of them. I spent my weekend, which is Thursday and Friday, at home between doing household chores and working via Internet.

As any working woman, I have no other chance to do the household chores except the weekend. At the morning, I wake late, and I start my cleaning journey. I start with rooms; I sweep them all, mop the floors, and polish the furniture. Next, I pick up the dirty clothes and wash them by the washing machine, then hung up the clean clothes. Although the life improves, household chores remain the same.

Besides, afternoon, I start my shift as adviser via Internet in one of the virtual English schools in Second Life program. My shift is from two to four hours. I sit in the welcome area of Language Lab, English City, I welcome people who show up in the area, and my duty is to explain everything to them. I have to tell them what the target of our school is, how to get benefit from our school, and how to subscribe in our school and be one of Language lab, English city, students.

To sum up, even in weekend there is a job I have to do whether a household chores or working as adviser via Internet. I believe in my country, it is too hard for woman to enjoy their times outdoors due to the scarcity of parks for women as well as the restrictions from the community towards women to go outdoors alone. So there are no other choices for women to have except spending time indoors beside Internet.

Please Check my writing and tell me what score could I get??

Writing Feedback / Guns Control or Not? - Essay with one body Paragraph [3]

Please check it for me and how can I get in that essay?? Thank you!!!

According to our constitution, every citizen has the right to protect himself whether with guns, knives or any other tools. However, when we hear the word gun, we recall many crimes have been committed by people with that tool. In my country, guns spread all over the country in excuse of they are one of our customs. Although the idea of banning guns is too difficult to be accepted in my society, I think the government should ban guns among the entire citizens all over the country for guns aid in the society's damage.

Guns and firearms assist the society to destroy itself. There are many crimes have been committed inside homes by one of the family members by mistake. For instance, Mohammed killed his sister when he was 20 years by mistake when he was trying to frighten her by his gun. He shot her in the head while she was cooking in the kitchen. Furthermore, Because of the easiest way of obtaining guns in my country especially at homes, there are several crimes relating to suicide have been perpetrated. Also, people use guns in many trifles conflicts. For example, according to the eyewitness, the driver killed the passenger because he did not give him 20 YR. Moreover, banning guns in Yemen is going to decrease the revenge problem which considers one of Yemen's problems.

To sum up, guns crimes consider one of Yemen's problems that destroy the society, and I strongly believe that banning guns is going to help people to rebuild the society properly. So in my opinion, the government should think seriously of putting strict laws of prohibiting guns to public and put very severe punishments to which they break those laws.