Writing Feedback / (IELTS) Some educationalists think that international exchange visit will benefit teenagers [4]

Some educationalists think that international exchange visit will benefit teenagers at the school.

To what extent do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Some educationalists believe that teenagers will get benefits from taking part in international exchange visit. Even though there are some drawbacks when moving abroad in exchanging programs, the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.

On the one hand, traveling and staying in other countries will bring some drawbacks when the youth have an exchange visit. There are culture shocks that might affect the quality of the journey if the exchange nation has so different and strange rules in the regular activities or costumes. Weather can also be a problem for those who live in a tropical area to a cooler place.

However, there are more benefits that teenagers can get when attending an exchange visit. One advantage is the ability to have self-development that is necessary for the youth. When teenagers live far from their home country and meet new people in a different environment, they will have a chance to develop their interpersonal skills, problem-solving skills and independent opinions. Furthermore, gaining new knowledge and understanding the culture of another nation is a plus that they cannot learn and really know in their schools. To encourage the youth to take part in these exchange visits, there are many organizations running for this purpose such as AFS Intercultural Programs and AIESEC that focus on developing necessary skills and experiences.

In conclusion, despite some disadvantages when teenagers attend international exchange visits, it is still a good chance for them to develop important skills which are needful for their future and to learn new things. Governments should support these kind of learning to bring back the best results in education.

Writing Feedback / IELTS: Globalization has both advantages (economy) and disadvantages (diseases) [4]

Globalization has both advantages and disadvantages.

Discuss both and give your opinion.

In the society with advanced technology, the world becomes closer and globalization brings many benefits in the economy and other fields, but also some drawbacks. In my opinion, I believe globalization has its own disadvantages besides its advantages, but globalization is the key to developing the international economy and improving the quality of life for people worldwide.

One economic benefit to having globalization is that it would give more opportunities for trading. Free trade makes the world smaller, which means there are more exchanging goods between countries. In other words, the global market will be more flourishing and competitive, which is beneficial for the customers to have lower costs of products. Another advantage is that there is the spread of technology and innovation which is a good chance for local companies to access brand new technology from all over the world, so there are more job opportunities.

On the other hand, there are some obvious disadvantages from globalization. Firstly, in an open market today, people are easily vulnerable to infectious diseases that can affect numerous people in a short time. Secondly, growing society based on globalization negatively impacts the environment when people destroy forests because of the need for more spaces for manufacturing and housing. Transport systems and goods production lead to air and water pollution. Lastly, the job market will be more competitive that may cause losing local jobs and more people will be unemployed if they stop learning and catching up with the world.

In conclusion, globalization has both its benefits and challenges in the long run. Except from the drawbacks of globalization, I think globalization is a necessary step for international economic development and better life quality for people.

Writing Feedback / Getting promotion is one of the biggest drives for people - factors which lead people to work hard [4]

Here is my essay. Can you give me some feedback and possible score I may get. Thank you!

influencing people to do their best at work

Getting promotion is one of the biggest drives for people to apply themselves and work hard in the modern workplace.
Why do you think people are so driven to get promotion?
What other factors influence people to work hard?

In the modern workplace, people are hard-working and make a great deal of effort to take promotion opportunities. There are some main reasons why they attempt to get the higher positions. However, there are also other elements that make them so energetic in their working.

People try their best to step up the ladder because of some obvious reasons. Job security is one of the advantages in a higher position that they are less likely fired when companies need to reduce the workforce. Besides, they have the power in making decisions and managing the tasks and staff which means they can arrange their own schedule and have more freedom. Promotion also provides higher payments, bonuses and other benefits such as private business trips in company's jets and access to some luxury places that they cannot have in the lower positions.

There are other factors affecting the hard-working level of people in this era. When people find out the career they love, they tend to have high performance because that job is their passion and doing it makes them feel happy and fulfilled. Moreover, some companies know the method to motivate their staff to work hard through recognition and celebration success. In other words, people will receive monetary incentives and other rewards when performing effectively in their work which helps them feel appreciated and valued.

In conclusion, nowadays people work hard and strive to gain promotion owing to some key reasons and also other factors. Getting a higher position gives them opportunities to have job security, power in decision-making and better salaries with other benefits. Their passion in the job and motivation in success can also encourage them to dedicate to the jobs.

Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK 2: Causes and solutions for global warming [4]

Global warming is one of the biggest threats to our environment.

What causes global warming?
What solutions are there to this problem?

The environment is affected by many reasons and one of them is global warming. Humans activities release a large amount of carbon that creates the greenhouse situation which leads to global warming. This problem can be solved by the governments and individuals.

Greenhouse is the main cause of global warming in this era. There are many activities of humans that cause this problem. Transport is the major carbon emission, particularly in urban areas where people's need for moving is high and they rather choose their private vehicles because it is more convenient. For example, each Vietnamese may have one scooter to use as an everyday vehicle when they attend universities or start working. Furthermore, industrial activities also contribute to the amount of carbon in the atmosphere when there are more and more plants constructed.

However, there are solutions for this issue. Governments can introduce more strict laws and regulations in activities and production that may be harmful for the environment. This will prevent companies and organizations from doing activities that are not good for nature and they may have more careful decisions. Moreover, people can make their own campaign to raise awareness of society in using public transport instead of using their private vehicle. This may decrease the needs of private vehicles which helps the global warming problem be solved in the long run.

In conclusion, global warming is the most concerning issue nowadays caused by the greenhouse situation from human activities. However, this issue can be tackled if governments and individuals are responsible and take actions to change.

Writing Feedback / IELTS: Fast food should not be allowed to advertise - all companies have the right to advertise [2]

Many people think that fast food companies should not be allowed to advertise while others believe that all companies should have the right to advertise.

What is your opinion?

In this day and age, advertising is the key method to do business. Some people think that junk food advertising should be banned, while others believe that all companies can advertise freely. In my opinion, all companies and organizations have the right to make adverts for their products because of the open market and the right for the customers to choose the products they want.

Nowadays, open trade gives all countries as well as international and local companies more opportunities to do business. Globalization creates this convenient market as an inevitable result. The business have their own right to promote their products to make profits. In other words, advertising not only helps the companies earn more money, it also helps companies' employees and other contributors such as models or video makers make ends meet. Besides, fast food advertising can make the advertisement market more varied and give more choices for clients.

It is legal for people to access all of the products that are available in the market. Customers should have the chance to see all products so that they can find the suitable ones for them. Advertisement is the bridge between sellers and buyers to support their demands. Even though junk food is not healthy for people if they overly consume this kind of food, it is still their own choice to decide which product they want.

In conclusion, though some people consider advertising about junk food should not be permitted in society, others think that each company has the right to make advertisements for their products. I think all companies should be able to connect with clients through adverts owing to the globalization market nowadays and the right of the customers to reach a wide range of goods.