Writing Feedback / Of all the mentioned five countries, Turkey had the highest spending in food, drinks and tobacco [8]

Very good English and very thoughtful arguments have been given by you.

-However, in the introductory paragraph, do write a theme sentence stating which argument are you supporting.

-Conclusion is a little short. Maybe you should merge the last two paragraphs and shuffle lines to make a good conclusion without changing the word count.

The last line of your 2nd last paragraph ( only training or only talent....)- make it the last line of ur essay - its a lovely and very effective line.

- I cant rate your essay as am not a professional and no one here can give you an exact band score. But I think your essay is no less than 6.5 band score but dont think it as a real score as I am not an expert. When I gave my Ielts, I wrote a worse essay than this but still got 6.5 in writing section.

-Btw Seth M R Jaipuria is a famous school in lko so I think u will not have any problem in English my friend.

Gud luck ncheers

Writing Feedback / GLOBALIZATION: Differences between nations are becoming less and less evident. [29]

I dont consider any religions inferior- I bow my head in front of ALLAH with the same respect as i bow infront of Jesus or any Hindu god n even the sikh gods too- coZ as a human i believe we shud acknowledge blessings from all.

-Why i mentioned Middle east? few days back in Times of India newspaper- I read that a woman journalist was jailed in Iran as she wanted to cover the Women's Football World Cup final. I always condemn any rude behaviour against female-Coz I live in a modern world and I believe that a woman should be given the due respect and the equality as males. You can count numerous judgments against women rights and. human rights related to middle eastern countries. I hate hypocrites .

-I dont consider any culture as inferior or superior. Science is enough to demolish all foolish blind beliefs. My ideal is APJ Abdul Kalam- former president of India-A great scientist - and above all a down to earth human...n as a matter of fact he is a Muslim but I love n respect him more than any damn Hindu leader---Its not the religion caste or color which should separate us-It shud b our attitude which will cause rift.

-By Middle East I solely meant a geographical area- as u will say India is in South-asia.

Writing Feedback / Of all the mentioned five countries, Turkey had the highest spending in food, drinks and tobacco [8]

Google traslator is not an accurate translator and I have consulted many people from Estonia, Russia, Denmark etc who say that one should not blindly believe google translator as they always find error in translation.

- SWEDES is an ethnic group in Sweden . Maybe Sweden citizens are called as "swedes" but I feel Swedish is more common.

-AND I WOULD like to advise you Mr. Xin that you should not post futile messages like "message posted" on other student's threads , for the sake of generating your thread,as it serves no purpose and is certainly in violation of the rules of this website.DO READ THE MASTER RULE.

Writing Feedback / Of all the mentioned five countries, Turkey had the highest spending in food, drinks and tobacco [8]

Its Swedish n not "swedes".

- u have written this task in a good way. However in conclusion u can also write that the countries r spending more on food n lesser on education which shows that people's top prority are food n clothing.

- u shud write a generalised conclusion based on given facts, it will show ur clarity of understanding.

- I would like to c how u write Task 2 essays as they r more important than task 1.

Good luck n cheers

Writing Feedback / GLOBALIZATION: Differences between nations are becoming less and less evident. [29]

Ok let me give u some facts--
1. Men suits- originated in early eighteetn century during Victorian era from the Britishers.
2.Jeans- is derived from word Genoa which was a clothing worn by sailors of genoa and later it became as jeans for rugged use.
3.Denims- derive from frnch word "serge de Nimes" was produced in late 16th century in France.

4.T shirts- these originated in USA carved from under-clothings , and was specifically designed for US soldiers ,marines etc and later during the great depression it was the cheapest n most common clothing worn by whole europe and america.

5-Bikini- the modern bikini was invented by French engineer Louis Reard in 1946

6-LINGERIE-Lingerie is derived from French word "Linge" and its dated as back as 3000BC worn in Egypt(documented proofs r available).

Now my friend if you see all above facts- USA invented only T shirt while all fashionable clothings were invented in France . u shud rectify urself n clear ur misunderstanding-USA does not propagates fashion in the world neither does it thrust it on anyone. Moreover France is considerd fashion capital of the world not USA-French gals r really cute -- hahahaha..

- u r in 21st century not 11th century. People dont wanna live as Nomads ...people wanna eat a pizza but cnt endure a gal wearing bikini-people wanna wear Tux but cant endure public kissing---Its all hypocrisy--if one wants to b modern, they shud accept modernization else if they wanna live in hyper control regimes-they shud go to middle east- there r plenty of countries who follow ruthless core traditions over there.

Writing Feedback / GLOBALIZATION: Differences between nations are becoming less and less evident. [29]

Disappearing of an old culture for the betterment of technology,society and lifestyle is not a bad thing at all. Festivals dont include that, however if ancestors followed some blind faith tradition because of lack of educational awakening or available scientific proofs, then its the duty of the young generation to NOT follow it.

- Besides Kevin's color of paints is a great example as I think that this is what USA and India both are- an mixture of so many cultures. Do give one example where a good cultural tradition was lost due to USA dominance??

-In India people in earlier times used to wear dhoti- kurtas but due to the influence of the Britishers, it all changed and people started wearing shirt, pants ,suits etc. coz they were more comfortable and easy to wear. If some other nation has something good , then there is nothing wrong in absorbing it. If u think that you have lost a culture by wearing western clothes then you should not wear it and also suggest your peers. Initiate first and suggest later.

Writing Feedback / GLOBALIZATION: Differences between nations are becoming less and less evident. [29]

There are a lot of things people should not do in front of parents. USA is the most dominant country in this world and it is not its fault that others are trying to ape it.

-Moreover as I have repeatedly said- go and see some European movies too.

-Besides as far as I think usa directors are not craving for others to watch it. It is your will to watch it or not.

-Besides we all are independent beings n can think what we like .

Good luck n adios.

Writing Feedback / Important truths are outrageous when they begin; GRE ISSUE TOPIC [4]

Hi Bimala,
You have written a very good essay and the facts/arguments/examples you have given really reflect your clarity about this topic.
However I would advise you to break down your essay in one or two more paragraphs. It might make it look more cool and also easier to read..

this thread might interest you on RELIGION V/S SCIENCE topic
Existence of the supernatural? Essay wrote on watching "The exorcism of Emily Rose"

good luck and cheers.

Writing Feedback / ILETS essay. Becoming difficult to escape from media. [4]


Alisha, no one else other than a professional IELTS examiner would be able to exactly grade your essay because their criteria is based as:
4-POINT CRITIQUE
--->TASK ACHIEVEMENT
--->LEXICAL RESOURCE
--->COHERENCE AND COHESION
--->GRAMMATICAL RANGE AND ACCURACY

I will give you a name of a guy who will professional rate your essay...however he rates only one essay for free and the rest you will have to pay for... I had sent him my final essay which I wrote in the IELTS exam and he rated it accurately...so maybe you can try him.

His name is Miracel.

hope it will help you...

good luck and cheers

Writing Feedback / GLOBALIZATION: Differences between nations are becoming less and less evident. [29]


U r right Ismail in saying that...the world is surely moving to one culture n those who r against modernization are still indulged in controlling women, n abusing human rights...


How can you blaim this all on just one country? USA is at the pinnacle of success in most of the fields, is that why it should it be blamed? USA is a great country where people from all countries/color/creed/ethnicity/religion live together and they all have their own cultures and they do follow it over there too. One's culture is for him to follow, not for others. Moreover, if you have ever talked to any European, you will know that their culture is even more open than the American culture. This transformation in the culture is coming as a result of technological advancement and education . I live in India, and India has experienced major cultural transition in last few decades and there is nothing to blame on USA for that. Have you ever felt why is the whole world moving towards western culture??? Its because countries in the west are more open & less hypocrites, they guarantee their citizens all the human rights , all the freedom and all the fun everyone should have. Every culture has their own good and bad aspects.and their is no definition of good/bad. What you consider as bad, I might consider as good. The rule above all rules which I follow is that no culture is superior or inferior- I don't believe in sweating bullets over religion or culture. This world is a big place and one should enjoy the diversity and fun it has to offer and not look down upon countries/culture/people.

Writing Feedback / GLOBALIZATION: Differences between nations are becoming less and less evident. [29]

All such movie come under Adult category--- n shit is everyewhere ---- it shud b the parents , n guardians who shud monitor kids--- besides usa is not the centre of this thing---- besides internet provides all such vulgarity to children easily my frnd--- as u can see China which allows only selected 20 foreign movies per year- so in similar way if the govt of that country doesnt want its people to see such things-it shud ban it..

--dont blame any particular country fr such things, what substantial proof can u give that usa started it? or if usa is responsible for promoting vulgar movies which children watch? do tell me which research or study showed this fact?

in fact i have once read in a newspaper that according to a survey, pakistanis surf pornographic content the most in the world..

-stop thinking anti-USA n think globally my frnd

Writing Feedback / GLOBALIZATION: Differences between nations are becoming less and less evident. [29]

It depends on the society n the reformation --- if western countries have an open mindset towards these things then its not a bad thing---- there r many countries in the world which even bans women from watching football matches ?y? coz guys in football matches wear shorts--- hahaaha isnt that being tooo narrow minded? i dont think american pie was a bad movie at all-- in fact i loved it--- coz i think of it as humour n not vulgarity--- it all depends on anyone's perspective my friend.

Writing Feedback / GLOBALIZATION: Differences between nations are becoming less and less evident. [29]

-->


hahaahhahah u have cracked me up with this line...my friend Globalisation is such a vast phenomenon that u can't even streamline it to only sex and y r u blaming USA so much in this essay?? lol... USA didnt invent sex my friend, in fact its a great country where sexual freedom is given to its citizens.

---> u have clearly deviated from ur topic - not even a single line has been written by you to show how this so called "globalisation or sex promotion" by the hands of USA (as u have stated repeatedly) was or is responsible for creating rift between nations or bridging the gap between the people.

MAYBE U NEED TO REWRITE THIS ESSAY.

-->Also don't try to be a judge in essay writing...all exams -gre/toefl/ielts strictly never want the student to b judging any particular perspective unless its a worldwide fact...this essay seems related to "sexual promotion by movies" more than related to the above mentioned topic.

---->u also need to revolve ur essay around the points mentioned in the essay question.... "films, fashion, brands and TV channels " are given in the question as IELTS wants u to give ur opinion with respect to these particular points.

---> also read the 5 para approach for argumentative esssays on google.

---> dont lose heart, it used to happen to me also,,,, deviating from a topic is not a major problem, u need to just read the question again n again n write ur arguments based on it,.

GOOD LUCK N CHEERS

QUOTE FOR U:
The greatest pleasure in life is doing what people say you cannot do.

- Walter Bagehot

Writing Feedback / 'positive reinforncement to teach is to praise positive actions, ignore negative ones [3]

Hi there,
you have written a very beautiful essay... the case studies, examples and all other facts u have stated certainly show ur clarity on the above topic.

The intro-main body-conclusion- all hold pretty good arguments as stated by you. However, I would say that u need to emphasize the fact that "ignoring " the negative traits is not a good thing. We all r like a deformed stone, but it is the worldly experience, professional teachings, n the constant focus on us for the improvement of our negative traits that will make us a good human being and a good professional. For example if an individual becomes the greatest athlete in the world, but lacks social manners or indulges in bad acts-then it will eventually result in his/her downfall...

--> I would say that teaching should be based on amplifying the positive traits n totally curbing the negative ones.

hope it helps...

Good luck n cheers.

QUOTE FOR U:
"Never tell me the sky's the limit when there are footprints on the moon "

- Unknown

Writing Feedback / (IELTS) Internet teaching or traditional school? THX~ [4]


-beautiful n very good starting of the essay... great one.


-- this introductory para is just a little less than the desired length as it lacks the "theme sentence". Google what does theme sentence means in the essay, u need it very much in essay-writing else ur essay will be insufficient.

---Those who advocated the new education approach, however, fails (fail) to consider the fact that distinguishing the right from wrong is a tough task for the young. Although a sea of information is provided, it is a pity that most of the information has not been proved by the authority (authorities). Children may misunderstand if lacking of proper guidance given by from professional teachers. In addition, school adopts systematic way to teach children physically and psychologically. Loads of activities are held in order to cultivate the skills in communication and cooperation, which helps students access to society smoothly and gain a promising future as well.


----- rephrase this sentence.

--->My dear friend, firstly this is an argumentative essay, therefore look for the five para approach of essay-writing. You will find it easily on google.

----> Your essay started laying focus on "distance education".. Distance education is a wide field, while Internet learning is merely a part of this wide field.

----> third para of ur essay is the best one i would say...u have stated a lot of good arguments, however in ur whole essay u haven't mentioned what's ur opinion n u agree to which side???

IELTS mostly gives argumentative essays in task 2...so always write at least 5 paragraphs n not less than that...try n keep ur word limit below 325-350 words. (they give minimum 250 words.)

Hope it will help u.

Good luck n cheers.

QUOTE FOR U:

Always be a first-rate version of yourself, instead of a second-rate version of somebody else.

- Judy Garland

Writing Feedback / IELTS - 'infrastructure' - How to solve growing traffic and pollution problems [7]

Hello Isabella,
- u r rite in saying that ur arguments are not very strong... lemme give u some arguments to mention:
-> firstly u can write that escalating the price of fuel will indirectly increase the price of essential commodities, increase the inflation rate, which will eventually harm the public -whether they use vehicles or not .

-> pollution control can b done by encouraging use of CNG or electric powered vehicles n making strict standards for vehicles.
-> govt n private industrial companies should also encourage use of bicycles.

try to write these points in ur essay n give a couple of examples.

good luck n cheers

QUOTE FOR U:

Watch your thoughts; they become words.

Watch your words; they become actions.

Watch your actions; they become habits.

Watch your habits; they become character.

Watch your character; it becomes your destiny.

- - Frank Outlaw

Essays / Essay about your favorite festival (Diwali). [3]

Firstly i wud advise u to pen down ur own essay- if u r unable to get any idea then we have the god of the virtual world -Google...

- U can write abt the historical perspective-purpose of celebrating- wen its celebrated- change in traditional ways of celebration- modern day celebration- its advantages to us, n its disadvantages, n then in conclusive para tell y is it ur most fav essay.

hope it helps
gud luck n cheers

Writing Feedback / Free mobile phone and access to the Internet to find jobs sponsored by tax payers? [9]

Dont write "people are selfish..." it sounds u r judging everyone--avoid judging in any exanlm--- use words like " secretive" in this case

-- u have ended ur 2nd last para countering ur view n not giving sufficient explaination as to y ur opinion will have more important advantages than the pqrticular disadvantage--- this is required

-- overall a very gud essay, ur english is good-- keep writing n think more strong arguments

gud luck n cheers

QUOTE FR U
" only in our dreams are we free. The rest of the time we need wages".

-Terry Pratchett

Essays / "To what extent and in what ways do you believe India can alleviate 'Brain Drain'? [16]

The scholarship given by british council is for some of the top scorers in the country----which interview part r u talking abt?

Writing Feedback / Less than half of high school graduates with a diploma. - an essay [6]

I agree with ur last line abt number of open minded parents--- but i think its natural... v might also becme like that one day... parenthood is very tuff, i think it wud b best not to become one ever -as far as i feel- v will get all the freedom, no blame game, no liabilities n most importantly no tension at all....

- btw Ana u have written a great essay--- i hate the education system here too- just cram cram cram n no worldly knowledge- n then alll people around u expect u to crack competitive exams where there is a ratio of 1:300 students for each seat available...

Writing Feedback / Existence of the supernatural? Essay wrote on watching "The exorcism of Emily Rose" [12]


My sweetest frnd, I rarely get offensive/aggressive ever--i wasn't getting aggressive, but i just found Idiocy a cute word...m certainly not calling u an Idiot...u very well know how intelligent i consider u to be...n if Michio Kaku n Discovery Channel is saying wrong, then we kids can't ever do anything... or maybe we dont even know who is saying right or who is saying wrong. As far as things before universe is considered, universe was created from a small explosion ,,,,as small as millionth part of a cm...(again discovery channel source)... n i being an engineer , n wishing to be a researcher, i shud be believing in science, but i consider that wen science fails, God is the one who needs to be sent the SOS.

n dont get annoyed, i dont call names to smart an intelligent people like u...coz i believe that me -u- n we all can learn from each other...btw i can teach u relativistic mechanics (if u wish to) n u cn tell me how to write a novel :D..hahahaha

:D

Writing Feedback / Existence of the supernatural? Essay wrote on watching "The exorcism of Emily Rose" [12]

y cant all people get their vocal chords operated and sing like Bryan Adams or Taylor Swift (well i love these two artists :D) ??? y cant all pregnant women given some medical treatment so that all their kids are as smart/beautiful as -Tom Cruise/Scarlett Johansson???? and as intelligent as our lovely Newton/Einstein???? lol.. it isnt that their brain signal are of varying voltage/Hz...hahahahhaa...

- TEMPLES-MOSQUE-CHURCH-N OTHER SHRINES- they dont mean that God isn't omnipotent...they mean the we all are so narrow minded -incompetent creatures that we fight over land,air,n god when it was never divided when the world was created...

-It is not true that Religion tell u to stop working n believe on god....in the Hindu religious book Bhagwad Gita there is a famous line :

"Karmanye Vadhikaraste Ma Phaleshu Kadachana,
Ma Karma Phala Hetur Bhurmatey Sangostva Akarmani" <----- this quote is for u Ana

(You have a right to perform your prescribed action, but you are not entitled to the fruits of your action. Never consider yourself the cause of the results your activities, and never be associated to not doing your duty)...so my friend don't think i am advocating that God or Spirituality asks us to be complacent and dont do our duty...the Bhagwad Gita also says that it is the effort which is only in our hands and the result is in the hands of god.

--- Ugh, now who wants more explanation as how incompetent our science or our intelligence still is??? science is still in infancy...its still debatable that whether there is a universe or multi-verse... Nostradamus gave so many right predictions in this very world...wasnt that supernatural to foretell the future??? Stephen Hawking believes that in the competition SCIENCE VS Religion ---science will win...however he has lived more than half of his life( 69 yrs old is i think more than half , unless he takes tht invented drug), but still he has not proved the fact due to which blackholes violate physical laws, neither he has been able to explain the evolution of mankind from apes to humans...

According to Reinhold F. Glei, it is settled that the argument of theodicy is from an academic source which is not only not epicurean, but even anti-epicurean. The earliest extant version of this trilemma appears in the writings of the skeptic Sextus Empiricus.( from wikipedia)

Epicurus didn't deny the existence of gods. Instead, he stated that what gods there may be do not concern themselves with us, and thus would not seek to punish us either in this or any other life

-n please I request that this is a healthy debate so I wont welcome any abusive words on my thread at least. n also excuse my wrong spellings or sms language as i m writing all this via cell.

Writing Feedback / Existence of the supernatural? Essay wrote on watching "The exorcism of Emily Rose" [12]

Btw do tell me 4m whr u got those atheist statistics coz whatever i m finding- the range is so varying tht it seems completely false-

mst imp look around urslf- whatever nature hs created is perfect n balanced->life n death, atmosphere,human mind, ozone layer... n nw think what man created which is always imperfect n always destroys the balance->global warming,warheads, pollution etc.----- if the human is so capable n all the natural things occurred thru reactns then y cnt v create a similar reactn n patch up the ozone layer hole? y r v worried abt global warming? its coz whn science becomes incompetent -n it cant explain any phenomenon-it uses terms like "exception".

-btw who said that man isnt trying to re-ignite the spark of life or increase human age- google it my frnd that a group of scientists r already claiming that they r making a drug which will increase the avg human age to 150 yrs..

- yogic science has proved that the word "om" has divine effects on human body-- n this word "om" is the basic word of all religious books of hindus frm ancient times.

- buddhism has not originated frm god- it was King Sidhhartha-later named as Lord Buddha -who preached it.

- i dnt favour totally believing in god or luck n nt doing the effort-- but there is luck-- else if everything is hardwork-then y is there only one Bill Gates/Warren Buffet/Mark Zuckerberg etc-- with due respect to all these people-there might b many much intelligent people working under them - but u r they the best? coz they did the hard work n was graced by good luck n opportunities.

- pls explain to me y 2 students in same circumstances hav different IQ-one is smart n one is foolish-y cant the so called nerve signal be initiated by artificial means to make all of then intelligent?

Writing Feedback / Existence of the supernatural? Essay wrote on watching "The exorcism of Emily Rose" [12]

I m not naming any particular god to be superior.I am supporting the one ultimate god. if considering god as superior is absurd then i think that neglecting him without proving the unexplained shud b term as IDIOCY.

Discovery channel show-How universe works- says that the universe originatd frm a small explosion n the universe expanded faster than speed of light -which by any scientific knowledge isnt possible for a particulate matter.

-Michio Kaku says that accordng 2 big bang- universe was created from a void -zero-> but he contradicts that zero cant create anything.

-He adds that the first physical law which came into existence was Gravitational law-n he says that we all were lucky that the gravitational pull was of optimum magnitude to create universe-SCIENCE IS ITSELF HERE EXPLAINING ITSELF ON LUCK.

-Prof. Lawrence Krauss says that energy created particulate matter when universe's explosion started- but as v know energy cant b created or destroyed- then from where was that input of energy.-science hasnt explained that.

-black holes-very best example to screw all laws of science or known to the incompetent humans who disregard any divine power.

Writing Feedback / Existence of the supernatural? Essay wrote on watching "The exorcism of Emily Rose" [12]

Well Ana if u believe that calling God as superior than us is absurd then i feel that most of the people in this world are absurd and thats y there r shrines,church,temple etc all over the world...

-time is just not a scale to measure duration my frnd... if u look in relativistic mechanics there r four parameters in which any point maybe defined , which r -x,y,z,t--- where t is the time. time is also most useful in explaining distance as we know-light years.

-- n as far as i know Stephen Hawkings or any other super intelligent human has still not clearly explained the origin of the universe or multiverse with substantial proofs... a hypothesis is not a fact, it is just a view of a particular personor group which isnt universally accepted , else it wud b a fact.

- lemme giv u an example- the vedas of the hindu religion had explained numerous postures of yoga even before newton or einstein even came into existence--n there is proof of the yogic science in religious scriptures n engravings on ancient monuments... now if there were so intelligent people in the world before science came into being than y cant b there any god??

Even when Einstein Was asked point blank if he believed in God or not---he replied-"i am not an atheist".

-when the super intelligent Einstein never denied existence of a God then how can we?

- moreover , when a person dies, y cant our scientists ignite the spark of life back into him again?? after all there is no one superior than us... in addition, y hasnt man been able to create a parallel being as intelligent as human n as durable as a human?? was it all complex reaction that millions of living beings came into existence on this earth and adapted to the climatic changes themselves??? if there is no omnipotent god then y do v have a church n temple?

Writing Feedback / How to succeed in learning a foreign languge. [5]

Nobody is perfect my frnd-- v all do n will do mistakes else we wud b called as Superman... v just try here to give variety of opinions which is always useful ...

Writing Feedback / ielts essay - ways of reducing traffic conditions [4]

Hi Sangeetha,
You have written a very good essay and grammatically there are hardly any mistake , as far as I can see. The structure is also good and up to the mark and also the word count is fine too.

However, I would suggest that in this essay you will have more points in disagreeing with the above statement rather than agreeing with it. I would like to tell what anyone can argue against your opinion.

2ND & 3rd PARAGRAPH-can students study via YM/SKYPE/MSN etc??? a school not only teaches a student the academic knowledge but also how to behave, etiquettes, moral science and many other quint-essential ways of life which can't be done at home.

--> can people working in medical services, railways, police,factories avoid using vehicles? in countries where the public transport system isn't highly developed, they will have no option other than using their own vehicles.

--> carpooling only sounds good, but it raises many security concerns which will create another menace for the government to tackle with

in this essay, u can disagree and give points against it, n also suggest a measure thhat the best way for a government to tackle this problem is to control the growth rate of the population, increase the width of road to accomodate increasing problem, encourage the use of smaller n pollution vehicles like electrically operated bicycles etc.

i hope it helps u.

Quote for u:
"Obsessed is just a word the lazy use to describe dedicated. "

Writing Feedback / How to succeed in learning a foreign languge. [5]

Hello Ismail,
I read your first essay- The foreign language one- and i should say that it is a very good essay. You have covered most of the points and ur writing is also of top quality. So u shouldn't worry tooo much about this writing section if u r preparing for exams like IELTS/GRE/TOEFL etc ... i wish u the best of luck, i m running out of time and so i will try and read ur second essay later.

good luck n cheers my friend.

Writing Feedback / Existence of the supernatural? Essay wrote on watching "The exorcism of Emily Rose" [12]

Thanks Ismail, for telling me the phenomenon-phenomena thing. I actually never paid any attention to that,but thanks.

As a matter of fact, people in earlier times have believed in spirits. but has anyone ever proved the existence of any spirit infront of the world??? thats the main question. if they were successful then someone shud hav won the challenges of Mr. Randi n Houdini.--which has not been yet established... n thats y their is a question on this topic...If this was a fact then there would be no atheist in this world..? i hope u get my point..n thats y i havent laid stress on what historians have said on this topic coz there is still no clear proof.

Writing Feedback / IELTS ESSAY - FREEDOM TO EXPRESS IDEAS; '3 Idiots' [6]

Hi Sangeeetha,
u have written a beautiful essay,... reasons r strong n the flow is coherent---- as far as the length fr an ielts exam is concerned,if ur handwriting is small i wud say u can write 325-350 words n if u write big words then u shud limit it around 300-325...

- copy this essay in MS word n check ur word count...

- only the length of this essay is questionable else its a very beautiful essay my frnd.

-@Shahdad- my friend its "lose" n not "loose" in this case...lose is like winning or losing .... n loose is like a tight knot or a loose knot....they have different meanings-

gud luck n cheers

Writing Feedback / TOEFL: Some people like to communicate by email and voice mail. Other face-to-face. [3]

Hi friend,
in ur first para u have mentioned u support the interaction thru telephone n face to face--- these both r contradicting as telephone is again a technology based medium while face to face is real life experience----

u can also write that the virtual world has its limitations n sometimes threats too--- people meet over internet, fall in love n the one day their so called beloved vanishes with their bank balance or they r cheated in some other way ----

people say "eyes say it all" n its true.... technology can advance but can it ever provide the sense of touch?

just add these points if u like them--- maybe it will be cool---

good luck n cheers

Essays / 'Hitler's War' Essay - description of World War II. [3]

andrewburdett.wordpress.com/2010/04/29/was-wwii-hitlers-war-29-april-2 010/
Hi my friend,
do read the above blog which is specifically related to ur essay----as far as i feel -"hitler's war" means that the war was started by hitler-only for the attainment of his personal aims----- which many people have declared was caused by his psychologically abnormal mind----if u read his Mein Kampf-- u wil firstly sympathise with his plight as a kid which led him to b so ruthless--- but there are sme historians who say that it was a book specifically written by him as a propaganda n to win public opinion---- however i dont think u need to go so deep for an essay... n do know that if Mein Kampf is banned in ur country-then do not search for it----- n do mention in ur essay that no matter if hitler suffered in his early days (as he mentioned in books) or whatever the reason was--- there isnt any reason in the world which can justify the butchering of innocents...

its a sensitive topic so i wud say dont write anything in favour of hitler's action--- i hope it helps u---- do read the blog link i gave at the start of this msg...

Writing Feedback / "studying in overseas" - IS IT GOOD TO STUDY ABROAD ? [3]

Hey Sangeetha,
Ana has already made the necessary corrections n u shud feel confident now -as u r writing sme brilliant essays ...u shud get around band 7 if u keep writing this way----however i would like to tell u that in IELTS the scoring sections r reading n listening---but they both require u to b very attentive n concentrated--- just know that u will need to score in L n R is u wanna get a good band score--- so u shud practice them as much as u can--- writing section is surely easy for u---n in speaking they have very selected topics which u can prepare easily-----

a very nice essay btw

good luck n cheers

Essays / CREATIVE WRITING COMPETITION (how to write a good creative essay?) [4]

Hi Sadiya,
firstly u shud start writing on any essay topic n then we all wud b able to evaluate what improvement u can make-if any... besides essay writing is an art n u shud google as many topics as u can n read tonnes of essay--- it will surely help u to widen ur perspective n think beyon the obvious---u need to have ideas first then only u will get to write a great essay... hope it helps --- gud luck n cheers

Faq, Help / Any way to share my essay in private? [11]

No there is no such option- the moderators/contributors or anyone will b able to review ur writings only when it is publicly open for all- this website is not a social networking site where u need privacy... its only for academic benefit n helping the english skills of students... so i really dont think there is any solution to ur problem- its crystal clear over here->public or public only...

Writing Feedback / TOEFL-Smoking should not be promitted in restaurants or other public places [9]

Hahaa Kevin r u feeling gross looking at such a pic?? It happens in India too- the indian govt also passed a law to post a warninng on a major area of a cig pack...i dnt smoke so i m in favour of such gross pics to b pasted on packs..lol... . n i dont think its bad to eat meat... v r up in the food chain n v r infact helping to maintain the natural balance... but yeah if u dont like it-then thats diff... or if u r a memeber of PETA- then forget i my above lines instantly---lol ... :D

Faq, Help / Any way to share my essay in private? [11]

There is a private forum here-but that is only for Contributors n Moderators...This website is for the benefit of students or anyone across the globe-n one can only benefit on this platform by sharing their thots n ideas... if u r shy , then dont be...its a forum for everyone n it will help u also getting ideas from anyone n everyone---if u have any other issue, i think only moderators may help u out- so wait for any moderator to see ur thread n solve ur issue..

gud luck n cheers.

Writing Feedback / USE OF CCTV CAMERAS (IELTS ESSAY) [6]

Hi Sangeetha,
it seems at last u hav figured out how to form the structure of an essay..?? u have written a very beautiful essay over here...as Kevin has said that the tips he has given is for advanced writing- it is very true... u dont need to change much in this essay...

as far as u hav asked about word limit- in Ielts task 2 has a minimum word limit of 250 words... u can write more, but i wud advise u not 2 write more than 350 words under any circumstances.... thatz the max u shud write if u dont wanna piss off the examiner in the firstplace... moreover just fine tune ur conclusion a lil bit... just use some catchy thought or any thought provoking sentence... rest its a perfect essay for IELTS...

good luck and cheers

Essays / "To what extent and in what ways do you believe India can alleviate 'Brain Drain'? [16]

To what extent means u need to project the big picture---- how this brain drain will affect india in the longer run ... thats wat it means ----- n as far as world limit is concerned, thats an art---ART OF OMISSION.... LOL---just remove the lines which dont hav mch impact on ur essay---i hope it helps now