eddies [Contributor]
Feb 1, 2014
Writing Feedback / TOEFL Essay: Some people prefer to take a position in a company and work for the company. [5]
Hi there...,
You are good at writing. I like the way you compose the idea. However, I have a few details to share. Here are they:
... The word "low' here is an adjective which modifies the word "Level". I think you'd better put a hyphen in between low and level. Low-level work
If you put "gain(ed)" here as a verb/ an adjective, then it should be followed by Preposition "from". However, the word of "gain" as a noun will work harmoniously together with in/from/for
... this phrase should be turned into a sentence, so you need to put a subject before will be
I also notice slight problems in spellings and punctuation marks, but overall this writing has showed a good composition :)
Thanks.
Hi there...,
You are good at writing. I like the way you compose the idea. However, I have a few details to share. Here are they:
low level work
... The word "low' here is an adjective which modifies the word "Level". I think you'd better put a hyphen in between low and level. Low-level work
the overall income which is gained in ...
If you put "gain(ed)" here as a verb/ an adjective, then it should be followed by Preposition "from". However, the word of "gain" as a noun will work harmoniously together with in/from/for
Third, will be a business which starts its
... this phrase should be turned into a sentence, so you need to put a subject before will be
I also notice slight problems in spellings and punctuation marks, but overall this writing has showed a good composition :)
Thanks.