Writing Feedback / lot of people migrate to mega cities,reasons and the way to prevent the trend. [10]

hi i am new,i enrolled in IELTS exam.unfortunately,my writings are so poor.so,i would be happy to have your opinion and it would be great if you could score me between 0 to 9.

It has been around forty years since migration to metropolises is the main concern of governments.Experts strongly believe that it is authorities fault and unless this trend do not stop in soon future,it will have very bad impact on peoples economic life.It is,Therefore,government responsibility to control it.Here are some reasons and solutions for this challenge.

High rate of unemployment is playing big role in migration youths to urbatheir an areas.for instance,lot of young people leave their villages and families in order to reach their ambitions and have better life.Regardless of this fact that a significant number of them get frustrated when they do not reach their goals.

Another reason for this trend is lack of facilities and higher education in rural areas.Parents looking for better future for their children.so,they migrate to mega cities

to provide better chance of education for their children,and in result of that they get better paid job.
Providing loans and offering inducement to businesses can reduce the great deal of migration trend.However,it is not adequate and government have to establish huge universities and make it possible to access first world facilities and transportation.For example,building highways can bring tourist and businesses to these areas.

In conclusion,i do believe government is account for such trends and unless the country budget do not spent efficiently in villages,this trends will rise significantly.

Writing Feedback / Financial education should be mandatory component of the school program [4]

hi every one this is my second essay in here,i hope you could help me and i do appreciate your feedback.
Nevertheless,i am getting ready for IELTS exam so if you could tell if i am getting better due to my last essay or not?

Financial education should be mandatory component of the school program. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
The topic of add financial education as a course to school's syllabus generates heated debate with proponents maintaining it has
fundamental effects in children future life and help them to live in a better way while opponents including parents argue that it is not schools duty to prepare their children for the future.As far as i am concerned,i find myself aligned with opponents who belive

schools are interfering in their life.i have several reasons to demonstrate that its disadvantages outnumbered the few advantages.here are some:
it is obvious that each course needs it is specific books and tutor. It is,therefore,the responsibility of government to set a side a extra budget for the supply of this courses and train some teachers in order to guide the books for the student.it is getting worse when in some countries such as mine the tuition fee is low and the government is responsible to provide facilities to schools and in the result government may face lack of budget for such meaningless courses.

Another reason to fortify my opinion is that parents find it intrusive that today schools and governments trying to teach their children how to live and how to manage their money.for instance,the way of living in each family is different,While some families like to spend so much money in some stuff,some may would like to act miserly and avoid extra expenses

although they are coming from wealthy family.so,schools have to respect the diversities and their right to prepare their children for the society.
providing other courses is much more rational and has better effects on children life.for example, nowdays most task are being done by computers.therefore,it is essential for each child to know how to work with one.

in conclusion,i do believe that from mention reasons it can deduced that financial education is waste of money and some people find it interfere in their business.Nevertheless,it has few advantage which are not worth to mention.

i use some of my friends expression.

Writing Feedback / 21st century is going to be new era and step forward to ambitious that we are calling imagination [3]

The 21st century has begun. What changes do you think this new century will bring?

hey every one, i am getting ready for my IELTS exam and this is the third essay that i do present in here, i would appreciate your feedback.

The 21st century has begun. What changes do you think this new century will bring? Use examples and details in your answer.
The 20st century changed our life style in many ways. Infact, It had significant impact on our lifes that it may seems hard to live without electricity,phones,internet. But,the 21 centrury is going to be new era and step forward to ambitous that we are calling imagination today.here are some examples:

Transporatation is the greatest aspect that would be effected by 21st century.cars that can fly like airplanes and the new generation of planes and trains taht could breake any speed limits would no longer be a dream. In despite of the fact that we already landed on the moon,ordinary people could travel to other plants and spend some time in space.

As far as communication concerened, People are trying to communicate with each other through internet or video calls and the meetings in real world decreasing dramaticly. However, this kind of communication has some bad effects on everyone, the virtual life is playing big role in people's lifes and emtions and respecting to some beliefs may forgotten and robots and dogs may be used instead of humans as your company.

The rate of distance education is rising dramatically, and it would be easier to participate in classes or even write student's thesises based on a variety of sources that are freely shared on the internet or the university site. Nevertheless, Technology is

going to count as an essential part of life and as a result, some traditons may be gone by that time.
In onclusion, I do belive that in 21century living in other planets and imagination are no longer an issue, and human could reach their dreams easier than it used to be.

Writing Feedback / 'People are envy'; advertising encourages us to buy things we really do not need [3]

hi all this is my 4th essay in here.i appreciate your feedback.
Some people say that advertising encourages us to buy things we really do not need. Others say that advertisements tell us about new products that may improve our lives. Which viewpoint do you agree with? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

There is no doubt that advertisements play a big role in selling products. In fact,facing them in inevitable and every day
we are spending so much time watching or reading advertisements that we may not even need. Experts believes that the amount time of advertisement should be controlled in some ways otherwise the people's income spend on equipment that they do not need. Here are some reasons.

In 21st century people are getting more and more envy of each other and become consumer rather than producer or saver. People are trying so hard to fulfill some needs that may no count as their basis needs. For example,nowadays it is very common in western countries that students in their summer time working so hard in order to affording new IPHONE or new computer. Because,they want to have something that their classmate possess. This trend even more significant in adults and a lot of housewives force their husbands to purchase equipment that they saw in Tv.

Companies try to make u believe that with possessions you will live happily ever after. Which is a wrong point of view. Neglecting emotions and sentiments is widespread in advertisements. As a result.people pay more attention to possessions than sentiments which will have substantial horrible impact on their life. For instance, the rate of attempting suicide is rising dramatically and sciences think it is because of a modern world.

However,advertising has its own good and in some ways it helps people in their basic needs. Lot of people informed about a solution to their basic needs by advertisements.competitive market and better quality facilities and equipments are also another benefits of advertising.

In conclusion, i would like to concede that the disadvantages of advertising outweigh its advantage. But if there is control on the amount of advertisements it may show its benefits in a better way.

Writing Feedback / Should we read books that are based on real events, real people? NO [4]

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? People should read only those books that are about real events, real people, and established facts. Use specific reasons and details to support your opinion.

I beg to differ. Fictional books and characters play substantial role not even in children life but even in adults. Omitting such books could impact bookshops,cinemas,industries and even universities.

First and foremost, children should be mentioned as a group who consist a great number of readers.According to a recent static in UK, children are the greatest proportion of book buyers and they spent more than 10 million pound on buying new books. Therefore, publishers are interested to keep this group keen on their books and the best to do that is using fictional characters and stories. Harry potter and lord of the rings are two books which loved by not even children but also their parents. advantage of fictional books do not end here.

Besides, respecting to peoples opinions and rights to choose the books that they want to read is another fact that shouldn't neglected. Nowadays, lot of people would like to overwhelm in story and tales that may not be real. But, this books could relax them for a minute and give them this opportunity to live life on the edge and try to imagine themselves in a world that there is no guns and the magic is the main source of energy. However,this could sound funny.

Another support to fortify my answer is industries specially movies. A great number of best sellers films are movies which their story inspired by fictional books. Batman(the knight of dark) and spiderman series movies are a few sample of this movies. A recent surveys in losangles shows that more people are keen on watch movies with fictional based story rather than real based stories. One can still find so much to mention about this topic.

In conclusion, I concede that fictional books plays big role in any field and omitting them could have unforseen consequences.

Writing Feedback / 'creativity should be devised'; A gift can contribute to a child's development. [3]

Giving Gifts

A gift (such as a camera, a soccer ball, or an animal) can contribute to a child's development. What gift would you give to help a child develop? Why? Use reasons and specific examples to support your choice.

hey gays, i had 5 essay so far and this is my sixth one.the topic is one of those bizarre one. I hope i could handle it appropriately.

There is no doubt that gifts and devices that id play with it in childhood has an important role in their future in any field. In other words, this tiny gift help children to choose their path in life and even their occupation, thus, parents and relatives should choose this gifts with great knowledge of child interest and talent. There are several fact that should be mentioned.

First and foremost, creativity should be devised in a gift. It should let child talent and curiosity grow in some ways. For example, a logo is the most significant kind of this gifts, it allows child mind to create plan for his/her building and then create it base on devices he/she has. Besides, it helps child to think logically and even show him/her the consequences of a wrong path. Advantage of a gift do not end here.

Another fact to fortify my answer is the emotional aspect of a gift. An appropriate gift help child to bond with it in some ways and even express his/her love to it. Toys and dolls are great example of this sort of gifts. According to recent survey in europe shows that 80% of adults indicates that they find the toys that they had in childhood very helpful. They could spent some quality time with them and even call them as a company.

Last but not least, a gift should keep child interested and amazed. Otherwise, the child will get bored and it will not have a suitable impact on them. Moreover, he/she may be reluctant to play with other gifts and as a result, gifts don't play the role that they suppose to. For instance, computer games are a noble ones, they keep not child but even adults interested and they let child to encounter situation that they could not experience it no way in real life. One can still find so much to mention about this factor.

In conclusion, i would concede that creativity and keeping child interested are the most factors in a gift that could contribute child's development

Undergraduate / "the MNSU student" - your background, interests, purpose for studying in uni [3]

Hi everyone!
I am so excited. I got my IELTS result and i would like to thank everyone who helped me in this path now I am applying to a university in US. I am not really familiar with this kind of essay so i would really appreciate your comments.Also please tell me is it enough or not.

Thank you in advance.

topic:Please write a one-page essay in English. Describe your background, interests, purpose for

studying at Minnesota State University, Mankato, and how this education will benefit you and your career.

From the early beginning of my childhood, I was so keen on playing with plates and logos and making new cities and try to manage the roads and buildings. It was obvious to everyone that I was one of those guys who is interested in bringing new ideas into the table and design and innovate new stuff. Thankfully, I had very stable upbringing and my parents let my talent to grow in a very fair way.

During primary school I was the first in my class in every aspect. My passion was my key to success. Then, my parents decided to send me to a private school which was considered the third school in my city. It was then I felt that my place is insecure and I hadto put much more effort to be first in my class. Luckily, I achieved this goal too.

I spent about a year in Malaysia to improve my English and as a result I got 6 on the IELTS exam. . Returning to Iran to get ready to apply for US colleges, I confronted myself with the fact that my mother had been diagnosed with cancer and I was forced to spend two years near her to gain her health back.

While my first intention was to follow Civil engineering program. Because of my family issues I had no other choice but to study in IT major. However, even in this field I showed my talent and I was among the best. Also it helped me to think logically and changed my sight to every aspect, I found that very helpfull in designing and it is asset for me.

After spending two years in college I learnt how to use computer programs to fulfill my childhood ambition. By using programs like 3D-MAX, I was able to draw maps for several interior design companies succh as Andiseye No and Diagaran. As a result I saved some money, thus, I realized now it was the time to make the right choice. My IELTS had expired but this time being better prepared than the last time I took the test and I got an overall of 6.5 .

Deciding which university I wanted to attend was the hardest choice I had to make, but in the end I chose the Minnesota state university of Mankato because of several reasons. According to U.S. News & World Report, the MSU Civil Engineering program is ranked consistently among the best universities in the USA. Moreover, it has a joint program with several companies. Therefore, the students become familiar with real situation and how to overcome them.

By studying civil engineering at your esteemed university I hope to build up on my knowledge of math and physics and learn how to apply them in real life. Having enjoyed my time at school and college. I am excited by the prospect of going to university and learning more about the world around us. I hope to become prepared for challenging and diverse career where I can help to improve the world for future generations to come

USA has the biggest and best infrastructure in the world. I have seen the Minneapolis ,los angeles bridge and buldings and manhattan skyscraper. And I have so much in mind to built and design unique structures in my home town.

I feel confident that I will continue my studies until I get a PHD degree. I like to work as a researcher and university professor afterwards. With my high interest, experience and aptitudes in civil engineering and my cognition of the USA I'm sure that I will be successful as an international engineer in future.