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Posts by winniesun
Joined: Jun 5, 2011
Last Post: Jul 7, 2011
Threads: 9
Posts: 19  

From: Myanmar

Displayed posts: 28
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winniesun   
Jul 7, 2011
Writing Feedback / IELTS: Space Exploration, money should be spent on? 'few compulsory drawbacks' [2]

The money currently being spent on space exploration could be better spend on people in the Third World countries do you agree or disagree?

As the competition between developed countries has become frequent, they try to build a reputation by means of exploration into the space. In recent years, there arises as a controversial issue of spending that astronomical cost should be on the projects outside the world or places closer to home. There does seem to me that such investment should be taken into account in concerned with space exploration.

It is not rare to see the reluctant numbers of deprived countries in which our human kind suffer from hunger and other varieties of diseases that should be taken drastic action for their welfare. Moreover, natural disasters become alarming topics which usually aggravate consequences that itself was. Therefore, it seems to be reasonable that we should aware of transforming our community on the earth to a better place first.

On the other side of the coin, searching a new territory for our future make sense for some extent. As evidence of this, global warming, diverse pollutions and natural disaster illustrate our habitant land as a demolished world. What if that risk will be increased in the near future? Perhaps, transit to our neighbor planets may be the best solution.

On top of that, some of the measure to facilitate the living of astronauts could also contribute to our society from a different perspective. Some expects narrate that the technological innovation like telemedicine, which is originally purpose for treating astronauts in space with rapid progress, has been applied to communicate doctors with patients in inaccessible part of the world. What is more, water sterilization systems on space shuttle can help to filter contaminated water at the regions destroyed by floods and earthquakes.

All in all, from my point of view, the rampant technologies like space exploration can higher advancement of life quality, although there may be a few compulsory drawbacks. As far as space exploration concerned, nobody can utterly deny the feasible positive outcomes that can improve quality of life on our planet.
winniesun   
Jul 7, 2011
Writing Feedback / IELTS> "Employees working at home" contribute benefits to employers? [3]

I'm so nervous now, Exam become nearer...
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Modern technology brings benefits to employees since they can work at home, but the benefits do not contribute to the employers. To what extend do you agree or disagree

flexible approach to the modern working



In an age of rampant technology, the strategies for establishing a successful enterprise have changed over year. As evidence of this, there can be easily seen that the restriction of a working place for an employee is not a compulsory anymore with the explosion of internet access system by which they can appreciate their works from home. However, some people are drawn to pessimistic view with these policies which only can make profit for the employees and there will be no positive aspects for employers. It seems to be that providing a peaceful working environment for workers can create many benefits for the owners beyond than we expected.

There does seem to be evidence that we could not measure the work done which is performed in the employee's own house hold where they may not fully put effort to their tasks and may break their obligation. With the lack of proper management, there has been high possibility of not finishing work within a time limit. However, can we expect merely the downsides from this modern workplace?

Despite its certain drawbacks and defects, I do strongly agree that without perpetual worrying for the time taken by transportation, means not only can save working hours but also can gain more workforces from employees. Another factor that can be contributed is that actual talented people who are, unfortunately disabled can fully appreciate that alternative workplace.

Nobody can deny that the conventional way of working by sitting the whole day at an office desk can impose stressful environment. Instead, performing a particular task in more familiar place surrounded by their beloved family member may encourage the employees to produce more work done. Last but not least is that this new commitment from the authorities of a company can persuade the genius professional and experienced employees to be a part of their business.

All in all, these flexible approaches to modern working pattern seem to be worthwhile for both entrepreneurs and salary receivers. Nevertheless, in my opinion, face to face communication between employers and employees should be taken into account by creating in a traditional working environment at least one day a week to establish mutual understanding.
winniesun   
Jul 6, 2011
Writing Feedback / Working moms cause problems in the society - ILETS [7]

Can I ask you one question?
Is it Ok to use personal experience (as you mention one of my friend...) in IELTS essays?
PS.. I think conclusion is a bit short..
:)
winniesun   
Jul 5, 2011
Writing Feedback / IELTS Tourism: Advantages outweigh Disadvantages? 'setting restriction areas' [4]

I have to take IELTS exam on July 9. Please help me.
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As international travel becomes cheaper, more and more people travel and more countries open their doors for increasing numbers of tourists. What do you think? The advantages of tourism outweigh the disadvantages.

In an age of rampant globalization, 'tourism' enterprises has become hot issue throughout the world as more and more people have rooted the curiosity about the alien cultures at the other side of the world. At that point, some inhabitants point out that accepting a vast numbers of tourists to their land means they are unavoidably welcoming the threat to their beloved country. As far as I am concerned, 'tourism' may bring much more benefits than we have expected and should not fully banned in our modern society.

It cannot be argue the fact that our homeland is being spoilt by tourists. With the increasing amount of foreign visitors, the tour company tends to extend their markets by searching unusual and may be greener places for tourist attraction. As a consequence, that places are left as unpleasant are left as unpleasant areas filled with all kinds of garbage's and by-products from camping site of the tour groups. Moreover, the way they dress and behave might be imitated by indigenous young people who may lead to erosion of our own culture and also a loss of culture identify.

On the other hand, if we have well-educated attitude which can direct us only to learn their culture in order to gain proper understanding of the people different from us, the positive exchange between cultures and traditions can be appreciated. In addition, that might be a progress to promote our wonderful culture and breath-taking scenery proudly in the middle of the world.

The view from economics can also be taken into consideration in concerned with 'tourism' which can significantly give profits by means of foreign currency, the main stream of income for a nation. What is more, there have been sprung up of local shops around popular visited areas and therefore the rate of unemployment's can be cut down during tourist season.

All in all, although our valuable land may be suffered from environment pollution and loss of natural resources created by tourists, we should not neglect the outstanding beneficial effects that come together. From my point of view, government ought to impose rules and regulations by setting tourist-restriction areas as a protective shield for our mother land.
winniesun   
Jul 3, 2011
Writing Feedback / A beautiful girl at night time [9]

Because being a guy who never wants to give up with this easily, he still continued walking behind her.
I think he behave like a manly manner and not give up due to his pride. :)
By the way, that's the true story?
winniesun   
Jul 3, 2011
Writing Feedback / Ielts - it would be unwise to assume a good economy is all that's needed for a country [3]

I'm not sure that my essay goes well with the Question. If you do have better ideas, please give me. .. thank you
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Economic progress is one way to measure a country's success. Some say that there are other ways to consider a country's success. What are the other ways left? Which one is the most important thing to measure the success of a nation?

In the globalization age, the financial situation of a country has played an important role not to be undermined by other rations. For this concept, government put on effort to convert as an affluent country this concept, government put on effort to convert as a affluent country by some means of strategic planning. While a vast number of people believe that the development in economic can bring a country up to a certain destination the development in economic can bring a country up to a certain destination, some people think that there are many other factors left to be highlighted.

Firstly, there must be convinced that education is the strongest foundation to build an infrastructure of a country. Therefore, we should nurture the children to be educated people who can contribute welfare to their own land in their adult life. For example, China which usually regarded as a deprived country turned into a rich one as a result of well organized education scheme.

Secondly, as a saying goes 'health is wealth', only the citizens with sound health can confer themselves to flourish the progress their territories. There is an obligation of the government to make sure that every people, who are the human resources, have access to good health care.

Finally, to build a reputation as a well developed nation, the advanced technology has to be applied widely throughout the country. Moreover, the government should invest a certain extent of budget in the projects of technology research. We can take the United States of America, Japan and Russia, as an example, as they can influence the world with modern technology innovations.

All in all, although many people in our era drawn to the optimistic view of marvelous economic as the only need for the country, it would be unwise to assume the economic as the only need for the country. To be more precise, education, health and advanced technology are as equally important as that financial pattern, however, the health sector can be titled more significant one since only can healthy person can ensure to take part in other sectors.
winniesun   
Jul 3, 2011
Writing Feedback / Giving mobile phones to the unemployed (IELTS ESSAY) [6]

Hi Geenesh,
I'm also a candidate and plan to take IELTS exam.
My teacher said that at introduction "Today" and "Nobody" are really common.
Some examiner don't like the essay start with that words..
winniesun   
Jun 15, 2011
Writing Feedback / IELTS >More couples saying no to having kids [2]

Yesterday, my teacher let me to read a newspaper article about "More couples saying no to having kids" and so I have to write an essay about that topic.

The question may be"More couples saying no to having kids. What are the reasons, effects and how to solve it?"
Thank you all for your kindness.

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As the world develops as a modern society, people have to deal with more daily tasks than ever before. The couples, nowadays, have suffered pressure from every sources that make them to decide not to have a child. The opinion for nor consideration of accepting a kid considerably influence as some people point out that this kind of views should not be permitted.

It is quite difficult to make a sound living standard due to the expanded household cost, people find childcare fees as a burden, as well as. Closes off parents' options, for example, they might scarify their opportunities for better career or leisure times. Moreover, the most challenging task is to raise a child as a 'quality child' who can do well in their academic performance and smoothly get ahead in life, and so, this is undoubtedly highly labour-intensive process.

However, if a country decreases in birth rate, there may have unavoidable negative consequences. Firstly, ever-increasing number of immigrants to keep the economy running by recovering the workforce may probably lead to culture mixing which can affect the national identy. Secondly, if couples do not have their own children, they would have no one to look after in their later years, additionally, they may experience the feeling what is so called the loneliness.

What can government do to handle this situation? In my opinion, government ought to be the one who can solve this problem cleverly by making rules and regulations tor encouraging the couples to hold positive attitude about having a child. For instance, Australian government give a certain amount of subsidy to the parents of newly born children, and by this way, people would eventually have less fear of parenting.

All in all, from my point of view, refusing to have a child is an unpleasant thought just by considering the short-term freedom and benefits. Nevertheless, as far as I am concerned, couples should make a much wiser decision by looking forward to a far much favorable outcomes of having a kid in their lives.
winniesun   
Jun 13, 2011
Writing Feedback / IELS> Creative artists to express their ideas should be restricted by government? [2]

Thanks for your help in my previous essays.
:)

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Creative artists should always be given the freedom to express their own ideas (in words, pictures, music or film) in whichever way they wish. There should be no government restrictions on what they do. To what extend do you agree or disagree with the opinion?

Since many competitions take place in the world we live nowadays, the sense of creativity become need for everyone. Among the living creatures, artists are usually the ones who contribute the new things to us, nevertheless sometimes, government makes some restrictions on their creative talents. Some people pose the question about whether this government act is necessary or not.

There does seem to be evidence that some creative arts have been mislead young adults to the wrong directions and even cause the influence of bad personalities. For instance, the lyrics in some modern songs motivate teenagers to vow unsuitable manners; besides encourage using unfavorable words to their parents and teachers. Furthermore, some artist create their art beyond the level that can maintain our precious culture, as a consequence our society might suffer the culture loss.

On the other hand, if the artists edit some weak points of, for example, play or music with their creativity, our culture may be recognized than ever before. By this way, government should put an effort to these new culture resources in order to distribute into globalized market by which the country's budget can be contributed, In addition, the artists of sculptures and pictures must have creative skill to compete with international artists to enlighten their image of their country.

It is obvious that the genius with unusual ideas is difficult to find so that we should support and give applause for their abilities. On top of that, respect for the opportunities for individual should be given, likewise, the freedom is the right of an artist.

All in all, our society would go backward or remain undeveloped, if there were no place for creative art. From my point of view, governments should only restrict for unacceptable arts by reducing their rules and regulation to warmly welcome the world of creation.
winniesun   
Jun 9, 2011
Writing Feedback / The rulers are well-educated; Directors of large companies receive big salaries [3]

Please have a look at my essay and help to find my mistakes.
Thank you all.

:)

Q: Directors of large companies often receive much bigger salary increases than ordinary workers.
Employers' organizations say that in a global market this is necessary to attract the best management talent. Do you agree or disagree?


In this age of economics, as the business system improves a lot, the upper heads of the companies earn quite pretty salaries than those of ordinary workers. Some people have a feeling of being uncertain about whether this concept should be continued or not.

There is no doubt to believe that the directors of companies have to put much effort as they receive such a great deal of money, so that they must prove they are worth it. As far as I concerned, the rulers of the world's greatest companies are well-educated enough to maintain the whole systems of the companies. Otherwise, if they did something wrong in making decisions or planning projects, they have to take responsibilities for what they did which might even make them to give up all the properties they have. Moreover, they are the only persons who may be blamed when the companies cannot result in good outcome. It seems that the directors obviously face the stress from their workplace in daily lives, consequently sometimes may cause problems in health. Therefore, people should accept the truth about the big responsibilities and suffers that can explain considerably why the directors receive huge amount of salaries.

Some people still believe that, with the same working hours per day, ordinary employees should also get more earning than they usually receive. They also have the right to say the things like they usually do exactly what they are ordered by concentrating on their job, they should get equal amount of reward.

To sum up, by taking consideration into both views, it is justified that the most responsible person should gain the most. But we must not forget the fact that companies ought to support hard-working basic workers in their respective fields in order to encourage them to try hard with the belief of having opportunities for being paid super salaries.
winniesun   
Jun 6, 2011
Writing Feedback / Mass media means a bridge between people in different places [6]

I really want to improve my English skill within a month. Please help me. I'll take my IELTs exam next month.

Compare the advantages and disadvantages of three of the following as media for communicating information. State which you consider to be the most effective.

- Comics
- Books
- Radio
- Television
- Film
- Theatre


choosing the best media for communication



Most people agree that the 21st century can be called 'the age of media', which is quite true as the world of media influences us in different ways. However, some of these bring benefits for us, there are also bad points. Since the advancement of technology, people today are getting attached to television and films, books also make its position to stand at the top of media list.

Firstly, books have the special power to maintain the daily lives of the children and those of middle-aged people. For educational purpose, children have to study text books where they can gain knowledge that can surely improve their thinking skills. The role of novels or magazines cannot be neglected because they are chosen by most middle-aged in order to learn about logical events. Moreover, we can get and read books easily whenever we need from bookstore or shops although without much room for pictures in book and full of words pages make us easily get boring.

Secondly, the majority of older people find television as the best entertainment for their age. Television, known as the massive media, broadcast a wide range of different programmes. The most noticeable advantage is up-to-date news of the world or local places so that we can know what things are going on today. Some TV programmes like Discovery show how animals struggle for their living so that we should value and protect them. On the contrary, a lot of advertisements interfere with our interest and make us feel like we are wasting time.

Finally, I want to mention about films by which a huge number of young people are addicted. For instance, Korean films are a hit to the Myanmar youngsters; can even be mentioned as 'Korean Wave'. I personally believe that we can learn many good things such as manners, historical facts and living standard in other countries if we watch foreign films with a positive attitude. But, imitations can sometimes cause terrible culture mixing and may result in violence.

To sum up, media means a bridge between people in different places to look forward to more advanced globalization, so, in my opinion, we should properly use media with better intentions to level up our social skills for better lifestyle.
winniesun   
Jun 5, 2011
Writing Feedback / IELTS>Safe alternatives to fossil fuels should be the most important global priority? [4]

The explanation and development of safe alternatives to fossil fuels should be the most important global priority today.
To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Due to the developed living standard in the world's richest country, enormous amount of products that can still be used become end up their life. With the modern technology, people are more and more addicted to latest products as a symbol of upper-class standard. In this way it is likely to see the most serious problem to the environment has been invited which is made by people themselves.

It seem to be true that thrown-away products system bring a more or less benefits to economics by the fact that the companies can survive by producing new creations and also has a positive effect on technology by being involved in researching or producing of the latest models.

But these advantages can actually bring better life to us? I have a strong opinion that environment issue is far must be cared than economics factors. Over usage of papers or fast food containers can lead to deforestation which is the major cause of global warming inviting natural disasters like earthquakes or tsunamis. Furthermore, most of the products are made of plastics and when they are thrown away easily, they never disappear and last for thousand years. If someone try to destroy them either by burning which can pollute the air causing health problems, or by disposing to the ocean killing millions of wildlife in water.

In fact, a huge amount of daily domestic products like washing machines, televisions and other usable things are becoming garbage everyday in developed countries. Being replaced by new products is not always good as we usually think. Some experts say that new products may be uncomfortable to the user and most important of all they can emit large amount of carbon than the old things.

All in all, there is no doubt that we must reduce the amount of garbage we produce by buying less, aiming for products in smaller packaging or using we have already had. I believe that we should save our environment by using 3R of resources and recycling, which means reduce, reuse and recycle.
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