Writing Feedback / Cbest Essay: Opportunity to travel [4]

Hi

Need help in my essay.

Thanks for any feedback and comments

If you are given a chance to travel in a place you've never been before, which place would you like to visit? Give vivid picture of the place, why you want to visit it and the benefits you will obtain from it.

There is a saying that goes like this "Travel and See" and when you travel you will discover a different perspective of the world that you had never experienced. At the age of 12, I vividly recalled displaying a globe in my room. I was captivated with the beauty of Asia from my history class. It inspires me to mark my globe, highligthing the conitnet I aspire to visit, Asia. Given an opportunity, I will first visit Singapore, a gateway for travellers like me to take a sneak peak of Asian wonders. This small urban yet dynamic city was designed strategically to visit other Asian countries. It has astonishing attractions and is a multicultural city where "East meets West".

Traveller's Magazine, 2007 showcased Singapore as a strategic place to visit Indonesia, Malaysia, China, Philippines, and other Asian countries. This city is well adorned by visitors because public transportation is affordable and accessible. It only takes a day or two to vast in the beauty of Singapore. On your 3rd day, you can hop in a bus and visit Petronas Twin Tower in Malaysia and come back to your hotel to catch up with Singapore's Night Safari. Wake up on your 4th day and get ready to hop in a ferry on your way to Genting Highlands in Indonesia. If I still have enough budget, I will book a flight to Beijing, China to see a renowned wonder of the world, the Great Walls. And include Shezhen, China to climb up the Forbidden City and reach the top of Temple of Heaven. It's also a freeing experience to visit Philippines where there are tropical rainforest and underwater reefs that will relax my tired muscle. China and Philippines are both aa few hours flight away from Singapore.

Besides the city's strategic location, Singapore has lots of astonishing attractions. The Merlion which was famous not only for its beauty but also of its history. Its fascinating to learn how Singapore originated and why we call it the "Lion City". Another famous city's attraction is Sentosa Park, Disneyland's counterpart. As a child, I enjoyed visiting Disneyland every summer. So why not ride a train and visit Sentosa Park located at the Southern most part of Singapore. This small park has a lot to offer from Dolphins, Underwater creatures, cable rides and a magical night shows that will captivate everyone's heart. And dig in another train ride to watch the colorful birds at Jurong Park. And lastly, spend a relaxing dinner at Esplanade with free musical bands and a taste of Singapore's hawker food. My bestfriend, Lanie shared her memorable photos of her summer trip to this Lion City. She was awed how cost and time efficient it was to see a lot of places in her week journey. She also learned so much from different cultures in Singapore. A city similar to California, a multicultural place where you meet nice and friendly people.

I always loved the story East meets West. A story that depicts magnificient result of mixing different cultures. My great grandparents has great influence in my fascination in learning diverse culture. I was brought up adapting different cultures since my grandmother has a Chinese ancestry while my grandfather has a Korean ancestry. Moreso, my dad is an American while my mom grew up in leaving in different parts of Asia. Singapore held a special place in my parent's heart, a place where they first met each other. I have heard lots of stories from them about how warm and cozy Asians are. Learning from their culture and traditions is a unique experience.

If there is one word to describe Asia, I would say spectacular. Someday, I will visit this place and see for myself how magnificient it is. To see is to believe as the saying goes. Starting with Singapore as a gateway for Asian countries. Enjoy its astonishing attractions and diverge in different culture as East meets West.

Writing Feedback / CBEST - 'Working abroad'; Making Important Decision [3]

Describe a particular time in your life when you had difficulty making an important decision. Identify the situation and explain whether you were able to resolve the problem. If it was resolved, how? If not, why not-what happened?

Working abroad to help support your own family is a dream come true for people coming from a third-world country. Indeed, I was one of them who aspired to find a better job where there is greener pasture. There are advantages and disadvantages that must be considered before making a decision. The decision did not came easily as I had to weight it carefully. Working abroad includes adjustment in language and culture, yet, it will bring financial assistance and growth in my profession as a teacher.

On August 2006, I received an invitation to teach in the United States. However, the timing was too difficult since I just gave birth to my 1 year son. It was not just an overnight tete-a-tete with my husband whether I should accept the offer. We discussed and weighed the pro's and cons of me leaving them behind and living on my own in a place where everything will be new. We consulted friends and relatives who can give us advices what things to expect and not expect if I decide to work abroad. For example, my college friend from New York emailed me and informed me that language is one of the greatest barrier I might encounter as a teacher. English is my secondary language and I can speak fluently yet not so eloquently like any Americans. Somehow Americans have different manner of expressing their thoughts the way Filipinos do. Colloquial conversation is different like Americans practically say "How are you?" with strangers as courtesy. In my country, we greet others only intimate friends to start a long and friendly conversation.

Every country has their own unique culture and beliefs. Americans practically are westernized while Filipinos are conservative citizens. Thus, I was brought up to be family-oriented while Americans are taught to be independent. Moving in the United States, means living by myself in my apartment, preparing food and cleaning the house on my own. Labor was cheap back home, and affording a cleaning lady and a nanny was convenient for everyone. It is a cliche for Filipino families in the city to hire relatives who lives in the suburb as nanny. Since we value family so much, fringe benfits such as free education is provided to their children. It is the exact opposite for Americans, where they spend enormous money for daycare of their children.

Working abroad however, will provide financial assistance for my son's future. I will be able to bring him to the USA and provide him with better education. Michelle my friend, was separated from her family for 3 years. She texted me and said that after years of waiting, she was happy that her family's petition was finally approved. She now lives with her husband and daughter in San Diego. To add up, my experience in USA will increase my skill and knowledge as a teacher. I knew a lot of Asians, who taught back in their home country after gathering 5 years of teaching experience in USA. During a teacher conference in my country, a school director from Washington demonstrated the use of internet media inside the classroom. I was awed how modern American facilities can offer their students.

Finally, after 1 month of decision making, my husband and I agreed and decided to accept the job. We knew that it will be difficult at first but there are a lot of ways to make some adjustments. I took the risk and was willing to sacrifice with hopes that I can reunite with them in years time. In my thoughts and mind, I am willing to sacrifice a few years when the reward will be benefecial for my son's future. I have been teaching in California for 3 years, I was able to get along with the system and culture in this foreign country. Thanks a lot to the marvelous internet technology that hooked me up to my family constantly. I also met new friends (Asians and Americans) who accompanied me in times of loneliness. My friends and I just love cooking different food and bringing it to each other house.

The idea of working broad is an exciting prospect to many people. Yet, in making a decision thorough comparison of its advantages and disadvantages must be considered. In the end, I found happiness in choosing to accept my teaching job in this country. Yes, there were adjustment to be made in language and culture. However, a learning experience that brough financual assistance and growth in my career as a teacher.

Writing Feedback / CBEST Essay - Students caught DUI [3]

Hi, can someone review my essay. thanks

The state law penalizes students caught DUI by suspending their driver's liscense. State whether you agree or disagree. Support your answer.

"America was once a kingdom of safe drivers, but now it is transforming into a society of reckless drunken drivers," stated by USA Today in its 2008 issue. DMV clearly stated a law to penalize those who will be caught DUI under the age of 21, yet, a strict implementation is necessary. I strongly agree in the state law suspending driver's liscense of students are caught DUI. Penalizing and suspending a driver's liscense decreases road accidents, brings maturity for young drivers and teaches citizen to be law abiding.

Although driving while texting has been the number cause of road accidents, yet, we can't deny the fact that DUI among young drivers is still number two on the list. In fact, SF Chronicle in its January 2009 issue showed an increase in statistics by 50% from last years number. Studies show that drivers aged 17-24 years old are more susceptible to road accidents compared with drivers aged 25-35 years old. This tells us that DUI is prominent among younger ones. Suspending liscense will lessen DUI drivers at night since a a restricted driver's liscense will only allow a person to drive to and from school. A year ago, my neighbor's son was caught and got his liscense suspended. For months, he did not drive while intoxicated with alcohol for fear of being caught again and have his liscense revoked. It is like hitting two killers at the same time. Suspending a liscense will eliminate drunk drivers on the road and eliminate drinking among young ones. Or better yet, once suspended a person learns to be extra careful with his actions, thereby, decreasing road accidents especially at night.

Suspending a driver's liscense will indeed bring maturity to a young driver. Definitely young ones will learn their lessons once they tasted deprivation from driving. How in the world can you survive without driving your own car in this country? I honestly can't imagine life if I have to drive my teenagers in every parties they have to attend too. Surely, they would hate to be seen by friends being driven by their parents all the time. My friend's son, Tim, learned his lesson the hard way. After being caught and had his liscense suspended he tried to avoid driving when intoxicated. For a month, he had to ask favor from friends to pick him up whenever he want to hang out with them. For him, it was humiliating and unbearable calling and arranging schedule with friends to pick him up. He was turned down on several occasions. Sometimes he had to let go his own activities and was left with no choice but to stay at home. He surely learned his lesson and made him look at life in a mature way. As the movie, "DUI: Dead in 5 Seconds" where Russell Turner shares his tragedy and informs us that driving under the influence is a choice. It's a choice that has possible lifelong consequences. Tim, my friend's son, choose to play it safe and avoid its lifelong consequences like accidents or death.

We all have pledge allegiance to our flag to abide by the law. Definitely this includes abiding by the state law. I believe in Pres. Woodrow's quote that "Freedom is like a steam, it is useless unless it is contained." He actually meant like a child we are given our freedom to do what we want to do. Yet as we grow up we need to be subjected to laws. Without containing this freedom, there will be no direction. We will all be free to do and act the way we want. In the same scenario, we all have freedom to drive yet driving entails responsibility and maturity to ensure safety in the road and towards our fellow citizen.

Suspending a student's driver's liscense caught DUI may stir up disagreement to some citizens. Yet, the benefits outweights the risk of road accidents in our country. It will lead to maturity among suspended drivers and develop law abiding citizens.

Writing Feedback / Cbest Essay - Missing Opportunity in Life [5]

Hi

I hope someone can help me out with my essay. Thanks in advance for al the help.

Write an essay about you or someone you know who missed an opportunity that he/she regretted in life.

Last year, I received a call from my college friend, Johnny. He called my cellphone to express how much he regretted his cousin's death. All I had in mind was to tell him, "Live your life so that your days will not be full of regrets". It has been over a month, yet, he could forget the death of his cousin, Bob. He told me that there were nights he would wake up and blame himself for being intoxicated with alcohol on the night of the tragedy. If only he was not drunk, he would not gone beyond the limit of pushing Bob to far in the water. Or maybe, he could have saved him from drowning since he was a good swimmer and a surfer.

On a hot and sunny summer, Johnny surprised Bob with a new surfboard. It was Bob's first surfboard since he grew up in Japan. Johnny and Bob planned a long weekend drive from Daytona to Miami Beach. He promised Bob to teach him basic strokes to keep him moving along the waves. They both had a wonderful moment driving along the road. Bob loved sun bathing while Johnny loved surfing. Everything went just right the way they planned it. They stopped by the seafood restaurant and drank a bottle of beer. They took magnificient shots of the coast during sunset. At night, they walked together and made some bonfire. Bob was pretty exhausted so he told Johnny he wanted to call it the night. Johnny on the otherhand, wanted to drink more beer and was left by himself. He drank and drank and was unable to control himself anymore. Thus, he woke up Bob and invited him to practice how to surf. Bob was hesitant since it would be his first time. Johnny was very persistent so he gave in to his invitation.

No one knew a tragedy was about to happen. The sea was calm and the sky was clear. Johnny was a great swimmer and a surfer. He won numerous award in his school. Bob placed his complete trust and faith to Johnny that nothing bad will happen to him. Bob was able to surf with a few unbalanced moves yet and was having fun. Suddenly, a riptide swooved him down in his surfboard. He told Johnny to that they both need to get some rest and continue surfing in the morning. Johnny however, was too obnovious to listen. His drunkenness was unbearable. Bob got out of the cold water when Johnny pulled and dragged him back to the waves.

Soon Bob was taken away out of the surfboard. Johnny did not bother reaching for Bob. He taught it was just a trick to convince him to get out of the water. Suddenly the unexpected riptide pushed Bob farther away. It was not a large wave but Bob started drowning. Johnny was still caught unaware that Bob needed help. So he ignored Bob's plea for help. Then Bob was nowhere to be found maybe for about 3-5 minutes. The next thing Johnny remembered was bringing Bob's frozen body in the hospital. It was too late, the doctors was not able to revive Bob.

Truly, there are a lot of opportunities in our lives. We are given the choice to live each day without regrets. My friend had his own which he regretted so much. It was too late for him to realize that alcohol impairs his judgment. He missed out the opportunity of saving his cousin's life. Poor Johnny, he surely learned his own lesson in a hard way.

Writing Feedback / Cbest Essay - Person Most Instrumental in Shaping Your Life [6]

Hi

I need help with my essay. Thanks a lot.

Some students can look back in their years in school and pinpoint one particular course or one particular teacher most instrumental in shaping their lives. Reflect on your own years and focus on one such instructor or course. Describe the conditions or qualities that made that particular experience or teacher special.

People often asked me, "Who was the person that inspired you to be a teacher?" I immediately replied, "Oh, he is Dr. Albert, my college math professor." His real name is Dr. Albert but my college friends are fond of calling him Mr. Mathematician. He was my college professor for two semesters. He taught tough subjects like Advanced Statistics and Advanced Calculus. Now, you have an idea why we called him Mr. Mathematician. For me, he was Mr. Awesome as he touched my life magnanimously. He had a great impact in my life for being an exceptionally smart person, a fantastic joker and conversationalist as well as a dedicated teacher.

He was the smartest among all my professors. He graduated with a Doctorate Degree in Mathematics at Harvard University. Nowadays, we barely meet someone who excels in Mathematics, enjoys the subject and makes Math enjoyable for everyone. I reminished a difficult math problem which I could not comprehend. He noticed my tensed face and approached my desk . He gave me a pat to relax me for not catching up with the Math problem. He politely asked my seat mate to help me out. He ensured me that there is no reason to be embarassed. That incident gave me confidence to seek help and to speak up whenever I find math difficult.

What I liked best is his sense of humor. Have you seen someone crack math jokes in the middle of an exam. His jokes fill the room with laughter and lessen the tension. It made everyone relax and enjoy the day without worrying if we fail or pass the exam. Along with his sense of humor, he is also a good conversationalist. I remembered his unique teaching style, he begins his Math lesson with a 10 minute chat. He practically talks about everything from relationships, service to God, career path and even the latest fashion.

But above all, I have not met anyone that matches his dedication as a teacher. Since Math is a hard subject, he pulled up an extra remedial class for everyone. He was always available during our consulation hours from Mon-Fri. He freed up his Saturday afternoon voluntarily to conduct review sessions and extra problem solvings. He came up with the idea of conducting extra sessions, even when the school would not pay for his extra hours. Once, he told the class "The extra hours are voluntary; nobody is obliged to attend but it would help you a lot. All I wanted is to ensure that you learn something and hopefully pass the exam." Indeed, everyone in class ensured their presence since we knew we will learn much from him.

I will always give back Dr. Albert the credit due to him. He motivated me to pursue my course. The idea of teaching Math for me was something vague during my childhood. But because of his examples, I became a Math teacher and valued my job as a teacher. For me, he was truly a role model with his exceptional intelligence, good sense of humor and dedication as a teacher. A teacher like him deserves a big applause for shaping students' lives.

Writing Feedback / Cbest Essay - Memories are instruments that will teach us valuable lessons [3]

Hi,

I am reviewing for my Cbest and I read this kind of essay in one of the thread.
It inspired me to write my own essay. I hope someone can review it and send me a feedback especially how much grammatical errors I've committed.

Thanks

Do memories hinder or help people in their effort to learn from the past and succeed in the present and future, Support with reasons and examples.

Precious memories are fond to remember. While painful memories are hard to forget. I believe whether they are good or bad memories, they all teach us a valuable lessons in life.Memories allow us to learn from the past and succeed in our present and future lives. My friends and I had lots of wonderful and painful memories which inspired and guided us as we walk in our path of lives.

I love reading books and one of my favorite is Bo Sanchez. He is a preacher who wrote a bestselling book entitled "Your Past Does Not Define Your Future". His book taught me a very valuable lesson as he wrote "Whatever I have done on the past it may or may not define my future." It is our choice whether to let our life be entrapped in memories of the past. After reading his book, I choose to use joyful memories to inspire me and use hurtful memories to correct my mistakes and to move forward in life. For example, one of the most hurtful memory I can recall was during at the time my engagement was called off. My fiancee and I were both young and very passionate yet none of us was ready to take in responsibilities. We had several fights during our wedding preparation that led to a decision for us to break up. The break up snowballed into an avalanche of pain and humiliation. It was difficult for me to face everyone especially after sending out the wedidng invitations and paying our church/hotel reservations. However, I used this experience to warn me to be more careful in my succedding relationship. Now, I am happily married for 5 years with a better partner in life.

Even the Bible speaks about how to handle our past. In Isaiah it says "Dwell not on the things of the past, see the Lord is doing something new in your life". This verse was an inspiring message that I read when I failed in my job applications as a math teacher. I felt so depressed after not landing in the teaching job that I dreamt for so long. I was almost about to quit finding a job. After 2 years, I met new friends who inspired me to be a special education teacher. During my practicum as a sped teacher, my school director offered me my first teaching job as a sped teacher. Have I given up easily I would have not been in the teaching academe by now.

I was in awe on how my friend handled a very painful memory in her life. She grew up in a broken family living with her grandparents after she got physically abused by her stepdad. Amidst her difficult circumstances in life, she did not let the pains be a hurdle to stop her from building her own family. Each time I ask her how she manage to handle herself, her reply would be "Just think positive and never let the pain stop you from dreaming". Two years after, she graduated from college, live independently and got married. Now, she is happily married with his husband for 10 years. She used her painful experience to nurture her 2 year old son and provided him with all the love she can give.

Indeed, memories are instruments that will teach us valuable lessons. It is like a treasure box where we place our old stuff to cherish. At the time we recall old things in life, we open it and cherish the memories we had in life. It will be bring inspiration and guidance for us to look for see present life positively and aspire for a brigther future.

Writing Feedback / Cbest - Back to Basics [2]

Hi

Would appreciate to hear your feedback on this essay.

Thanks

Topic: A recent movement in education has been called "Back to Basics." Its proponents argue that the curriculum should concentrate only on reading, writing and mathematics skills and completely ignore such courses as sociology, art appreciation, and drama. Imagine that you are a school principal faced with the task of making policy for your school. PResent your argument(s) either for or against "Back to Basics."

Recently, discussions on "Back to Basics" curriculum awakened. Newpaper columnists and school educators express different opinions whether it is a good or bad policy public schools. I support proponents of "Back to Basics" curriculum in their stand that the curriculum should concentrate only on reading, writing and mathematics skills instead of other courses. True indeed that the said curriculum may have minor flaws. However, its flaws outweights the benefits it provides to our students. Back to Basic curriculum improves student's skill, minimizes school expenditures and strengthens students competitiveness.

A district director in Arizona in an interview by USA Today, testified that the implementation of the said curriculum brought an improvement in their fifth grade level during state aptitude test last year. The district director marked a consistent increase again by the end of this schoolyear. Noting that the number of students who pass the test increased by about 20-25% this year. The district attributed the improvement in focusing their curriculum in mathematics especially in basic algebra. The district spend a lot of time and effort training their teacher to be highly qualified in mathematics. Teachers were given all the support to adapt new strategies and methods to make mathematics interesting and motivating to students. Moreso, Greensboro School District is another advocate of the "Back to Basics" curriculum who gained much improvement in their student's writing ability. Greensboro adapted a unique system called "Writer's Notebook Project" whereby student's are tasked to write everything in their journal. Students as young as kindergarden are trained to write whatever they feel in a journal. Sometimes free essay topics are given. Sometimes teacher assigns homeworks with topics relating to issues like current news, favorite movies, modern technology and current fashions. Sometimes students are asked to read a short essay or story and are asked to express their different heresays or point of views in writing.

The curriculum not only improves student's skill but is also serves as a solution to our current problem, the budget cut. With the Great Depression soaring high this year, districts will have to spend money in areas like mathematics and english literacy (reading and writing skills). I have read last month an article from San Francisco Chronicle exposing some district school who spends much of their budget every 7 years in purchasing new books. Just imagine your school district spend money in changing a History book every 7 years. Does American history changed that much since we are preschoolers? Is it justifiable to continue changing books amidst the tremendous budget cut for education? Of course not! the money may should be saved for a more reasonable school projects. Moreso, school district spends a lot of money in programs to support drama and physical education such as high school drama shows and sports competition. It would be awesome if the money is saved to further increase teacher's salaries. The shift in implementing "Back to Basics" curriculum from traditional system will provide more employment to highly skilled professionals like computer programmers, accountants and authors/writers who were layed off from their jobs. This will create a paradigm shift from traditional teaching into a more functional approach. I believe skilled professionals can bring positive benefits to students given their years of experience in actual work field. It would be nice if a student learns the real application of mathematics in real life in lieu of the boring pen and paper task. Besides, with the Great Depression affecting our economy what we need now is to ensure that we teachers can equip our students with basic skills for them to survive and find skilled jobs in the future.

Skilled professionals are the survivor in today's realm. They are the people who are well versed in basic skills and had the ability to pursue courses related to medicine, computer and education etc. In reality, skilled professionals are able to adjust in our current economic crisis. They are able to shift from one career to another given their academic skills. For example, a teacher can easily find means to pursue second degree like programming because she is equipped with basic english and math skills. Accountants too given their excellence in math skills can easily shift into programming. However, a grocery attendant may find it hard to compete with others in finding high paying job due to lack of basic skills. Our country has been lenient, resulting to a high statistics of students who did not finish high school. Instead of pursuing college they prefer to work in a nearby grocery or gasoline station. With the current crisis, those people who lack education and who have less basic skills are those who easily get layed off.

Back to Basic curriculum is a way to strengthen our educational system. As it focus on basic skills alone, students will be more trained on what is important, to learn how to read, write and excel in math. Students will be able to focus and refrain from other activities like drama and sports. Besides a good teacher will always be able to find means to incorporate other courses in classroom discussion, especially in topic writing. Our district need not spend much program to enhance other courses anymore. Back to Basic curriculum is sufficient to improves student's skill, minimizes school expenditures and strengthens students competitiveness. As the saying goes, what is important is life are only the basics.

Writing Feedback / To be elected as the country's president gives prestige and honor. [2]

Hi,

I'm trying to practice writing more essay for my cbest. Would appreciate feedback. thanks

Topic 3: Organize a well-written essay about a person you know and has become very successful. This success has in some way changed him or her. Explain how he or she is now different.

To be elected as the country's president gives prestige and honor. I consider Philippine's ex-president, Corazon Aquino as a successful person in her political and social era. She was the image of a loving Filipino mother, a dedicated citizen and a devoted child of God. After her presidency, she continued serving her fellow citizens away from limelight. Her political experience paved way for her to change her simple housemother image into becoming active in helping the poor and to fight corruption in the country.

Cory as the Filipinos are fond of calling her is a house mother who ran for presidency after her husband's assasination. She never like to be involved in politics although she gained much political wisdom from his deceased husband. At first, she devoted all her time taking care of her children's financial and emotional needs. She took care of her children and raised them to be respectful and responsible citizens. After her presidency, she remained to be a caring mother to her family by guiding and supporting them in their careers. Although, her active involvement in social and civic campaigns to alienate poverty and corruption was evident. Her presidency experience, changed her to fight for what is just.

Cory imposed in the minds of her children to serve the country even without leadership position. She was a mother who encouraged her children to be socially active in different civic campaigns. She continued her husband's political platform to fight against abusive dictatorship and corruption in the government. She remained a dedicated fellow citizen by emulsifying core values as an honest and humble citizen. She was a politician who did not overuse her power during and after her presidency.

She was the image of a prayerful child of God. She became active in different religious societies and help organize prayer rallies for corrupt government officials. She also contributed much of her personal wealth to fund different charitable programs for the poor families. Cory in times of adversity like family problems and sickness remained prayerful. She devoted much time in reciting her rosary every day. Even after being afflicted with cancer, she pose the image of a faithful person. She remained strong amidst her sickness and placed her trust in God.

Succeeding in life may range from being a president to a local community helper. What really matters is who we become after. Cory choose to change for the good of her country. To be a loving mother, a dedicated citizen and a devoted child of God are the positive traits which she possess. Indeed, a persons success is never measured in terms of wealth but in the impact it made in the lives of other people.

Writing Feedback / Archie isn't just a typical guy I've encountered in my life! - Unforgettable person [4]

Hi,

I would appreciate feedback on my essay. I'm preparing for a liscenship exam this month.

Thanks a lot.

The unforgettable person whom you encountered in life? What made him or her special? How did their life impact yours?

Archie isn't just a typical guy I've encountered in my life. He played a special role in my career as a special education teacher. He was an ideal boss, a dedicated mentor and a good Samaritan. People who knew him could not resist his charm and witt that goes along with his intelligence. He has not only encouraged me to be a good teacher but also motivated a lot of teachers to be passionate with work and be generous to the poor.

The first time he interviewed me, he had a smile and charism that turned me on. There was more to his physical appearance that caught my attention. As a boss, he treated everyone as his friend. He would go out with the group on a Friday night to hang out. He knew the problems of his employees whether it is financial, family or relationship problems. It was a big relief to talk to him whenever I have problems. He listens calmly and gives good advices too. When things don't go right in my classrooms, he helps out in managing the students and corrects my lesson plans. When parents complain about school policies, he talks to them with gentle voice and with respect. Somehow it was so easy for him to solve different school matters in a subtle way.

Archie was a dedicated mentor not just to me but to everyone. A year ago, he managed to squeeze his time to help me out with my thesis paper amidst his tight schedule. He proof read my paper and provided me with different resources for further study. More than the help what really inspired me are his words of wisdom. His unforgettable word for me was "Always be inspired to teach the kids to the best of your ability. And in the end of the day, never forget to share your blessings to poor kids who have no means to go to school."

Amidst Archie's successful career as the school director/owner, he managed to share his wealth to a Foundation for poor children. He was its founder and renders his time to teach the children every weekend. He also busy himself, looking for donors and volunteers to expand different programs for the poor children. Once, he invited me to join his foundation and spend time to teach a kid. I never imagined to see him in his regular shirt and pants, hugging the kids with tattered and smelly clothes. It was a humbling sight for me to see him being a servant to others. He prepared snacks for everyone and joins the kids in singing and dancing. It was really an awesome sight for me. That was the day, I promised myself that I would like to be a person just like him. A man who works with great energy and enthusiasm for other people. He was a selfless and generous person.

Everyone of us have met someone in our lives who may or may not have impacted our lives today. In my life, I will never forget Archie who had changed my image of life. He was an ordinary person who happened to be an ideal, a good mentor and a generous Samaritan all at the same time. His personal qualities will always serve as an inspiring model. His words of wisdom will always be guiding path in my quest to excel in my teaching career.

Writing Feedback / Cbest Essay - Proble in Community [5]

Hi

Would appreciate feedback for my CBEST Essay.

I was in doubt if I should only focus on theft one problem in my community, or should I add more community problem.

Thanks a lot!

ESSAY TOPIC: Describe a problem in your community and how it affected you and the community. Tell how the problem was resolved.

Every day television and newspaper talks about crimes and thefts. Whether around the world or in our community, we can't deny its existence. Life seem to be unsafe nowadays, as we witness numerous theft incidents everywhere. Long time ago we associate theft with perpetrator entering a house and taking away personal things like computer, television, money, jewelries etc. Nowadays, theft is associated with scam by perpetrators who made us believe they are stranger seeking help. But in truth, they try to lure us to get our attention as their co-perpetrator starts his way to steal little things of great value in our car or garage.

I myself was unable to avoid being victimized by those kinds of perpetrators. One sunny afternoon, as I was cleaning up my garage a stranger approached me seeking help with his flat tire. I was too trusting to offer help, little did I know that everything was a big scam. While helping him with his flat tire, another men secretly went into my garage and took away my personal things inside my car. I didn't realize it not until I went looking for my cellphone to make some phone calls. It was depressing that I was a good Samaritan yet everything was just a big scheme.

Thefts and burglary are just one part our community problems. My personal experience was one story to tell, my neighbors to had their own version of burglary in their homes. A neighbor told me the other week, someone just held a knife to him while walking his 2 year old baby along his apartment park. He was completely stunned, when a guy with a smiling face approach him and ask for his wallet. He gave his wallet and did not bother to fight back for his baby's safety. The guy just said thank you and graciously walked away after he got my neighbor's wallet.

As life gets tougher, we ought to be more cautious in our homes. One way to avoid being victimized by theft is to report the incident to your neighborhood authorities. Recently our community has agreed to partake in an action to be one in fighting against theft. Residents volunteered to launch a campaign ads to educate the whole community of diffefent theft scam. Flyers were posted and volunteers were tasked to keep watch of suspected and unknown villagers that may display threat to our neighborhood. Displaying camaraderie and unity in the neighborhood will surely prevent theft. But there is no other guarantee from this burglary but be vigilant in your own homes. Setting up alarms and locking the doors are the best safety precaution you can take. Moreso, educating family members not to talk or allow strangers in your homes is a good action.

We all dream of living in a safe and peaceful community. But in truth, there is no such perfect place to live in. Thefts are rampant everywhere. Perpetrators have used different means to lure us. The best way for us to alleviate theft in our community is to cooperate and work together as one.

Writing Feedback / CBEST Essay - Why I enter education field? [4]

HI

I need help in my Cbest essay this August. Hope you could what are my strong/weak points in the essay. Thanks a lot,

ELAINEDLCRUZ

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What particular experience had the greatest impact on your decision to enter the education field? Explain why that particular experience was so important.

Teaching was in our family blood. My grandparents were principals, my aunts were college professors and my parents owned a small daycare business in our hometown. Choosing to teach children was a part of my childhood dreams. I enjoyed joining the kids in our daycare business during my summer breaks. Then came the era of computers, where my interest shifted from teaching into computer programming. I thought working as a programmer would be my lifelong career until I met Christopher, my nephew. He was a 2 year old diagnosed with cerebral palsy. His disability paved way for me to have a change of heart and to educate myself on how to handle special children.

It was summer of 2005, when I visited my sister in California. It was a vacation intended for me to get away from long hours of computer work. My sister needed extra hand to take care of Christopher. Most of the time, I would bring him to his doctor's appointment and therapy session. Dealing with doctors and therapist enabled me to understand his condition and limitation as a special child. While waiting for him during his therapies, I was able to see more special children waiting in line for their therapy. I even got an opportunity to befriend parents. Our friendship blossomed through sharing and discussion sentiments of having a child with disability. I felt the passion to be with them and to assist them in their struggles.

With the change of heart, I resigned from my work to equip myself on how to understand the world of a special child. My friend offered me to enroll in a masters degree for Special Education. Then came an offer to volunteer in a daycare for children with autism. I grab both opportunities as a volunteer worker in the afternoon and a student in the evening. As time pass by, I just felt more passionate to be with the children. Understanding their needs amidst their tantrums and loving them just like a normal being. It brings joy that I have never felt before. It felt like I was destined to be a teacher too just like my family.

My supposedly vacation from work as a programmer made a big impact in decision to enter the education field. It was a wonderful experience to get to know Christopher's unique world. Choosing teaching for me was a vocation. It was a priceless experience of my life.