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Posts by Halim15 [Suspended]
Name: Halim
Joined: Aug 10, 2016
Last Post: Aug 18, 2016
Threads: 7
Posts: 11  
From: Indonesia
School: UGM

Displayed posts: 18
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Halim15   
Aug 17, 2016
Writing Feedback / The existence of high connectability through electronic letters makes people unsociable [2]

Modern forms of communication such as email and messaging have reduced the amount of time people spend seeing their friends. This has had a negative effect on their social lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In modern era, telecommunication is the highlighted issue to be discussed. Some people believe that the existence of high connection through electronics letter makes them unsociable. I think that technology has transferred too much progress, so I disagree with it.

In the globalization era, internet has become an one of access for connecting people in the world. This statement is will be supported with the matter dealing of people. As we know, publics have many activities in their life, for examples, the matter with their works and the problems with their families. Firstly, in the works, such as about the business and the school, are in any hurry time. Here, People in hurry could be maintenance their time to be on time because they do not need to meet with others as long as having matter, only to send their texts by e-mail. We cannot imagine if e-mail is would not be created in the world. Then, how we can manage our time every day. In the point, the time schedule is would be kept well and the business also could be finished as high quality.

Secondly, that is about the problem with their families. When a student had been studying in another country, so he stayed in there. During he got the best mark for his University, then he wants to share with his family in another state also. In this case, the person does not need to back in his state for suddenly. Only needs for sharing by electronic mail or by mobile phone. Fortunately, his project would send as well to his aim without interfere or spending time during he was studying in another country.

Finally, the existence of high technology is more and more helpful for humans. That is not only about useful of short meeting but also the point is a valuable time or creativity for managing time as well.
Halim15   
Aug 14, 2016
Writing Feedback / Work or travel? The dilemma of adolescents after finishing third school and before beginning college [4]

TASK 2
In some countries young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this.


In several states, the dilemma of adolescents after finishing third school and before beginning in college is a controversial issue. According to the statement, however it takes on positive and negative effects.

The benefit for traveling in space time after third school is teenager could survive to know about the University to be. They can travel in another city to get much information access about the quality of Universities, and what kinds of subject that they will choose. Because it is the chance for many new students to catch much of consideration how to find the best decision. At the point, this would help them for preparation for coming test in the University that they will be taken.

From the other side, there is bad thing also if they do not get much advantageous at the moment because it can be taken directly from in the space time before the lecture will begin. Unfortunately, the utility of short time has been spent for useless something. For instance, traveling is just for to go to some places without does not have project destination.

Finally, there are good thing and bad thing about two views. However it would depend on people to manage their time to be successful.
Halim15   
Aug 14, 2016
Writing Feedback / TASK 1 The first chart below shows the result of a survey which sampled a cross-section of 100,000 p [3]

TASK 1
The first chart below shows the result of a survey which sampled a cross-section of 100,000 people asking if they traveled abroad and why they traveled for period 1994-98. The second chart shows their destinations over the same period.

The charts compare between a number of visits abroad and the destination in the period 1994-98. It can be seen that people of Western Europe are the highest number for visiting vacation.

According to the chart, in 1998 went up visitor about 20,700 only for getting long weekend. Then, the next reason was 3,957 for searching a job; 3,181 for visiting their families; and 990 for another intention.

Then the second chart shows that Western Europe have dominated about 24,519 in 1998. After that, it was following by North America approximately 1,823 and by other regions around 2,486. This data showed if the journey to be on holiday increased for traveling in Western Europe than North America at 1,823.

Note - you will be suspended if you continue posting WEAK advice in other students' topics.



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Halim15   
Aug 13, 2016
Writing Feedback / In the modern era, internet has become one of the greatest things in the world [3]

Some people say that the internet provides people with a lot of valuable information. Others think access to so much information creates problem. Which view do you agree with? Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion.

In modern era, internet has become one of the greatest in the world. Some people could accept about the existence of it, but others are judgment opposite. I think that internet brings us advantages and disadvantages.


First of all, internet gives people many benefits. Because general public could access what is they want or what is going on. For instance, society can find many kinds of news or everything on it; students have opportunity to learn about lectures or doing their duty from university; the common reason is for using high or smart communication by internet even though people who are not in same place-in different country. High global communication makes people in the world easy to access or contact each other.


Unfortunately, internet has the bad influence for users if they are not supposed to read. However, this is bad thing for societies even children. According to the reason which is not support of internet, I think that is right opinion. Here, we need the bridge of this controversial with keeping security or privacy. In addition, parents can attend with their kids when they are working on it. As seen, both views giving common sense for all.


In conclusion, however I am very keen on because internet is undeniable in this modern era.
Halim15   
Aug 12, 2016
Writing Feedback / "What will future jobs look like? by Andrew McAfee, TED" [2]

Hi Risty :)

If want to talk about TED videos, you can see that there is a speaker who speaks to the audiences, including your writing. So, you need to write anything in the speaker's point of view. For instance, "Obama in this TED Talk Video mentioned that cooperation with another countries is important ............." . You need to learn more about direct vs indirect citation / quotation

Thank you :)
keep writing !
Halim15   
Aug 12, 2016
Writing Feedback / I accept as true that studying history and literature are needed by students [5]

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? It is more important for students to study history and literature than it is for them to study science and mathematics. Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion.

Learning of subjects is essential for scholars. Some people believe that pupils need for studying history and literature. However, others reason that science and mathematics are important too. Even though these are idea could be accepted to some context, here I will be summary to contribute both of them.

First of all, I accept as true that studying history and literature are needed by students. Because learners know exactly how about the old story had made in the world. For instance, they need for knowing World War I, World War II, and Cold War; they must know round of their hero's people in the world; overall what did happen in the past. When they could identify of them, it makes the huge range of their knowledge. So that, the strong analysis of them could be used when they recognize many cases such as political, economics, world history, and many kinds of literature.

From the other side, I think that for learning science and mathematics is vital. For the reason, it teaches people to think logical ability. So this is requirement also since children were in primary school. It is clear that every individual must pick up about of them subject lesson in school.

To sum up all mentioned above, both views are the great consequence for future.
Halim15   
Aug 12, 2016
Writing Feedback / Summary, National Geographic This Chart Shows How U.S. Carbon Emissions Are Rising-Again [5]

The United State is the big industrial state in the world. This made U.S as contributor of carbon emission on earth. This is part of big challenge problem for all human life.

There are two reasons of it, because of energy consume and economic growth. Firstly, the United State needs much energy to their companies. The companies could produce of many kind of production. That is good for its state and other state. But unfortunately, that is bad for environment because of air pollutant, both of people or animal in the world. Secondly, U.S has been growing for its future economic. So that, U.S always needs consumption of energy without stop. We can see if the United State still for surviving with its production to help its development economic.

In conclusion, this is big problem that has not been conclusion until now. Because that is very close about Emissions are rising largely because of recent economic growth
Halim15   
Aug 12, 2016
Writing Feedback / Always telling the truth is the most consideration in any relationship between people? [4]

Hi Cindyliu :)

Please, do not use abbreviation in academic writing. ...,we can'tcannot find second person

...as you didwant

Somethings Sometimes you think if it is right, but others don'topposite

What did u mean about this sentence? In this situation, being an honest person all the time is the main factor to firmly connect the relationship?

Then people will comes come close to you

Actually, this needs more check again overall, please for checking again your writing, I have been waiting for next.. :)

Thank you :)
Halim15   
Aug 11, 2016
Writing Feedback / Just a few hours' exercise a week makes your heart grow bigger [4]

Hi Eka :)

I have just read your summary today and i want to give you suggestion, I hope u are not mad :)

...there are many people who dies from hearth attactattack

According toDeclan O'Regan at Imperial College London

Keep writing Eka :)
Best regards,
Halim15   
Aug 11, 2016
Writing Feedback / Summary TED The reasons companies fail-and how to avoid them [3]

Every company needs to grow so the owner ignores for not getting any profit. There is real solution to make superiority growth of business. Both of them, would discuss to be clearly.

Actually, the important is the balance between two activities, they are exploration and exploitation. Firstly, exploration is about what is going on or what is new. Today-what is the new products and what is the new innovations for changing future. We knew about people who had exploration, such as Neil Armstrong, Hillary. But we have to know if the exploration would make risky. Secondly, that is about exploitation-opposite with the first reason. Exploitation is taking for high information, facts, and data. At least, that is better for making good products faster than yet. Unfortunately, the big impact of exploitation is about risky would happen in long term than exploration, because firms exploit only.

In conclusion, however the corporation should balance with exploration and exploitation, even though this is hard to implementation on work.
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