Unanswered [9] | Urgent [0]
  

Posts by yirunli
Joined: Jul 9, 2013
Last Post: Jun 6, 2014
Threads: 7
Posts: 17  

From: China

Displayed posts: 24
sort: Latest first   Oldest first  | 
yirunli   
Jun 6, 2014
Writing Feedback / IELTS - To encourage old people using mobile phones and the internet [3]

Topic Mobile phones and the internet are very useful. However, it is rare for old people to use them. What ways could mobile phones and the internet be useful to old people? How does the old people to be encouraged using this new technology?

There are many great inventions of the 20th-century. Among the inventions mobile phones and the internet are widely used in our life; nevertheless, old people rarely use them because they have not realized the benefits of mobile phones and the internet.

Obviously, mobile phones and the internet could be useful to old people in various ways. To start with, both of them are convenient. For example, if old people carrying mobile phones encounter difficulties outdoors, they will call for help immediately instead of finding a booth. In addition, the internet can help old people to collect extensive information. There is no doubt that searching for news online is effective and time-saving. Furthermore, people using the internet can save their money. As is known to all, online shopping provides a platform for individuals to purchase cheaper products.

As mobile phones and the internet are helpful, it is necessary to encourage old people using them. Firstly, to help old people get familiar with the new technology, our government can offer some elementary courses about using mobile phones and the internet. Secondly, the fees of network services can be reduced for seniors so that they will be willing to use them. Last but not least, we can propagate the ideas that using mobile phones and the internet can better our life. Once old people are aware of the advantages brought by the new technologies, they will start to use mobile phones and the internet intentionally.

In conclusion, old people should not stay away from the new technologies and they should be encouraged using them.
yirunli   
Jun 3, 2014
Writing Feedback / IELTS - If Police should carry guns or not? [8]

Topic Unlike other countries, police in UK do not carry guns. Some think it leaves citizen unprotected, other think it reduce the overall violence in the society. Discuss.

It is common that in various countries the police are carrying guns when they are on patrol, but in UK they do not carry guns. Some people state that is risky because individuals are unprotected, whereas other people claim that the overall violence in the society is decreased. As far as I am concerned, I would side with the former group.

On one hand, we should acknowledge that police patrolling without guns may lead to serious consequences. In the first place, it is hard for them to deal with emergencies. For example, policemen without guns cannot stop an armed criminal robbing a bank. In addition, the crime rate may be increased because criminals are not threatened by the authority. Furthermore, the economic growth may slow down due to the unsafe environment. People will not invest in the local market unless they are protected. Therefore, it is necessary for the police to carry guns so that they are able to protect our societies against criminals.

On the other hand, police not carrying guns may carry certain benefits. To start with , it can save the funds as the governments do not need to purchase weapons. Moreover, policemen without guns look more friendly than those carrying guns. It is also a signal that the police force is trying to deter crime peacefully.

To sum up, although there are a few benefits since the police are unarmed, I firmly believe that they shall carry guns in order to better protect our citizens and societies.
yirunli   
May 28, 2014
Writing Feedback / IELTS - Zoos are cruel or useful? [6]

Topic Some people think zoos are cruel and all the zoos should be closed. However, some people think zoos are useful to protect the rare animals.Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

Protecting animals is a very popular topic in contemporary society. Zoos as the place to see live animals are criticized by some people stating zoos should be closed because it is so cruel to cage animals. However, other people think zoos can help us to protect the rare animals. As far as I am concerned, I am in favor of the latter view.

There is no doubt that zoos have been protecting the animals. First of all, it is necessary to keep some animals in the zoo since living in the wild does not suit them. For example, pandas as endangered species are well-fed and well cared in the national zoo, whereas those wild pandas are facing serious issues such as deforestation and lack of food. In addition, zoos are appropriate places to educate people rather than entertain them. People visiting zoos are not only browsing but also learning the way to take care of animals. If all the zoos are closed, it will be hard to find a place that people can gain knowledge about animals vividly. Last but not least, zoos can be the source of funds for the research of protecting rare animals. It is clear that more investments will make the research work more effective.

Admittedly, it is true that some animals are treated badly in some zoos. For instance, animals are forced to perform to attract more visitors so that the income of zoos will be increasing. Moreover, some animals are weak and unhealthy because they are not offered enough food and medicine.

To sum up, though in some zoos the living conditions of animals are not affirmative, overall zoos are useful because it they have made contributions to protecting rare animals in forms of offering education place, funds, etc.
yirunli   
May 24, 2014
Writing Feedback / IELTS - Rejecting job opportunities - POSITIVE OR NEGATIVE? [4]

Topic - Sometimes people are rejecting a job opportunity due to their age or other circumstances. Is it a negative or a positive approach? Give your opinion and relevant examples.

At present most people are suffering from lack of job opportunities, but some people are not willing to work and they reject job opportunities due to their age or other reasons. I think it is a negative approach rather than a positive one, because it can cause lots of serious issues in our society.

First of all, it is hard for people without jobs to afford their living cost. Apparently, our societies have to spend money on the welfare and charity in order to help unemployed people to sustain their lives. Thus, rejecting job opportunities can lead to more waste of public money.

In addition, a person rejecting a job opportunity is a poor role model for young people as his behaviour encourages youngsters to avoid working. For example, if a newbie encounter a difficulty at work, he will consider quitting the job as people refusing the job offer. Therefore, the amount of unemployed people may be increased and our economy may be developed slowly.

Admittedly, some people are not suitable for some jobs. For instance, people whose age are over 60 are not able to do physical works. Moreover, people with communicable disease are not allowed to work at some places such as kitchen and clinic. Hence, it is essential for people to reject job opportunities under certain circumstances.

To sum up, though rejecting a job opportunity for someone is necessary, overall it has more negative effects than positive ones to our society.
yirunli   
May 24, 2014
Writing Feedback / IELTS - parents should teach children / or school is the place? [5]

Parents are the first person for a child, whom they start learning from.

i would say "Parents are the first person whom children start learning from "

in different kind of situations

in different kinds of situations

both the parents

both parents
yirunli   
May 22, 2014
Writing Feedback / IELTS - PRICE OF THE AIRPLANE TICKETS [6]

Topic In many countries prices of airplane tickets have dropped. Is it positive or negative situation? Write about your personal experience or knowledge.

Nowadays travelling around the world is much easier than the old days. One of the main reasons is the prices of airplane tickets is going down. Thus, more and more people choose airplane as their transportation because they can afford the fare of tickets. As a student, I prefer cheap tickets to expensive ones.

There is no doubt that lower prices of tickets benefit people in many ways. To start with, people spend less money on purchasing the airplane tickets. Therefore, the number of customers of airlines is incresing rapidly because people are willing to take airplanes. In addition, it is helpful to the economic growth. As more tourists coming, the amount of job opportunities and national revenue has kept growing. Last but not least, it can promote the understanding between different culture as long as people have more chances to visit other countries.

Admittedly lower prices of airplane tickets have advantages, but drawbacks still exist. For instance, some people state that air travel leads to environmental problem. As is known to all, petrol as the fuel of airplanes causes the increase of air pollution. Furthermore, it is possible that some airlines will go bankrupt because they can not undertake offering tickets with lower price.

In conclusion, though the low airfare has its negative side, I still believe that the reduction of ticktets' price is beneficial to people's lives and our societies.
yirunli   
May 19, 2014
Writing Feedback / IELTS - International tourism leads to both - tension and understanding [5]

Hi guys,

Could u please review my essay for IELTS?

Topic - International tourism has become the biggest industry in the world. Some people think it causes tension between people from different culture. Others think it leads to understanding between countries. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

I agree with both opinions that international tourism not only causes tension but also leads to understanding between people from different culture, because most people will be trying to understand each other after they have conflict or debates.

There is no doubt that some behaviors of the tourists are not welcome in the local area. Firstly, some people leave the rubbish after visiting the attractions. Therefore, those local residents have to clean the place frequently so that the new batch of tourists will have a tidy and neat environment. Moreover, tourists may offend the local people due to their different culture background. For example, Indians don't eat beef since they worship cows. Thus, if tourists want to respect the tradition, they will not order any beef in the local restaurant.

On the other hand, in order to avoid the conflicts between foreigners and locals, people are trying to understand different culture and find solutions. For instance, tourists are given the brochures about the local traditions and customs before they visit the place. Furthermore, the tour guide are willing to help tourists to understand the culture from other countries. Thus, the possibility of the conflicts is reduced because the understanding between both parties.

Obviously, people are looking for the solution such as understanding each other while they encounter the conflicts caused by international tourism. Hence, I think international tourism leads to both tension and understanding between people from different culture.
yirunli   
Jul 10, 2013
Writing Feedback / 'cultural homogenization'; Effects of increasing tourism in different countries [6]

he volume of tourists ascending on many tourist attractions means that the government has to improve the infrastructure and build many attractive places for the tourists. Consequently, the country is more developed and the economy is growing thanks to the money the government invests.

Your idea is great and I love it.
yirunli   
Jul 9, 2013
Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK 2: I think it is worth being a celebrity in spite of the problems [3]

Being a celebrity - such as a famous file star or sports personality - brings problems as well as benefits.
Do you think that being a celebrity brings more benefits or more problems?


Nowadays, with the development of media, it is convenient to seek out the information about those celebrities; for instance, a famous movie star died due to drugs. We often hear that some celebrities make troubles which usually lead to serious consequences, but being a celebrity does bring them benefits such as fame or money. In my opinion, being a celebrity brings more benefits than problems.

Firstly, being a celebrity means a satisfying and successful life. As is known to all, a famous person can earn a good living while most people are hankering for a wealthy lifestyle. In addition, celebrities are not only wealthy but also powerful in the communities. They are respected by the common people as their outstanding and professional performance. For example, a great football player has appealed to most of his fans to save children from hunger. Furthermore, it is easy for a celebrity to get a promotion and development on his career or business, because people regard him as a rich trusty person.

On the other hand, there are some problems to be a celebrity such as privacy leak, unhealthy lifestyle and lack of freedom. A celebrity cannot avoid these problems as long as he is popular. Once he can get rid of these, he is no longer famous and loses all the benefits.

To sum up, I think it is worth being a celebrity in spite of the problems. If a celebrity has enough patience and tolerance, finally he will figure out a way to get over those problems, and he can still keep the benefits. Thus, being a celebrity brings more benefits than problems.
Writing
Editing Help?
Fill in one of the forms below to get professional help with your assignments:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳