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Posts by aliceNN
Joined: Sep 12, 2013
Last Post: Sep 27, 2013
Threads: 8
Posts: 23  
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From: China

Displayed posts: 31
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aliceNN   
Sep 27, 2013
Writing Feedback / TOEFL;should universities spend more money on salaries for university professors? [4]

do u agree or disagree with the following statement?
To improve the quality of education,universities should spend more money on salaries for university professors.

Quality of education is considered to the prerequisite for universities' prestige as well as more good students enrollment. Consequently, improving quality of education is a extremely crucial issue for university to deal with.There are plenty of ways to enhance quality, hiring teachers with better certificate, improving equipments and facilities of university, spending more money on salaries for professors etc. Some people maintain that increasing university professors' salary is the best way to improve quality of educatin, while others refute it. As far as I concerned, university should do more sensible ways to improve quality od educatin instead of only spending more money on professors' salary.

To begin with, spending more money on professors'salary is not a effctive way when it comes to improve quality of educatin. Increasing salary benefits most for professor, students have a indirectly influence even nothing at all.When getting a higher salary, their quality of life would improve. Accordingly, professors can use more money to develop their subsidiary jods. For example, finance professor who intersted in planting flowers, he can spend more money to build a garden and decorate his garden with a variety of flowers, whereas it can distract his energy from regular teaching.

In addition, there are a swarm of means that are more effective than improving salaries of professors with respect to enhancing quality of educatin.Spending more money on facilities and equipments of university, which would give students a good condition to study as well as do sports.Advenced facilities and equipment can inspire students' ethusiasm towards study and encourage them to exercise frequently.Futhermore, hiring teachers with better qualify is a good way to improve quality of education as well. High qualified teachers can give their students more wise suggestions and guide them study towards in a right direction. These teachers not only focus their students' academic performance, but also focus their psychological behavior.

Although improving professors' salaries can bring some merits to quality of education. For instance, improving their positivity to furthur their research, paying more attention to their students,enhancing their enthsusiasm for their teaching job. Despites these merits, I still disagree with the title statement that universities should spend more money on salaries for university professors, as a result of students can benefit little from this.
aliceNN   
Sep 27, 2013
Writing Feedback / TOEFL; Parents are our important teachers during children's life [4]

I need ur help!
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
parents are more involved in their children's education than the parents in the past.

Parents are our important teachers during children's life. Not only teaching , they are ones who love us most in the world, so they always pay much attention on any apectes of our life when children are growing up.Nowadays , parents are increasingly invovled in our education compared with in the past. Some states that parents should leave a comparatively free space to their children to study, whereas others refute it. As far as I concerned, parents are indeedly more focus on their children's education.

To begin with, the fierce competition. In the past, society is not as advanced as today's, people can not get good educatin .Consequently, theyhave a lot of other things to do apart from studying for example help their parents to farm and cook , and parents won't invovled their study.However, with the rapid development of technology and science, a swarm of talents and elits continuously emerge.Under this pressure condition, parents feel a strong sense of pressure so that they will pay much attention to their children's education, hoping their kids would study harder , graduate with a better degree and then get a satisfied job.Besides the compulsory circumstences, they will take their children to learn art, music , sport and so on. Becuse they want their children to have competitiveness among other graduates in the future.

In addition, there are much more temptations than in the past, which would distract children from study. Particularly, in big , morden cities, loads of entertainments are established, which is a huge tempt for children. Beacuse lacked of self-control, some children would addicted to these entertainments, for instances, palying computer or doing shopping everyday, which would lead to bad performance in their study.Accordingly, parents act as a supervisor to prompt their children to study.Nevertheless, in the past, there are few things attractive, so parents did not focus more on their children's education.

In my opinion,it's no doubt that more and more attention are paid to children's education. Futhermore, all of these fatcs owing to parents's unselfish love to their children.
aliceNN   
Sep 26, 2013
Writing Feedback / IELTS: Should the government subsidise heavy indsustries to improve economic development? [7]

If governments financed some heavy industrial projects in such regions, not only many employment opportunities would create but also the income of local poor residents would increase therefore the quality of life and standard of living would increase.

this sentence is a little bit long, I think you can divide into two short ones.
aliceNN   
Sep 22, 2013
Writing Feedback / TOEFL ; Parents should encourage children to do part-time jobs [3]

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
One of the best ways that parents can help their teenage children prepare for adult life is to encourage them to take a part-time job.

It's generally agreed that the charactirestic of independent and thrifty which to children are the prerequisite for a successful adult life.To help their offsprings live a good adult life ,most parents think part-time job is a best way, while others refutes it. To agree or disagree the statement that parents raise their childen in allowing them to get a part-time job is one of the best ways to prepare them an adult life is a matter of balancing its pros and cons. However, if one considers it carefully, he or she may agree the title statement as I do.

To begin with, getting a part-time job can foster out sense of independence and enhance our monetary value. Children are too young to undertand the hardness of earning money, especially for children who comes from a afflluent family. They live in an innovative life without money consideration , consequently , they seldom feel money is hard to earn.What's more, they can buy everything they want through a credit card getting form their parents, so, they are much more dependent on their parents.Nevertheless, compared to rich children, children who comes from poor family often consider making a living at their early age.They would choose to take a full-time or part-time to deduct their parents burden.Furthurmore, the recent reasearch shows that children from poor family are more independent and planful than children from rich family.

In addition, getting a part-time job can improve the communicating ability of children. Taking a part-time job means that children spent the majority of their workday communicating with society. They may get along with various people from diffrent hobbies, even from different country, having different culture and religion. During the process of communicating with these people, children not only can enhance their social ability, but also have a mature outlook of society, which is good for their future adult life.

However, some parents may maintain that take a part-time job can odistract their children from academic study and spend lots of their energy. Despite these facts, as far as I concerned, part-time job bring a swarm of merits outweigh drawbacks ,accordingly, children should be encouraged to get a part-timr job to lay a good foundation of their adult life.
aliceNN   
Sep 22, 2013
Writing Feedback / Amount of violence in films - ACADEMIC IELTS Writing task2 essay [4]

It can be considered as a diversity of information but they can be also involved a lot harmful advertisement and programme which can affect our lives negetively so I am going to explain why there are more harm than good

I think this sentence can be divided into two parts.
aliceNN   
Sep 20, 2013
Writing Feedback / work quickly, risk making mistakes or slowly? 'depends on our current situation' [5]

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
In today's world, it is more important to work quickly and risk making mistakes than to work slowly and make sure that everything is correct.

Suppose you are doing an important project, you have two choices.One is working fast accompany with the risk of making mistakes, another is working slowly accompany with a good correction quality.Which way do you prefer? I think no one can give me a sure response.As a result of both two ways have merits and drawbacks respectively, in my opinion, it cannot be judged completely to the title statement that work quickly and take risk of making mistakes outweigh work slowly and make everything correct.

On the one hand, working fast accompany with risk of making mistakes is more crucial than working slowly accompany with a correction quality when it comes to time limitation. A small example to light this point. In the barrier running match, the first prize is judged according to time, so, athletes always concerned more about time than across the barriers successfully.No matter when they are in campaign or in general practice, to win the campaign, running fast than others is the prime factor, and crossing barriers successfully is subsidiary factor.Even if they have a little more time fail to cross the barriers than other athletes, running fast can decrease the possibility of lagging behind than others.

On the other hand, the former is less important than the latter in terms of quality. For example, when you writing a thesis, and you have enough time towards deadline.It is not sensible to work quickly, and make lots of mistakes, as a result of you may not get pass from your professor. Nevertheless, if you arrange your time properly, work slowly, and make every part of your thesis is correct, you would get a good grade. Even if you hand in the paper over the due date , the professor may give you an exception under the foundation of your good job.Consequently, I do really thought the outcome of slowly work but good quality outcome is much better than fast work but poor quality outcome with respect to quality consideration.

Although these two ways is not as perfect as we thought , we can choose them appropriately depending on our current situation. only if we choose them properly, can we make our project better.
aliceNN   
Sep 19, 2013
Writing Feedback / TOEFL; "traveling ten thousands miles"; The best way to travel is in a group [4]

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
The best way to travel is in a group led by a tour guide.

As a Chinese old saying goes" traveling ten thousands miles and reading ten thousands books is the top idea for people."People always considered about travel is a way to enlarge their outlook and relax their tired mindset. Moreover, determine choose which sort of travel is the foundation of a good trip, some prefer to travel by themselves, while others desire to travel by a group.To agree or disagree the statement that traveling in a group by a tour guide is the best way is a matter of balancing its pros and cons. However , if one considers it carefully, he or she may disagree the title statement as I do.

To begin with, travel on our own means that we can choose palces that we are most interested in without any limitations. All things are depended on ourselves.We can make an elaborate plan by ourselves , when to arrive, where to see , what to eat and how to get there.What's more, we can cancel some expensive and time-comsuming schedules in terms of limitation of money and time.However, travel with a group cannot enjoy such a freedom.Suppose you travel in a group , travel agency often make some unnecessary plans to gain profit from these activities , and tour guides always to take you to some souvenir shops to buy loads of unpractical items and commodities, which they can get additional fee.

In addition, travel by ourselves allow us to have a loose visiting time to enjoy landscape better. We can decide when to arrive, when to have a rest and when to leave the sights during the travel process. Nevertheless, due to it's hard to in harmony with other travelers in terms of visiting time when we travel in a group, travel agencies often take a rigid shedule to visit landcapes for visitors, which can decrease ensusiastic of visitors and destroy their journey to some extent.

Although travelling by a group can deduct energy and time we spent on planning our trip, I prefer travel by ourselves, because we can make desicion on our own, and from this decision-making process, we can not only creat a original and wonderful journey but also improve our disicion making abilities.
aliceNN   
Sep 18, 2013
Writing Feedback / TOEFL; making teachers' social or political views known to students cannot be judged completely. [10]

This is HOOK

Apart form acquiring knowledge in the school,students may concern about social issues or political activities happened currently.

this is Backgound

In the class,to improve teaching, teachers sometimes combine their social or political comments with teaching context, some people think it's not a proper way of teaching, while others refutes.

and this is Thesis statement

To agree or disagree the statement that teachers should discuss their social or political comments with students in the classroom is a matter of balancing its pros and cons. However, in my point of view, the issue that making teachers' social or political views known to students in the classroom cannot be judged completely.

which part do I need to change ?
aliceNN   
Sep 18, 2013
Writing Feedback / TOEFL; making teachers' social or political views known to students cannot be judged completely. [10]

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
Teachers should not make their social or political views known to students in the classroom.

Apart form acquiring knowledge in the school,students may concern about social issues or political activities happened currently. In the class,to improve teaching, teachers sometimes combine their social or political comments with teaching context, some people think it's not a proper way of teaching, while others refutes.To agree or disagree the statement that teachers should discuss their social or political comments with students in the classroom is a matter of balancing its pros and cons. However, in my point of view, the issue that making teachers' social or political views known to students in the classroom cannot be judged completely.

To begin with, teachers would be a misguider for students in society and politic aspects. For students, teachers are more likely to be a light during their education period.So, students' threads may mostly rely on their teachers views towards some issues , especially issues they do not familiar with, and this fact would leave a possibility to students distort social things. For example, my social teacher is a rigorous person and he always criticize some hot social issues and the president's recent activities in the classroom, when these critics comes from our students ' ears, our impression towards society and government is influenced more or less.

Moreover, Stating social or political views in the classroom often make the teaching process slower than usual. Teachers who want to make their social or political ideas known to students may delay their teaching process. For instance, some teachers may comment some social issues so eloquent that they always forget themselves and the time, especially they may deflect the point far away from what they have to teach unawarely, consequently, make their teaching process more slowly.

However, every coin has two sides. Showing their social and political views can narrow the gap between students. Teachers share their comments to their students means that it's free to demonstrates one's ideas in the classroom , so students can join this discussion and communicate their comments with respect to society and politic without any limitation.Teachers would be their guider or listener,as a result of it, their relationship would be closer and the atmosphere of classroom would be more warmer.
aliceNN   
Sep 17, 2013
Writing Feedback / TOEFL; Ability to Relate Well to people Vs Studying Hard [7]

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
For success in a future job, the ability to relate well to people is more important than studying hard in school.

To agree or disagree the statement that as far as getting a successful job in the future concerned, good ability of relating to people is more crucial than studying hard in the univeirsity is a matter of balancing its pros and cons. However, if one coniders the issue carefully, he or she may agree the title statement as I do.

First of all, friends is a treasure with respect to either our daylife or our career.Relating well to people can bring plenty of merits to future job. Having a good ability of relate to people means you have a number of friends in a variety of fields, imagine when you are in trouble, you have a lot of people who have good relationship with you, so you can ask for your friends to help you solve this problem as soon as possible, even an esy phone call, instend of a series of complex solutions.

Futuermore, no matter who you are a top-level managers of a company or a low-level employee of that company, relating well to people is also a importent issue. If top-level managers want to make a project successful , have a good relationship with their subordinaries is the prerequisit for the managers' work complete successfully, managers should listen to their employees needs and complaints about this job, pay much patiant and care to them. Consequently, make a good relationship with them.

on the ither side, if a low-level empolyee desire to enhance his position, it's fairly important to have a good relationship with their boss, only if the employee is considered excellent in his boss's eyes, he will be more possile to enhance position.

However, someone may maintain that good specify knowledge is more crucial for future job. Studying harder in school , getting a good resume and absorbing lots of working knowledge, which can make these graduates more competitive than other applicants in one certain job.But imagine it, a person who is good at working knowledge but has an poorly relate to people, and a person who has a good ability of relating to people but his working knowlodge is less better than the former , which person do you want to be? I think majority of people would choose the former because it has more chance than the latter in terms of getting good jobs in the future.

In my point of view, I do really prefer to improve my ability of relating people and make more friends rather than studying hard in school.
aliceNN   
Sep 16, 2013
Writing Feedback / TOEFL; Children & their own money? lack of self-control and financing conception [7]

thank u~ Aloha363
this sentence is better.

On the other side , learning to manage their own money at early age would directly cause them bad effects

I'll take ur advice.

This sentences is too long . U can divide it into : " as we know, compared to adults, children would lack of self-control and financing concept, so they may can't stand of temptation of delicated toys, beautiful dress, lovely dolls, etc . Consequently , they waste majority of their own money to buy these items without carefully consideration

btw, do u think the structure of my passage is ok?
aliceNN   
Sep 12, 2013
Writing Feedback / TOEFL; Children & their own money? lack of self-control and financing conception [7]

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? In order to become financially responsible adults, children should learn to manage their own money at young age.

To agree or disagree the statement that children should be their own money spending decider in order to be more responsible when they become an adult is a matter of balancing of its pros and cons.However as far as I concerned, when people consider this statement carefully, he or she is attribute to the agreement as I do.

First, Managing money at a young age can bring loads of merits to children growing progerss. They can learn to be more independent throughing planning their monetary activities. When parents give their children a monthly fee, which is a start to children, they may divide their money into several parts according to their dailylife activities and their hobbies. Gaining their own money shows that either they can buy commodities and items they want or they should act as their mom to make an realiable spending plan in case of they run out of their money while the month is not end.Via this process, children would make up for their over-spending mistake , learn how to make the cost more sensiblely, consequently, to be an more planful and responsible adult.

However, Managing money is not a only phrase. As every coin has two sides, children learn to manage their own money at their early age would cause some disadvantages to them. As we know, compared to adults, children would lack of self-control and financing concept, so they may can't stand of temptation of delicated toys, beautiful dress, lovely dolls, etc, and thus spend majority of their own money to buy these items without carefully consideration. Under this situation, parents are the best guider and supervisor to them, if parents pay enough attention to their children witn respect to their spending plan, this concern will be solved.

Generally speaking, allowing children to manage their own money at their early age can lead to children a responsible life, the advantages of this issue overweigh the disadvantages of this issue, in my point of this view, children should control their own money with the accompany of their parents' closely guide.
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